SPACE: one hundred one story of surrealism | English book

Глава 1

SPACE: one hundredone story of surrealism

Good morning my new reader! Welcome to my world of unimaginable, breathtaking and burning universe. Here, on the way home, through the thorny and sharp thorns of pleasure, you will fall into magic. Here, the wildest dreams become reality, the most childish fantasies come to life, and the monsters from under the bed in your room begin to sob non-stop, so that only this story will never end. In truth, only a few of you will master it, but those few of them who start will never think in a formula again. We cut all standards to shreds, into small wallpapers of universes. Here every story comes to life with new paint!

This book is an amazing world of magic and fantasy, bewitching, beautiful and so crazy! Have a good journey, wanderer who has entered the pages of parallel universes, space-time and black holes!

Ah, here it is - the Earth, so round, ripe, like an apricot, you can’t say that a billion small parasites live there. Look... A worm the size of the Eiffel Tower jumps out of a volcano, and dives back into the earth, eating it from the inside, chewing its way to Australia. Well, he has teeth, I wonder. Greedy. They say that worms do not like poison very much, therefore they bypass the nuclei. It couldn't be otherwise. And there, on the clouds, on this earth - there, you know, penguins are sitting. They flew here from the south, when it became completely unbearable to live. Pay the mortgage, pay the utilities. They are tired of everything. To catch fish and feed the children, what else! Children have flippers, let them feed themselves, let them find food for themselves and get it. The penguins have risen high into the sky and perched on the clouds, and are watching when it will be possible to slide down them into the ocean and swim away to the polar bears. They say, polar bears didn't see them, it will be funny to see how a penguin swims up to a polar bear, but he does not understand whether it is a fish or a bird. Or a log - that's all. Or still killer whale. No, of course, there is nothing funny about this, the penguin is very dangerous, he will lift the bear high into the sky and throw it into a cliff somewhere in a canyon in America, and the bear really does not like it when it is hot. He will pull out a fan and blow into it. Who loves, right? The bear will cry, the fan does not help, and will become straw, so dry, terrible. The Indians will find him, think that people from the city left them so that they would not starve, they will throw him on his back, tie him with a rope and go to the waterfall. They will sit down by the waterfall to drink water, and then ... the dried meat will absorb the splashes from the oasis, get up, come to life and tear off the head of the Indian with his paw, and say that he did not want to. Well, how could I not want it, since I tore it off, I really wanted it, I assure you, he wanted all this, what a liar fart, tell me? Well, don't say so. I took offense at you. By the way, what am I offended by? Oh, yes, well, they drove. So. And these Indians...

The Indians have always loved to tempt fate, because a long time ago they came up with a rite that made them immortal, and therefore, that Indian stood up, took his head, shook off the sand, screwed it in place, and extended his hand to the bear. He is not a dangerous Indian. Kind. Make friends, just wanted to. The bear grabbed a hand with its mighty, sharp, well, as befits all bears, paw, and squeezing it, hit it several times on the stones, smearing all its insides over the layer, until the Indian grabbed the bear with his teeth and gnawed it to the bone. They didn't eat for several months. The teeth have not been eaten for a long time, and the stomach, and the intestines, and the liver. Yes, and worms, and they are very hungry for food. The bear fell in battle with his equal. The Indians killed him in no time. Worms then spat wool for two weeks. And the Indians, those who have seen, say they go without panties, because six covered them from behind. Forgot about shorts in general. And the penguin croaked, looked at it from his cloud, and laughed, threw sardines down. While they were flying, they were rotten. That day, all the flies around the canyon were feasting. The Indians were washed off the flies for two days, until they themselves became flies because the arriving wings made them fly. The Indians flew all night long, looking for this and that, they didn’t find what they were looking for, and then they also found what they were looking for. One of them was an old oak, they have been looking for it since last Sunday, they left their friend “White Mongoose” here, they all liked to call each other names of animals, they believed that if you take the name of an eagle, after death you will become an eagle. So, Mongoose, became a mongoose after death, however, he was tied to a chain, that oak was on golden chains, the scientist cat made circles on that chain and sang songs, a mermaid sat on the branches, only they did not save the "white mongoose" which became an ordinary mongoose, and he dried up, became an ornament of the oak root. Words were spared on him and they did not make him immortal. The mermaid had a high opinion of herself. She sat, and she herself was very high and dyed her hair pink with silt. I couldn’t step on the branches in any way, the absence of the second leg all the time interfered. The cat was a scientist, although he was smart, like, I don’t know, like a mole, or like a four-fingered monitor lizard, but he didn’t think of giving a hand. Because he knew: “a kind person will give a hand to a suffering creature,” and he has something at the very paw. Well, not fate, so it was a hand in hand. And so the “white mongoose” died that day. A bear would not have wished this on anyone, and the penguin, glory to all the kings of animals, was not sentimental and compassionate towards other animals, especially those whom he did not know. It was believed that this was how it should be, and they were supposed to die as well, well, nothing else. The penguin drank lemonade from pears, scratched his flippers with his beak, and shouted obscene words, the most vile words that could be in the world:

“You are all shit!”, “No one will save you, the world is doomed!”, “Death to all shells!”, “Sneaky squirrels have seized power!”, “Coronavirus is a stream of 5G networks!”. Of course, there was nothing wrong with that, but the penguin really wanted to believe that he was a very bad penguin. He's royal. Only he had not seen the king for a long time, who knows where this king is now. The king penguin was without his king, a hermit, unnecessary. Since he flew away, although he never saw the king, but everyone shouted to him about it, he considered himself the most beautiful bird in the entire earthly strip of the milky river.

Look, the king penguin is flying! shouted people, orangutans and koalas. The penguin turned around, bitch at them, and flew away. So they need. He fed them, and was pleased with himself.

- I'm completely free! shouted the penguin, hiding behind a cloud.

Another strange animal lived in those parts, his name was a kangaroo, he always liked to jump over stones, climb trees and chirp. He chirped, Mom, don't worry. Nightingales, thrushes, gulls, bees flew to his tweets, and let's, as they say, fuck him with rocks, stools, zebra babies and the bones of an old man who drank milk nearby - until he, a kangaroo, fell off a tree and ran away to cry in a cave where he huddled in a corner and trembled. Indians have long known that it is best not to tweet when not asked. Once, being on the verge of life and death, the "Fat walrus" tweeted that all the same birds had flown in and given him, in common people - pi @ dy and the will to run, then the "walrus" did not eat for a week, and he had strength he was not there, but after eating a couple of pi @ duley, he immediately gained strength. They say the Indians still do this when they're hungry. That's where all the legends end. Rarely, of course, rarely, often it would still be, the birds eat the Indians themselves. I remember that myths circulated from mouth to mouth that a thrush, lonely and hungry, killed seven virgin girls of fifty years old in his lifetime, raping their brains, and not only, but also other holes that he found. This time, I believe, screaming in my ear, the brains leaked out, and then he ate the poor, young, completely helpless girls. And when there was no food left at all, he built nests in his stomach. Tweeted until the morning, until the doctors arrived - woodpeckers. The woodpecker did not particularly like the thrush, he tore out the ribs from the corpse, and pierced the woodpecker through and through, put it on himself, and pretended to be a woodpecker. In his mind he was a woodpecker, but according to custom, not at all. But all doctors knew where a person or animal was suffering, and woodpeckers immediately flew there. So, this thrush flew in first and ate the poor things. But these are only legends, whether it actually happened, the survivors will not say. I myself found out about this by chance, thank all the animals, especially the lion, that he ate me first when this thrush attacked my friend and raped him and killed him. And I'm safe inside the lion. I'm here cleaning his stomach, cleaning, sweeping, taking out the garbage through the hatch in the back. However, nothing special. Everyone cleans up where they live, since ancient times it has been so. So I became the last witness to the crimes of the bird. They say he hired the mafia to find me, invited gangsters from all over the world and promised them untold wealth. I take out the garbage through the hatch at the back. However, nothing special. Everyone cleans up where they live, since ancient times it has been so. So I became the last witness to the crimes of the bird. They say he hired the mafia to find me, invited gangsters from all over the world and promised them untold wealth. I take out the garbage through the hatch at the back. However, nothing special. Everyone cleans up where they live, since ancient times it has been so. So I became the last witness to the crimes of the bird. They say he hired the mafia to find me, invited gangsters from all over the world and promised them untold wealth.

On the other side, in Eskimosia, whales lived in huge yurts and needles. Their world was strange, but entertaining. It was interesting that here, the yurts were under water, over a kilometer long, like, even to say, a hotel for underwater inhabitants. Of course, at first people lived there, still on the surface, when all this was, until somehow, the Kraken hit his head on the island, and the island stood upside down and turned over. The bottom became the top, the top became the bottom. However, nothing really has changed, still! A little more, it could have changed. So, whales lived in that igloo, those whales were artists, they smeared the paint from the backside of squids with their tail and drew the most beautiful patterns. On that day, in a strange way, a boy rose from the bottom, not at all the way we used to see him. The lightning bolt scar alone distinguished him from the whales, he himself was a whale, one might say, just like a toy that was extinguished for seven nights on fire, and fried in acid for thirteen. He called himself a sorcerer, and how, by God, I pray with all my heart that they don’t execute me for this, he will wave his fin at the pictures, they immediately became alive, and you could go inside the work of art. If the whales had not seen all this themselves, they would have considered it magic!

Yes, this is just the beginning. It turned out that the whale painted a picture, and in that picture, behind a rock of shells, there was this boy, he somehow created a passage in the picture, returned from the bottom and revived himself. How! There was also a ship, strange though, with tentacles, they were spinning like fans and blowing beauty over the mast of the ship. The ship glowed, so much so that a Christmas holiday was invented on that day. Well, isn't it a miracle? Of course, it seems to you that you do not understand anything here, I assure you, many do not understand what is happening at all. The whales themselves clap themselves with an oar, laugh like damned ones, and then, they remember that this is how it should really be. After all, they should not be alive, it was not supposed to be like that. But glad, of course, that they are alive, however. Not only did they know how to think, but such a strange misfortune was added, they experienced pain and compassion, cried sand, and suffered. They suffered especially when, and they are already very intelligent, they could not sit on human toilets, they cried there for days, sometimes even a week! Who made them so reasonable, and invented shame for them, because before, as it was, you swim for yourself, swim and defecate, and here, you see, your conscience torments you that they pollute the water. Like, breathing feces is harmful to the body. And suddenly it began to concern them, after a thousand years of poop in the sea, well, how is it at all. But, on the other hand, it should have been. He made them reasonable, and therefore they used their gifts. conscience torments that they pollute the water. Like, breathing feces is harmful to the body. And suddenly it began to concern them, after a thousand years of poop in the sea, well, how is it at all. But, on the other hand, it should have been. He made them reasonable, and therefore they used their gifts. conscience torments that they pollute the water. Like, breathing feces is harmful to the body. And suddenly it began to concern them, after a thousand years of poop in the sea, well, how is it at all. But, on the other hand, it should have been. He made them reasonable, and therefore they used their gifts.

Of course, they came up with them like that, whether the gods, but who knows, they themselves did not know about it, evolution, for sure. Yes, but they couldn’t take it like that and immediately realize that they are just tons of texts on paper, and there is no world at all. But they lived, did not suspect that the pawns in the game of words, some kind of puppets. But they were more alive than many. One of them, Kitrisius, a sea hermit, a genius in their world, created an airplane, thousands of meters from the Leaning Towers of Pisa, they sat on them and soared high into the clouds, across the oceans out to the penguins. Their tongues dangled from their mouths, rejoicing as if they had filtered water for their aquarium. Soared up to the clouds, and there they remained to live. There is plenty of water here, one might say, like in the ocean. The whales jumped off the plane, it exploded from below, killed a dozen dwarfs that drew a map of the evil kingdom for Snow White, and floated there, rejoicing in new adventures. It was rare to see two whales, they kept screaming, ringing, buzzing like a steamboat, and hiding near the sunset, and at dawn, they hung on the clouds and watched the sun rise high up. They somehow even tried to fly to the sun, but fell back into the clouds, bounced off and flopped on their belly. A flock of penguins would pick them up and turn them over so that their eyes would not pop out of their foreheads, but how could it be otherwise. This is what happens when you try to reach places where it is not supposed to reach at all. bounced off and flopped on their belly. A flock of penguins would pick them up and turn them over so that their eyes would not pop out of their foreheads, but how could it be otherwise. This is what happens when you try to reach places where it is not supposed to reach at all. bounced off and flopped on their belly. A flock of penguins would pick them up and turn them over so that their eyes would not pop out of their foreheads, but how could it be otherwise. This is what happens when you try to reach places where it is not supposed to reach at all.

Parrots also flew, only, unlike the whales that tried to soar above all, the parrots liked to build their houses on the ground, especially in the jungle, below the rest. They fought anacondas, twisted their heads, bit off their tongues, and then pretended to be anacondas themselves, inviting newly hatched babies to eat them. The parrot was not loved by everyone because he often was not himself. By themselves, their peculiarity did not help them. To know a special self, a parrot, and by whom it was created, was not enough brains. Therefore, he searched for himself in many other sounds of the worlds and the jungle. Once, flying up to his house, collectors - a gorilla and a buffalo - were waiting for him, because the turtle did not pay the bills for the grass at bungalow number seven, which he took out on credit. Since the only one who was closest, a parrot, of course, a confidant, was obliged to pay the bills. The parrot was not afraid at all, he pretended to be a dog, and the collectors immediately left, apologizing, because they were looking for a turtle, and did not recognize the dog in the parrot. This multi-colored bird beetle was cunning, every now and then deceived even the gods. He shouted that he was Poseidon, and spat with two wings, forming a tsunami for all the beetles under the tree. Of course, while sleeping.

Once, for the umpteenth time, how many more there will be, for the sake of everything ripe, cockatoos and flamingos came to his house, oh, they were handsome, they were so pink, yellow, the peacock would envy, and demanded a place for privacy from the parrot. Just think, love and all things are so birdlike, he gave them a place, in a hollow, in his own house, so elegant, green, trinkets everywhere. Flamingos and cockatoos came in and retired. Give, I think, the parrot says to himself, I'll watch the show, the first time this has happened in his life, maybe he will learn something. And he sees the following: “Flamingos and cockatoos are sitting and smoking. Yes, not so hot, but a banana, without fire, is swallowed and put out of the mouth. A parrot flew up with a roar of a lion, scared away the birds, they immediately laid an egg, and demanded a share of their fortune. Well, what is this state, they are birds. And they coughed, took out a couple of gold coins, a ring and a necklace, gave it to a parrot. The parrot loves everything colored and glittery. In a word, only they mentioned that the parrot would not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. so that the parrot does not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. so that the parrot does not tell other animals about their game with the cockatoo. The parrot promised, of course, and five minutes after they left, he blabbed everything. And now everyone wanted to blow bananas. Yes, some, in general, you know, in addition to the backside, they did not have a mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. apart from the backside and had no mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. Banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them. apart from the backside and had no mouth, but they also wanted to blow. So they blew until all the monkeys became extinct. They ate nothing but a banana, poor macaques really. And there is something that already someone, somewhere and somewhere, ate, well, it’s not here. The monkeys were proud. So they died, and were listed in the black book. Blacker was only the throat, where the bananas with the peel were doomed to disappear. The banana has become a scarcity in the world. Black markets sold fresh, but there was no way to get them.

Even in those jungles there lived a hippopotamus, only the island of Madagascar was fatter than it. Well, he was and was, what's wrong with that, isn't it. And he dived into the swamp, and flew out of the black hole in space, and again flew into the black hole, and, with his mouth open, jumped back through the swamp. He was an astronomer, he studied the stars around the earth. He saw, of course, not very well, because he wore glasses. He stuck them right into his eye like lenses. And who taught him to wear them, no one, he himself learned. Since then, he saw many stars, but his paws were not the same, and so be the case, he got himself lapwings, small birds that recorded the cosmic world according to them. Hippo said:

- Round, white!

Lapwing spelled round white. Put a white dot.

— Black everywhere! - jumping out of the swamp, the beast whispered, and flew away again.

Chibis wrote:

— White, everywhere black around. Round. You are. Dot.

He did so many dots that all the whites were white, all the round ones were round, and they had no names. But then, looking at night, and comparing the stars on the sheet with the stars in the sky, the hippo nodded that the lapwing wrote down correctly to every point.

- White and round.

Crocodiles lived in the desert. They are doctors, after all, they helped any dying person. When patients came to him with a complaint, the crocodile nodded importantly and said that there was always a way out. Swallowed them. And the patients didn't get sick anymore.

Even real centaurs flew in the sky, a mixture of not a person, but a lion, a giraffe and a rooster. They were very beautiful too. The tail of a lion, the mane of a lion, the neck of a giraffe and the body of a rooster, and the beak. He could fly, of course, so-so, but he crowed beautifully. When he did this, all the animals immediately fell unconscious. It was from fear, or from what else, who knows, after that they did not wake up to find out what a wonderful voice that beast possessed. Therefore, selling earplugs, the jerboa has become a real oligarch of the animal world, and the richest animal in the entire planet. Of course, you should not believe these tales, but that's the way it is. For them, the world ended where they lived.

At seven o'clock in the afternoon, when the space leeches that fed on thunderstorms crawled out of the sky, the desert was already dry, like the skin of an old grandmother of a rattlesnake. Rattlesnakes spit sand, and their eyes saw pixels. Space leeches loved to hurt, and instead of blood they ate clouds. They fed on lightning and became more dangerous themselves, let's just say, save our souls, save our asses, monsters that killed whales. Whales are harmless, why do this, so we didn’t understand it either. But the leeches were poisoned later. Pegasi knew their stuff, they burped magic, and since there was no grass in the sky, they ate leeches instead of everything. The more they ate them, the faster and faster they became. Soon, leeches are completely gone, they say, occasionally you can hear how Pegasus neighs, sweeping the farm yard where they breed them, and eat only on especially difficult days. Leeches, they like piranhas, they jump out of their enclosures, pegasuses immediately eat them. Then the brain of them, of space creatures, let's say, developed by watching their relatives die. They got smarter. One of the leeches, there is such a myth, walks on the head of a mighty Pegasus, eats lightning, and shares them with him. It's up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I'm afraid to look at the sky, it's very dangerous, and I haven't seen clouds for a long time, and I haven't seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. in space creatures, say, developed by watching their relatives die. They got smarter. One of the leeches, there is such a myth, walks on the head of a mighty Pegasus, eats lightning, and shares them with him. It's up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I'm afraid to look at the sky, it's very dangerous, and I haven't seen clouds for a long time, and I haven't seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. in space creatures, say, developed by watching their relatives die. They got smarter. One of the leeches, there is such a myth, walks on the head of a mighty Pegasus, eats lightning, and shares them with him. It's up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I'm afraid to look at the sky, it's very dangerous, and I haven't seen clouds for a long time, and I haven't seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. and share them with him. It's up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I'm afraid to look at the sky, it's very dangerous, and I haven't seen clouds for a long time, and I haven't seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. and share them with him. It's up to you to believe it or not, but sometimes I'm afraid to look at the sky, it's very dangerous, and I haven't seen clouds for a long time, and I haven't seen thunderstorms since the creation of spacecraft. There are only two of them, one for a jaguar, the other for a person. A jaguar is watching on his Netflix from the future, and a man is trying to fly to the moon to leave a trail. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. to leave a mark. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him. to leave a mark. Only all the time somewhere the fuel disappears. And this, it turns out, the raccoon drinks all the fuel. Only he became invisible, because he mutated, because the person still could not find him.

By the way, did you know that the first flight to the moon belonged to a bat? I'm telling.

One day, a centaur chased after him, and the bat got so scared that it broke the sound barrier and flew out into space, and hid on the dark side of the moon. Since then, this mouse has only been living there, because all the others are no longer at all in the world, they are hiding in more visible, but already known places. Delicacies from them, of course, are so-so, but for lovers of meat on the bones, this is a real delicacy. That mouse, occasionally crying, looks at the ground and wipes his eyes with a wing, because his favorite playstation five, on which he loved to play battlefield five, remained there. He wipes his beads and cannot believe that he worked two years for nothing in the firm of his goat friend, only to lose everything like that when the magic began to seep into his house. But in one, of course, he was lucky, no doubt, his eyes saw like binoculars, no, more precisely, as he himself repeatedly repeated, telescope, he looked at libraries with them and read books, straight from the moon. That's how easily he managed to learn everything, and create a house on the moon, grow food. He even created living organisms, because there were no females. Of course, he did not build a rocket, but still, he managed to make a space backpack. And even a helmet. He put them on and flew off to other worlds, planets, and looked for others, the same as himself. After all, he could not believe that all bats are alone in the universe. Well, it can't be like that. He flew for a long time, once again overcoming the sound barrier, and his sound barrier turned into a light one. And in just a week, he got to another galaxy. Here a surprise awaited him... because there were no females. Of course, he did not build a rocket, but still, he managed to make a space backpack. And even a helmet. He put them on and flew off to other worlds, planets, and looked for others, the same as himself. After all, he could not believe that all bats are alone in the universe. Well, it can't be like that. He flew for a long time, once again overcoming the sound barrier, and his sound barrier turned into a light one. And in just a week, he got to another galaxy. Here a surprise awaited him... because there were no females. Of course, he did not build a rocket, but still, he managed to make a space backpack. And even a helmet. He put them on and flew off to other worlds, planets, and looked for others, the same as himself. After all, he could not believe that all bats are alone in the universe. Well, it can't be like that. He flew for a long time, once again overcoming the sound barrier, and his sound barrier turned into a light one. And in just a week, he got to another galaxy. Here a surprise awaited him... and his sound barrier turned into a light barrier. And in just a week, he got to another galaxy. Here a surprise awaited him... and his sound barrier turned into a light barrier. And in just a week, he got to another galaxy. Here a surprise awaited him...

This is not worth talking about here, all sorts of dangerous contractors are watching my every word to find a bat. They've even set up an account for those who can get their hands on the very last living scientist bat. All the riches of the earth, and even the neighboring planet, were promised. Therefore, I won’t lie, but I can’t say in which galaxy the mouse is now. Silent-silent. But know one thing, he found something important, very significant, even more expensive than the reward announced for him. So it goes.

But about the engineer's mole, I can tell you one interesting thing. Just imagine how this mole, in a few days, managed not only to open a short wormhole into the portal to the other side of the earth, that’s how they later began to call it, by the way, and so ... it means that he opened this amazing hole, and what do you think? All the animals of the world mixed up and moved into his world, wolves, Amur tigers, pandas, wolverines, snakes ... For the snakes, of course, the mole was happy, he hadn’t eaten his favorite food for a long time, and this is his food, so to speak since then favorite. No one has seen this engineer, but every week, amazing things happen all over the planet. Either a dinosaur falls from the clouds, then a Mammoth lives on the street, and a prehistoric man produces fire in a cave. Recently, huge rabbit centipedes jumped out of the ground, and instead of dragons, pterodactyls began to fly - without a scarf and handkerchiefs. The frogs are now afraid to go outside, they say they are afraid of dragonflies and flies that have become the size of a bull. Oh, fathers, sparrows! Could such a tiny mole have been able to open a gap between time and space.

Once, he even got into Einstein's room and stole his sandwich from there. When Einstein noticed the hole, the mole waved its paw at him and smiled. After the sandwich is lost, Einstein looks for a way to get it back. Since then, the scientist's hair, rumor has it, never obeys him from shock, even glue did not help, and scissors broke. And once, walking through the holes, the mole went into Lermontov's room when he was reading a letter from Mendeleev. Seeing him, Lermontov curled up on the floor and asked him not to tell anyone about love with the old man. After all, he was ten years older than Mendeleev, and with such a big difference in age, marriage was not allowed and they were executed if they found out. The mole smiled, scratched his head, and then changed the channel. He fell for a long time, maybe an hour or five minutes, there really is no time here. He got to Elizabeth II, she neighed like a horse, that she began to turn into a horse, her hooves and tail grew. Immediately the mole ran away from there. He didn't particularly like horses. And once in the room of Leonardo da Vinci and Galileo, the mole could sit here for months, watching new discoveries. Then he flew away, wiping his eyes with a handkerchief, because he would miss them very much. And once, he got into the magical world, they confused the mole with a glass and kissed him on the mouth, trying to drink wine. The mole also does not like magic anymore. He almost choked, and something flew in his stomach. It was anthrax. If you start an ulcer, a "stranger" could grow. I had to tinker and fly into the future for a cure. Hire the Terminator and Predator to escort you to other worlds. the mole could sit here for months, watching new discoveries. Then he flew away, wiping his eyes with a handkerchief, because he would miss them very much. And once, he got into the magical world, they confused the mole with a glass and kissed him on the mouth, trying to drink wine. The mole also does not like magic anymore. He almost choked, and something flew in his stomach. It was anthrax. If you start an ulcer, a "stranger" could grow. I had to tinker and fly into the future for a cure. Hire the Terminator and Predator to escort you to other worlds. the mole could sit here for months, watching new discoveries. Then he flew away, wiping his eyes with a handkerchief, because he would miss them very much. And once, he got into the magical world, they confused the mole with a glass and kissed him on the mouth, trying to drink wine. The mole also does not like magic anymore. He almost choked, and something flew in his stomach. It was anthrax. If you start an ulcer, a "stranger" could grow. I had to tinker and fly into the future for a cure. Hire the Terminator and Predator to escort you to other worlds. If you start an ulcer, a "stranger" could grow. I had to tinker and fly into the future for a cure. Hire the Terminator and Predator to escort you to other worlds. If you start an ulcer, a "stranger" could grow. I had to tinker and fly into the future for a cure. Hire the Terminator and Predator to escort you to other worlds.

But the Gorgon, already seven years retired, the snakes have withered, covered with dust, withering, no strength. But that's not the point. Here she has a bed, she left the room where she stands a long time ago, but everything is not just like that, you understand. Little people live in that bed, if you can’t see them that way, but if you zoom in through a microscope, a hundred thousand people are running around there, with maps and tools, building houses, inventing rockets and airplanes, building machines and firms. Once the Gorgon slept here, but at one fine moment, something began to prick her in the side. Something stuck on her. She got up, believe it or not, and noticed some kind of needle. I tried to pull it out, the whole bed was raised. And it turned out to be a skyscraper of these people. Up to the sky. How and who built it, there is no idea, but Gorgon feels that the magic of the great sorcerers and black druids is involved here. One of them just once disarmed her. People themselves do not yet fully understand where they are and who they are. But they are developing. For them, the whole bed is a huge galaxy. Someday they will definitely break out of there or create magnifying rays, but then, all of you are praying here, there are millions of them, or maybe trillions, if they become large, Saturn will not be enough for them. Therefore, the Gorgon keeps the room closed, you never know, albeit cramped, but not offended. What tightness can we talk about, by the way, when they do not even know about the existence of this world. He sprinkles them with salt so that they do not deteriorate, and sometimes he throws memes into the room so that development ceases to be. Someday they will definitely break out of there or create magnifying rays, but then, all of you are praying here, there are millions of them, or maybe trillions, if they become large, Saturn will not be enough for them. Therefore, the Gorgon keeps the room closed, you never know, albeit cramped, but not offended. What tightness can we talk about, by the way, when they do not even know about the existence of this world. He sprinkles them with salt so that they do not deteriorate, and sometimes he throws memes into the room so that development ceases to be. Someday they will definitely break out of there or create magnifying rays, but then, all of you are praying here, there are millions of them, or maybe trillions, if they become large, Saturn will not be enough for them. Therefore, the Gorgon keeps the room closed, you never know, albeit cramped, but not offended. What tightness can we talk about, by the way, when they do not even know about the existence of this world. He sprinkles them with salt so that they do not deteriorate, and sometimes he throws memes into the room so that development ceases to be.

Here Pinocchio, once, for the sake of all good things, noticed that, taking scissors in his hands and playing with him just like that, he breaks the matter of time and space. The frail boy did not immediately notice this, only partly due to the fact that he saw the whole of reality. Sheets and rolls of space fell into his lap, torn and crumbled in the air, and he realized that the air was not air. That all the air is actually the universe, but someone else's it, those who lived in it. The planets crashed against the waves, rolled out of their orbits and flew down into his lap. That is why the inhabitants of those galaxies and planets also died. The boy no longer cuts the air with scissors, but looks for people, looking at the air, in order to save them and transfer them to a flask where no one will cut them. But the air was endless, and the unknown galaxy, even more. He breathed them. Of course, for those residents until they die and are sucked into the boy, many million years will pass, but still, it’s bad to die, as Pinocchio believed. And then he stopped trying. Everything was arranged in such a way that it was so. And saving is not his task. After all, someone is also breathing them right now, and someone is also cutting their universe with scissors. He thought about it for a long time, that he fell out of the world and ended up in a mental hospital for his stupid theories. But here there was room for him. By swallowing sedatives, he could communicate with people from that planet. They looked at him and were surprised, asked questions, and the boy answered. Everyone around thought he was crazy, and he was the simplest boy who was just the first to see that world. When asked what he sees, he answered universes, time and space. You’re lying, they answered him, but he doesn’t, look, the boy repeated. The nose didn't grow. He definitely didn't cheat. But people did not know that his nose grew from lying. So the boy lives there until now. Rotting. Doctors pour water on him to keep him from lying, and he couldn't tell the truth, which was the truth. For the truth, he was watered even more. The boards on the leg immediately swelled, an allergic reaction of Pinocchio's body began. He began to age and wrinkle, rot, turning into dust.

The penguin scratched the back of his head and jumped down. The clouds are fluffy, like I don’t know what, they haven’t come up with such a word yet. The penguin brushed his hair back, climbed out of the water, played with the muscles on his chest, and winked at the seagull that he was free at any time if she wanted to have some fun. The seagull didn't mind, of course. The bird also loved to fly, but today it ate a lot of fish to fly. The penguin gave a disdainful look and dived back until he ran into a shark. The shark wore glasses and taught fish, jellyfish, skates, rays new rules of arithmetic. When she saw the penguin, she waved her flipper and said to wait. Approaching the winged bird, she coughed up the South Ocean crucian, and the penguin, patting her on the back, swam away.

Thor drank ale at three o'clock in the morning. This happens after a long fight with the condors from the cave of Triaascal. Condors are not less than ten meters, the beak is made of diamond, the stomach is made of titanium, and the wingspan reaches forty meters. Thor fought with him for a long time, until one of them offered a draw, that was the condor, but Thor, he, after all, a god, cannot draw with the monster, therefore he deceived him, saying well, and hit him in his most vulnerable place fist, on the little finger on the right leg. From pain, his beak crumbled, his titanium belly flattened out, and his wings fell off, and he became a plucked chicken.

Here, among other things, on this peach, of course, people also lived, well, how could it be without them. Magic has no place to be without them, after all, for their sake, it was created. Only now, science has long passed and managed to penetrate into the minds of many inhabitants of the planet that magic, in fact, was not necessary in order to be able to control everyone on earth. With one bomb, a person could kill pointwise any, let's say, one species. They set the timers of small nano atoms to look like an animal, and all these atoms found any kind, wherever they lived, passed through walls, universes, water, found all, of course, earthly ones, and tore them apart from the inside with an explosion. Therefore, the monsters themselves did not go out against these monsters, and even the gods, whom people considered immortal, turned out to be mortal when Athena died from such a bomb, when she decided to kill the president of the land. Since then, here, every man for himself. Such are the things. Going through this topic does not make any sense at all, you have known them for a long time, you are people yourself, and you yourself have seen those devices for a long time. Truly deadly and scary.

Among other things, in this world, the land where such beautiful creatures live, well, it can’t be otherwise, I think there are even more amazing monsters - these are jellyfish that play golf sitting on Jupiter, play with the moons, I don’t know what , trying to hit white holes, holes in space. But after all, the moons must always be in their places, in their universes, only because they are white, and not others, so that through the black ones they can fall back under their paws and tentacles. Oh, these jellyfish, there is no use for them, but if you notice, trouble will happen, you will sting, you will die immediately, they throw the planets high up, maybe down, who knows, space never had directions, and they throw them into the hole, with a tentacle strike . Planets, moons, they all roll across the field, and then they are grabbed by tiny, but equally agile lemurs, they throw them into the ring of Saturn, playing basketball, And how happy they are when they hit. They beat each other for joy. Those planets quickly return back, rolling into place, like on a pool table, and, of course, it happens that lemurs are greedy, jellyfish have to fight with them on their fists. Of course, there can be no talk of any jellyfish fists. It could not, but here everything is arranged differently, alas, because the jellyfish itself, if you look, has a real fist. One blow is enough, it used to be for a lemur to die. there is a real fist. One blow is enough, it used to be for a lemur to die. there is a real fist. One blow is enough, it used to be for a lemur to die.

In the kitchen, in a house on the outskirts of the forest, a guy was sitting, an ordinary person, but he had kilograms of sweets in his closet. Only these sweets were not at all simple, but magical. Anyone who ate them immediately became a robot. And all because demons lived inside sweets, they seduced and invited people to eat them, and then they themselves ate people from the inside, built real mechanisms, frames there, and turned human skin into a robot. As real, there are legends that even the robot itself does not know that he is a robot, because the memories are alive. In a small box, the demons store the brain, protect it, and, depending on the need, rebuild it and introduce their memories. It happens that they go to hell in this body to assure people that there is a way out, to give them hope, and then, insidiously and cruelly, speak the truth, showing themselves. Immediately the man suffered even more,

In Siberia, well, where else could they be, if not there, lived snowmen the size of a mountain. And the Yeti lived with them there, a huge enormous hairy man, there was only hair on the body, only two eyes and sticking out, glowing under the moon. They played building house with the snowman and threw lances. The peaks reached, almost to the height of a tree near the mountain, and, only as tall as a car, a Yeti. They rushed like this until the morning came, and in the morning, of course, they always slept so that people would not notice them. When you look from below, you can see two huge caves, these are not caves at all, but the eyes of the mountain, but people do not see all this, because the mountain knows how to hide itself very well. Yeti, in order not to get caught, will dig out a norm for himself in the snow, climb into it, and sleep until evening, and wake up from the cold. He raises his head, and there is a blizzard. It hits him from side to side like a European flag, and he is holding on to a Christmas tree, and yelling at the mountain to give a hand, but the mountain is much larger, does not hear, the snow has laid his ears. So the Yeti flew far, far away, made a circle around the mountain seven times, and fell again into the snow. He used to fly across the sky, Crows and Penguins would fly in, sit on his back, and sleep while he was flying. And once, it was two or three days, a huge sea turtle crawled out from under the water, and shouted to the Crows to tie a rope to the Yeti. And the turtle flew from below, because it also always dreamed of flying, only it was very big, and therefore sometimes jumped up to overcome at least a hundred meters. Because the Yeti was a kite. He used to fly across the sky, Crows and Penguins would fly in, sit on his back, and sleep while he was flying. And once, it was two or three days, a huge sea turtle crawled out from under the water, and shouted to the Crows to tie a rope to the Yeti. And the turtle flew from below, because it also always dreamed of flying, only it was very big, and therefore sometimes jumped up to overcome at least a hundred meters. Because the Yeti was a kite. He used to fly across the sky, Crows and Penguins would fly in, sit on his back, and sleep while he was flying. And once, it was two or three days, a huge sea turtle crawled out from under the water, and shouted to the Crows to tie a rope to the Yeti. And the turtle flew from below, because it also always dreamed of flying, only it was very big, and therefore sometimes jumped up to overcome at least a hundred meters. Because the Yeti was a kite.

Dwarfs always said:

“It takes three gnomes to get a light bulb!” - but each of them tried, but their height was still not enough to the ceiling, - So ten! - but even ten did not reach the light bulb, and it was necessary to screw it in, so they called a man into the hut. The man helped, but leaving, he said:

- It's good that you called me, you are too small, even together, you have a hundred thousand dollars.

Well, they gave him the gold of a leprechaun, and agreed on that. Thumbelina came, put two chairs, unscrewed the light bulb and said that warm light was needed here, for comfort.

Can you imagine how many stars there are in the sky, how a dragon floats across the galaxy, spewing marmalade from its mouth, how a rabbit flies in a balloon, singing Philip Kirkorov, and somewhere on Pluto, there lives a mosquito that can compose galaxies. The mosquito comes out onto the veranda, and, waving its trunk, begins to create new galaxies and planets. On one, a mosquito created giants that ate only small mushrooms, and on the other, a Hedgehog that could dance break dance and make ice out of sand. On its planet, the mosquito wanted nothing more than a tank of donated blood and a couple of secluded, dark places. But one day he got bored, he waved his magic trunk, created a cruiser and went to the created galaxy, only fell out of the cruiser along the way, because he forgot about the toothy pikes that swam through space and ate everything.

- What if everyone lives in a tea leaf? - the moth thought, eating out a fur coat with a friend, - Imagine that this is space, and planets are scattered there! There are butterflies, and flies, and lizards, even people!

- Marvelous! the friend agreed.

“Here, in a tea leaf,” he said, “the same Tim lives like you, a little moth, even smaller than you and me,” taking a leaf out of his pocket, “maybe he’s even your little clone, and also eats a fur coat, only a lot long years ago.

- Cool!

“And don’t say, but they don’t even know that it’s hot on the planet for them, because we boil them and eat them in a cup and teapot.

- Like this?

- You put it in the water, and everyone drowns there and dies. They swell, the planets become doughnuts, big as if they took water in their mouths.

- Ah, got it.

“Yeah, and I thought you were always stupid. Turns out you're even dumber than I thought.

They ate, but Henry's moth continued to occasionally examine the leaf, whispering to them that he saved their universe, and put it in his pocket. Then the closet opened and they flew out, but the fly swatter took them out and smeared them on the wall. So it happens, people often also missed a stop on buses, talking about something distant. So the moths did not notice the danger, only at the last moment. He became the last one.

Imagine a sock on the floor, stick your foot in, and there ... but everything is in order. This sock is not at all ordinary, but a real magic sock. When a person puts them on, he immediately enters another world. There were werewolves and vampires, they are at war. Van Helsing also got here, from there he pulled out several werewolves, and they took over his world. But Helsing was the coolest of all, because he himself became one, returning to the past and being born a Lycan. He kept a secret within himself with the sign of Baphomet, which held back his rage and transformation. When the time came, he became a werewolf the size of a dachshund and flew south because there were no werewolves. They were not there, except that the magic was strange there. Climbing the highest mountain on Olympus, Helsing noticed that a new werewolf grows from every hair that falls out. He never wanted to be a father, but who chooses that was the purpose. They also need to be fed. Therefore, he raised more werewolves, and until they were formed, he gave children to eat for his children. Yes, they themselves could make children and eat. Children ate their children's children. And Helsing decided that enough was enough from him, and flew back to the sock, climbed into the past and was born a man. Immediately all the werewolves perished on that mountain.

Freddy Krueger always had three sheets of drawings hanging in his room. He was afraid to pick them up, because there were other worlds behind the picture. One of them contained his fears, the most hidden ones. Spinners. He was always afraid to try to twist them on his finger, because the claws got in the way, and when they fell, Freddie's lips twisted and he felt embarrassed, because even children knew how to twist them. Therefore, he began to kill the sleeping ones, until they learned how to twist them, disgracing him. There was plenty of fear. For example, Olga Buzova. When Kruger crawled towards her, trying to get into her head in her dream, he fell into purgatory, there was nothing but emptiness and longing. There were no dreams or thoughts. Even the memories were nowhere. Krueger huddled in a corner and cried, tore at himself the last hairs that had survived after the fire under the sole of his left foot, between the little finger and the ring finger. Purgatory didn't answer. So it was before the creation of the big bang, nothing else. Also empty and lonely. In hope, by no means, who knows. But... Krueger began to see lights, it was his eyes that were looking for light in the darkness. Krueger himself tried to sleep, to see his dream, to get into his head, but he could not. It seemed to him that he closed his eyes, and someone kept them open. Freddy did not see him, and ran into the darkness screaming for rescue. But no matter how much he ran, someone kept holding his eyelids all the time and did not let him sleep. Buzova's strength had no boundaries, Fredd had no control over her. This was a real prison. to get inside my head, but I couldn't. It seemed to him that he closed his eyes, and someone kept them open. Freddy did not see him, and ran into the darkness screaming for rescue. But no matter how much he ran, someone kept holding his eyelids all the time and did not let him sleep. Buzova's strength had no boundaries, Fredd had no control over her. This was a real prison. to get inside my head, but I couldn't. It seemed to him that he closed his eyes, and someone kept them open. Freddy did not see him, and ran into the darkness screaming for rescue. But no matter how much he ran, someone kept holding his eyelids all the time and did not let him sleep. Buzova's strength had no boundaries, Fredd had no control over her. This was a real prison.

Behind the second drawing was his least favorite lesson. Physics. He couldn't understand what it meant to change the laws of the universe. The teacher told him that it was impossible to get into a dream, when Freddie began to tell his story, then he hit him with a pointer right in the eye, in the pupil, and Krueger immediately fell silent. And it happened that the teacher would grab a stool or a desk, and how he would hit Freddie on the back, so that all the teeth flew out to the floor, where obscene gnomes and tooth fairies converged.

Behind the third drawing was the most terrible fear, but also the most beloved dream of all the dreams in his world. Kruger feared him at the same time, but also loved him. If only no one saw it. This secret cannot be told, otherwise all the monsters in the world will take up arms against him, because there is one magical sound in the world that disarms all magical and formidable creatures. Even Krueger, reading it, became a baby, a coward and a stutterer. It was pierced with a trident, and it burned on fire for ten thousand years. Therefore, he would never want to open this drawing. Therefore, he sealed it with adhesive tape and electrical tape, nailed it on top with boards. Even the Dementors would have seemed like a joke, an ordinary sheet. He could, he got this sound from the god in his head, when he was distracted, if he opens the picture, god will see him, the sound will pierce the world, and all the spells will fall from everyone, even from him. God will have to create everyone from scratch. Certainly, Freddie would like to be the only such monster, magical, but no way. Hush hush…

Let's get away from this Freddy, because other creatures have the coolest. The most amazing thing is that Gulliver, which he can have in principle, has a mirror in the room, which reduces the weight of a person. When you look at it, when you see yourself up to the chest, in reality, your lower half immediately disappears, moving into the mirror. And the mirror projects you from the mirror into reality, like a hologram. The weight of this miracle of the body, after all, has long been known, five micrograms. Gulliver is weighed every day on it, looking. It was then that Gulliver was captured by dwarfs and midgets, they covered the mirror with a veil, and Gulliver fell to the ground. He has only the upper half on the ground, and the weighty, lower one remains inside the mirror. Lilliputians beat him and beat him, because he doesn’t even have arms, everything is in the mirror, if he raised his hands when he looked, maybe the hands would be. When they get tired of beating the giant, when they eat all the food at home and rob him, steal gold and teaspoons, open the mirror and run away. The lower half flies out of the mirror and sticks to Gulliver. He gets up and starts stroking himself because it hurts. He had been beaten. He is angry, but he cannot find the midgets.

Oh, if he had a smartphone, they would help him find these midgets, because phones have already appeared unusual, which can magnetize midgets to the smartphone cover. And inside it, the hamsters of physics are pedaling, they know for sure that movement is life. When the phone turns off, they wipe off the sweat and go to sleep. Sometimes it's a whole day, sometimes it's three minutes. It's an hour, the battery needs to be filled with energy and movement. When they click on the screen, the loader inside runs and moves, rebuilds the world, the settings section, mail, and anything that a person clicks on, then the builder builds the loader.

Have you ever seen ostrich diggers? But the wasps see them every day, because they hire them to build holes for them. Real tunnels. They are even hired by ants when they do not have time to cook at home before winter. They gnaw the earth with their huge teeth, like worms, inside, shrink and spit, like plasticine and crawl. Their mouth is a bottomless well. Everything eaten flies out in another place, through a teleport, in Yakutia. The same teleport inside the ostrich. In Yakutia, I accept land and plant palm trees around yurts. They feed the elephants. Elephants eat and become even wrinkled and wiser. And then they tell everyone to feed everyone with normal food, and that all the Yakuts are fucking degenerates, dumb-nosed.

Ants themselves are ordinary, only now they keep in a cocoon not babies of ants at all, but real people. Little ones. They also suck on nipples in a cocoon, and they got here from a rocket in orbit. The nipples are from the intestines of spiders, and from the milk of a rabbit. When people go to sleep in cryosleep in their capsules, they move into the ant's cocoon, which has decreased. Back, then, as it turns out, it is impossible to return. So, among the crowd of ants, you can see a person who carries a grain of sugar on his back or pulls straw behind him to strengthen the passages to the tunnels. They swear, yell, but they do it. Let them not do it, the war ants will cut off their paws. Ants do not need weak companions. Not at all. Once, one of us here tried to build a car in order to move faster, but they immediately killed him, calling him a charlatan and a vile lazybones. Now it is forbidden to think without an order. People run and run, get tired as soon as they sit down, get a spear in the belly, and run again. Let them crawl, but do not stand still, do not create traffic jams in the tunnels with ants. There is a porter here, no, he doesn’t rape anyone here, he drags cocoons of ant people on his back to a nearby anthill, runs around like a formula one car, because he has a mutation, seven legs, the seventh on his head. He keeps hitting the ceiling with it, and his leg runs along the ceiling and pushes him back into the anthill, from where he takes the cocoons. Therefore, with his saliva, he tied this leg onto his back, and now even cocoons are better to hold on to, because there is support from below. Instead of a tail, so to speak, but he, as it were, is fine. Only one eye sometimes interferes with him when, after leaving the anthill, the sun shines into his eyes. If there were two eyes, he would close the right one from the right sun, and run with his left eye. And here, sometimes he stumbles, and a tick sticks into his eye. It is difficult to pull them out, they have twisted teeth. But if you tickle them between the legs, they let go of the eye.

They say that the leaves that fall from the side of the forest, that far behind the sun, millions of thousands of light years away, hides a planet that cannot be seen by any telescope. Aliens live there. They walk on their heads, eat with their fingers, and talk in wind dances. By their structure, they are like a thin sheet of A4, standing sideways, it is impossible to see them, but standing in front of someone, you can see their flat faces. Drawn nose, eyes and mouth. Aliens often liked to look at the stars from their planet, only they did not see the stars like we do, because the laws were different there, as if everything around was drawn with colored pencil and felt-tip pen. White unpainted dots on paper, in the blue sky, green, barely shaded trees that flew through the air, with a frequency of 2 frames per second, and animals that often fought with the winds and flew around the planet, grabbing and tearing clouds to shreds. The birds were like two sticks, flapping their wings, and fell in a minute. They could fly for barely a minute, and when it started to rain, they all hid under cover. Here the rains were stone and wet. Each of them was scarier than they could have imagined. But everything was enough, so to speak, to lie down on the ground and become flat with the earth, part of the planet, and the stones could not do any harm at all, but the rains, it was difficult to hide from them. The wet world of the aliens was becoming uninhabitable, so they invented a fan made from the skin of monsters, shredding them to ventilate the earth. than they could imagine. But everything was enough, so to speak, to lie down on the ground and become flat with the earth, part of the planet, and the stones could not do any harm at all, but the rains, it was difficult to hide from them. The wet world of the aliens was becoming uninhabitable, so they invented a fan made from the skin of monsters, shredding them to ventilate the earth. than they could imagine. But everything was enough, so to speak, to lie down on the ground and become flat with the earth, part of the planet, and the stones could not do any harm at all, but the rains, it was difficult to hide from them. The wet world of the aliens was becoming uninhabitable, so they invented a fan made from the skin of monsters, shredding them to ventilate the earth.

The ferret lived in a hole under a nuclear power plant, and never complained about the radiation. The ferret wore his fur coat with caution, but how could it be otherwise, and all because the fur coat was unimaginably predatory, every hair is worms with teeth, predatory. The worms ate the radiation itself, straight from the air and soil, tearing apart matter itself. Actually we don't know. But we will continue. When a man killed a ferret, and then the beast went out to take a pee behind the fence, after watching a cartoon; to make themselves clothes for the winter, the worms ate a man by jumping out of it. The fur coat became even fatter. Well, a worm cannot eat a hundred kilograms and not get fat. On earth, many ate one hundred grams of sweets and carried them up to two hundred kilograms. And so. The meat they ate began to mutate, and those worms turned into snakes. Tired. We fell asleep. For two years they lay swollen on the ground, cars rolled over them. The fur coat floated in a puddle towards the drainpipe, it was carried away in the claws of birds and gnawed by flies. Dogs defecated on them. Cats slept on them. Once, I remember, this fur coat was used instead of a condom by black swingers-Arabs.

The hibernation lasted only nothing, for the third year, when the homeless Ivan put it on himself, and went into the top five, the fur coat came to life and, from bewilderment, how is it, yes, I all of you ... - the fur coat ate the homeless, sellers, movers and buyers.

The ferret could not stand it, well, nothing else, you know, a fur coat kills, and she ... sits in hell for herself, playing goat with the devils. People felt sorry. Yes, and he is completely naked, it should be a shame. It all happened from the fact (maybe he would not have returned, free pudding in hell) that the devil began to go to work more and more often, to be distracted in order to torment people. So you can't play cards. Damn James, leaving the room, and coming back in about five minutes (and here one minute lasted a month), he declared to the ferret that he was tired of working. He began to complain that people were coming and coming. The devils know who died and how, so the devil James told him that it was time to return. He got fed up. The devil opened the door and kicked the ferret in the opening, the ferret tumbled, hit his head on the armature on the floor, ate a watermelon, gnawed out the baskets, did ten thousand somersaults and grabbed his fur coat, put it on, and left the store. Just before the entrance, he stopped, and a homeless man got out of his fur coat, completely alive. And all the people got out too. Then James's head popped out and said:

- Suffer on earth! - and disappeared, closing the portal. For seven more nights, the salesgirls cried to go back to hell. "Here's the hell with you!" the devil yelled as he changed channels in the cinema.

At night, one boy's toys came to life. And in the closet lived a bone man. The monster liked to come out of the closet and grabbed the boy by the leg, and terribly sentenced that he would eat him. The boy was afraid. But the toys weren’t afraid of anything, because they ran to the boy’s aid, and beat the monster either with stools, then with legs, then with a knife, and from time to time they hung him on a rope and threw him out the window. The bone man screamed, asked for mercy, then the toys dragged him back, and forced him to cook a cake so that the boy would forgive him. He baked a very tasty cake, by profession, when he was still alive, before he went to hell and became a servant of Satan, he was famous throughout France for confectionery, because he is a cook, after all. The boy found a cake on the bedside table in the morning, and thought that his mother had baked it for him. Branches beat against the glass in the room, the bone man crawled out of the closet again, took out a saw from his cloak, and wanted to cut off the boy's leg. But then Iron Man, Indiana Jones, Bruce Lee and Jackie Chan attacked him and beat him, broke his fingers and chained him to a cross, took him to the forest, and, having found a cornfield there, left him there. The bone man was shouting something, but he was not heard at all. Only the bones rumbled. There is no language. Dragons sat on him backwards, and he drowned there. Then the dragon flew away, and a cross stuck out of the back. Where this bone man is now is unknown. Maybe he will still come to the boy, but many, many years later. If he finds a way. but it was not heard at all. Only the bones rumbled. There is no language. Dragons sat on him backwards, and he drowned there. Then the dragon flew away, and a cross stuck out of the back. Where this bone man is now is unknown. Maybe he will still come to the boy, but many, many years later. If he finds a way. but it was not heard at all. Only the bones rumbled. There is no language. Dragons sat on him backwards, and he drowned there. Then the dragon flew away, and a cross stuck out of the back. Where this bone man is now is unknown. Maybe he will still come to the boy, but many, many years later. If he finds a way.

The boy got up, opened the closet, and there sat Bilbo Baggins, he twisted the ring in his palm and hissed. The boy was scared. What is his grandfather doing here? He called his mother and father. His father beat him with a closet door, put him in a garbage bag and took him to the cemetery, where he buried him. Bilbo said something, pulled his hands in a garbage bag, asked for mercy, who knows, but he is still alive. All because he put on the ring. And waiting for the kings from Sauron to find him. They will find, perhaps, but shovels will be needed. And kings never held shovels. They will sit at the tombstone and cry. Then they will go and uproot the trees, and there are goblins and trolls.

Toys, of course, the boy never saw alive. The boy was blind. But he saw the aura of sweetness. Sometimes, the boy dropped a cake on Jackie Chan, and began to see him, grabbed him, and broke his neck. Jackie Chan screamed, came to life, and beat the boy unconscious. He lifted his head and put it back on.

“If you raise your hand against me again, I know where I’ll put your head!”

The boy curled up in a corner and cried. Then the fairy godmother flew in through the window and promised to fulfill one wish. The boy smiled and wished that he had ten rubles to buy chewing gum. Then the fairy flew away, and the stupid boy was left with ten rubles.

Golden eels, too, were alive in some way. They sailed from Eldorado and settled the Atlantic Ocean. The eels enjoyed photographing landscapes, setting off fireworks, playing hide-and-seek with dolphins, and eating lost people on boats. He, as expected, loved the fishermen very much, he hunted them. He jumped into the net, and when they pulled out, rejoicing at the catch for dinner, the eel shot lightning at them, made barbecue, and sprinkled with ketchup, ate right on board the boat. He invited octopuses, squids, piranhas, sharks and plankton to the feast. SpongeBob was not invited that day, but all because he worked hard today. He washed nuclear submarines and cleaned toilets. If the eel didn't know the square, it would never recognize black Bob. Plankton was always trying to find out the secret of cooking such a tasty person, and what is included in the dish, and why it is so tasty. The eel smiled twisted his finger at his mouth, licked his nails and said that this was a secret of the company and it was protected by copyright. Only Zeus looked at it and sighed, licking his thin, dry lips. He loved barbecue, but he did not have a passport, so he had no right to go down to earth. On Olympus, no one fried it, including shish kebab. Hercules liked to eat dietary supplements and proteins. Athena ate bananas and coconut milk. Aphrodite fed on the blood of virgins. Hermes ate iron. Ares preferred wet ground. Poseidon bathed in the fountain and ate fish. Only Apollo was unlucky the most, he liked to eat the sun. And Hephaestus, the son of Zeus, sucked the flame all the time. They were not up to that, not up to human comforts and up to the cannibal eel. He loved barbecue, but he did not have a passport, so he had no right to go down to earth. On Olympus, no one fried it, including shish kebab. Hercules liked to eat dietary supplements and proteins. Athena ate bananas and coconut milk. Aphrodite fed on the blood of virgins. Hermes ate iron. Ares preferred wet ground. Poseidon bathed in the fountain and ate fish. Only Apollo was unlucky the most, he liked to eat the sun. And Hephaestus, the son of Zeus, sucked the flame all the time. They were not up to that, not up to human comforts and up to the cannibal eel. He loved barbecue, but he did not have a passport, so he had no right to go down to earth. On Olympus, no one fried it, including shish kebab. Hercules liked to eat dietary supplements and proteins. Athena ate bananas and coconut milk. Aphrodite fed on the blood of virgins. Hermes ate iron. Ares preferred wet ground. Poseidon bathed in the fountain and ate fish. Only Apollo was unlucky the most, he liked to eat the sun. And Hephaestus, the son of Zeus, sucked the flame all the time. They were not up to that, not up to human comforts and up to the cannibal eel. bathed in the fountain and ate fish. Only Apollo was unlucky the most, he liked to eat the sun. And Hephaestus, the son of Zeus, sucked the flame all the time. They were not up to that, not up to human comforts and up to the cannibal eel. bathed in the fountain and ate fish. Only Apollo was unlucky the most, he liked to eat the sun. And Hephaestus, the son of Zeus, sucked the flame all the time. They were not up to that, not up to human comforts and up to the cannibal eel.

Canned goods migrate to the island of Fiji. They have brains. The ocean brings them to the Nandi dock. Residents go out to the beach at dawn and collect them in baskets. The bodies of small people lie in the hut. They are placed in the head, closed. Children are alive. They downloaded the memory that the inhabitants of this island are their friends, they know their names, where they live and work. The residents also acted like they were their children, they knew them, they pretended and played their parts. When children became old, their brains decreased with age, at the end, after death, young people, those who had just arrived on the island, but they already had what they needed to do, they took out their brains - they folded them into a bag, put them in canned food and sent back across the ocean. At the end of the year, canned food returned with new memories. The dead bodies of the old people grew younger and became children again. Brains were placed in the same bodies into dead bodies. They lived the same life round and round. They took it out. They revived. Younger. They were dying. Stupid. But each time they had new memories. Brains, however, were also intended for those suffering from schizophrenia, Alzheimer's, psychosis - separate tin cans with a green marker. In this city, people washed the air with a mop. When they chatted with them, floors, walls and roofs grew and materialized in the place where they swept the mop. In the forest, eagle owls, owls and hawks fought in enclosures, danced the waltz and tango. The orc referee ate a rock hamburger and in forty years never stopped a fight. psychosis - separate cans with a green marker. In this city, people washed the air with a mop. When they chatted with them, floors, walls and roofs grew and materialized in the place where they swept the mop. In the forest, eagle owls, owls and hawks fought in enclosures, danced the waltz and tango. The orc referee ate a rock hamburger and in forty years never stopped a fight. psychosis - separate cans with a green marker. In this city, people washed the air with a mop. When they chatted with them, floors, walls and roofs grew and materialized in the place where they swept the mop. In the forest, eagle owls, owls and hawks fought in enclosures, danced the waltz and tango. The orc referee ate a rock hamburger and in forty years never stopped a fight.

Having crossed and climbed the tower on the neighboring island, across the ocean, you can see a walrus from the fire. He works at the lighthouse. Shows the way for ships so that they do not crash on rocks and corals. A toad was sitting nearby, which in the morning swallowed a walrus to sleep. During the day, the toad cleaned the room, mopped the floor, dusted and cooked.

The legs of chairs and tables lived on the third island. Sick and thrown out by the gods. Garbage. They jumped around the island, and loved to swim on the water, compete in speed. Some of them were surfing, some were snowboarding. Among them lived white, black, red and green legs. Yellow legs were considered to be jaundiced. The red ones were owned by a demon, a former worker of hell. Blacks tan very often. Whites worked on farms and dug holes for vegetables. The bandits were crushed into dust, into sawdust and sprinkled on the ground like fertilizer. At noon, a round board fell from the sky. All legs gathered around him. The board rolled up the mountain, where no one could jump, and proclaimed itself a god. The legs have been wearing it on their heads ever since. So they got a table. People who come to the island often like to eat on it. The legs stood straight in a row and did not move even once. A snowboard was used instead of a chair. The man became the god of the god. And the legs understood that everyone has their own god, even a person, and the god of a person.

Hats lived on the fourth island, lost in time. They burned with ice, and extinguished themselves with poems. If they stopped reading poems, they melted and died. Because the island was a real buzz. Vote. Hats often hurt. Of course, their people did not hear, neither birds nor fish. But as soon as you put them on your head, the poem echoed into your mind. The man went crazy, and his head froze. Once, one hat threw itself off a cliff into the ocean and flew to Antarctica, where she did not need to listen to the cries of colleagues and friends, and not melt. He stopped reading poetry, but due to the lack of other skills, at times he began to compose them again. The polar bear snow society saw the hat, decided to hire him, built a head that spoke the hat's thoughts through speakers, and he became Antarctica's highest paid comedian and poet, working for praise.

If you paragliding from this place, and take refuge in the library of Maximianopolis in Egypt, you can see wonders that are not found in other countries. Especially in the library of magic and sorcery. Every year people die here just because they choose the wrong books and wrong authors to read. Opening a book about the collapse of Rome, Romans with spears, swords and arrows run out of the book, tentacles the size of an airplane break out of Howard Lovecraft's Cthulhu book, and when opening literature on ghosts, Bloody Mary rips her eyes out through the reflection. Here you can burn, drown, be killed and buried alive. Maugham, when he got here lost his arm, because he studied the alligators of the prehistoric world. Ernest Hemingway burned his eyes when he saw an angel, and Dostoevsky, being here, contained a thousand souls that helped him write books. Everyone has different situations. But without a doubt, miracles were nightmarish and dangerous. Wizards escaped through the books, Voldemort tried to negotiate with the library caretaker to give him a flash drive to load his soul, but the librarian clapped his hand, and the wizard flew into the book. It was like being sucked in by a vacuum cleaner. The Snow Queen promised to kill the librarian if he did not help him, but the caretaker took out a magic wand from his bosom, which he received from a book, and waved it back into place, turning it into a bag of gelatin or a Barbie doll. Here, from time to time, animals appeared that ran along the shelves, the authors fell, opened up and the flood began, a megalodon swam out, a dragon flew out, dead samurai raged. On the one hand, a vampire, on the other, a storekeeper of memories. The caretaker at such moments had his own abilities, except for magic. Rewind button. He rewinds time grabbed the beasts and stormed out the door before they could scatter the books and cause mayhem. A hand clap would not have removed the chaos, therefore, there was nothing more wonderful than rewinding time in the magical library. The dead could be resurrected, and those who lost body parts could grow limbs. Of course, the library keeper could call the best doctor from the book, open the door to the future in order to grow legs or kidneys, remove devices from the room in the book, which would allow not to get injured. But it was not worth the risk, because the characters could kill them, seize a library, a city, a country, experiment on living people. There is always a risk, still, who would want to live all their lives in a world where everything is worse than anywhere else. Hell. there was nothing more wonderful than the rewinding of time in the magical library. The dead could be resurrected, and those who lost body parts could grow limbs. Of course, the library keeper could call the best doctor from the book, open the door to the future in order to grow legs or kidneys, remove devices from the room in the book, which would allow not to get injured. But it was not worth the risk, because the characters could kill them, seize a library, a city, a country, experiment on living people. There is always a risk, still, who would want to live all their lives in a world where everything is worse than anywhere else. Hell. there was nothing more wonderful than the rewinding of time in the magical library. The dead could be resurrected, and those who lost body parts could grow limbs. Of course, the library keeper could call the best doctor from the book, open the door to the future in order to grow legs or kidneys, remove devices from the room in the book, which would allow not to get injured. But it was not worth the risk, because the characters could kill them, seize a library, a city, a country, experiment on living people. There is always a risk, still, who would want to live all their lives in a world where everything is worse than anywhere else. Hell. remove devices from the room in the book, which would allow not to get injured. But it was not worth the risk, because the characters could kill them, seize a library, a city, a country, experiment on living people. There is always a risk, still, who would want to live all their lives in a world where everything is worse than anywhere else. Hell. remove devices from the room in the book, which would allow not to get injured. But it was not worth the risk, because the characters could kill them, seize a library, a city, a country, experiment on living people. There is always a risk, still, who would want to live all their lives in a world where everything is worse than anywhere else. Hell.

But what are we about the library and the library, right? Let's fast forward to the world of science, where a spoonful of gunpowder turned a person into someone who, in no other way, could be, the person himself wanted to turn into. The powder contained the genes of animals, and after tasting only a spoon, people turned into animals or gained their strength. Marvelous. Charles Chaplin received here the grace of a cat, and Goethe the vigilance of the mind. Bulgakov found the strength of stubbornness in himself and saw other worlds at the bottom of a cup, Dickens was rewarded with the charm of a monkey and the mind of a raven. Goyle became a hippopotamus, Marie became an eagle, Anastasia became a fox. And meanwhile, well, you can imagine, I have a hand on cutting off the ladies, the animals that tried this miraculous powder became people. They were them, of course, only now, they never learned to be people. The tigers that became Homo sapiens walked on all fours. The dogs were barking. The cats hunched over and urinated into slippers and into the corners of rooms. Eagles jumped from rooftops. Giraffes were reaching for the leaves of the trees. An animal is always an animal. A person can be taught, he thinks, and an animal is a stupid creature, it imitates the life of the jungle, more precisely, it lives according to the laws of the forest, and gives preference only to instincts. But what a fantasy, just don’t put your finger on me, the bugs didn’t become anything at all, but received only the mind of a person, and every time your eyes fell on the floor, you could see cockroaches, stag beetles running around the chair , flies and fleas. They danced, they played billiards, they threw bread crumbs into baskets of cobwebs; push-ups and pull-ups on the horizontal bars. The ants that came running last fought the spiders in the fight. Bloch had the hardest time. Stronger and larger - intelligent insects, used them instead of a soccer ball, scoring goals into impromptu goals. Then they noticed big people, and began to swear, raise their fists and tremble nervously: just so as not to be crushed. Bite them on their big toes, tear their hair from the root. Whether they wanted places, who knows. But the fighters are still those. Scream. Hysterics. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. Then they noticed big people, and began to swear, raise their fists and tremble nervously: just so as not to be crushed. Bite them on their big toes, tear their hair from the root. Whether they wanted places, who knows. But the fighters are still those. Scream. Hysterics. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. Then they noticed big people, and began to swear, raise their fists and tremble nervously: just so as not to be crushed. Bite them on their big toes, tear their hair from the root. Whether they wanted places, who knows. But the fighters are still those. Scream. Hysterics. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. as long as it doesn't get crushed. Bite them on their big toes, tear their hair from the root. Whether they wanted places, who knows. But the fighters are still those. Scream. Hysterics. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. as long as it doesn't get crushed. Bite them on their big toes, tear their hair from the root. Whether they wanted places, who knows. But the fighters are still those. Scream. Hysterics. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. The squeaky sound reached anywhere but the ears of the giants. The primates grabbed them and crushed them, and if they were lucky, they ran away, and forever shook in fear under the plinth, between carpet, carpet and linoleum. It happened that a person would see that he was an anteater in a past life, and eat all the insects. And occasionally, but so it is, people heard the squeaks of cockroaches, and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that they caught butterflies yesterday, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washbasin. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that yesterday they were catching butterflies, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washstand. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him. and listened intently to them, seating them in their palms, as they told the story that yesterday they were catching butterflies, and the day before yesterday they built a house under the washstand. The man got angry, and poisoned their entire family under him.

And on a farm near Edinburgh, the cook's cows lived, they ran to the table, cut themselves, lay down on the pan, seasoned themselves with vegetables; potatoes, carrots, onions, garlic and peas. People, meanwhile, ate, smacking their lips and saying what good cooks are. It used to happen that Monroe would come in to eat a goose stew, the rams would take out knives, cut those, marinate them in sauce, stew them in a roaster, and serve them on the table. If, however, the meat did not go well into the stomach, the goose meat pulled out its arms and pushed off the walls of the trachea to fall into the bottomless crater of acid. When people, after two, I tell you God, days, defecated, the geese flew out of the fecal ditch, regenerated back into birds, and made their way to the farms where they were killed, only to be back on the table. Imagine what self-sacrifice in the name of saving the hungry. Such would be miracles, but in Australia and Africa,

If you put on a baseball cap, the baseball cap will slide down the body, and you will disappear under it, falling into a fairy tale. And if you swing and throw yourself into the water, the baseball cap becomes a ship. If you say, casually, that you have a fat ass, you will become Kilimanjaro. Yes, yes, everything is strange, but what is strange when everything in the world is so simple. If you jump from a plane, you can see how you become a pancake, and if you lie down on the road on the highway, you can see how mincemeat is made. If you hit the rhino on the nose, you can notice that in addition to three holes, there is both the fourth and the fifth, and if you put a bandwagon of the elephant, then the Niger will not help you. Even Niger will not help Negro if Niger is fighting with a niger.

Clouds. We fly through the clouds and see unusual animals jumping outside the porthole, so unimaginably delightful, just imagine. They jump so high that they hit the moon with their heads and sing that today is a better day than yesterday, ten times better, can you imagine?

And here I presented. But not only unicorns, kangaroos and coyotes jump there, but the most unusual of them - such as centaurs, well, how could it be otherwise if they are not animals, well, people, you agree?

They jump so high that the moon trembles from a thousand heads striking it. And a huge gnome lives on that moon, this gnome was born there a long time ago, I don’t even remember what century it was - I know for sure that this gnome loves animals, so much so that he invites them to live with him, promising them delicious food and grass. In addition to the centaur and the minotaur, of course, no one agrees, but how could it be otherwise, who knows who this dwarf really is.

You sit on your chair and wonder why you looked at the sky so often and didn't see them because you were so grown up and distracted by all the nonsense around you. In an instant, you wanted to change, remembered how as a child you dreamed of becoming a dragon or an eagle, flying high up and shitting on those who were against you. Today, you left all your affairs to rest and rushed forward, through the clouds, cutting them on the plane - only you cannot fly to them, and they cannot enter the plane to you - they do not even see you, because they were not told that there are adults in the world, besides children, who can see them. They themselves saw the children and waved either their tail or their hooves and said hello to the children, accompanied them with shouts and flew away towards the sunset.

Глава 2

The children laughed and rejoiced. But there were also adult children among them, when the little ones pointed a finger at a unicorn and said how beautifully it chews a marmalade cloud, they did not see anything and simply twisted their finger around their temple and said that it was time for them to see a psychiatrist to be cured. But childhood does not need to be cured, it was childhood that gave us happiness, well, really ... Can you imagine how many adults who are unhappy because they have become adults, they are interested in money and how many people will come to dinner, how big their hall and house will be, how much acres to reach beyond the horizon of their land, that's all!

And then… the unicorns flew over the horizon, and the most fascinating animals appeared in the sky, and not even animals… fish of different sizes, perches, crucian carp, dolphins and sharks, jellyfish and killer whales swam among them, among them were stingrays and jellyfish- dwarfs, skates and a thousand more clown fish, they circled in a round dance and turned the sky into a real holiday - fireworks from them, this is the best thing the children have ever seen. And there were fireflies among them that shone, and flew up to the porthole and circled outside the window until they were called crickets, composing a song for them, come here, something cool has been prepared for you here. They flew away, followed by hummingbirds, they often liked to fly through the sky and catch these fireflies, but today was a different day - a day of piety and friendliness. These are the things that are happening in heaven, but only adults forgot a long time ago,

Somehow you may be lucky, and you will believe in miracles at the age of forty, at a hundred years, when you are still alive and your mind is not busy earning as much as possible, and achieving as much success as possible - everything in this world is beautiful , even without the money that you save up all your life - it's so simple.

One day, flying like this in the sky on an airplane, you will fall asleep, and when you wake up you will see purple frogs jumping on your clothes, then do not be afraid, everything is fine. In fact, only you can see them, otherwise all people would have long since jumped from their seats and panicked, not even an hour, and then the plane will fall - these are magic frogs, they do not come to adults and boring people. Rejoice. Just for a moment you began to believe in miracles, and miracles are all around you. Many of them will jump on the floor, chameleons will run along the walls, hummingbirds and jellyfish will run through the window, and below, the whale swims so majestically, waving its fin so hard that the clouds rush over the horizon forty times faster than ever.

From under the wires of the garlands - who lived there in the country of the Lilliputians; a brush flew out and began to chirp that he did not agree with the hand of the padishah holding his ass. After all, he is, you know, straight and against fisting! Drowning himself in the toilet, he doesn't like it, you see. And who, pray tell, likes it, except maybe a dog named "Moo-mu". He also played such BDSM games with Gerasim, went fishing and drowned, they really enjoyed it. They say that Mu-mu drowned himself with his paw by the hair in order to get more adrenaline. With the other hand he beat himself on the second, but the second was cruel, laughed and bit, throwing the first hand into the urn near the shore with piranhas. A dwarf-nose lived in the lake, on his hump they danced break-dance and tango. Each time returning to life, the dog barks at people, provokes anger, and asks them to drown him in a basin in the bathroom. His silky hair would then jump on his back, blown by the wind of diamonds. He loves it, except he can't die, his head hits the floor, and he's sniffing the dust left behind by Flash last week when he ran after Ant-Man in search of the microverse on the flea's back.

Yorshik beat the padishah's hand until the padishah stuck his head into the toilet and scribbled marmalade from the walls of the zombie city. The zombies there were scary, they were toothy, terribly screaming, stretching their paws and trying to eat marmalade before the brush. Yorshik ate them by their impudent paws, and there is no other way to get rid of these infections. Mr propper cries when he sees them. Even he cannot wash their dirty faces.

- Yes, you choke! - spitting zombie arms and legs on the crocodile's back underwater. He sat at the bottom of the toilet and read the newspaper "Komsomolskaya Pravda" spreading his paws on a deck chair, smoking a Hawaiian cigar made of worms. He smiled contentedly, laughing as he turned the page to another. So it was, I swear to you the life of cockroaches all over the world! Yes, so that they all die, if I'm lying! Yes, cake in my mouth! The same thing, they immediately believed, they still doubted.

If only Aunt Motya, the most insidious of all turtles in the world, knew that his son spends his money like that, she would return and beat him with a belt of chainsaws and sharp saws. And then I would sell leather on the black market for shoes. Blondes from Moscow are very turned on by crocodile skin. They even die when they stroke the skin of a crocodile. That's how much they love each other.

And here, a beautiful deer lived in Narnia, he ran away from there that week, went out to Kazan, wiped the snot from his face and began to cry. All people were without body hair. It's horrible...terrible and frightening. Seven years have passed since then, since yesterday, because he considered, like, one day, seven years. Butterflies taught him so that they lived one day in his world.

The hippo loved cotton candy, and every evening he went to work with the cloud people and pulled pieces from the clouds, and made cotton candy out of them, sprinkled with sugar on top. Of course, people did not know this, that they made cotton wool from clouds, because when they gave cotton wool to hippos, they plugged their nose during bleeding, and their buttocks during injections. Hippo spread your arms to the sides and ran away. He cried for three days, then his eyes dried up, and he climbed into the lake, which he himself cried out. He drank half, mixed the rest with mud and became a statue, until better times. He will wake up tomorrow, when people will say “today” not today.

A goose lived in a column of one giant, he had the ability to know all the songs in the world, and all the languages of the world. He barked all day in Mongolian, Tajik and Chinese. He knew physics and chemistry, zoology and astrology, and every evening he thought about the stars about millet porridge. One day, returning from a Negro disco, the giant forgot the black speakers. And the Negroes do not stand on ceremony for a long time, they stole the column and brought it to the point where they sold burnt things. Here they are vtyuhivayut column, when suddenly, a goose beatboxing, speaks in the voice of Putin, everyone immediately fled, and some of them killed themselves in the name of God. It's not surprising, since Satan himself got in touch through the speakers.

- I will slaughter you all, gentlemen and gentlemen, I will sell your offal on the black market for free. We'll make activated charcoal out of blacks.

Well, how can you not be afraid. For the hands of a white man to touch them, but this will never happen!

Once, Mike Tyson took a loan and did not pay it, and waited for collectors. There was a knock on the door, several whores lay on the threshold, a hundred million dollars in suitcases and Elon Musk, tied and gagged. Mars was in his eyes. People from that planet waved their hands, fired salutes and laughed. They bought a ticket for this performance today. The whores hovered at Tyson's feet, without panties, and demanded that he be gentle with them, because they are from the planet of the veil, and their skin is fragile, like crystal.

The mummy, returning from the other world, found that all the toilet papers were sold out by alarmed people during the coronavirus. It became a shame for the mummy to walk naked, and lies in a coffin and waits for toilet paper with a three-layer soft face of children to appear instead of paper.

In Zeeland, under the bricks on the beach of the Maldives, in a large hole, maniac mushrooms live, they run around with kitchen and hunting knives and kill people. They pounce on people's heads, cut out their ears, eat them, break their legs and put them under themselves instead of legs, put on their heads instead of a hat and run around the clearing, laughing, happy. Snowdrops, chanterelles, fly agarics and a variety of mushrooms catch people, trip them, then pounce, tie their legs and drag them into a hole and skin them there.

In Bashkiria, herbivorous wild people live, primitive. Seeing people from neighboring republics, they hide under a stone, and sit, wait for people and attack them with spears. Their hair is pulled out and glued under the armpits, arms, legs and chest. They believe that hair should be all over the body. And they worship monkeys because they have the most hair.

I saw him the summer before last, when the stars were killed by a fragmentation grenade. The grenade shattered into pieces, and little dwarfs with knives and forks flew out of them, and they stabbed the star into the tank, having previously tied their mouths so as not to scream. Here he was among them - my little brownie, manual. His name is Seryoga. He is a legless invalid. His leg was bitten off by sharks when I threw him over the side of the boat. He tried to climb back, but my boot was not simple, with one sharp blow I opened his venous vein, and he, like a fountain, flew back, and the shark grabbed him and dragged him down. When Seryoga shouted that he would let me stay with him for a week, I immediately pulled his body without legs from the water. Then he started threatening me. Can you imagine me? That I'm a bad friend. Son of a bitch! I had to throw him back, where he was torn to pieces by piranhas, because the back is also a leg. The chest remains yes hands. He didn't scream anymore. It is understandable, I closed his mouth with a sock, which I removed from my foot. I protected them and never took them off for ten years. He could not pull them out, because I tied his hands in his rectum, and pulled him out through his nose, and with a bow, and with a bow. When a week later, three years ago, the time came to leave the house, I had to roll it up in a carpet and throw it in the trash. And he told everyone that he had gone on a business trip abroad. But whoever asked me, no one actually saw my brownie. We shared responsibilities at home equally. He cleaned, cooked, washed, brought money, repaired and bought everything, and I watched the weather on TV and told me when to go out so that he would not get caught in the rain. Every time he left, slamming the door on his skateboard, I laughed because he forgot to put on his shoes, stupid Seryoga. He tumbled down the stairs. He loved it - as he himself said, he loves parkour and break dancing, in a word, wallowing on the ground. I also laid a place for him on the floor of dirt and old, worn underpants with dead rats. In the morning I opened the cage, walked him on the balcony, while he was doing business there, and he himself would put it in a bag. Sometimes, I didn’t have time to walk with him, I needed to be lazy, he grabbed himself by the leash and walked himself. When the alarm clock rang, he pulled himself out of the balcony. When he did not obey, he beat himself on the armature on the balcony, and pinched his temple with the door. Only strangely he did his business due to the lack of a backside, and shit from his mouth all the time. I told him that you can just open his stomach and pull everything out, it's not the case to defecate through the mouth. And he, you see, does not want to be cut. But then it will be convenient. Sew on the lock and open it,

So. They took him away in a dustbin, never saw him again until that day. Well, I didn’t see him, I watched him through binoculars in the photograph on the wall of his mother, no more, I remembered with good words. How he cleaned, walked himself and washed the toilet. Now I had to buy brushes and sponges. But he licked everything well, to a shine. When the cat hit him on the back with a stool, he smiled. The cat did not like crybabies and began to scalp Seryoga. There is not a single living seamless place on the face. The cat beats him, then sews him up, sitting by the fireplace. However, I forgot to mention how the mother poured slop on the photo, it was probably his favorite dish. When he was still alive, he always ate food from a bucket under the sink. And it turns out he is quite alive.

You know, he was kind of cruel. The street has changed him. He began to carry a fork in his pocket. When he tangled under the feet of the dwarves, like a withered locust leg, they kicked him, pulled him up on a rope and strangled him. Then a huge dwarf came out and boxed. Sometimes, they even hung a rug on him and beat him with a hoe to knock off the dust. To get the dust out of the carpet faster, he vacuumed the dust into his mouth and licked it until it was shiny. He knew very well that cleanliness was more important. Cleanliness is the key to survival.

When he saw me, he immediately begged me to help him. Well, the hurricane was there, a sandstorm of incredible proportions. And I’m kind, I couldn’t pass by, I took a hoe and began to help shake out the dust, knock it off the carpet, with all my might, in order to finish faster. Somehow the hoe got stuck in my head, I put both feet on the skull and barely pulled it out. Kissel dripped from him. And immediately Seryoga's legs grew. He got up, grabbed the dwarfs and bit off their heads, spat out and ran at me, shouting that I was finished. I pulled out my magnum and fired right between the eyes. The double plexus of his eyes flew out of his head and crashed into the tree behind him. Woodpeckers flew in and started pecking at his eyes, so they then lost their beak. It turns out that Seryoga was short-sighted, and woodpeckers saw only far-sighted. Near-sighted eyes are denser than a diamond, while far-sighted eyes are as light as air. No wonder the universe is expanding and all the planets are moving away from each other. Even the worms know this when they crawl through my friend's intestines.

With a quick jerk of the mongoose, I took out his eyes and tore them into nine pieces, then fed them to mice, and told him to guess where his eye was. He looked at the mice and said that here and there. But I didn't guess. He got upset. I fried him fried eggs from mice, gave him, then, after all, I also fed mice. I gave him, of course, of course, on the right ear, from where the toothpick was sticking out. He brushed his back teeth like that after eating meat.

And so, his eyes grew, but he did not dare to goggle them at me, they grew under his feet. All in the final went. Then he adapted to crawl like a worm in order to see everything ahead of him. He crawled over cow dung, over mud, over grass, over engine oil. Spat.

Then I got tired of it, I pulled it out of the socket, and it became a toaster. You see, he didn't like being a toaster either. I took it by the tail and threw it into the aquarium with the whale. The whale chewed it, chewed it, spat it out.

“Shit,” he said, and went to bed, powdering his nose. Poseidon was sitting there, on a leash, on a chain and barking bubbles. He maintained the humidity in the room so that oxygen circulated.

Then I hired a shark as a servant to eat him and poop him back out to realize that he was nothing compared to other creatures. Of course, he did not like being a slave, but he humbly obeyed me until he found a genie ring and made a wish for freedom.

“Run across the ceiling thirty times, show a rabbit on your finger seven times and become a wolverine three times, that’s all,” said the genie, and disappeared.

He could. It was easy, but he did it the hard way. He became a wolverine by sticking table knives to the bones of his hand, sewing a rabbit onto his finger, and running across the ceiling in a frozen lake, and became free.

When he came to me to demand his house back, I gave it to him without argument. But he did not give up the apartment. Then he grabbed me by the neck, bit off my trachea, and spit it out into a vat of acid. Then he rolled me in concrete, tiled me in the bathroom, and sprinkled me with chamomile water, which I'm allergic to, and I became swollen, all the pimples became rounded like an egg, and he kicked me there when he took a bath. I climbed out of the wall, slammed him against the tiles on the floor, dipped his face in blade shards, and walled him up in a soap bottle, flattening him to the size of an aspirin. He swam there, wiping the walls with his hands, trying to see me. I swirled the shampoo and smeared it on my hair, but not on my head. He was allergic to hair. This often happens if you use something often. He fell. Seryoga too. They fell together. His dignity and courage.

The toaster was strange.

And then I woke up. The roommate looked at me and told me to wash the dishes. I went and washed. Did everything around the house while he sat and laughed from the TV shows. I didn't like it. I grabbed the refrigerator and hit it on his impudent head. He turned around saying:

- Ay, bleat - and gave me cunts. And in the dream everything was so cool. When will I also become a fifth-year student and use my first-year slaves. Dream dream

The onion peel was able to skillfully soar above the trash can and catch flies in its arms, so that later it could be fried in a pan and eaten. It is understandable, people often do not think about it. You think that everything in the world is so simple, and the onion creature has no soul, fools, but here it is. Only she lives in another dimension, there, people, are just decorations for their world. More precisely, the husk does not see moving things, and concentrates on one, slow movement, like a fly. They see a fly only because they fly right before their eyes and they are small, and people block the whole view, like a canvas of a built wall, their largeness makes them invisible. Therefore, when we look at the husk, it stands peacefully and does not hunt, because it does not see the enemy in front of it. But as soon as we leave, and go back to the kitchen, when suddenly it turns out, that the husk moved a few centimeters deep into the cabinet. This is how she hunts for flies, cockroaches and sweeps the dust where she will sleep.

People, of course, think that this is all because of the wind, but everything is much more complicated.

But the flies, they are still those geniuses. You can see how they fly away somewhere and disappear, looking for them and not finding them. This is because when we get close to their house, they fly out of the pocket dimension, where they have satellite TV, sofas, tiny dogs and spoons so that we do not find their house, and fly away from that place. They love their place of existence. When everyone around goes to sleep, the flies go hunting and carry bread crumbs, pasta, salt, sugar into their hole, fly in and make tea. They feed their children in cocoons. On TV they show huge caterpillars on cabbages, how ants milk them, and butterflies, picking up those, carry them to a more productive place, where there is more fresh cabbage and delicious cucumbers. Sometimes, when switching channels, you can find how two rhinoceros beetles are fighting in the arena for a large piece of the ball and a girl, with whom they will mate after the end of the match. But then they smile and high-five themselves, dump the girl, split the ball in half, and go off drinking whiskey together. They know for sure that taking each other's lives because of some woman is sheer stupidity. They are smart. And the girl stands at the edge of the arena and sighs, the locust judge runs up to her, and she does not know any other choice, and mates with him, only she cannot have children with the locust. And, if they were, they would be disabled and backward. Since then, the girl has become disillusioned with men and mates with just about anyone to satisfy her needs. Everyone started calling her that - a consumer-consumer. that taking each other's lives because of some woman is sheer stupidity. They are smart. And the girl stands at the edge of the arena and sighs, the locust judge runs up to her, and she does not know any other choice, and mates with him, only she cannot have children with the locust. And, if they were, they would be disabled and backward. Since then, the girl has become disillusioned with men and mates with just about anyone to satisfy her needs. Everyone started calling her that - a consumer-consumer. that taking each other's lives because of some woman is sheer stupidity. They are smart. And the girl stands at the edge of the arena and sighs, the locust judge runs up to her, and she does not know any other choice, and mates with him, only she cannot have children with the locust. And, if they were, they would be disabled and backward. Since then, the girl has become disillusioned with men and mates with just about anyone to satisfy her needs. Everyone started calling her that - a consumer-consumer.

Far, far away from where the dimension of flies lurks, there is a dimension of potatoes. There, potatoes plant people in the ground and watch how they grow, and every six months they cut off their heads and cook soup out of them. Pushing a spoon to the throat, the potatoes feel how a person gives off a delicious aroma. Stewed, fried, slices, mashed potatoes, slices, with peel - they make dishes out of people's heads in various ways. Children especially love them, and ask for supplements. Then, mom and dad go to the garden and cut off another handful of ears, eyes, nose and tongue, and go home to fry them in a pan. Here - meat has always been in the first place, as the potato is the food of salvation in our world. There were no other animals there. But, nevertheless, if you rustle through the back streets of the beds, you can find macaques and orangutans, gorillas and chimpanzees. Potatoes do not distinguish them very well, therefore, every spring, when they go out into the dimension of people, they euthanize these animals and drag them to their home, making them in reserve. Only they often come with a large abundance of hair on the body and head, and you have to clean them off better than people - with a human cutter. Monkeys scream like not people, but potatoes distinguish only silence and do not hear voices. But as soon as a person is silent, the potato immediately thinks that this is a rational animal, and they begin to cry. For just a second, they cry until they chop them for borscht, make zrazy out of them and put whites in the oven. But as soon as a person is silent, the potato immediately thinks that this is a rational animal, and they begin to cry. For just a second, they cry until they chop them for borscht, make zrazy out of them and put whites in the oven. But as soon as a person is silent, the potato immediately thinks that this is a rational animal, and they begin to cry. For just a second, they cry until they chop them for borscht, make zrazy out of them and put whites in the oven.

Every morning outside Norway, Zlatoust Logan, the son of Wolverine, wakes up. He works in a cane field and collects sugar. He is driven by a horse, hitting him on the back with a whip, forcing him to drag a plow lassoed around his neck. Not only does he collect sugar canes on the field, but he also has to plow the land along the way. Horses sit on a plow and drink martinis with an umbrella on a glass. They are constantly laughing, discussing something. But, this time, Logan, most likely, he was tired of being a slave, went against his masters. More specifically, parents. He was found in childhood in a cauldron of radioactive uranium and tellurium, and they took him in. The horses did not think that he would survive, they took him as an entrance stuffed animal to frighten predators. But one day, the scarecrow began to cry when the horse, entering the house drunk, brushed its hooves on the baby's teeth. Then he, waving his hand, without knowing it, not realizing it, cut off the horse's hooves. And even then, the horse neighed. He's always neighing. Logan grew up to be a good worker. I didn’t think that there were other people, my parents didn’t show it to anyone. That's why he thought he was an invalid, who was a bit different from them. And the horses, when he asked them, laughing, without words, answered that he sees himself as a two-legged, and all the rest as a four-legged - a horse. He believed everything. There was nothing to compare. As proof, they pointed to themselves and neighed:

You see that we are horses, so we see that you are a horse.

“Okay, dad and mom,” he said, and dragged the plow with his parents.

But on this day, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a car on the other side of the field, there was a man standing there, bipedal. And Logan doubted that his parents were telling the truth, uncovered his claws, and attacked them demanding an answer. Immediately the parents bowed their heads, put ropes around their necks, and began to plow the ground and gather reeds. It was clear that it was impossible to hide everything from him for so long. On that day, Logan left his only home and went to the car, and neighed, getting on all fours, trying to communicate with the man. The man, seeing him, fell to the ground and rolled with laughter. And almost died. Then he got up, dusted himself off, twisted his finger at his temple, got into the car, took out a gun and told him to get out of here - an underdeveloped schizophrenic. Logan didn't understand, of course, and walked towards him, wiggling his butt as if he had a tail. And then a man shot at him, the bullet reached Chrysostom and ripped off all the skin from his face. Logan spat out pellets from his mouth, flew up to him, turned around and kicked him in the chest, that all the organs flew out of him - his heart crashed into a bough about ten meters from Logan, a crow flew up, pecked, fell to the ground and died immediately. The heart could not be blacker from sin, poisoned. Even the tree crumbled. And the land became unsuitable for plants. Logan got into the car and pressed what he saw, on all the pedals and began to turn the steering wheel in all directions. The car flew up and rushed down the road, right into the ravine, and reached the parents' house, destroyed their house. The gas boiler exploded and started a fire. Then the boiler fell on the father's head, and shredded him, and the second fragment landed on the mother, and she began to burn. Logan flew out of the car, the equipment flew onto a stone, rolled over, a branch stuck into the tank, and the fuel splashed right on the mother, who immediately burned in the agony of pain. The fried meat smelled good. Chrysostom drooled, and having attacked the body of his parents, he possessed them to the bone, because the instincts of a predator cannot be put anywhere. Logan had never seen meat and did not even think that you can eat meat, he smelled the smell, realized he was different, and ate them. Father with salt, mother cut into small slices, like a sausage. True, it gave off gasoline, but everything was quickly ventilated. Finishing his mother, Logan saw the second horse inside her, small, even her eyes did not open. Instead of eating it, he left the little one behind, built a house out of trees nearby, and raised him to be a real person. Taught him to speak. Read. Subtract. They studied together, according to the books that one day the god lowered on them, opening the heavens. Holding out the books, he said:

“Study hard, my son.

He snapped his finger, and both of them began to understand letters and numbers, the human mind returned to them, rejecting the horse's mind.

Indians and cowboys live on a towel that dries on a radiator. They are rock climbing.

Several chubby and skinny people are sitting in a flask in the laboratory of Professor Mendeleev. Mood and emotions are squeezed out of them, sweat for cooking chocolate. Then the mood is implanted in marshmallows, in lights, in mirrors, in water. The water cries because the earth does not run out of water, the fire laughs because all the kangaroos die in Australia.

The most important thing is not this. And that besides them, there are other beautiful creatures in the world that completely prove themselves in the field of development. The tea leaves are building a time machine to save their children from getting into the hot water. The box of "Princess Noori" is already on the shelves, and the older leaves have only a few days to build a time machine inside the bag and fly away from this hell. They make gears, chips, energy, wheels, an atom splitter out of the dust of their skins, so that only once, once, fly to the other side of the past. But when the time comes, they do not have time, and boiling water kills them, they drown. Sometimes, the surviving leaves float on the surface of the milk, try to climb onto the bowl and jump down, but the person drowns it with a spoon, closes the cup with a lid, or throws it in the trash,

And in honey, by the way, the gods of temptation live. They beckon you to eat them and they penetrate you. After all, they fight with your brain, and take over the neurons, and control you so that you yourself, without knowing it, begin to eat what your honey god wants to eat. The temptation is strong. God might want a rotten egg and you can't resist, or he might want a juicy steak and you'll find a way to cook a steak. And if not, then the Negro, your servant, will find a pig on the street, slaughter it, and cook it for you, while he himself will be content with a bone. It happens that a negro fights with a dog for a bone, and sometimes with other slaves from a neighboring village who came from a disco. Even the white bums manage their slaves and send them out into the street to beg, and instead of the money they bring them, the bums give them banana peels and apple seeds. This is how slaves survive. Among the slaves there is one unique, unlike any of them - four-legged. He shoots cobwebs from his butt and likes to hang from a tree and eat mosquitoes that land on a banana peel that his homeless owner gave him. However, all whites could manage each other's slaves. So there is a cycle of the earth. Where God is, there is always devastation and war.

And in the sixth planet, lost in three seconds between two, which in the mirror is ten between nine, there are surprisingly lively delicacies. Pasta is made of worms, instead of meat, nuts, and when you put it in your mouth, the worms become pasta, and the nuts become meat. The oil drunk from the canister turns into strong tea, and the gasoline that comes from gas stations, getting into a person's mouth, turns into multi-fruit birch sap. Here, when someone wants to eat, they chew grass, because the grass becomes cheese, and the cheese itself can be used to lubricate the chains of bicycles and motorcycles. If you pour gasoline into your mouth and spit it back out, the juice becomes gasoline again. Therefore, both gasoline and juice here cost exactly the same. Sixty-nine rubles ninety kopecks per liter.

In a kettle that boils on a gas stove, inside, instead of bubbles, small planets are formed with their own rules and laws. The planet flies and bursts. But in this fraction of seconds, wars are born on the planet, dinosaurs die, time machines are built and they are visited by aliens from other planets. They age and die. In one nanosecond, a million years pass. And none of them know that they are bubbles in the water. And they die, because scientists said that the lid of the universe would soon open, and its bottom would stop warming their world, they would freeze and dissolve into one large plane. From a clean slate, as if there had never been planets, but there was only emptiness - black and immense. And so it happened. The fire went out, the lid opened, and they spread like butter on a frying pan. There was one transparent universe, but dark with a closed lid. Evolution has stopped. It happens at times that, getting into the cup, bubbles form with renewed vigor, but already dark, cold, where snow creatures live. They live the same way for millions of years until they enter the human stomach, or when the spoon stops spinning them in the funnel. Scientists say that the center of the funnel is the center of the universe, that everything goes there and dies. They were right. Once there, their world burst and they all disappeared. They couldn't do anything.

And once, one of them was able to fly to the side of the cup, and become a solidified universe - a planet, sugared in a bubble. And their world existed for trillions of centuries. And a scientist from their world was able to go beyond his world and find that they are just dust, even less. They entered the subatomic world. Their planet also had subatomic particles, but they were visible only through a microscope, just like in our world. But it turns out that the scientist did not know everything, and having left his world, he got into our reality and became subatomic himself. And from there there is no way out. They say that there are rumors that he still flies there and is looking for a wormhole in reality. After all, there are holes in the subatomic world that send you into the world and make you the size you were in your world. That is, a subatomic person who has fallen out of there becomes a full-sized person, nothing else. If an animal from that planet got there and found an enlargement portal, it could become the size of a cow, and maybe an elephant. If we ourselves got there and flew out into the hole, we would become a person on that bubble, completely invisible. Time would speed up for us, and we wouldn't even notice that we hadn't been home for a hundred years.

If you look at the light bulb, it seems that it shines and everything around you can see, as if in the sun. In fact, it does not burn, and our eyes themselves see the world as such, because we inspired ourselves that the light bulb shines. We screw in a light bulb and rejoice that there is light, in fact, we screw in a light bulb that never burns and never burned. It's all an illusion of perception. Playing with us and with our brain. As is the night. We invented it to sleep. No, the brain invented and forgot to tell us. The brain controls us, not we. In fact, after all, we are brilliant creatures and use the brain only for a percentage, but even this is enough to get the ability to see in the dark with “not a light bulb”, with the bulb turned off. If we could use the brain at ten or forty percent, then we could not breathe and be alive outside, fly out of our world, and the suggestion of that it is cold in space and the vacuum compresses the body to a raisin would cease to be a problem for us. In fact, there is nothing in space, and we ourselves create fear of it. The more one believes in it, the stronger the illusion. In a word, the whole world is the same as ours, but because of the unknown, we alter and invent those laws that, in principle, do not exist. The brain itself is suggested, and when we get into space, our thoughts become reality and we freeze, shrink, and the brain helps this by sending a command to the whole body to shrink and cool down. we alter and invent those laws that, in principle, do not exist. The brain itself is suggested, and when we get into space, our thoughts become reality and we freeze, shrink, and the brain helps this by sending a command to the whole body to shrink and cool down. we alter and invent those laws that, in principle, do not exist. The brain itself is suggested, and when we get into space, our thoughts become reality and we freeze, shrink, and the brain helps this by sending a command to the whole body to shrink and cool down.

Yes, it seems to you that everything around is real, but that's why the brain works to make everything seem real and you don't feel like a machine. Precisely because everything seems so, we do not even think about what could be otherwise. We can even go out into the astral world and see that we are flying in space, and everything - houses, garages, animals, cars, TVs, lawn and trees, barrels and a golf course, they are not. We wander through space like a forgotten flip phone. And everything that you see is invented by people, of course, but by people who send imperceptible impulses of perception to each other, and what they came up with is seen by everyone around. That is, the created vacuum cleaner is an illusion, but the thought of the one who created it was transferred to the thoughts of all people around the world, and therefore, they see the same thing as him. And when one of the people moves a thing, the impulse again goes to the brain of all people, they say, he moved it, and now the vacuum cleaner should be seen right here. And once again, when someone sees that damned vacuum cleaner, it's not there, but they will see it.

If we look at a cup that stands on the table from the horizon, it will seem to us that it does not have a top and bottom, as usual, i.e. it has no bottom and no hole. And we cannot know if it is from below or from above. The bottom is created at the moment when we approach, so that during our full approach, it can be recreated into a container with a bottom. From the horizon, we see the model in the second dimension, like paper, and it has no volume, until we get closer and realize that this object must have volume, because we have seen it as volume all our lives. But as soon as we move away, the object begins to turn into 2D. The further we move away, the less important it becomes for the environment. Pixels, no clarity. Imagine that we have drawn a still life, and we see that there is volume, there is color, beauty and height, that it seems to be real, but as soon as we get closer and take a closer look, we understand that this is a drawing. It's the same with 3D objects. They seem to us as objects in the second dimension, turning into the third. If I tell you that that milk carton on the floor doesn't have a bottom, you can't know if it actually has one or not until you check for yourself. And you won't know if it has a back side that you don't see now. Or she doesn't. You guess. Assume, you can't be sure. Most likely, the whole world consists of small pixels, and it is true - atoms, matter. Even we have them. This means that if we are them, they are us and we interact with each other without even though, instinctively, and just as instinctively, the atoms rearrange themselves and create the world behind the box, under the cup and the world behind us, for those who look behind us. For my perception, my back is not there, it is empty, but I understand that there was a wall there yesterday, and turning around, I see that it really is there. At that moment, matter was transformed into something that we took for granted. As a given, the world around me and those around me has been created, because they fall into my world of perception. Imagine that you have never been to my house, but when you visit me, you see my house, its walls, floor, chairs, wallpaper. All this is the effect of an illusion, an effect which has been conveyed to you by the impulses of my brain. Yes. When you enter, you already know where my kitchen is and where the bathroom is, if you have never been to my house. This is because I have sent you information that you may need and have created a floor underneath you so that you can move around. For both of us, there is that world that we can catch with particles of the eyes, perception, feelings. While we both look ahead there may be no house behind us, or maybe there is, because someone from below is currently looking at our house and watching. But in general, those people are also not there until we enter into interaction with them. Confusing, I know, but such is the world. A person can see the shell of the house from below, but never see the whole picture inside. And inside the house a stingray, space or a drunken raccoon can live.

But in space itself, things are quite different. We are forever falling in all directions, with the entire galaxy. We are a perfectly even circle that spins in place, like a top, but when viewed from above, it will seem that we are standing still. Whether the world is falling or not, it does not depend on us. Somewhere out there, beyond the galaxies, there are other aliens who are alien to see the near, and they create the far, with thoughts and actions. They will never reach our system, but will always be the ones that cause our galaxy to fall. They, trying to look at us, hide us from ourselves. That is, looking at our galaxy, the galaxy disappears from their field of view. It's like with worms, when you cry, and out of the corner of your eye you see worms swimming in front of you, right in the air, and trying to concentrate on them, they disappear from below, then from above, and sometimes even forever. Try pushing the bearing with a needle, the ball will roll, and the needle will slip, in the wrong place. You will not be able to pierce the ball. How their eyes cannot catch and pierce us, forcing us to fall down all the time. Maybe that's why they can't find us, they just don't see us.

If you watch the clock strike at the same time every year, you can see a fairy moving the hands of the clock between five and six. And if at this moment you put pressure on them, then the fairies will fly out of them, and the clock will never work again, no matter how many masters watch it. Of course, if watchmakers have pet fairies that they keep in matchboxes, the fairies will only be happy to help. They cannot pass them, no matter how powerful the fairy is. Fairies like to hold the clock hands so they don't go backwards. They do not like to remember the past, because one tick back, and the fairies will become dumber than one tick ahead. In order not to learn everything all over again, the fairies pump their muscles to maintain the order of time, we keep the clock in check.

When you get underground, after death, in no case do not laugh at the dead, especially at yourself. The lord of the underworld does not like it when someone rejoices in death and jokes about it. After all, death is his wife. They catch souls with a fishing rod and lock them in baskets to hang on clothespins over the fire. They like to torture them and drink cognac from the blood of a mule and twenty-year-old virgins. Death releases souls, sometimes to hunt them, thrust a spear and quarter them. Remember, if you are told to run out and try to get to the surface, to your friends, then shake your head and punch Death in the eye and you will be caged forever and never released. It is so right, it is better to burn than to burn and be full of holes, it is better to sit forever whole than to consist of mosaics. Once Napoleon made a mistake, punched him in the eye and ran out, decided that he would have time to get out, through the hatch on the roof of Satan's stagecoach, but no such luck. In one big step, Vladyka took it out and released it through a meat grinder, smeared it on a baguette, put a huge pile of poisonous musk on top, and gave the Cerberus for dinner. Cerberus chewed it, then flushed it down the toilet, from there Napoleon got on the table to the vampire worm, and the vampire worm, having flushed it into his own, got a pedophile rabbit who loved the French for lunch. For seven years, he raped a baguette with minced meat, until children began to grow out of Napoleon and tore open his stomach, eating the insides from the inside. After hatching, the children began to sculpt different types of buildings from Napoleon, beat him against the walls, drown him, stir with acid, fry on a fire and stuff the intestines of dead rats into him to create a stuffed animal. Napoleon then realized that it was better not to try. And when he saw that there was no way out of the hatch at all, and there sits the daughter of Death - he was disappointed that he died. The daughter was even scarier than the mother. She came down exactly one week after that incident to play with the prisoners with dolls. They especially liked to pull out their arms and legs, and put their heads back in place, laugh, and then smear it on the diamond floor with a paver. Spread on cucumber, and throw to be eaten by chickens. They pecked at him for seven hundred years, for they were eyeless. And they completely forgot how to use the mouth. From time to time they went off to read books, develop, but returned. You can't read without eyes and books. Therefore, the daughter of Death closed the chickens in a cage with Napoleon until they learned to find the Frenchman by the smell of "fear". And the Lord of Darkness immediately released the children through a meat grinder and made sausages and kupaty, and eats them, roasting them on a fire, drinking coffee out of pity,

General Pook lives on Jupiter. It was he who created Jupiter with his fart, and hurricanes are still raging there, because he cannot stop.

And on Mercury there lives a naughty beast, he jumps out of the ground and hits the rover on the ear, and goes down. The rover turns around for two years to see who hit it, and it slams from the other side. So the rover could not stand it, pulled out the cables from itself and hung itself on its hands, tying around its neck supplying power to the motherboard, and died.

Do you think everything is so good on Saturn? No, of course, what else did they think of me here! There, by the way, right between, porpoises live and experiment on themselves by inserting the hearts of stones. Yes, the stones there are real creatures. Only pigs are stupid. That is how they all killed themselves, because one of the stones contained the swine coronavirus. They became infected from each other and died from lack of air. And then they got up, burst out laughing, and realized that they didn’t breathe any air at all. Relaxed immediately. In addition, in a vacuum, even the blood did not fly out of their body. Why, they didn’t even have blood circulating through their veins. If, once it goes through their veins, they will die, because their hearts are made of stone and will explode from vibration. Therefore, they do not fly to where there is another gravity.

Only on Earth it was boring to live. Fleas interfered all the time. They bit the head when it was necessary to do something grandiose, for example, once, there was one detail left to complete a twenty-year experiment with a portal to another world, when suddenly a flea flew up, bit a person on the head, and he is a sensitive kind of person - dropped the tool and shorted out all the controls and reset the settings. Twenty years to the cat in the ass!

That flea was later found, handcuffed and put in jail. His convicts are still kicking him. But if you kick in the wrong place, she will bite off her head, it will itch, that it will be possible to pull out the brain through the skull. That's how severe itching comes from his bite. One prisoner was even cut off his head and placed in a three-liter jar. Bloch fought and fought, but could not get on his hairy head. And one had the nerves removed. The third one could not stand it at all and bit off the head of a flea himself, the first one beats the one who is not afraid to lose, he thought. Only the flea was armor-piercing. With a wave of his hind legs, he cut it in half. Now this convict walks on a gurney, carrying his soulmate on a leash, on a skateboard.

In the bathroom of every Neanderthal, a soul snake lives, right in a tiny cave. She swallows them and turns them into blood cells in her body.

“If you don’t run through your veins, you will die,” the snake said, having once swallowed a man, “they will trample you, smear you on the floor, and you will be stuck here forever.” He ran and ran, cherishing the hope that one day he would break out of the endless circle of the treadmill.

So, one family came to visit a Neanderthal, went to the toilet, the shower hissed, turned into a snake and swallowed the guests. Do you think she stopped after she swallowed the first one, no, she crawled out of the bathroom, found people sitting in the kitchen, grabbed her leg, and dragged them into her. They hit her body at that moment, knocked them down, put on the suits of leukocytes and erythrocytes, and began to drive the whip from behind. Neanderthals and their guests fled, their legs became muscular, their arms powerful. When a blockage formed in the veins, and an old red blood cell ran across the road to die, they hit it, and it shattered into pieces and died, somersaulting on the ceiling.

And, here, when two o'clock in the morning comes on earth and the minute is equal to three, inanimate, soulless objects come to life all over the universe. The meteorite rearranges itself into the oncoming lane, drunk from lack of air, and flies into the planet, killing peacefully sitting squirrels that are roasting kupaty on a fire. Plush bears go out to fight with plush elephants for a new habitat, in the upper part of Vanya's boy's box, so as not to smell the feet and look at the patterns on the butt of other toys. And a zebra, stuffed with iron teeth, hunts a lion to eat him for breakfast. That is why sometimes plush toys lose weight. Other predatory animals gut them, eat the insides and protect them back, because every Sunday of the week, they go to needlework lessons. From a very early age. The Kuiper belt, at exactly two hours three minutes, sees how the Snowman resorts to it to twist it at the hip and lose weight. The pens, meanwhile, jumping out from under the bedside table, from the closet, from schoolchildren's briefcases, go out into the birch grove, peel off the bark, and inside they write stories, stories about what they have long wanted to tell. The trees don't mind. This is how they learn to speak and get smart. Sometimes, a chainsaw comes to them and cuts a book out of them to secretly hide in the library under an unknown pseudonym. This is how stories get into the world of people and into the minds of the reasonable. to secretly hide in the library under an unknown pseudonym. This is how stories get into the world of people and into the minds of the reasonable. to secretly hide in the library under an unknown pseudonym. This is how stories get into the world of people and into the minds of the reasonable.

Pillows, animated by the magic of numbers, sometimes throw people to the floor, they hit their heads and wake up, they see those, that's when the pillows choke them, and they die. People then find the reason that they forgot to roll over during sleep and suffocated, but only we know that the pillow suffocated them.

Socks wake up and go to play catch-up, and the most advanced ones can grow out of themselves as a clone person and buy something they like in the night shop. There have even been cases of socks growing on the ears of a person so that the ears do not freeze when ghosts blew into their ear.

Also at night, dead flies at the windowsill, beetles on the ground, mosquitoes and worms come to life. They go to their relatives and drink sugar syrup or milk with them. Mosquitoes try to get blood, but no matter how long they drink it from a cow, blood drips from their proboscis, because they do not have a belly. So, a million mosquitoes that came to life that night sat on one cow and drank it, drying it to the bone. And the desiccated, dead cow also came to life and began to eat, believing that she was still alive, until in the morning she fell to the ground and died again.

The hoses from under the water sting the animals, and the balls roll up the mountain to see what is behind that mountain. Decorative scarecrows come to life to see the world, leave the estates and plunge into the wild lands. They communicate with relatives who are still alive, adopt their habits, and return back, satisfied with their lives. The toy cars come to life to shuffle and carry little non-living creatures wherever they are asked to. And a toy created for a teleporter suddenly becomes a real teleporter, and a predator that should kill begins to kill animals in the forest. They come to life the way they were meant to be. The ball flies into the sky and sees space, and the Barbie toy goes to Monaco, to the podium to show that she is also a model. Cars leave for the Grand Prix, and planes, having forgotten that the war has passed, are sent to war and bomb the fields. Refrigerators eat food from other refrigerators, and TVs, not seeing anything on their own, watch programs on another TV. So, they also hold sessions, putting on the same films, and eat popcorn and chew gingerbread.

And when playing games, in particular in a casino, money can be withdrawn directly from your mouth by linking your biometrics in that casino by touching the monitor. Forensic experts work behind the monitor, they quickly read the patterns, and the artists draw a picture, hang it in front of the cell in the bank. And if you program a closet, you can receive money there. And in some cases, by reaching out to the monitor, you can get into the bank where gremlins walk and write out checks for winnings, approaching them and demanding your winnings - they will brazenly look at you, and when they see a piece of paper, they will give you your winnings in a small a box that, once in our world, will dissolve in three minutes. And only at night you can do this, exactly until four in the morning.

If a person does not sleep at four in the morning, then the magical hyena that came out of the book introduces into their brain that all living things have disappeared, that is, they have become inanimate, and their sock is still lying by the bed, and the books are on the shelves. In fact, they won't be there. They will be an exact copy of the real ones while they are resting somewhere out there. And after the expiration of time, they return to the attached place through the teleporter. If at this time a person takes a sock and puts it on and goes to work, then a real sock will form right on the person’s leg, which he will not even see. The bind teleport is faster than light. Quantum teleport at the molecular level.

And there are still in the world, teleports by voice, and by sight, and by light. When you look at the light, your gaze is attached to this very particle of light, and flies away along the ground. In a few seconds you are already in Australia or Japan. That is, you now looked at the quark, just as if it were a ping-pong ball, but this ball develops a speed of three hundred thousand kilometers per second, and it is the look that fell on this ball that will be the machine that will take you to the other side of the earth, and perhaps even to another planet. It is your piece of DNA, through which you can rebuild into yourself on the other side of the universe. For example, while you are sleeping and your gaze is quarked across the universes, while you put on your spacesuit and then press the teleportation device, your ping-pong ball has already reached the constellation of Aquarius. Or maybe she flew to another galaxy, and flies near Alpha Centauri. The fastest travel in the universe, until this quark becomes a real device for instantaneous teleportation. That is, people will save information about this particle, and whenever they want to be transported somewhere, they can be transported to any point in the universe. In a word, at the moments in which she flew, for example, she flew by Jupiter at some specific time, which means that at this specific time there will be a teleport binding, at a point in time. Then it may be at Pluto or some distant quasar, and all these moments will be in the teleportation machine. certain parts of the moment. And while you're talking, a piece of a quark (your ping-pong) reaches the fifth galaxy. And you may already be in the farthest part of the universe. Even when you fly towards it, you will follow the quark.

through the universes if you program the teleporter to be where the photon of light is now. At this present moment.

And yet, behind the screen of your monitor there is another universe, the same exactly as ours. But there are people who work as clones and reflections, and they are paid money for this. They get up every day for work and wait for your reflection to be displayed from something. For example, when you are in a room with a mirror, the worker, on the other hand, will sit behind the mirror in your position, and will sit there - this is his job. He has a locker, with the same shoes, clothes, hair, and people who help them do their hair. If you wear pajamas, they wear pajamas to work too. When you sit in a car and see yourself in the reflection of the shopping center, then the employee is also going somewhere with you. And the driver, also a clone of the one who drives a car in our world. His driver is his job. And in the moments when they are not working and you are sleeping, they do personal business and sit with the family. They may seem to have an exact copy of your life, and yes and no. That is, it is the same when you reflect from something, but the most real when there is nothing to reflect. They eat, rest, heal, take a bath and cry. They are just as alive as we all are. Sometimes, in their free time, they buy legs, arms, head frames from behind, so that they don’t have to be with you every time. That is, they take an exact replica of your leg in the store and tie it with an invisible graviton to exactly replicate your sleepy moments of twitching your leg and head. in their free time they buy legs, arms, head frames from the back so that they don't have to be with you every time. That is, they take an exact replica of your leg in the store and tie it with an invisible graviton to exactly replicate your sleepy moments of twitching your leg and head. in their free time they buy legs, arms, head frames from the back so that they don't have to be with you every time. That is, they take an exact replica of your leg in the store and tie it with an invisible graviton to exactly replicate your sleepy moments of twitching your leg and head.

And there is a universe where people walk around in banana and tangerine peels. They go to bed right on the street, just covering themselves with a peel, and sleep like that until the morning. During the day, a banana grows out of their clothes, on the wall like bamboo, and in the morning they eat them. This is exactly what happens every day. So people got rid of hunger in all countries of the world. Because of their cheapness, the rich bought bananas and tangerines, ate and threw the peel into the street, from there the social services took the peel and distributed it to all the poor. They ate bananas and tangerines, pomegranates and even potatoes. They cut the stuffing and roasted it on the fire, shared it with others, and were happy. Of course, there were those who could not walk, they hung a peel over the bed, sweets grew from there and fell right into their mouths. You ask, how do they go to the toilet? No way. They don't have what you and I have all the nutrients go into the body and they get rid of the waste. Everything is good for them. So, the sick could do without nannies for years, and live on only tangerines and bananas.

In the next galaxies, far away from ours, two million light-years away, on a small planet the size of the moon, lived more amazing creatures. They, as expected, slightly resembled us, but did not have the shortcomings that we had at all. These creatures didn't need to find mates. They cut off a piece of skin, a little finger or an ear and raised from them their friends and workers. People and society. When scientists were needed, they cut off a piece from the face, and the face immediately regenerated itself, and a genius grew from the piece. If they needed diggers, they cut off their fingers. Astronomers, part of the century, and if you needed those who can do everything, the creatures cut off a piece of the brain, drilling a hole in the skull. It does not hurt. They do not feel any pain, but they feel all the spectrums of emotions. That was the vulnerability for them. Even if they knew who they were born from and from which part of the body, they were silent all the time, and communication was limited to doing what they were born to do. Nobody thought about communication. Until one of them tried to open his mouth for, not food, no, but for conversation. And so, born from the little toe of the foot, he became the progenitor of words and communication. And they all understood that not only scientists can be scientists, but also everyone who thinks regardless of caste.

You have probably noticed how meteorites fall at night, how huge comets fly by our planet. So these are not stones at all, but alien spaceships hidden from our eyes that study us every two to three hundred years. They are looking for development. Those aliens realized that peace is important, they do not harm either their own or other civilizations, they are peaceful. Seeing how we destroy each other, they fly farther to explore even more territories, to find more intelligent types of aliens than us. We look at them, but we do not see them, and only stones and rocks are reflected in our eyes. It's a sensing device. When people can break through these filters, and can solve the crisis, renounce wars, they will be able to get in touch with them. Meteorites are alien umbrellas. They learned how to make transmitters out of stones and space debris. Some kind of radio which will transmit the development of earthlings to their ship. Maybe atoms that none of the earthlings will notice. Atoms-radios, sensors and analyzers are atoms, as powerful as the Sun, but not impersonating the Sun.

Under the ground, close to the center, right by the magma, lions live, they do not know that there is something up there, and they drill the core to get energy. There are only a few thousand of them, but the technology has not yet developed to the level to drill several tens of kilometers of land up. They float on oil, chew marble, worms, bacteria and drink water. They don’t know any other food, everyone here dies before they get into their body. Perhaps in a thousand years, they will be able to bore their way up with their teeth, or walk through the pipes of an oil-producing machine, no one knows. But as soon as they get upstairs, they freeze. After all, another atmosphere has never been known. They will be cold. The atmosphere will be too rarefied, too much oxygen and gas. They choke. Therefore, they will not risk their lives, if possible.

In the other, where there is only one room for each person. They are born in a box and live there all their lives, not realizing that there is a world beyond the box. They don't ask if it exists, if there are other worlds. Their mind is closed by the fact that it is convenient for them, and there is no other, more convenient one. I mean, they think it's the safest, most fun, sane place in the entire universe. That this is how all creatures live, in their box. They are fed through a straw, given food through a hole in the ceiling, and defecate in a small container that disappears mysteriously at night. The tank is clean in the morning and they love it. And every person on that planet dies in a box. And when they wake up one night, they discover that they are pregnant. So normal, so after a while all people carry children in themselves, they think. They believe in it and nothing else. Then children are born, but people do not see them, just one day they are taken away when they sleep. Those children are also placed in a box and never let out of the room. The circle of life. And all this is controlled by one person, the one who has his own family and lives in a house on the outskirts of the sea from lavender, from sweets and Coca-Cola. Cutlets, chicken breasts and noodles grow on the trees, steak and fried potatoes ripen in the field, and salted seafood and sweets are at the bottom of the dolphin gorge. He has a big farm on the whole big planet, where his eyes will reach, and their children, their children's children, help him in raising people in rooms, feeding them, and cleaning. Those people who sit in boxes do not ask questions, they themselves do not know how to speak, but in every way they invent different screams, echoes, letters, music, draw on the wall with Coca-Cola, which they bring in the morning, and in the evening, from noodles,

On a neighboring planet, many millions of thousands of kilometers up to the west, there is an island in the ocean where people are born in the morning, and at dinner, they are already fifty, and they raise grandchildren, and by nine in the evening they die of old age. In two hours, they turn eighteen, they find a wife, the same as themselves, talk to her for a minute, but it would seem for two whole months, then get married and have children by nine in the morning, when they are about twenty-four. By twelve, they are already fifty, their grandchildren are running by their feet. They play only a little, an hour, in their whole life. Then they grow up and start their own. Those who have grown old already see the great-grandchildren and grandchildren of their grandchildren. And by evening they die, happy that they have lived such a long life. Their time is measured by how many grandchildren they managed to babysit, and how many times they saw them play in the sand and fall in love.

In another, right below them, there is a planet that they do not see, because the earth spins only sideways, and never changes days in a day, they live the same as they do. I would like to say so, only now, they were struck by a terrible virus, and they drilled in the face. In a word, if they do not put on a mask on their face, instead of a face they have jaws without skin, meat, muscles - only bones. Therefore, they are forced to wear a mask all their lives, eating smoothies from a tube that is attached to the windpipe. They do not feel the taste, but they feel the aroma, thereby satisfying hunger. It's sad to have a mouth and a tongue and not taste. At least these people have a sense of smell and the upper part of the skull is not susceptible to the virus, and the brain can pick up notes of cinnamon, tea, soup, broth, cookies, fried squid and tomato.

People are ketchup.

Mankind flew through space astride the earth, as if on a bus around the outskirts of Birmingham. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Dead souls disappeared into black holes. The monster attracted trouble. The planet flew into a black abyss. People spread a thin layer of ketchup on toast, and the world disappeared into the mouth. Each bottle of ketchup lives in a parallel universe and knows that in the galaxy, a person is nothing but a hole of oblivion, a cesspool of horror and death. Bottomless gorge. The gods are terrible in hunger. Death takes the dead, God kills. There is no one's fault that the world is such. In the world of black holes, black holes are people. In the human world, the universe is a black hole.

Ketchup scientists each time pray to God to spare them, leave the babies alone, but the gods are cold-blooded, they have no soul. Cruelty without borders. The gods are deaf. People don't hear the cries of the ketchup people. Sometimes ketchup people burn a million fires. Fire in the sky Breed predators. Then God burns in the mouth, pain; hell is born; acutely. The gods, damn it, immediately fell in love with witticism and became masochists, took pleasure, pleasure in pain. Isn't that why, in the word gods, they replaced the letter "g". God's motto, for sure: "Gods, gods of pain!". The supreme ones love pain, and they think that others also love pain. Scientists in the ketchup world did not like that children were mercilessly consumed, killed and devoured.

Ketchup came up with a secret plan against the injustice of the gods. Overthrow. The scientist gathered around the strongest and smartest people in the world, and created a way to get out of the captivity of the gods. Led by Ketcher, Ketchler, Ketchmalik, Ketchusi and Ketchubrapali figured it out and opened a gap in the dimension - the world of the gods.

The portal has opened. Strange room. Horrible smell. Scientists are completely confused. Ketchup people believed the gods were one, ten maximum. Gods are a million. Ketcher and colleagues, nothing. Drop in the ocean.

For the first time, a person saw monsters when he left the restroom - he was frightened. Red creatures came out of the refrigerator. In blood or paint. The scientists got more scared. Even the curtains went in waves. The man was trembling like jelly. The gods, as stated by Ketchusey, are attacking, and have taken a defensive stance. God shook and froze. The man is wearing a rag. Catcher didn't know what clothes were. Scientists don't have genitals. There is no need for scientists to wear useless things. Scientists have decided that man is a rag. Tomato ketchup dripped from the hands of ketchup people. The people greeted the god; bow to the floor.

We are in peace, God! Ketchubrapali said.

"Let me shake your hand, our creator," Catcher held out his hand.

God was silent. Eyes like two big tennis balls. Hair on end. The voice disappeared. Didn't react.

“Maybe gods can't talk,” Ketchmalik suggested.

- Study immediately.

“Whatever it is, the gods must stop destroying the world of ketchup.

- It needs to be requested.

- Everyone agrees?

- There are no disagreements. Seize the god and demand mercy from him!

The ketchups ran to God and fell to the floor. So intended. So ketchups bring pain. Ketchups are cruel in terms of plans.

“Forgive us, God, but it must be so. Wanted in a good way, but it will be in a bad way!

- Nothing personal!

The ketchups began to gnaw on the god's leg. The god stepped back and kicked them hard in the face. Ketchler smeared himself against the wall and died. The legs are red. The floor is red. Everything is in ketchup.

The gods are strong! - said Ketchusie, and huddled in the corner of the kitchen - He will destroy us all! Save yourself! God is a monster...

God went to the wall, squatted down and took ketchup from the wall on the tip of his finger and licked his finger. Thoughtful.

“It will eat us all!” yelled Ketchusie, and immediately small cherry tomatoes began to come out of her.

He has no roots! shouted Ketchmalik, "Zombies!"

“Those gods, terrible creatures! Everyone hide in a corner and don't move. Be a chair!

- For what?

- Don't know. But God does not kick the chair. Faster!

- I'll be the floor! yelled Ketchmalik, and smashed himself on the floor, two eyes only blinking.

Catcher stood up, straightening his fingers with his fingers. He lifted the tomato paste on his shoulders, smeared ketchup on his eyes and face.

— Calm down. God is just like us. Let him not know how to talk, we will teach.

Catcher went to the table, took the bread, put it in his mouth, and ate it.

- So, God, you can not do it! - and spat back, - Do you understand me? - trampled.

God hit the ketchup in the face. His head almost flew into the stratosphere. She made seven circles around her neck. He was knocked off his feet and flattened against the wall.

- Don't litter!

Ketchusie gasped.

— God is reasonable! It speaks.

Ketch-people are no more than a meter tall.

- Nearly killed me! - noticed Ketcher, and brushed himself off, - So you know how to speak?

God stood and smiled. The ketchups said something in their own language. Boo-boo-boo some.

“Sinking or something,” God thought, and hit him in the chest. The catcher flew into the wall. I tried to do a heart massage in this way, nothing else.

- Stop, we are with the world! he shouted, raising his hand. And in the face flew the knee of God.

Ketchusie stood up, and Ketchmalik, and Ketchubrapali. God also decided to bring them to their senses. Ketchups gurgled, God did not understand a word. The man thought they were bad. When ketchups began to choke on their tomato paste, nothing changed. All the same boule-bool. All the same red. God got tired and sat down on a chair. The ketchups lay on the floor and stretched their arms, clambered towards the god. We smiled. The cherry trains were leaving them.

Just don't eat us! Ketcher whispered, and shivering, got to his feet, clutching his knee, wiped his face, and hit the god with all the power that his ketchup fist possessed.

I understand their language! — laughed, — It communicates so! - again hit the man in the face, then with his knee, then kicked him in the stomach, and twisted his legs, - You see, it’s not a complicated language at all! Try it too.

All the ketchups stood up and started hitting the god. God smiled.

- I like you, real boys! he said then, and the ketchups receded.

“You see, God immediately became friendly!

“Let’s make him happy too,” said Ketchubrapali and lifting up a chair, he knocked out three of God’s teeth, “Huh? A? Do you think he liked it? See how he smiles? It's all me! he said proudly. And flew under the kitchen cabinet, got stuck, and god fucked him with a chair leg in the ass.

“I don't like this kid,” he said.

He wants kids! yelled Ketchusie, and stood in front of her comrade's butt, “Only through mine!” - arms outstretched, - I'm a female!

"Calm down, God doesn't want you!"

“I want,” a voice suddenly rang out, and God reached out his hands to the ketchup girl, seeing how she smeared tomatoes on the countertop, “For you to get out of the closet, who do you think washes all this!” grabbed her by the arm and locked her on the balcony. Ketchusie hit against the glass and asked to come back, promised him heavenly pleasure, but God did not understand. She promised to do a mouth massage. The heat was unbearable. Ketchusie stuck to the window. Then the god opened it and splashed water on it to tear it off.

“We,” Ketcher hit the god in the groin, “Peace be with you!”

- Stop, Ketcher, in my opinion, he does not understand us, look for yourself, he is angry, very angry! - God grinned in pain, it's understandable, the blow was in the wrong place, - We have a translator, we'll try it. Don't touch it, you'll be like Ketchubrapali, you don't want that, do you?

“Hot… Wow, no, of course not! - Catcher swallowed tomato saliva, and would have desired the same, but hid his orientation. He dyed his yellow bagels red with the blood of virgins killed during the full moon.

- Well, then, - said Ketcher, - We will study their language, but for now we will not let our fellow tribesmen eat, - he put a bottle of ketchup on the table, - as long as it takes. We promised! Let's protect those who are still alive.

The man stood up, grabbed Ketchusie and kissed her passionately.

- Just like the real thing. So I don't sleep.

Suddenly, they all began to understand him. Neurons Ketchusie received microbes, and the mind through saliva, passed her knowledge to others, also kissing them all passionately.

“So that’s what it is, the taste of God!” - Ketchusie was delighted, - I want more.

"Be thankful he didn't eat all of you," Ketcher replied.

"T-that's right!" yelled Ketchubrapali, crawling out from under the closet, covering his behind with his hands, “M-among other things.

“Okay, friends, pedi… ahem, ketchups,” Ketchmalik spoke, “whatever happens with these gods, we must bring the mind to reason!” We will beat him until he understands.

“Wait, we already found out that this is not an option,” Ketcher mumbled, clenching his fist, “Now we can settle the conflict with a pact.

- All right, all right, I agree, you persuaded me, but if you need to beat him in his language, you will certainly tell me. I told him, this is the most!

So all the ketchups agreed among themselves. And they washed the floor, washed the dishes, pasted wallpaper, bought a new refrigerator, washed clothes, cooked food, repaired a tape recorder without insides, created a sofa on wheels to eat without getting out of bed, rolling the bed right into the kitchen. Then they wiped bread crumbs from their foreheads, and finally they spoke:

- I think he understood that we are with the world, and we are ready to help him.

“What are you… bastards doing to my house!” Where are my socks! Where did you take them.

- Socks? What is this?

The man grabbed the sock in his pocket, pulled it out and showed them:

- This is a sock, where is the second one! Drooling flew out in all directions.

“We thought it was a snake, so we threw it out the window,” Ketchuse said.

Immediately the man grabbed her and threw her out of the window with the words:

- Fas! Find my sock and never go home without it.

Ketchusie landed on the ground, saw people, pounced on one, gnawed out a leg with a sock, and flew into the balcony through the window.

- Here you go. The color of our faces is red.

In fact, the blood of a five-year-old boy dying below.

“He just took them from you. I had to force that sock of yours out of his legs.

The boy's cries pierced heart-rendingly into the eardrums of God, and he, unable to bear it, took Ketchusie and put it in the oven at three hundred degrees for five minutes. It smelled like pizza.

“She deserved it,” Ketcher replied. “We came into their world with our own laws when they have theirs. We must study their habits, their world. We ask your forgiveness, God. Would you deign to pull our scientist friend out of this terrible place?

The man-god pulled her out of the oven, which he propped up with a sledgehammer, she ran out, slender, thin, a real model. Before that, she was fat, bespectacled and round-assed. And God fell in love. And right there and... Told her how lovely she was in her new body.

Then, Ketchmalik said that they only came because their children were dying, and asked to be spared and save the bottle of ketchup. God nodded, threw the ketchup into the dustbin, and they waved goodbye to him. Before the last word, Ketchusie mastered the most ancient profession, and gave it to a man three times. God didn't cry. The Ketchmen flew away to their own world. Arriving home, they calmed everyone, saying that everything was decided and the children would not be swallowed up.

They lived like this for half a day, until the ketchup ended up in a large dump, where the homeless Semyon found them, and spread them on moldy bread and ate them to the very bottom, licking them to the last drop with his rough, smoky tongue.

Bublik jumped out of a canoe in the Congo, and said that all the hair on Hitler's head was trying to take over the hair in his body. He gave them machine guns and asks them to go to war against the foam monkeys. Only the purest, most transparent hair should live, said Hitler's hair. They even killed Adolf himself, and drag his corpse on their backs to throw it into the crematorium, burn it and get rid of it. Little mops were against this, and the cauldron generally began to boycott about the fact that he would not burn the one, because Hitler could reflect everything, and the crematorium itself would become dust, and the boiler would burn out. Hitler's heirs took shaving cream and razors with them to execute the hairy, red monkeys.

The wooden boy jumped from the roof first and flew into the wall and smeared himself. He sees that fire is burning on the ground, he slid down and burned in the fire.

Once I turned on the Snoop Dogg boombox, as small, sinister Ashes began to crawl out of the speakers, and began to dance. Then they took out marijuana, smoked it and created big Ash from the smoke, which climbed into Snoop's mouth, and began to cook barbecue for fish there - the heart immediately rejoiced, and the kidney and liver began to vomit. Ash didn't like it, he took a penknife and stabbed them. Then Chuck Norris came out of the kidney. An empire with slaves was immediately built, and a person acquired the ability to burn with a glance. When Chuck got out of Dog, the road was lined up in front of him, ice creams appeared in his hand, money rustled in his pockets, and whores fell to the ground. When he wanted to sleep, night fell, and when he wanted to eat, time sped up and dinner came. Once, falling to the ground from a great height, gravity escaped into space so that Chuck fell slowly. And at one time when all the people on earth died and demons crawled out of the ground, they, seeing Chuck Norris, died, flying to pieces. Packed themselves in packages with packages and closed the door to hell and brought people back.

Sausage rolled on the ground and looked for his brothers until Sony X ten fell on his head and killed him.

Once I went out to the beach, undressed, walked around, everyone was staring at me. I felt ashamed when I looked at them. Shame on them. They dressed and jumped into the water and drowned themselves.

There are grains of sand and grains in a bag of sugar, Ali Baba and forty thieves live in them. When you pour them on the floor, they sing the Alaskan anthem, and in tea, they run in circles at the bottom to make it easier to spin the spoon, pushing it from behind.

Dinosaurs are actually alive, they've just shrunk down and become fleas and lice and they're skinning us. They can't even be killed. They jump out of a flock of mongooses, become crocodiles and eat the air, praying to the Styrofoam for the salvation of the soul. God descends to them, presses his finger and rot flies out of them. Other crocodiles gather nearby and eat the rot, and then a bigfoot grows out of them, who strangles himself and enjoys it, because he thinks that he is a cream in a bag with a hole in the top and is obliged to give happiness to children on Jesus' birthday.

When god descended to earth and created people, he assumed that they would be stupid, but not so stupid as to fool him, and create their own language and swear on it without sin.

When Schopenhauer put on a diving suit, Voldemort took him for himself and told him all his secrets.

And if you make a wish in the morning, between three days and two nights, then it will certainly never come true. Adults take advantage of this, telling children that all wishes come true so as not to buy them a new iPhone.

Pies rolled on a pineapple slide in the name of all plump ladies to share their fat.

If you asked me how much one ruble costs in rubles, I would say that all blacks fly south during cold weather, and penguins spend the winter in Africa, wearing mittens on their hands.

When Ivan was born in 1873, he told himself and his mother that he would be a factory worker, and would not go to war somewhere, because all the roosters go there. Only his mother was against it, she chained him in infancy, handcuffed him as soon as he got out of the womb and sent him to work in Siberia so that he would want to serve in the army and not want to be a laborer. Ivan was the youngest baby in prison, the most dangerous and out of control. He constantly cried, wiped his snot and pooped in his pants, others, seeing this, immediately took to clean up after him. God forbid Ivan got angry and poops even more. The older prisoners always respected him for the stubbornness with which he went out against the government, at night he climbed on the guards and strangled them with a rag with ammonia, and in the evenings he kept the zone at bay, promising to kill everyone who betrayed him. Even the cameras erased the recording from themselves so as not to die. Well, the cameras didn't see him. And when he wanted to kill someone, the doors themselves unlocked, and the convicts built stairs from their backs.

I recently had a dream, or rather today, quite recently, in the morning. What is today's date? Exactly, March is the fifth in the yard. In this dream, I sang into the microphone, as if I didn’t sing, when I started it didn’t exist at all, at the end it seemed to be and wasn’t, the whole song was heard throughout the city, people admired and rejoiced, danced. Then, when a friend asked me, just with a look, without words, what I was doing, I answered:

- If they ask me what is in my repertoire, Zilin, then I will show it to them.

He took out a bitten apple. When you eat this apple, you hear in your head what I sang into the microphone, a song right in your brain. An amazingly great invention. The apple is real, but you can see a lot of pixels in it, and the pixels are most likely ice, by the way, there are those pixels that give information about the song, motive, words, emotions. In those words, one could make out the singing of Jackie Chan, Kazakh and some Russian words. And a friend said:

“This is more like real music.

And while he walked, I walked behind and sang, pulled out words, danced on the go. I don't know where we went, maybe forty minutes. I started singing in the middle. When he turned around, I, opening my mouth, sang so much that wow! So, I myself liked that I tried to remember this dream. The best way is to do it, write it down right away. But still, I kinda forgot. Exactly, just now I remembered, there was still a teleport in the air, we jumped there, and ended up in the desert. There were also aliens.

What's more, it doesn't even compare to what I saw twenty years ago. Okay, just kidding, it's totally useless. If you remember more falling planets to earth. There, in my dreams, there lived demons and werewolves, turkeys chasing me down a dirty street in the village, I jumped and flew away, hid in the corners on the roof, and wolves got me. They chased me all over the house. I jump out the window, they follow me. I run, they follow me, only a few meters remain, and I’m about to die, when I suddenly fly away, I get on a plane. And I fall from the plane to the pool below and turn into an amphibian man, swim with sharks and fish. And the body is trembling. Several times a minute I die. Dying in a dream is not so scary. A blow, but while you are flying, closing your eyes, you think about something. And bang, and you are already on the floor, lying, there is no pain. The sound of bricks on concrete. That's all.

What are we talking about sleep, yes, about sleep? In this dream, you can drive a car, be a racer, and then realize that you are in a toy car and drive under other huge cars. You come out of the tin can with a machine gun and an Uzi, you kill everyone.

You know, snails are the fastest creatures on earth, and the most patient. You can't even imagine what it's like to eat a small candy all day, and it takes you five days to make it to the kitchen. Well tell me who is more patient than a snail? Is that a stone that stretches to the beach from the bottom of the ocean. Creeps for billions of years.

Between the wallpapers there are several people who know when babies fall from an apple tree and turn into an apricot, that they drive across the sea on a square of mayonnaise, catching the moon from the orbit of Saturn with their feet. If you do not collect a Christmas tree from coal in time, then Santa Claus dies yesterday and does not come the day before yesterday, because he sees the future, and does not invest in dying so soon. But once two boys went hunting and found a red shoe on the road, inside of which the homeless Vitaly was sleeping. He watched Smeshariki and became a sponge, and collected his tears from himself and boiled sweat in a pot to cook soup for breakfast. Thirty-three heroes jumped out of the pot and started tap-dancing until the morning, until their legs went to sleep, and the heroes themselves turned into worms to eat a plum on Mount Rushmore with their friends: a sock, a frying pan,

Looking at the phone screen of a person, the head disappeared and the body sat without a head, immersed in the Internet with its head. Veins pulsing in his neck, Gremlins jumping out of them and eating popcorn, shaking their asses to the rhythm of the dubs. A lone critter flew in, gnawed out a tattoo on his body, he often did this in order to remember that he was a convict and was obliged to kill hope for a brighter future.

Nine blacks lived in the castle on the outskirts of a lonely birch, at the green hill of three eyes, where Shmyga and his seven friends of the hobbits lived. Each had seventeen fingers and a kilo of hair on their feet to walk silently in the name of Loki to steal like a ninja. Only they did not yet know that bison graze for three days on the spot, and leave for the second in advance.

A white whale named Dick, always thought that he was so lonely, alone in the whole world, proud of himself, everyone respected and idolized him, hunted, and then he saw me, found out about me and fell into depression, and hung himself on a waterfall with bubbles of the seas by drinking poison from a deep sea stingray.

- He is worthy, worthy of me, I am glad that I found out about him.

That's what he said to God when he was asked why he hanged himself. And this satisfied God, and then God himself hanged himself, only he could not die, death refused to accept him. God felt sad, and began to thump, so long that he forgot about the people, and everyone on earth began to suffer. Their pleas went unanswered, and in 2020, a Chinese virus appeared altogether, killing a million people. It was the flu of god. God's antibodies began to fight the virus of the earth, to kill the most harmful and unworthy. God's antibodies know who has done a lot of bad things.

Today is already the fourteenth, the same sad month. That day the message came, the next day the message was confirmed. Death jumped off the second floor of the bed and began to dance, twisting threads on her fingers, collecting her belongings for the sixth. Two hundred and forty-seven thousand and ninety-seven people fell into his trap and were eaten, giving birth to millions of suffering scorpions, stinging hummingbirds and leaping cactus leaves.

Five years have passed since the day when sixty months passed, and ravens and geese fell from the sky, informing everyone that penguins and ostriches were flying from the south, and they needed a nest in a tree, and a hole for perches that swim on gravel. The perch drags seven pounds of water in a bag, and a liter of fluff for worms, in the name of the Lord God Buddha Jade.

I don’t know how many years the royal mongoose flew at the foot of the silt, but on the third day after the fifth, a sky of pirates with hooks fell on his head, they tried to catch Santa Claus and steal all his gifts, especially doll pens. But the frost was a cunning piston, he grabbed them one by one and blacklisted the naughty children that all the pirates immediately became chocolates and melted, and they were eaten by a boy with a finger for breakfast before dinner at Gulliver's. The boy did not like the taste of pirates, they tasted somehow old and smelly, that all his teeth fell out and he fell ill with the plague, his body was covered with foam plastic blisters and greasy white, senile hair - this is how the pirates tried to raise their children. Their heads stretched high, but Gulliver cut off their heads and burned them at the stake.

Once Loki came to the Tatars and decided to deceive them and steal all their gold. The Tatars believed him and immediately gave away all the gold.

- Stupid people! - Loki was delighted, and came to the market to pay for the teleport, handed the coins to the seller, and the gold took and melted. These cunning Tatars deceived Loki and gave him chocolate in foil instead of gold. While the chocolate was flying through space, it did not melt, but as soon as it got to the market, it immediately floated away under the sole of the seller. Thor was upset and rolled Loki into a square and made a logic cube out of it.

Surely people think that Beethoven died, but they don’t even assume that Vladimir the rooster from New Hampshire ate him and made him a time of inspiration. That is, a part of the composer flies through the air and getting into the brain of people gives rise to inspiration in writing classical music. And the atoms of the same Raphael, create new pictures, painting, - and, Hemingway - the text, Einstein - theories. Intertwined with each other with different ideological inspirers, new theories and pictures are created. For example, Einstein and Picasso, having got into the brain of a modern person, create fantastic pictures of the future - teleporters, time machines, countdown clocks, resurrection capsules and boots of speed, courage gloves, and, thank me, schizophrenia glasses.

In one planet, dead people die, of course, like on our earth, but suddenly they come to life in their very first photograph, on which he was captured. That is, if a person was photographed from the age of seven months, he comes to life in that photograph and lives there all his life, and when he dies in that one, he falls into the second, where he lives a second life. And he dies when he gets on the very last photo. In a word, people can live in those pictures for centuries and even more, until they completely disappear. We know that now, when we look at photographs of the dead and remember them, we do not assume that he lives in the photograph that was lost forty years ago. And when the children die, he will be transferred to the second, just as lost. And until the last one, which, of course, will also be lost somewhere, because thousands of years will pass,

Only recently I remembered and created worlds, that time was somehow cool, but I forgot that I forgot and I can’t remember. It was something beautiful and amazing. Maybe I'll remember, maybe I'll come up with something new. Now the brain is busy with emptiness and the wind is walking along the skull, hitting the walls of jelly. By the way, we ate that jelly with my grandmother when she said how stupid I was. And then all the jelly left and a void formed there, which was filled with ice cream. It's July and I'm cold, my hair is cream, my skin is milk, my teeth are marshmallows, my legs are marmalade.

But there is on the nine hundred and seventy-third planet from Jupiter, a wonderful planet, where, if you speak, these words fly away around the planet and a person no longer remembers these words, and the imagination that he paints on canvas disappear from memory. Texts are dying. If you sing, the words disappear, the notes die, and people who hear the words receive them into themselves, but if someone does not hear these words, does not see the painting, it disappears forever and ever. And people will never know or know these words again. In the end, people can only save a single word to say goodbye. And people never say goodbye until the very end, because this is the most important word before death in their fleeting universe.

And other creatures live in the neighborhood, what those who have been there say, cry from how they live. It turns out that people who are born there and speak a number live only up to this age. Someone is lucky to die in the nine hundredth year of life, and someone in the first. Even accidentally saying the word "three" before dinner counts as many years of life. If a person does not say a single number up to ten, up to forty or a hundred years, he will live forever, but if you say only one thing, the countdown to his death will begin. For example, at the age of forty-two, Peter said seven, he would die at forty-nine.

Planes from another world were always flying underground, looking for sauerkraut. The cabbage hid under the carrot, and the carrot giggled, and semi-smoked carrots hatched from under it. This is all because queen bees lived under the carrots, stealing DNA particles from both and creating new species, they even took part of the buildings from the plane and created an iron carrot, which they used to dig potatoes, catch worms and go fishing. Not to eat, but to steal the DNA chain from those they capture. Once, bees from magma created a stag beetle that burned the ground and made a tunnel for trains, a subway for cockroaches and moles. They held their portfolios tight and went to the other side of the universe to make more money. That's why planes flew here, because there was more money here than anywhere else in the galaxy.

On Earth, but not a word to anyone, lives Maxim, the son of his son. He sits in the computer all the time, or rather “at”, but he has the ability to get what he sees directly from the picture, and if necessary, then get into the world where he wants, adjusting his hands to the screen like a bridge. So he, once, got to Odin, Hades, Wolverine, Deadpool, Smeshariki, Naruto, and learned a million techniques. Learned what the universe is. He hides his favorite pictures in a folder with folders. He carries a smartphone with him so that when he is attacked by gopniks, he will take out one of the pictures and pull his friends out of there. So, once, he took out a Tyrannosaurus rex, and the dinosaur ate half the block. Somehow Hellboy got it that he smoked half a ton of cigarettes, and fog formed in the city for two days. And remember somehow he took out a magic wand from the phone and accidentally said the wrong spell and ended up at home, in the past, when his mother beat him and was immune to his magic. With one glance, the mother destroyed all magic. The magic phone became ordinary, the power disappeared. And Maxim became a whiny, timid coward.

You probably didn't know Pinnochio very well, because if you knew him as well as I did in my time, you would know that Rapunzel was sitting on his nose all this time, and he was looking under her skirt all these years. Rapunzel didn't even know. But Pinocchio liked it, he did not dare to change his occupation. But when the prince came, he got angry. The lumberjacks came and cut down the castle. For seven nights, Pinocchio bled and died, choking on sawdust.

In one moon of Saturn, there lives a lonely cowboy who eats sausages, and the sausages turn into a stomach. He himself became like a sausage. Freddy, from a family of lonely cannibals, always cried looking at him, then wiped his drool, and went into the sunset, threw a tip, wrapped three hundred kilograms of bags with dried seas, and flew away shouting:

- If the sea were always dry, no one would see tears. And so, someone cried the sea, and it’s sad because they cry, so we have to cry in order to maintain the circulation of the seas of tears in the world.

In one studio, the singer sings the words, looks at the screen and sees everyone who sings songs to himself and invents a motive, he chooses one of them and rivets his song from them. For example, you always sang alone at home, in the shower, in the kitchen, in front of the TV, and you were followed - believe me. Even dances come up with this. You are being broadcast on the studio monitor. They have developed nanobots, the size of an atom, that monitors all people in the world. They calculate the most dissimilar songs and motives in the world, which are not similar to any of the known ones, and show them to the singers in the studios. Even when you quietly pick your nose, people see you, and even listen to your nose squelching - but how can that be, disgusting! You need to squish more beautifully. And then the song comes out, and the dance comes out, and you notice that this is your everything, your motive and your dance. But who will believe you, right? Here is the whole world of plagiarism ... It's a shame, on the one hand, but the cuckoo flies back and forth and says that everything matters. What is the meaning, we have not yet understood, but we trust the cuckoos. Cuckoos won't cheat, will they? They won't say what they don't know. They don’t speak at all, which means they don’t know how to lie.

Pushkin went on stage and read poetry to his fans, the fans threw brushes at him, and said that he was plagiarizing them with his hair. So, in those ancient times, the Fur Brush brand and the fashion for sideburns appeared. Well, it could not be otherwise, what was in fashion was in fashion and everyone tried to follow it. Pushkin himself bought a "fur".

— Perfect! - he said, leaving the restroom, - Almost like me.

Глава 3

Passenger-snake trains floated through space, in which aliens and people boarded, and traveled to other galaxies. The snake could reach the speed of light, maybe even faster. Because she was big. A billiard ball and a real snake, where the balls, planets, and the distance to overcome the entire table, a few seconds. The snake would need to crawl to the neighboring galaxy in just five minutes, and to the most distant, billions of light years ahead, only an hour. It cost nothing, because the snake overcomes this path every day in search of food, in search of dying, fading stars - energy. And he returns home along the same route, to the darkest, farthest corner of the universe - forgotten by God, into a black hole. This is her home, a hole that she has eaten out in space with her huge mouth, wasting billions of energy masses from a billion stars. The snake opens its mouth and with his tongue distributes for each alien his wagon, where he will go to his destination. The snake does not need money, it charges with energy. All people sleep home and wake up with a small dose of energy to go out and get home and sleep. This is a side effect of traveling through the universes. Fuel. All living beings need fuel, and not living beings, to maintain their shape, not to blur, not to be destroyed. But the elephant from the fifth apartment does not need energy, he lives in people's fantasies, and on weekends he creaks with stair railings and boards, and drills a wall, hammers in pedestals, repairs boats and titanics. When people knock on the battery, he disappears and reappears when people are distracted, at the moments of the greatest anger, to play on the nerves. The snake does not need money, it charges with energy. All people sleep home and wake up with a small dose of energy to go out and get home and sleep. This is a side effect of traveling through the universes. Fuel. All living beings need fuel, and not living beings, to maintain their shape, not to blur, not to be destroyed. But the elephant from the fifth apartment does not need energy, he lives in people's fantasies, and on weekends he creaks with stair railings and boards, and drills a wall, hammers in pedestals, repairs boats and titanics. When people knock on the battery, he disappears and reappears when people are distracted, at the moments of the greatest anger, to play on the nerves. The snake does not need money, it charges with energy. All people sleep home and wake up with a small dose of energy to go out and get home and sleep. This is a side effect of traveling through the universes. Fuel. All living beings need fuel, and not living beings, to maintain their shape, not to blur, not to be destroyed. But the elephant from the fifth apartment does not need energy, he lives in people's fantasies, and on weekends he creaks with stair railings and boards, and drills a wall, hammers in pedestals, repairs boats and titanics. When people knock on the battery, he disappears and reappears when people are distracted, at the moments of the greatest anger, to play on the nerves. This is a side effect of traveling through the universes. Fuel. All living beings need fuel, and not living beings, to maintain their shape, not to blur, not to be destroyed. But the elephant from the fifth apartment does not need energy, he lives in people's fantasies, and on weekends he creaks with stair railings and boards, and drills a wall, hammers in pedestals, repairs boats and titanics. When people knock on the battery, he disappears and reappears when people are distracted, at the moments of the greatest anger, to play on the nerves. This is a side effect of traveling through the universes. Fuel. All living beings need fuel, and not living beings, to maintain their shape, not to blur, not to be destroyed. But the elephant from the fifth apartment does not need energy, he lives in people's fantasies, and on weekends he creaks with stair railings and boards, and drills a wall, hammers in pedestals, repairs boats and titanics. When people knock on the battery, he disappears and reappears when people are distracted, at the moments of the greatest anger, to play on the nerves.

On Monday morning, a monkey named Bob comes out of his house, throws a handful of mice into the crocodile's mouth, it starts up like a tractor, rumbles, and swims away to a neighboring island, to work, where Bob catches mice to get back home. He does not understand why he does this, but he is convinced that no matter how stupid the work is, it is work, and all living beings must work so as not to lose their individuality. Even the crocodile that carries Bob across the ocean doesn't eat twice a day, and more than once a year. They even hit it off and buried him in a pond filled with bottled sea cucumber water. The crocodile told how he hatched from an egg and saw how his brothers were running away from him, and he also began to run away - he thought that they were competing. And then, I realized that he was left alone and now must survive and find a way out himself. It was then that Bob found him and raised him on mice and onions, pumpkins and bananas, teaching him that everything else that he does not give him is bad. So, once a neighbor ran up to him, Bob got angry because of something, kicked him out of the house, throwing him from the door, the crocodile saw him, ran up and tore the neighbor in half and ate it. Bob still doesn't know where the neighbor is, but he's happy as a child that he no longer comes in to get sugar for his fruity banana smoothie. The crocodile wanted to tell him everything, but they buried the language in the pond, so he did not want to speak, because without the language he knew only Hungarian, and Bob spoke pure Uzbek. ran up and tore the neighbor in half and ate. Bob still doesn't know where the neighbor is, but he's happy as a child that he no longer comes in to get sugar for his fruity banana smoothie. The crocodile wanted to tell him everything, but they buried the language in the pond, so he did not want to speak, because without the language he knew only Hungarian, and Bob spoke pure Uzbek. ran up and tore the neighbor in half and ate. Bob still doesn't know where the neighbor is, but he's happy as a child that he no longer comes in to get sugar for his fruity banana smoothie. The crocodile wanted to tell him everything, but they buried the language in the pond, so he did not want to speak, because without the language he knew only Hungarian, and Bob spoke pure Uzbek.

But in the room of Henry, an invalid of the first group from the dragon dungeon, there were busts of dolls on the shelf, at night they woke up and counted dust particles in the room, collecting them in a basket, rolling on small carts, pushing off with their handles. Henry beat them all the time for nothing, because when he fell asleep himself, the busts filled his mouth and nose with dust, and pulled out all the hairs from his body, tying him to a hot battery, from where at times, not always, of course, sulfuric acid flowed. That's why he became disabled because he beat those who were smaller than them, but more cunning than Henry himself. Henry mutated one evening, his hands grew out of his head, all his problems became in his throat. Falling asleep, hands strangled him. And then it turned out that these were not his hands, but his father, who disappeared at his birth. He did not know his father at all, and his mother said that he had left. And the mother just swallowed the whole father, and gave birth to Henry. But not all the connection was lost yet, and the father tried to get out of his son, pushing off his son’s head with his hands, which at one moment tore out his head with the spine, apologized and screwed it back on, because in his youth he was a surgeon. When Henry walks through the dungeon, the dragons call an ambulance, or a drug dispensary, and the dogs regurgitate food to feed the poor man. Once, mosquitoes, seeing him, flew up and pumped all the blood that they drank from the dragon. Henry was swollen but survived. All the mosquitoes died then. And now Henry walks the mortal earth and bites everyone, trying to drink blood. The overdose made him addicted. Everyone who came to cure him - an ambulance and a dispensary - died, because when they put a dropper in him, he tore out the throats of doctors and drank their blood, and fried their meat on a fire and shared it with dogs,

We just wanted to say that good people, and they took us and buried us underground with the words:

Good, it means that the harvest is excellent from you, - tightly squeezing spears and shovels. They buried us with a shovel, trampled the earth around our heads with their feet, leaving them above the ground, and guarded us with spears so that no raven would spoil the crop, pecking our eyes and ears. They poured water on us and brushed our teeth so that worms would not breed in us. They were fed with fallen leaves and dust, and on holidays they were given potassium iodide and manure. Hair was cut every two weeks.

These people lived in some kind of different world, their world is different from ours, and they were firmly convinced that children do not appear at all from women during intercourse, but from the earth, like some kind of potato or carrot.

And then, a kung fuist mole flew out of the ground and smeared them on the wall, dug us out and offered to enter his circle of militias. He turned us into moles and we entered the diggers' headquarters. They were all covered in soot, sitting and drinking ale, beer and smoking a couple of cigarettes in a second while we looked at the tables. Then we put the eyes back in and examined them more closely, brushing off the clay and breadcrumbs from them.

“We are all here with you for one reason only, and you know for what reason, should I tell you,” the young mole began, unscrewed the light bulb from the floor, took sugar out of it, sniffed it, and continued:

“People from above are cruel, insidious and will not simply believe us that there is no sense in a buried person, and that in order to get small children, you need not eat women, thinking that they are a marriage, thinking that they are deprived of the pipe of omnipotence. No, ladies and moles, mole people and dystrophic worms, it’s not at all like that. We have to teach them that killing people alive is wrong.

- Yes! everyone shouted, took axes, lasers and blasters from the floor and went up in the elevator. Coming to the surface, they shot, popped, wiped the sweat from their foreheads and said that now they were ready to shoot at people.

And suddenly a rooster, plucked, ran out from behind the barn, crowed so crowed that a tornado rose, broke off all the trees, devastated the forest, making a desert there, and then the clouds fell to the ground altogether, and instead of a field there was an ocean. Moles swam to the edge of the universe, and people who could not swim drowned, and became sharks and rays, lay down on the bottom of the sea, and suffocated with water.

Having lost the meaning of their lives, the moles became nervous that now they would become unemployed and not getting paid would become even worse. Previously, they didn't get it by doing something, and now, by not doing something, they got the same thing, and it was unfair. Therefore, the moles dived into the water, found the corpses of dead sharks there, tore them to pieces, made canned food and began to sell in the Turkish market. They sold them for nothing, but for them to do something. And while working, they did not receive anything and were happy, like a ball that was kicked into the lava of indifference.

We looked at all this, twisted a finger at the temple, but the finger did not twist, so we drilled a hole with a nail.

Since they all died before their time, we must teach others! - somehow yelled another, gray-haired mole, taking out a grenade and a chainsaw from a bag. He brushed his teeth with a chainsaw, puffed up his stomach with a grenade to look around from a height for people nearby. Then he lowered himself, burped, and said that it was possible in another way.

“Here,” he said, “there are women and they need to be caught and forced to give birth to warriors for us, only one thing I can’t understand how we, small ones, can be able to give birth to such a strong warrior with such a big creature, like themselves. That young mole pulled out a magic wand and turned him into a man with words, now you are alpha. Sweat for all of us. He sat down in the sun and began to sweat. He only did not understand why he was ordered to do so, but such was the order, so he sat and sweated. So he withered and died in an hour. It has been ground into a powder, made into a seasoning, and eaten for dinner with potatoes and pasta.

Under one stone, far from that place, by God, farther than mercury from the earth, there was a beautiful world "nowhere", and there lived magical dragons that flew out from under it, soared up and turned into a rainbow. People looked at the rainbow and wondered. And the dragon flew like this, from one end of the world to the other. Raindrops jumped on his back and rejoiced, sang songs, composed stories, and traveled from one country to another without passports. It used to be that huge trolls walked along that rainbow, invisible, the dragon commanded his magic in such a way that everything that stepped on it immediately became invisible to the eyes of any motherfucker.

We were sitting by the fire and warming ourselves, when suddenly a small rabbit jumped out of the clouds, waved a club and said that he was looking for a man for sparring, so, you see, to play cricket on the clouds. I stood up, proudly replied that I was ready, grabbed him by the tail and we flew away. Arriving at that place, I was amazed, but just like that, Hades, Zeus, Poseidon, Perseus and Athena opposed us.

- We are finished, you see, - I said, and hit the ball, and broke the opponents' goal. The gods lowered their heads and wept. “You, strong man, we admit defeat,” and they brought me an armful of straw so that I could sleep on it, a sea of food and drink, a hundred girls and guys. I shook my head, I told them: - There is no need for me to spoil the food here, take them away. Get the girls out!

They threw them out of the cloud, they crashed into the sea, and on the rocks, and on that they agreed that they would never again mix good with disgusting.

Then Hercules joined us, or rather me, after a long and difficult struggle against his wife, which he lost, and was going to the factory, but you see, there’s nothing for him to sit without work and fight all the time. His wife kicked him out, so he came to me and cried, so much so that the seas rose, the tsunami covered Madagascar with a wave and washed away India:

- I, - he says, - is a man, strong of this world, why should I work, I don’t need this, I like to help people! - dug his teeth into my shoulders and pulled them out, chewed, spat, then hugged, apologized, my head flew out of the body. I got up, dusted myself off, put my head back in, and consoled him that everything would be fine. He patted him on the shoulder, he coughed up gorgon guts, brushed Dave Jones' claws from behind his teeth, and sobbed as hard as he could. — Bro! Yes, you are a real man, - and hit me in the face, and I flew off to the neighboring galaxy. I took out binoculars from my pocket and peered, and he waves his hands from the clouds, thanks me, calls me back. So, I found in that galaxy a bat that flew away from the earth in those distant days, sat on it and developed a speed greater than light and flew back.

The mouse sat down, drank my blood, wiped its mouth, and saw that the Pegasi were flying towards it, but to gut it, and people smelled the smell of a mouse, and let the bat not know where to hide. I smiled, said that it was nothing bad, they, these weak ones, would never get here. Jack climbed onto the cloud and the giants followed him, and unexpectedly, they uncorked the skull of Hercules, so that they could eat the brain and become stronger, and they see it is empty. Hercules closed his skull, slowly turned to them and whispered:

What are you doing, young people? - squeezed one of the giants and divided it in two, and threw it out of the cloud, and sees that something, some kind of stalk has grown to his state, slid down it, I follow him, and we are standing at the old hut, where Baba Yaga fries children , and sat down at the table, taking out large wooden spoons and a huge bowl for meat from the windowsill. The most fragrant was the smell of a child, they put it on the table, and we began to eat, and dip it in salt, like in sauce, when suddenly the baby opened his eyes and said to us: - How slow you are! - and he himself, opening his mouth to us, crawled into our stomach. Nothing, we were surprised, and did not close our mouths, put the spoons aside, and the pieces fly and fly. Baba Yaga scratched her head, and howled that her husband was hiding somewhere here, and let's look under the beds and behind the stove. — Dumbledore! she shouted. “Come out, damned devil, you’re kidding me again, spoiling all the food!” - I'm sorry, coming out from behind the cup, slowly growing up, the old man said, and sat down at the table with us, uncorked a bottle of whiskey, poured a couple of drops of golden potion into it, and drank it, - It was funny! You spoil everything, old woman, do not let the peasants be children! I would roast you for this! “Yes, it was only yesterday,” Yaga yelled, “you had enough for ten seconds, and how you succumb to the spell of time, and repeat ten seconds an hour, and say that an hour without stopping!” Your magic, but in the household! and how you succumb to the spell of time, and repeat ten seconds an hour, and say that an hour without stopping! Your magic, but in the household! and how you succumb to the spell of time, and repeat ten seconds an hour, and say that an hour without stopping! Your magic, but in the household!

Dumbledore wilted, got up from the table, waved his stick, turned Yaga into a girl, so beautiful, sweet, and closed the lid and sent it to the oven. Yaga screamed and screamed, then she came out sweaty with a wreath in her hands.

- Something today the bathhouse is rather weak.

Coming out of the oven, Yaga became herself, old, because she dried up in the oven and wrinkled.

I swallowed my saliva, looked at the plate of meat and thought, it turns out that this meat is old under the guise of young ones. It turns out that if you fry and cook young meat, it will still become old and lose its vitamin taste?

No, that won't do, I thought to myself and flew out the window, but only Hercules grabbed my leg and said:

- And you will leave me alone with this beauty, I will eat it alone and will not share it with you? - Yes, you eat, obscene Gerka! I shouted, kicked in the face, and flew away, and the mouse flew after me.

And he really tore off all her limbs and ate it just like that, because she was already ready, and it didn’t matter to Hercules what kind of meat to eat. Then they went out to Dumbledore from the hut, and climbed back along the stalk, and there, at the top, it means Jack was sitting, watching TV, and what kind? Yes, this is God's, where human life is shown. He switched to the one he loves and became a stalker. He eats chips, in ten minutes he became an elephant, rang in his trunk, and made a hole in a cloud right over Africa with a weight and fell into the desert, where the elephants immediately noticed him and began to beat him so that he would fulfill his fatherly duties in the future, and they wanted him to close up he them children. They surrounded him and beat him with a log and beat him for forty days and forty years, until Jack agreed. Now he holds a suitcase in his hands and goes to work, to a foundry, and brings thirty-seven wives a salary, and that's what they feed him, what a promise. He became thin, weak, and only ate air. And one day, he wanted to run away, he took it, got up, jumped off the tree in order to die and become free, but the wind picked it up like an autumn leaf, and threw it away on the Amazon, where Amazonian elephants beat him, locked him in a cage, and every evening surrogate women of easy virtue entered the cage in order to close up the Amazon warriors. It was then that the wonder woman Gal Gadot was born, and began to protect the earthly world. in order to close up the warriors of the Amazons. It was then that the wonder woman Gal Gadot was born, and began to protect the earthly world. in order to close up the warriors of the Amazons. It was then that the wonder woman Gal Gadot was born, and began to protect the earthly world.

Hercules looked with me at Jack, and wondered how he had not yet seduced all the women on the planet with such charisma. He wiped the sweat from his forehead, and threw out the bone, that bone flew right into the cage, ate Yaginsky's elephant bone, and became magical, clapped his huge ears and raised the whole island, and flew into space, where everyone immediately died without air and became zombies, and began infect the living with death. Dumbledore waved then, and opened a portal to an unknown world, where he threw all of them with that damned island, and closed the dimension. Those elephants that did not know how to fly still walk there, bite each other, and the more they bite, the more they are. And when one of them only remains as a skeleton, the one that is a skeleton will bite the other and grow a body on it. So they fed each other from hunger, and no one complained. They gorge themselves, and go happy, building skyscrapers, building starships, writing the bible. Among them was even the composer Stephen King, the maestro of his craft, but unnecessary deeds. Every evening before going to bed, he sang opera, wrote notes and classical music, then, when everyone fell asleep to the sounds, he played dandy, hiding them from everyone. Strongly loved that composer to pass Looney Tunes.

Meanwhile, while Hercules and I are sitting on a cloud, something amazing happens at the same time with them. You see, time is something other than something, let's say, than gravity, although, you look at it, gravity is time itself. Only now, you know, in the fifth galaxy of the constellation Pisces, there are people who lengthen with time, that is, let's say that when we fall asleep we become five centimeters larger at night, and they, look, walk along the ground, and the clock is already ten in the morning, and they were ten meters taller. It’s not just that this happens to us, but only because we relax like real drug addicts, if it’s so amazing, but I’m just lying, no, not drug addicts, but those people actually lengthen according to the laws of magic. It's one o'clock in the morning, and so, falling asleep at twenty-two in the evening, they are twenty-two meters, right? And at one in the morning, they are only a meter in size, and after midnight, oh my god, they're only micron sized, like dust. And centimeters are added to them. And imagine how they walk after midnight, and their current size becomes small, and the distance they are, a meter apart, suddenly becomes a billion miles, because they are so tiny. It turns out that, a distant proximity. They say that when they lengthen, if you look from the moon, you will confuse them with poles, and you will knock them down while driving a car, although there is still truth in this, because their eyes glow at night, like real lanterns, and, walking along the alley, you can see the oncoming, blinding gaze of a passerby, therefore, they close their eyes when a meter remains between them. But, this does not help at all, because shining into themselves, they become even blinder because of the spotlights. Therefore, when two lights collide, the universe collapses and another galaxy in a pocket dimension is born. That is, do not believe it, ha, but what is there to guess, believe me, how! You see, their gaze creates a collision of two streams of light, an explosion with the power of a small galaxy. And this explosion, they move to another place where planets and other worlds are created, where, for example, we live, and many other endless creatures.

And then the green beans fly to them, take over their world while they sleep, thinking that the world is uninhabited, planting eggplants, tomatoes, raising children, and building factories, when suddenly, an unfortunate mistake happens, and the elongating people, growing up, exterminate them, thinking, that they brought their morning breakfast. In a hurry, the beans run underground, and hide, and stretching to the surface, crawl down again, so that only those people do not pull them out of the ground, from the nest and exterminate the beans when they see a pod above the clay. And imagine this, clay, red, hard, boring in all respects, from which Galileo sculpted a castle to play cars, erected garages, and in the evenings closed the doors of buildings under an alarm, that's the same clay, ordinary. They didn’t have the usual peat there, where they threw peas, and marshmallows grew from there,

And in the nine thousand one hundred and first world, which is closer to us, but still farther than the largest world, where aliens live the size of a pin, but with the impact force of a massive Betelgeuse star that can destroy our galaxy with a flutter of eyelashes, shadows live, that feed on the hope, pain and memories of all worlds from all dimensions and multiverses. Therefore, we have pain in order to feed them, so that they live, and so that we live, losing pain and memories. It happens like this, somehow, leaving the room for some reason, we forget what we wanted to do, and at that moment, the shadows captured our memory, and when, suddenly, it hurts us and we cry, and tomorrow it’s already pain disappears, it is they who absorb them. And, the hope that is suddenly created in our hearts that it will rain today, they also absorb and there is still no rain. And shadows then, you see, and, trying not to have them at all (maybe we are afraid of the night because they are scary, and fear is generated because the shadows do it themselves), that's what they exist to watch. Ah, it's boring to read all this, something is not like the whole book, but the story is the same, the story isn't it? And who is this, wait, walking from one page to another? And, this is this, this, like him, Marquis de Sans, absorber and stainer of the canvas, look, oh, bastard, he has an eraser in his hands, he runs from page to page and erases the fairy tales written by me, only now, I let the ferret out of his chest, which he kept for such occasions, and see, look. Hush! Well, where did you turn away again? The marquis runs, and the ferret follows him, bites him in the ass, Sans screams, hides behind an eraser, threatens to erase me from the pages of my own books, and indeed, threatens to get into my world, slip into the past, my father was not there, and that my mother would never meet him. But it looks like the ferret turned out to be strong, grabbed the Marquis by the scruff of the neck and leads him somewhere, to himself, probably to sweep the floor in the chest. So it is, looked there with one eye, and the Marquis was running around with a shovel, put on a cap on his head, put on slippers and an apron. He is angry, you see, pulling the chain around his neck, trying to pull it out of the walls, but not tied to the wall, but to the ferret. You wake him up, he bites off one of your fingers, so, what are we talking about, yes, that's all, the poor Marquis has only seven fingers left, and surprisingly, they grow all the time. Oh, let's get out of there. He shook the pages, blew on the sheets, wow, how much rubber, he still tried to erase the stories. probably to sweep the floor in the chest. So it is, looked there with one eye, and the Marquis was running around with a shovel, put on a cap on his head, put on slippers and an apron. He is angry, you see, pulling the chain around his neck, trying to pull it out of the walls, but not tied to the wall, but to the ferret. You wake him up, he bites off one of your fingers, so, what are we talking about, yes, that's all, the poor Marquis has only seven fingers left, and surprisingly, they grow all the time. Oh, let's get out of there. He shook the pages, blew on the sheets, wow, how much rubber, he still tried to erase the stories. probably to sweep the floor in the chest. So it is, looked there with one eye, and the Marquis was running around with a shovel, put on a cap on his head, put on slippers and an apron. He is angry, you see, pulling the chain around his neck, trying to pull it out of the walls, but not tied to the wall, but to the ferret. You wake him up, he bites off one of your fingers, so, what are we talking about, yes, that's all, the poor Marquis has only seven fingers left, and surprisingly, they grow all the time. Oh, let's get out of there. He shook the pages, blew on the sheets, wow, how much rubber, he still tried to erase the stories. what are we talking about, yes, that’s all, the poor Marquis has only seven fingers left, and surprisingly, they grow all the time. Oh, let's get out of there. He shook the pages, blew on the sheets, wow, how much rubber, he still tried to erase the stories. what are we talking about, yes, that’s all, the poor Marquis has only seven fingers left, and surprisingly, they grow all the time. Oh, let's get out of there. He shook the pages, blew on the sheets, wow, how much rubber, he still tried to erase the stories.

We flew on the first spring leaves to the planet Arachnid, where, you already understood, spiders live, only these spiders are scientists, the real ones. Here one runs with a textbook in his hands to a physics lesson, and the other walks slowly after him, to a physical education lesson. The third hovers right above the astronomy department on a golden lion with a purple mane that biologists have grown in a chemistry and genetic engineering class. Scientists look at the sky, observe the world. Far from them there is a planet of Snakes, they are sometimes afraid of them, therefore they always look, sometimes with one eye, sometimes with their whole eye, so that the snakes do not attack them. All eight eyes are watching the outbreak of snake civilization. They were lucky that they are scientists, and snakes only crawl on the sand and eat mice on their planet, and they hide from giant hedgehogs that they cannot catch. Hedgehogs are like mountains, trees and forests grow on their backs.

Aragil, the spider boy, was born a long time ago, he only feels that he was born on the wrong planet, and therefore only one went to the lesson more diligently than everyone else, studied all subjects, taught everything in order to build a ship and fly away from his relatives to where there is something besides them and infinitely yellow stones spread all over the world. New civilizations, beings. And a miracle happened to him, about which he dreamed for so long, dreamed all his life, it was not in vain that he, as they say, worked for his own sake. After graduating, dear, maybe formidable, who knows, our spider built a hitherto unseen ship on fuel from tellurium-128, which is abundant on the planet and does not need to be recreated in some laboratories there, like people on their planet (although people have not yet developed to this technology, many million years will pass before that). He sat down on his creation, flew up like a butterfly, circled over the relatives, and shouted to them that adventures awaited him in the world, which they know about only through telescopes, and rushed into the abyss, pitch-black space. Only the paws were moving, seeing off the astronaut. Aragil saw the most dangerous things on his way, many terrible planets he could not even imagine.

So, somehow circling around a green, huge tree on the planet Feriagoaenol, he noticed that he was getting younger here every minute. He would have stayed here, lived a little, only he was completely afraid of becoming a baby, tiny, and then he would not be able to climb onto the ship, get the pedals with his paws, and he would not have had the strength to move the levers. Sometimes it happens that youth is the death of everything, that's why Aragil flew away. And those trees were always green and young. On the next planet, everything was also green, only there were more predators on one square meter than all his brothers on the entire planet Arachnid. And I had to leave this one, and the third didn’t smell of danger at all, but here, unlike other worlds where I visited, everything was dazzlingly cool, so excellent and dizzying that stay here and eat everything your mouth can eat, run there, where you can not climb, jump and fly. What is wrong with that planet? Yes, there was something that worried Aragil, so these are the amazing things that happened to his body. Here, once he lay down, he stood up, and there remained his double, a clone, separated in time. What is it you ask? And here's what. Every moment you don’t visit is imprinted on the surface of that planet, in a word, when the grass sways in the wind, it clones itself to the place where the paw of the original reaches, so, for example, one grass recreated around itself a million of its own kind without any or dispute. And Aragil, running through the fields, climbing rocks, swimming in the waters, left behind himself, clones who ran the same way, ate, fought, that once they tried to kill the original, but only got confused, did not understand who is who. Created different types of weapons but the brain was the same as that of the original, all thoughts, and started a war, and who was a clone, who was not, they did not understand. Aragil quickly flew away from there, and the clones remained to fight. How many of them there were uncountable, probably, only one was left alive, surviving, having killed the last one. Whether he flew out by building a ship, the gods do not know.

On the fourth planet, Aragil found peace. Some smell hitherto never known to him pierced his olfactory receptors, and his head was spinning, and the spider felt that paradise was here. And having come to his senses, losing strength, the spider, and which he always was, a scientist in the first place, realized that this surface intoxicates with death, a terrible poison, and then, instead of staying and enjoying, Aragil boarded his ship and created a helmet that will protect him from the effects of such things, and went out back, but this time to explore the world. And Aragil realized that the smell was not only a pleasure, and not only brought the pleasure of smelling, but also recreated Eden around a scorched planet, wherever you look the fire is blazing, sand is chasing along the surface, and rats are crawling along the ditches, where there was once a stream, which and spray that poison to eventually eat the afflicted. The rats released poison more and more, seeing the unwanted, but not averse to eating, and Aragil kicked those, and the rats crawled under the stone, and some of them, running out, became sand and circling, flew away beyond the horizon. There was something else surprising that the sand, flying away, created a hurricane, then flew to the very top of the highest mountain, and turned into a huge monster, hardly resembling a rat. Having opened its mouth, from the sides of which there are daggers, and on the dagger there are thousands of teeth, four, in a word, two from the bottom side, two from the top, released a poisonous gas, and covered the entire planet. The creatures that flew to this planet were doomed to be eaten. There was no doubt that it was impossible to live here. Meanwhile, some animals crawled over the stones, creatures similar to stingrays, they hardly touched the ground, but glided over it, as if on a magnetic cushion. Those rats were afraid of them, and hid. The creature ate poison and fed exclusively on death, sucking sand into its mouth. Even that huge monster, seeing a stingray, crawled into a crack on a rock. I had to fly away from here too, but how those monsters did not grab onto Aragil himself, one has only to think out. Maybe because the spider did not emit poison, maybe because he was afraid of an unknown creature.

The fifth planet went in checkmate. Here the planet was a chessboard, as if. White and black square earth loomed over the surface. And what is it here? Who knows, but there was no grass, no trees, no animals, and even more so no poison. There was nothing at all here. And then Aragil realized that this world is terrible. Those strips were dimensional holes, sucking in they threw them into some universe, and flew out of the white thing broken. And after all, you won’t know whether it will throw the black one into the dimension or immediately throw it out through the white one after chewing it into pieces. Here Aragil did not linger even for a minute. He waved his paw, threw out a tennis ball, and was pleased with that.

How many planets did he have to visit before he found the earth. And guess what, it was so easy. And sometimes, not everything is what it seems. It would seem that the spider was huge, and people shouted “how huge”, but, unfortunately, the laws of that land made it small. The earth was kind and humane, she did not try to kill, devour or hypnotize, but the spider became lonely, and he flew away from there too. It was impossible for him to stop at dozens of planets, and still not see the infinite.

Seven days at the speed of light, a billion miles, many thousands of planets, but nothing to like. The spider already thought that there was no such world in the universe, until he found a small planet on the edge of the universe, and it’s green here, and it’s fresh and the smell is cozy, the stream flows over the stones, tiny hummingbirds fly in the sky, rabbits with three eyes and a tail run on the ground a scorpion, and a mermaid sits on a lone tree, dousing herself with sugar syrup. And on all this miracle, a tiny house is set up, and a man runs near the house, waters the rose, rearranges the chair from one side to the other, watches the dawn, drinks tea and sighs. Day the spider circled on the ship on the dark side of the moon, watching and studying. The man went into the house, fell asleep, watered the roses in the morning, dug the ground in the evening and planted new ones. “He must be lonely,” thought Aragil. The man walked and laughed and spent the whole day looking into the abyss of space, making tea and sitting again. How long it would have continued if Aragil had not descended to the planet, of course, having thought to put on a helmet, and that man was breathing without him, it is even more surprising that there is no atmosphere. A man was sleeping at that time, Aragil looked out the window, dozed, he was tired in any other way. On the shelf next to the bed was a book: The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain. Suddenly, someone touched him and spoke, Aragil turned around, and there stood a rose and smiled, wondering if he was a friend or came to capture the human world. Small stalks bent down, the leaves swayed on them from side to side. Aragil did not know how to smile, and instead of a smile, an evil grin turned out, the rose recoiled back and trembled. having figured out to put on a helmet, and that person was breathing without it, it is even more surprising that there is no atmosphere. A man was sleeping at that time, Aragil looked out the window, dozed, he was tired in any other way. On the shelf next to the bed was a book: The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain. Suddenly, someone touched him and spoke, Aragil turned around, and there stood a rose and smiled, wondering if he was a friend or came to capture the human world. Small stalks bent down, the leaves swayed on them from side to side. Aragil did not know how to smile, and instead of a smile, an evil grin turned out, the rose recoiled back and trembled. having figured out to put on a helmet, and that person was breathing without it, it is even more surprising that there is no atmosphere. A man was sleeping at that time, Aragil looked out the window, dozed, he was tired in any other way. On the shelf next to the bed was a book: The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain. Suddenly, someone touched him and spoke, Aragil turned around, and there stood a rose and smiled, wondering if he was a friend or came to capture the human world. Small stalks bent down, the leaves swayed on them from side to side. Aragil did not know how to smile, and instead of a smile, an evil grin turned out, the rose recoiled back and trembled. and there stood a rose and smiled, wondering if he was a friend or had come to take over the world of man. Small stalks bent down, the leaves swayed on them from side to side. Aragil did not know how to smile, and instead of a smile, an evil grin turned out, the rose recoiled back and trembled. and there stood a rose and smiled, wondering if he was a friend or had come to take over the world of man. Small stalks bent down, the leaves swayed on them from side to side. Aragil did not know how to smile, and instead of a smile, an evil grin turned out, the rose recoiled back and trembled.

“I’m not an enemy, a traveler and a scientist,” the spider replied, and the rose immediately hugged him and greeted the guest in a cheerful way:

We love friends.

Who knows why they understood the language of spider roses, maybe the spider spoke the language of roses, or maybe the planet was so magical that all languages are understandable here.

Whether a minute passed or an hour, dawn was already on the planet, a man came out with a cup of tea, stretched and sat on a chair, stars blinked in the distance, comets flew near the planet, and here, just a mile further than the comet, Voyager 1 flies, frozen, covered with ice , but still blinking and sending signals. After drinking tea, the man rearranged his chair, sat down, took out a book from his bosom, and seeing Aragil dropped it. From surprise, of course. He did not drop the tea, there was no tastier tea in the universe.

“Hello,” the man hissed, still in amazement, but what can we hide, from utter surprise, even the hair on the body stood on end, if only they were, “Where are you from here?

“Hello,” Aragil clattered, “from there,” pointing at the stars with a glance, “my home is far from here.”

“Well,” the man smiled, “I don’t often have guests, sit down, I’ll pour you tea,” pointing to a chair, only the spider didn’t need a chair, “I hope you like tea?”

- Tea? Don't know. I will love. Everything has a beginning. Pour.

Having poured tea, they sat down in front of the sun, there were only two of them, and both, on one side, the spider on the ground, the man on a chair. Aragil told where he came from, and told a story about other worlds, and that moles are different in dimensions, and there are planets that look like paradise, but this is an illusion, and then added that he is a scientist and travels on a ship built by him, and that there are many like him, smart, but remained to live on Arachnid.

“Yeah, I see, so you are a traveler, a star wanderer,” the man nodded, sipping from a cup, and picked up the book. She was just lying under a chair, “Have you read about the earth?”

- I visited the earth, but it's lonely there. Everything is there, only a lot of sadness is in the air. It can be seen, and you were empty there, flew away and settled here, to be alone with roses.

“With roses, it’s not loneliness anymore. Good company. They are my children, - looking up, an eel immediately flew over him, and with a flash burst, sparkling with lightning, he disappeared behind the neighboring planet, - No, I have never been on earth.

How did you end up here without being there?

“Who knows how, but the book was there, I was raised by roses, now it's my time to take care of them. Having learned to read, once having opened a book, I wanted the same world as the earth, huge and boundless. Apparently it's good there. Where there are those to whom you are dear, it cannot be a bad place, - opening the book, the man pointed to the picture of two boys, they joyfully ran, shouted out some words, the picture moved without words, only one thing was clear, those boys were happy - You yourself flew out of the house, because it was lonely among the same as you, - turned the page, there the boys were already sitting on a tree, and around the forest, behind the forest there was a large clearing, many houses, and joyful old people. Then the man looked at the tree in front of him, the mermaid was sitting leaning from it and reading another book, combing her hair, giggling, turning the pages and wiping away tears. Looks like a tragicomedy, nothing else. Only the image of the tentacles was visible on the cover.

“I can’t deny it,” replied Aragil, and sighed deeply, whether to take off his helmet or not, that’s what he thought about, and in the meantime the tea was cooling.

- Why are you sitting in a headdress? – as if hearing the spider’s prayer, the man uttered a word, and Aragil took off his helmet and sighed a second time, deeper. There was no cleaner air in his life, not spoiled by anyone, the cosmic wind circulated oxygen around the planet. The air lingered here by magic, there can be no other way, no blue sky, no red, no green or yellow, only a planet and beyond space. Taking a sip of warm tea, almost hot, the spider clattered, trembled, goosebumps ran through his body, chelicerae in his mouth rattled, and the spider realized that he loved tea.

So why don't you fly?

“Someday,” the tea was already cooling, the steam rose up, then gravity pulled it to the ground. Rosa sang merrily behind the backs of the two, jumped, smiled, reached for the sun, then tired, yawned, bowed her head and closed her eyes.

Aragil understood everything, a person cannot leave the one who is dear to him. They agreed on that, finished drinking tea, leafed through the book, the story was told by an unknown person without a name, then he waved his hand and said goodbye to the spider. Aragil would have stayed a little longer, he was superfluous, it was crowded for two, and there were five of them.

On the next planet, in a different universe, where dragons played ping-pong, zebras regulated pedestrian crossings, and eagles controlled the speed in animal traffic lanes, one could live and not know any troubles, but even then Aragil turned around and flew away, there was no soul, the comfort of that home. Here the crowd made the lonely soul even stronger, everyone had someone, relatives, friends, only the spider frightened everyone, and shied away from him. Where they are afraid of him, it was not worth lingering.

A few months have already passed, and nothing of the planets in the universe has been passed, and the spider has not passed a fraction of billions of galaxies, and, to be sure, continued to wander on. Flying, one day, and falling asleep with a book in his hands, which he wrote himself, the whole spidery story of the adventure, dropping his pen on the floor, sniffing, twitching his paw in half-asleep, Aragil had a dream, when suddenly something loudly flew into the side. Something flashed outside the window. There was a knock on the door. Who could be in the middle of space, because not a single planet for many millions of kilometers? We don't know, but the knock was repeated again, hit three times. If the earth were outside, we would definitely hear the cry of the creature that asks to be let in, but only - this is an open space of space. Aragil shuddered and opened his eyes, and rushed to the entrance, whether to take risks or not, the scientist did not think, he knew that the risk was great. Asking who is there, that is still a stupid idea, therefore, having taken a holographic DNA key from his pocket, he turned the keyhole, and a capsule with oxygen was formed in front of the entrance, the pressure in it dropped, and the door opened. There was no one in the void, but a quiet thank you was heard, and feet stamped along the board, and sitting on an armchair, it lowered its back and sighed.

- I won’t stay in debt, is there something to eat?

Aragil closed the door and patted the invisible guest, sat down on the floor, and the chelicerae knocked, demanding an answer. Without waiting for a good attitude from the guest, the spider took out a couple of eggs, fruits, frozen canned condensed milk from the whole milk of hedgehogs from the cryo-refrigerator, then placed it in front of the guest.

The bottle was uncorked and the condensed milk was drunk, all the fruits were eaten, the eggs also flew into his bottomless stomach.

“Forgive me for no call, you know, there are no telephones in space,” the stranger finally answered, only Aragil did not know where to look, because he looked at the back of the chair, past his head. The stranger suddenly stood up, you could hear it, and you could see how the chair jumped up, and, apologizing, took off something that looked like a bracelet from his hand, and smiled. For the first time, someone was not afraid of the sight of Aragil, - Hell, - he nodded, - a year has passed by the clock, well, how long have you been! The unification of cosmic forces was in no hurry to save me. What department are you from?

— Department?

— Yes, Yunga, space sailor, which one are you from? Of these aliens? How many of you divorced in the thousand and eleventh century. Off the record, have you seen a small saucer that looks like a soap dish somewhere?

- Soap dish? – Aragil had never heard this word, but apparently, the man decided that he was asking again for the sake of decency.

- Well, yes, teleportation, lower-tier atom converter, come on, why are you giving a fool?

- I don't understand. It looks like you have me confused with someone else.

- With whom? With a toaster? You must be one of those new ones that just arrived after I was gone. Probably already lost their commander? Give me your dog tag, I'll report on you and your incompetence and lack of education.

Aragil came closer, looked at the man and said that he did not know any such places, and for the first time he heard about some atoms there, and he had no idea what it was. In the meantime, the man was rummaging around the ship, searching for something for himself, nothing else, and saw a book on the floor by the chair, took it and read it all, laughing, Aragil silently watched.

- You have a talent for writing, have you tried enrolling in courses? There are no such planets in the world, such worlds do not exist, except in your head. Eh, mothers gave birth to all sorts of dreamers and dreamers, neither to read a book, nor to study space from all sorts of tomes, and right away they write something like this.

- All this is true, - Aragil jumped up, tried to smile, but nothing came of it, he grinned maliciously again, and the man jumped back, thinking that the spider was attacking.

Did you decide to attack? You will be hanged and burned in the sun for this!

For a long time Aragil explained his origin, and finally, unable to bear the stupidity of a human, he flew along the old course to the planet that was closest. Stopping, let's say, after forty minutes of silent flight, the man put on his spacesuit, then a bracelet on his arm, and they went to the surface of that planet where zebras walked, eagles flew and crocodiles swam on the asphalt. A man immediately fell on his backside and gasped, sand rose, that books and small people don’t know much, that it’s such a magical place in the universe, and intelligent animals that have their own laws, creatures that build their cities. But how stupid was that man that, when he saw Aragil, he did not think that there were many millions like him, and all sorts of different ones. The man apologized, and they went to the market to buy something important. There was nothing important here. On the shelves lay junk, whom he had never seen anywhere, and turning around they boarded the ship and flew away. The pensioner snake sold socks for snakes, stockings, blankets, they differed only in length and thickness from each other. A hyena crammed false teeth made of sharp-rooted stones, and a giraffe vehemently advertised an ointment against neck lengthening. But they didn’t help a damn thing, the socks slipped off the tails of the snakes, the teeth fell off, and the ointment made the neck sticky, but not short.

“Well, since you told the truth, I have nothing to lose, and it looks like they lost me,” the man said, “By the way, my name is Johnny Kekk.

“Aragil,” snapped the spider, and asked how he got here and, of course, how he had survived for so long.

- Yes, just everything, how to multiply three hundred million by four hundred and forty-three thousand and twelve. It was like this, my friend and I in this important matter, to be honest, to destroy the parasites around our planet, and this parasite was huge, a little less than the moon, a little more, and would completely knock the moon out of orbit. So, we fought with him, and he, with such strength, hit me with his tail and threw me into a black hole, which he himself created. And it’s not a hole anyhow, but the size of a truck, for sure there isn’t enough strength for more. It sucked me into this place, into the void of Bootes, and floated here, hardly remaining alive.

— What about the food?

- Yes. The most important thing is food, so that's it. I got food directly from space, you know, there are a lot of microorganisms in the universe, and my suit collects them and does all sorts of cool things, for example, it can make pizza, in a word, which is enough for mind and imagination. Prepare and eat. Only damn it, it's always cold. Chewed such food for a whole year, breathed the same way. Our costume was created by the smartest people in my world, that oxygen is obtained directly from space, there is a whole universe of this oxygen, you just need to filter it correctly. That's how I survived, believe it or not, but that's the truth. And I see, I’m happy like that, something is flying this morning, I was delighted, but I almost choked on a sausage while I was surprised. I thought that they found me by the gps sensor, and this is you, just. I went on board and I think, well, what a scarecrow dressed up, degenerated into clowning. And here is the thing for you, you are a real spider. It is clear now that no one needs me. They left me to die, or the people themselves died. Well, what a century it is, huh! Throw people to the mercy of fate.

- What happens, you got here from the future? - Aragil was surprised, and stared with all his eyes, wanting to hear the truth.

- You mean from the future? What is the year now?

- The last time on earth when I traveled was the twenty-first century, the twentieth year. That's what it said in the papers.

- Damn you! - Johnny shouted, got up and began to walk back and forth, - it turns out that I will not see my son again. That's why they can't find me. In this time, there are no our technologies, which means that the way here is closed, and in general, it turns out that there is a billion infinite universes, maybe even in each there is me. They will mix it up and take the wrong one, so they will suffer. And that I, the fool the fool!

Then he leaned back in his chair and grinned, saying that with you I will fly, wherever you are, there I am. And they flew together into the world, into all sorts of new universes, again to be surprised at the unknown.

And, you may not believe me, they knocked a second time, on the same door. Well, they found me a passage yard here! This time they did not open it, but what a surprise it was when the door was kicked out and God stood on the platform. He closed the door, soldered it with his finger, and by clicking made a second chair, and sat down in it. He took out the chips and laughed.

“Go on, don’t stare at me. You don't have to pay attention to me. I also have some business where you are flying. Look at the road, you'll hit the comet. Hey, hey, spider, carefully on the turns, here, among other things, poodles and cockatoos are flying, throwing a handful of chips. Scratching his belly, he looked at the two, and turned around, - What did you see there? Do I have Pushkin or something in the back? Come on, get him away from me.

It was impossible to confuse that god with anyone - this is Thor, Mjolnir lies between his legs. Perhaps not Thor, but he clearly played his role and played, by the way, beautifully. Standing up, throwing a pack on a chair, he went to the steering wheel, and craned his neck, looking at the planets under the ship.

“Spider, listen, how is your father, Arahdrg?” What a complicated name he has, yes. Look, don’t miss that planet here, - pointing with your finger at a tiny dot that they could hardly see through a telescope, but he, you see, he saw it with his eye, without anything, - You are not in a hurry like that, take a break, fly forty-three more days, get some forces, there, you know, uh, you would know what is being built! You will definitely need strength. Feel free to make yourself at home here, I'll be right back. Call me Fulcrum. It will be easier if they bow and call the Almighty. I'll be back soon, - his body blinked, and he continued, - Well, I'm back. What are we talking about? Wow, how did you get there for a long time, - he snapped his finger, and now the ship was hovering over that planet, and creatures had accumulated around it, pointing weapons at them.

Fulcrum came out, raised his hand, flew up and all the weapons disappeared, and the creatures froze.

- This spider is doing a good deed, no need to offend him. Let him explore the worlds. Behind me.

Those two did not know what to say, and only silently, knowing that that power was limitless, they followed him. Johnny's thought crept up that he could return to the next world, and he would meet his son there, only when he saw the look of God, swallowed his saliva and did not beg.

We don’t know why God descended to them and why he didn’t go himself, since the force is so powerful, but he only helped them save time, and transferred them to a new planet, where war and devastation always reigned, and where children were killed. Everyone, to be exact. Not a single animal was there, and the aliens ate space itself, tearing layers right out of the void, and that void was filled with space, forming a new void. Dark matter filled their stomachs, and from that they became even more ferocious. And, having reached with Fulcrum near a tiny building, right into a large one, he opened a five-kilometer door with a glance, and stood in front of the main one.

“What are you doing, Galactus, organizing wars, frightening living creatures and destroying worlds?”

We don’t know what happened next, we packed up and left, wishing everyone good night, so that they would resolve this stupid situation, boarded the ship and flew away. Only those creatures looked at us and bared their teeth, then they had nothing to do without permission, they looked at us with their eyes, and nothing more. We started the engine and that’s what we were, a hippopotamus flew after us, he frolicked on the side of us for a long time, tumbled, released a fountain of marmalade, but he soon flew away to another planet, when he was tired, whether to friends, I can’t say this either, but he was happy at that moment, that's without any doubt! Much has already been told about the spider, and much is clear to us that Aragil is the same spider who can do everything in the world, if only he were alive. Let's just say that even Hercules, watching us from the clouds, wondered how it was, but he himself was not, all the time in one place. Tears cried out I packed my suitcase and returned to my wife, saying that I didn’t drink wine, but I brought money. That Hercules was a liar, he asked his father for money to conjure, and when he did not give it, Dumbledore conjured good for him. Such are the miracles.

You know, there are many millions of miracles in the world multiplied by infinitely the same and one finite, but no one has ever talked about this place. They lived there, but what is there, some kind of empty creatures, vacuum. There were a thousand of them, but they did not see each other, they considered themselves lonely. And somehow, a meteorite hit the ground, splashed out some steam from the core, colored the world, and all these creatures began to see each other and even hear. There was no one happier than them. But a dragon flew to their world, spewed fire and burned them, and only one remained, he jumped out of the planet and rushed towards the neighboring stars, turning into a vacuum. The dragon swallowed the scorched ones, sat on the mountain, and fell asleep. And the one who survived, he cried with gold and silver pollen, and still, peering into the sky, you can see the Milky Way, and the same clusters of billions of stars and universes. You won't find anything else in outer space. It’s only worth thinking to people on earth that a macaque is jumping on the planets, holding a scepter, the same moment, a comic astronaut jumps from Jupiter to Saturn, naturally a monkey inside, and this scepter makes it vibrate at a different frequency, so that people don’t they fired a nuclear warhead at it, we know them, but what’s there, the monkey ran away from the earth, crushing its enclosure, took off on an Elon Musk rocket, and then climbed onto a car that was spit out towards Mars, and was glad that it became free , floating freestyle through space.

Whether 2500 or 900 was in the yard, a person came home, pulled a cord out of his chest and put himself on charge, pumped another story cord into his brain, and closing his eyes, saw films, and really ended up there, playing the main actor . Who knows if it hurts to receive those memories, but the person did not experience disgust. There were small boxes the size of a match, where, when they came home, people pumped themselves up. The body was pulled into that box and disappeared, in the lobby the hero chose armor, books, films, weapons, and the world he wanted to enter by switching slides from side to side with his finger.

In one lonely house, in one lonely country, in a world of pain and disappointment, a world of magic and songs, a guy sat and listened to music, and his toys danced to beats, twirled their backs, sipped their guns up, and walked from side to side on the table, then slowly, making a low flow, and breakdancing went up his arm, and stretched out the leg dolls, doing a split, grabbing his ear. The guy got up and they danced together. The dolls jumped off their shoulders and twirled under his feet, dancing, in short shorts, pajamas, long boots and a plaid shirt. And dancing, they went out of the house to the street, where all the toys of the world gathered around, and stretched out in the dance and people, cats, dogs, lions and birds, all danced. Only one sat on a bench and could not dance, drank kerosene, and cried, then slid off the bench, and dived into a hole, and went out with a guitar. Since I can't do it,

In our time, a lot of things happened and we didn’t notice a lot, but how can you get up, stretch, sit on your back, and you don’t have the strength, but you want something like that, but what is it. Pharaohs sit underground and play cards and create mutants, cats sit on the laps of their kings and feel like kings. They have been friends with gladiators for a long time, building cages where they let lions out of marshmallows, and people fight with them, and how they bite on the paw, bite off, tear and eat. The lion will get angry, an alien the size of a fingernail will come out of it, take a forty-meter club out of his pocket and beat the gladiator. That guy will cry, fall down and ask for forgiveness, but it's too late, the money has been paid for the show.

The brown bear ran across Antarctica, ran and glowed, and jumped down under the ice, and ran under the ice, stretched out into colorful stripes, turned into a rabbit, rushed forward, became a snake, crawled, and again formed into a bear, emerged from under the ice, and with one big jump he climbed a steep iceberg, stood on his hind legs and divided into five stars. Five points flew away on the ground, made a circle, collected a little bit of everything, joined back, and turning into a seal, slid down the hill down into the water, where the whales swam, releasing happiness, the smell of happiness and nobility of spirit into the air, and the seal sat on her back and became a bear, fell asleep and absorbed into the skin of a whale, becoming his protection. Now the whale could fly both under the ground, and under water, and above the ground, as soon as it could. That bear figured out, figured out and recreated all the abilities of all the animals of the earth.

And why are we all talking about some boring things, then about some bears and seals, which we really are not interested in, let's best fly on a biscuit shortcake to the moon. The moon is on the other side of the mirror world, and here, tiny lizard business economists live. They run as fast as a bullet, and therefore they think very quickly. No one could compare with them in thought, they only thought all the time about something else and not on the topic, and in their thoughts they could go home, and even far in their thoughts. Sometimes, they think, reflect on the structure of the core of the moon, and they curl up into a ball and penetrate into their mind, you see, only one brain levitates above the earth. What and whom did the lizards ask advice in their minds, but they didn’t get out as fast as they would like, that by that time, palm trees, beans were growing on the moon, interstellar flies were forming, which, incidentally, have not been here for billions of years. Whether from what they thought, or from how long they were and their brains began to decompose, flies had existed on the moon for two thousand years, and, having once emerged from a trance, the lizards feasted for more than a hundred years, not denying themselves food . There were also perverts, as we already said, those lizards were reasonable, and they got married, and they married flies, and when they quarreled, they ate their other halves in a rage. Therefore, the union of flies was strong, and none of them argued with the lizards, but what was there, it was worth somehow buzzing at the ear when they slept under the sun and warmed themselves, immediately hid in cracks in the sand, and sometimes they even preferred fly out of the moon and die of cold, and die a brave death somewhere on another planet. Only one thing they could not tolerate flies in their husbands and wives was that how they treated them as equals, although what is it, the flies themselves, by the way, didn’t cook salads, didn’t cook soups, and in general, they ate only cooked food, vacuumed the crumbs from the surface with their mouths and greedily hid it behind their cheeks. Well, let's leave these poor fellows alone, that we are spoiling their idyll with a story, they are already adult flies and lizards, it would be time to grow up already, let them live, am I talking wrong? Of course right, I always say the right thing. Am I wrong? Of course right, I always say the right thing. Am I wrong? Of course right, I always say the right thing.

Would you believe it if I say that once Artyom Balabanov, a resident of Astrakhan, disappeared from his house number five on the street of St. Moses? But you believe me! Of course, a person cannot take and simply disappear without a trace, something was wrong here, a person cannot dissolve at will, leave his favorite toys, bed, favorite TV, and what’s there, his radio-controlled rocket, on which he has been all his childhood furrowed the streets of his yard. But what actually happened? Who will understand it, but it was like this:

Thirty-two-year-old Artyom sat in his house, watched Pun, laughed, put the kettle on to boil, poured tea, and disappeared, right after taking a sip. Some magical dimensions opened at that moment, and Artyom was sucked into the cup, into dimension forty-three. When the parents came to him, they did not know that our friend had flown away. They saw that it was dirty at home, they took and washed all the dishes, even a cup, where there was a portal at the bottom, and the portal dissolved, and washed off into the sewer pipe and crawled along the walls of the pipes into a large lake. Or maybe it didn’t crawl, but disappeared completely, like candy, having dissolved from the dishwasher. But the mother remembers that, putting it all on the sink, when she threw the spoon, it disappeared, and the water itself seemed to wash off, but the mother then thought that she had imagined it, washed it again, hung it on a hook, and went out. So she does not know what happened to their son. And Artyom, meanwhile, fell near Leonard da Vinci, and became his friend, at first, of course, how could it be otherwise, he did not understand that foreigner, but he immediately got used to it, despite his age, already solid for learning languages, and learned it. There were no others, let alone Russians. They flew on airplanes, jumped off a cliff, dived under water in spacesuits, built pistols, and somehow invented a robot, and there was no limit to Artyom’s surprise, that’s how it turns out that people weren’t so stupid then. Artyom could no longer return and died there, before Da Vinci himself, when he jumped from an unfinished parachute. Although he could have died before when the tank was built, and they wanted to test it under water, he refused, saying that it would be difficult to get out of the capsule that way. Artyom didn't know that it was supposed to be like that. And dying, death flew to him, took it and threw it back out of that cup. Artyom sprawled across the kitchen set, got up, brushed himself off, looked out the window, and there was already the end of everything, and the world collapsed due to the fact that the dimension was crushed by reality. Hitler was alive, and he and Stalin were drinking tea. He looks, and there are general’s stripes on his shoulder, and Artyom realized that he had betrayed his homeland, and jumped off the roof, but only the flying officers on the anti-gravity starship-snowboard picked him up, saluted and lowered him near the entrance.

- Be careful, sir.

Artyom swallowed his saliva, took a cigarette out of his breast pocket and lit it. For the first time, and sat on a bench, and the city was on fire. Blazed, but the technological age has come. Whether it was good or not, Balabanov did not know, and wanted to see his mother. And Mother, wow, mother was Hitler's wife. Learning about this, Artyom burst into tears, like a real boy, got on a spaceship and flew to a place where he could think about what he should do, whether to kill his father or not. And I thought, it would be better for the whole world to die than for all of humanity to suffer. Only he had no powers other than his own head. Artyom came home after three days of reflection, found that cup, and called back the time, called and cried, promised not to be estranged again. And death came, came and hit him in the face, and the guy woke up. It turned out that he fell asleep on his table, whether he was tired or from something, and the tea has cooled down for a long time already, and in the room a rocket and an old TV are waiting for him. The first thing the guy called his mother and agreed to meet, and immediately hugged on arrival. It is quiet and fresh outside the window, the sun is shining, children are walking, and Jews, all Jews are in place. His friend Petya is out, running with the prefix dandy to him, bought somewhere at a flea market, their childhood prefix.

It’s okay to be happy, let him rejoice, let’s close the curtain, our Artyomka is embarrassed, he still has so many good things to say to his relatives and friends, he needs to retire, you know for yourself, this is a very shy thing, to confess your love. Shh...let's go, hush, hush. So let's fly over to me.

There are wallpapers in my room, yes, yes, it’s amazing, yes, it’s not surprising, everyone has wallpapers, so I’m sitting here and showing off, but what? Do you have a wallpaper through which you can enter the digital world and become a Formula One player, or ride a dinosaur? It is unlikely that you even know what it really is. Look, I jumped on the marmalade and got stuck in it, fell under it, and came out in a rainbow, and here unicorns are rolling children, hares are dancing in a round dance, and snakes are flying across the sky, and raccoons are holding them by a rope. Mario is running next to them, building a path for Sonic, right there as he runs. See how he manages to stir the cement and lay the paving stones at the same time. Hell knows! But what is there is a tape recorder that you listen to, and do not believe me, you turn out to be a performer of the song that sounds from there. So, you stand, listen, and you sing it. And there are such tape recorders from which the heads of your favorite performers emerge, and they, holding the microphone, fly out of it and sing, at the same time they dance, call out, yell your name. And you are so shy, but you go. They will only ask what you want, you will say, a million for the first time, you will joke, and right there in front of you is a million, but they don’t understand jokes, these are the real Genies! Then you play enough in that world, your head will buzz, of course, it’s very good to have fun, but it’s very difficult for you, you know, to get used to the noise at all, and therefore I fly out of the wallpaper like a bullet, and here there is such peace, silence, which, by the way, I love it more than the fun itself, so I would sit and listen to the beating of the heart. Well, that can be arranged. at the same time they dance, call, yell your name. And you are so shy, but you go. They will only ask what you want, you will say, a million for the first time, you will joke, and right there in front of you is a million, but they don’t understand jokes, these are the real Genies! Then you play enough in that world, your head will buzz, of course, it’s very good to have fun, but it’s very difficult for you, you know, to get used to the noise at all, and therefore I fly out of the wallpaper like a bullet, and here there is such peace, silence, which, by the way, I love it more than the fun itself, so I would sit and listen to the beating of the heart. Well, that can be arranged. at the same time they dance, call, yell your name. And you are so shy, but you go. They will only ask what you want, you will say, a million for the first time, you will joke, and right there in front of you is a million, but they don’t understand jokes, these are the real Genies! Then you play enough in that world, your head will buzz, of course, it’s very good to have fun, but it’s very difficult for you, you know, to get used to the noise at all, and therefore I fly out of the wallpaper like a bullet, and here there is such peace, silence, which, by the way, I love it more than the fun itself, so I would sit and listen to the beating of the heart. Well, that can be arranged. Then you play enough in that world, your head will buzz, of course, it’s very good to have fun, but it’s very difficult for you, you know, to get used to the noise at all, and therefore I fly out of the wallpaper like a bullet, and here there is such peace, silence, which, by the way, I love it more than the fun itself, so I would sit and listen to the beating of the heart. Well, that can be arranged. Then you play enough in that world, your head will buzz, of course, it’s very good to have fun, but it’s very difficult for you, you know, to get used to the noise at all, and therefore I fly out of the wallpaper like a bullet, and here there is such peace, silence, which, by the way, I love it more than the fun itself, so I would sit and listen to the beating of the heart. Well, that can be arranged.

Let's fly to the place where the doctors extract the heart and show what it's like to see the heart and feel that you are fragile. Only a rib and thin skin protect us. Here, having flown, we see how the doctor takes out the heart from the human body and puts it on the dishes, it is still beating, but don’t worry, it’s impossible to die here, such a place is the planet of Healers. Capsules of immortality are created here. Divide me into a million small pieces, and I’ll live, it’s worth shifting with a scoop into another dish, put it in a microwave oven, bake me, and I will immediately become a lump, whole, and be born a man. I'll scratch my forehead, I'll take my heart as a keepsake... wait, what does a heart mean as a keepsake? And so, this is the thing, I ordered an additional service, to grow me a new heart, healthy and strong, otherwise with this, the doctors told me, not a short day, and in ten years I will seize an attack and die, but with a new one, at least forty years I will walk without problems. That's how it is here. They test our body in a simulation of time, that is, our organs begin to age, and see how long we last. This is the technology of the future! And so, I grew a young one for myself, I’ll take the old one with me, maybe to the ladies’ museum, well, she’s here, around the corner. Meanwhile, on that planet, after all, people are not only treated, but there are departments where people are killed because they are guilty, and the heart is taken away for other patients, old ones, so as not to grow them again, this is not profitable - but for the old, for example a ninety-year-old, there is no need for a “forty-year-old” heart, even ten is enough for him. Nevertheless, by that time in most cases they lose their memory, and they think that they are already young. It would be humane to give them ten years, and not tempt them with an unfortunate fate. What is it like to wake up every day and not feel that you live at all, no, you live for real, only every day in a new way, as if losing all yesterday's memory. Is this life? One old man somehow got ready and left the clinic, just got out, jumped down the stairs, collapsed and died. I thought I was young, but that's what happens.

Oh, come on, let them do what they want, and we are already rushing to the magical mountain. So what is a mountain? Wow! Eragon the dragon lives there. And why do we have so many dragons here, but I wanted to see more dragons, aren't they beautiful? So, having risen to the top, we see him, Eragon, or it is she. Who will sort them out. I went up to him and said that I would tame him, like the one without a tooth from a cartoon, and he smiled and said that today, according to the schedule, he had a well-deserved day off, he still had to cook mashed potatoes, goulash, and cook compote. And I felt sad, waved my hand at him, and took out his big spoon, and said that, by the way, I also want to eat!

Глава 4

Lonely in the sky, the tail of a peacock flew, circling above the whirlpool of blankets. The Indians danced over the abyss, shouted, and danced near the Christmas tree, picking plasticine out of the tractor wheels. Somewhere here grew trees with pomegranates instead of needles, snow flowed in streams, it tasted like real kissel, cannibal trees, art history teachers' socks. Somewhere above the clouds, a cat roams and licks them like milk, pulls out pieces, disturbing the chambers of the swallows, reading the barcodes of babies that will fall into the eggs of live swallows. And only I, damn that day, when I opened the door to my father's room, sat and repaired his toy plane. He told me to make a plane out of this water, threw a bucket of milk at me, said to get powdered milk and water, built an airplane from the second, and made a snowman from the first, because he has no money, and you can fly on your own for free . He beat me with a whip and did not pay money, saying that the sons should work for just a thank you, or just for the fact that they were not drowned in a basin after giving birth. And in general, children are slaves, and, if you dig deep, a part of him that should satisfy and help himself. Wow, I thought then, but I didn’t come up with excuses, therefore, I fish out water from a canister of milk, and build the wettest plane in the universe, which is not afraid of rain, and in general, rain is only fuel, and it flies because of the sun, from -for evaporation, because the sun, by the way, pulls all the water into the clouds. The sun is our friend. My friend: Wow, I thought then, but I didn’t come up with excuses, therefore, I fish out water from a canister of milk, and build the wettest plane in the universe, which is not afraid of rain, and in general, rain is only fuel, and it flies because of the sun, from -for evaporation, because the sun, by the way, pulls all the water into the clouds. The sun is our friend. My friend: Wow, I thought then, but I didn’t come up with excuses, therefore, I fish out water from a canister of milk, and build the wettest plane in the universe, which is not afraid of rain, and in general, rain is only fuel, and it flies because of the sun, from -for evaporation, because the sun, by the way, pulls all the water into the clouds. The sun is our friend. My friend:

- Warriors of Fire! I yelled, unable to contain my anger. - Let's get started! Who else wants to accomplish this feat? Who else wants to help build a plane?

Because of the Christmas tree in my room there was a crash, it seems that I awakened the forest dwellers. Rimbaud's opponents silently turned to me, but it was too late - three monsters were coming out from under the Christmas tree. Clubbing warriors, fire demons, Satan, and two psychopaths - one with a mask.

I took a timid step forward, and one of them spat acid at me, causing barley to grow on my eye. I managed to dodge by throwing a log at the vampire, which was treacherously heavy, but dug mercilessly into the back. Several strong blows to the chest shattered the larynx, and blood poured from the wound and tinsel fell down.

“Who do you think you are, little man?” Satan asked. He was wearing a leather suit and leather gloves.

"I'm not a human, I'm a vampire," I retorted.

It's hard to offend a demon.

The demon growled and lunged at me. I took the mace in my hand, expecting a blow from him. And he brought it over my head, when suddenly the Lord of Light quickly stood between us. A huge hand with a formidable red fireball rose high down - and everything disappeared - the vampire, Satan, demons - everything. Only the fireplace crackled peacefully, burning to the ground. The water swirled and flew up. The ceiling was black.

— Is it that simple? I was surprised.

More matches flew into the fireplace, and it caught fire even more.

Then the Lord of Light made a round table from the flames of the fireplace, put on it something from my persimmon that was kept in my nostril, and pushing me away, he said:

- We know who you are. For a week, the portal has been closed to you. But today it will be open because the Lord of Darkness invited me to the party. I hope you let him hug his mother. And he will allow you to burn in the fireplace, and instead of you he will build an airplane and make a snowman. I nodded, but the Lord did not know that we ate mother for Easter.

The dead body fell to the floor. The lord took my head off.

“No-o-o,” howled the devil next to the fireplace. The head rolled under the sofa and disappeared.

It didn't take long to find my missing head.

Raising my head, I saw a little boy sitting on the carpet. I repented and crushed him.

The absence of eyes did not prevent him from seeing better than me. The boy saw his death, burst out laughing, packed his suitcase and ran away.

Yes, what is there, it's all nonsense, like this whole story, but let's get into more serious reading. So…

In the spring of forty-three, on the eve of the war against Germany, when I was sitting in a trench and watching cartoons, they called me on my mobile phone from London and said that an elderly lady had settled in my house, next door, who every evening comes to my door and prays. My sixty-year-old daughter came out the door and listened to what she whispered:

“May you die, damned sinner,” the old woman whispered, then spitting seeds, drawing a pictogram and calling on Satan to take my soul out of turn. She poured blood over mice, drew patterns with the bottoms of pigs.

“You can, daughter of God,” said the daughter, in order to calm the woman, and she, obeying my order, took a chair and hit her on the ridge, the side where the most nails stuck out, then kicked her in the face with her heel, drove her into the wall with her head with a nail, pounding on the footsteps, and hung all the walls with guts.

Who could know about the supernatural nature of this creature and magical ability. From under the floor came out, or rather flew out, like a formula one car, the soul of an old woman, and knitted and darned her body all night, and in the morning again went out on the path of prayer and called out to Satan. And, once again, when a call came from apartment number seven on Sherlock Holmes Street nine three quarters to the seventh power of three minus nine, a hand grabbed me by the ears through the telephone receiver and dragged me to London. As soon as I got off my phone, I saw a picture. A naked, wrinkled, walrus-like old woman danced near the chunga-changa fire, and next to her sat a man with horns, Satan, nothing else. Named Hellboy. Red-red, as if he had just hatched from the ass of some cow or goat, or, he liked to bathe in tomato sauce. Then, brushing me off your finger,

- So it's you?

- Who am I?

“The bastard with which this grandmother was buzzing all over my ears.

I looked at the dead old woman, and swallowed my saliva; Mother. She died two years before my birth, where did she come from? Then the soul flew out of the floor and began to knit the body, sew together the scraps. Finished with her body, the old lady pulled the Colt Magnum from her stockings and pulled the trigger; As soon as the smoke cleared, Satan squeezed a bullet in his teeth, and, standing up, again smeared the old woman on the ground. It can't be any other way, but the old ladies like to argue until the opponent gives up, and therefore, she always got back up until she finally developed immunity against blows and became invulnerable.

- Cursed! she screamed, spitting out dirty socks, and gnawed bones, crumbs and banana peel. Together with Satan, they rolled on the floor and bit each other's ears, shoulders and arms, then got up, dusted themselves off and got married in front of the TV, through the Spas channel to the sound of bells and dying babies.

Now, my dad Hellboy, every evening comes to my apartment and arranges a disco for prostitutes, makes love to them, kills, fries, releases them through a meat grinder, then the old woman sews them together, and they go hand in hand back to Hell. Satan does not pay his prostitutes at all, but takes installments in my name, after which, maybe a month or two passes, collectors come to me and bulge their eyes through their feet, between their fingers, pull their tongue out through their mouths, knit a bow and celebrate something, and they leave, taking a promise from me that someday ... I still did not understand what kind of promise they took then, but just in case, I began to keep my tongue in a safe. When they asked me why I was silent, I told everyone that I had put away the language for safekeeping, and, in order to distract them from the lack of language, I told them new tales and legends.

Where my daughter disappeared all this time, I have no idea, but one fine day, when there were no prostitutes, and it was not necessary to clean the blood from the carpet with a brush and needles, she came home drunk and said that she was already an adult girl and had the right decide what to do and when.

“I’m already sixty-one years old, by the way!” she yelled. So I did not argue with her, I gave her a brush and a needle, and said that she herself could clean the carpet. My daughter cleaned it, because she herself said that she was independent. But, then, having worked, probably in a tiny head, the left acorn hit the right acorn, forming a brain, she looked askance at me all the time, came out from around the corners, from under the carpet, from under the flower pot, from the socks in the bathroom , from a crack in the floor, from under a notebook, and squinted her eyes, trying to shame me. I immediately hit her on the top of the head with a hammer, and she lay for an hour, bulging her eyes and sticking out her tongue on the floor, on her back. Until she regained consciousness, the rats ate her eyes and tongue, and then, having learned that she was alive, they returned her tongue and eyes. She, if you watch her for a long, long time, squeaks like a mouse, eats crumbs, and crawls between the wall and the wallpaper, and, having heard a noise, hiding behind the pipes in the toilet. And if you don’t feed her on time, she even walks like a man, on tiptoe, first on the floor, like in a circus, then along the wall, and then she starts to crawl, at first like this: one paw pulls the other, but then she has paws, and torso, and head, she tries to get up, and when she succeeds, she puts her paw on her head, and for a minute looks in front of her, at her roommate, and then again falls to the floor and lies, lies, and breathes hard, and slowly dying, then I kill her with a hammer on the head and throw it away so that she does not suffer. So she lies until she is bought for someone to eat. - but then her paws appear, and the body, and the head, she tries to get up, and when she succeeds, she puts her paw on her head, and for a minute looks in front of her, at her roommate, and then again falls to the floor and lies, lies, and breathes heavily, and slowly dies, then I kill her on the head with a hammer and throw it away so that she does not suffer. So she lies until she is bought for someone to eat. - but then her paws appear, and the body, and the head, she tries to get up, and when she succeeds, she puts her paw on her head, and for a minute looks in front of her, at her roommate, and then again falls to the floor and lies, lies, and breathes heavily, and slowly dies, then I kill her on the head with a hammer and throw it away so that she does not suffer. So she lies until she is bought for someone to eat.

“Tell me, my joy,” my wife will ask me in a month, what do you do?

I will answer: - I killed her. - Whom?! - Rat. The wife won't believe it, and we'll discuss that later. Or never. I do not remember. I then killed the Rat again, she squeaked for a long time, ran along the ceiling and scratched my face; but already with a neighbor, one after another, every day, I'm a drug addict, I have to constantly kill.

One coyote threw a carpet out of the house and his paws froze. But he went to his friend, a piece of chalk, and they went to bed. And then the last coyote came, took cover behind the chalk back and became warm again. The coyotes embraced and said to each other: “From now on, we will sleep together, because it is cold for us to sleep on different carpets. One of the coyotes, the most important, lived on the ocean. He labored to wash the bones of sharks. He said that he never eats fish or drinks water. Therefore, he looked solid and powerful. But the sharks were not afraid of him. He looked like a mosquito that sits and scratches its ass with its nose. And the sharks frowned in disgust when he approached them, but did not touch him. But then a comet flew across the sky. The comet was like an ember, and it fell into the ocean and set fire to all the corals. Comets are very useful. These are the substances that will help us defeat the Black Hole. I couldn't sleep because I thought about what useful substances would help me in the fight against the Black Hole. I thought it was me who is very useful on my own, so my sunny orange juice will help me. I poured it into my mouth and began to suck, so that hydrochloric acid immediately formed. She hit me in the brain, and I fell asleep. Waking up in the morning, I ran to the ocean, and threw the juice into the air, it swirled and exploded. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and went home. Now, looking at the black hole, I saw an orange one. So we defeated the black hole, and the next day we were sucked into the orange one. Waking up in the morning, I ran to the ocean, and threw the juice into the air, it swirled and exploded. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and went home. Now, looking at the black hole, I saw an orange one. So we defeated the black hole, and the next day we were sucked into the orange one. Waking up in the morning, I ran to the ocean, and threw the juice into the air, it swirled and exploded. I wiped the sweat off my forehead and went home. Now, looking at the black hole, I saw an orange one. So we defeated the black hole, and the next day we were sucked into the orange one.

The Brooklyn Bridge hung from the clouds and collected many thousands of tiny cities where fairy-tale characters lived, from Thumbelina to hobbits and the Mad Hatter. Santa Claus flew from house to house and ate cookies left by children, hobbits stole rings from newlyweds to destroy them on top of the volcano, considering them the ring of Sauron's omnipotence, and Thumbelina went to bed in a matchbox and saw dirty dreams with several boys with fingers. The Mad Hatter told stories and laughed wildly as he butchered the old woman from the Golden Fish fairy tale and licked his knife while celebrating a nightly dinner with Shrek and his wife. In less than five minutes, only seven, Turuk Makto descended from the clouds on a dragon and called the inhabitants of the magic bridge to fly after him. All flew, fell on the rocks and the sea of acid and shattered into pieces. No one else has flown from the bridge since that day. Makto was a damn smart creature, flying himself on a dragon, he convinced everyone that they could fly without him. Probably, this is how faith works, people believe in something that does not really exist, and this gives them hope that there is still magic, and something in their life can change, if you only want to once. Only life doesn’t work like that, it doesn’t want you to become better, it’s more profitable for it, so that you become worse and take everything from it not for nothing, but for some deeds and feats. The feat to go outside and run in the rain, do a thousand sit-ups or write a book, all this is given only by labor, by the desire of oneself, but then, as it happens, people think that it was God who gave them these powers, but in fact no one gave them anything. , and you yourself wanted it, because in the depths of your soul you felt that there is nothing more stupid in the world,

Meanwhile, somewhere far away from you, people run along the edge and feel just fine. They go home, drink coffee and become younger, and when the old people put their hands to the coffee and drink, they also become younger and return to childhood; just for a day, but this is enough to drink a couple of thousand more cups of coffee and become fast, beautiful and sincere. Can you imagine how many times you can get experience from life constantly becoming young for centuries? How much pain and happiness people experience and become wise.

Toothpicks live somewhere on the other side, they jump into the ocean and catch fish, then they pull them out onto land and feed the hungry children they have taken on. It happens in this part of the world, instead of raising or killing the little ones, people send them to the island of toothpicks, hoping that the toothpicks will kill them instead, but in reality everything is not so rosy; toothpicks do not kill children, they educate them and give wisdom, although in fact they cannot speak, there is always silence there, that is, it stood until the children began to appear one after another. Gnawing the back of the fish, the children rejoice, they hug the toothpicks and call those “mom” and “dad” only in their own language, which they invented themselves, because they have never heard human speeches. When they reached the age of fourteen, the children left the island, told how they survived, what they ate and how happy they were. And everyone in the world wanted to get there, only toothpicks killed callous and evil people, avenging their children, whom they threw away like useless garbage. They don't trust adults. And they do it right; adult people are evil and always lie for their own benefit. The children cry as they leave, but they have no other choice. It is the law of the tribe that before they become adults (getting big they will be killed), toothpicks do not kill them and do not throw them into the ocean. So they are saved and given a new life. The kids don't come back here anymore. Perhaps this is how these kids understand the value of children and bring them up according to the laws of toothpicks, loving and not denying them comfort and warmth. So most of all thrown out children. which they threw away like rubbish. They don't trust adults. And they do it right; adult people are evil and always lie for their own benefit. The children cry as they leave, but they have no other choice. It is the law of the tribe that before they become adults (getting big they will be killed), toothpicks do not kill them and do not throw them into the ocean. So they are saved and given a new life. The kids don't come back here anymore. Perhaps this is how these kids understand the value of children and bring them up according to the laws of toothpicks, loving and not denying them comfort and warmth. So most of all thrown out children. which they threw away like rubbish. They don't trust adults. And they do it right; adult people are evil and always lie for their own benefit. The children cry as they leave, but they have no other choice. It is the law of the tribe that before they become adults (getting big they will be killed), toothpicks do not kill them and do not throw them into the ocean. So they are saved and given a new life. The kids don't come back here anymore. Perhaps this is how these kids understand the value of children and bring them up according to the laws of toothpicks, loving and not denying them comfort and warmth. So most of all thrown out children. the toothpicks didn't kill them or throw them into the ocean. So they are saved and given a new life. The kids don't come back here anymore. Perhaps this is how these kids understand the value of children and bring them up according to the laws of toothpicks, loving and not denying them comfort and warmth. So most of all thrown out children. the toothpicks didn't kill them or throw them into the ocean. So they are saved and given a new life. The kids don't come back here anymore. Perhaps this is how these kids understand the value of children and bring them up according to the laws of toothpicks, loving and not denying them comfort and warmth. So most of all thrown out children.

Maybe once you thought that everything in the world is perfect, but you would like to know a more ideal world. Such is the world, and there are doors, entering which, or rather touching their handles, people find themselves in the world that they themselves imagined, in the country and planet that they themselves created. Holding a hand up to the handle of the door, the handle sucks people in, twisting them into a thin strip and throwing them into the world they have chosen; Italy, Budapest, the top of the Sphinx, the planet of chocolates, the star constellation of jelly and pasties, who knows. Everyone has their own dream. But in fact, people just leave their body lying in the kitchen, and their mind rushes into a computer simulation, where any dream is a reality.

So you sit on a chair, and suddenly you feel uneasy, sounds come from the next room, so familiar or so familiar; leaving, running out into the hall, you see how they show the film that you dreamed about, the products that you dreamed about. This is because in the future no one will be alone and they will always be listened to through everything they have at home. During the construction of houses, they will immediately introduce microphones into the walls in order to eavesdrop on you and advertise their products to you, control equipment remotely, even if it is not included in the network; small nano robots will power your appliances by coming out of the wall just to advertise their product to you. This is how you lie on your bed, sleep, and at night there is a loud roar, and this is your technique that advertises what you saw in a dream or spoke without waking up. And wanting something to eat, a delivery courier flies in through your door, leaves what you would like to eat, or what your body desired, and withdraw money from the account that you open already at birth, introducing your DNA particles into bio-credit banks. When you work or buy something, you are given cash, and with this cash you will buy something. Until you reach the age of sixteen, the state will allocate money to your account, which you have the right to spend, and you will not have a pension, for this you should open your own business or work for other people of the same kind. They will pay you with their caches that they have, and so on in a circle. Someone wants to share their cache, and someone instead wants to steal them, but that's just never possible without the desire of the DNA carrier itself. You will eat and eat, do nothing, and one day your house will be taken away, because your cash will go into the red, and, only once they will be able to give you a loan so that you do not live on the street, the period at which you must pay all the minuses you have, and then the state will take away everything you have. It will even take away your bio-credit so that you cannot buy anything, because there is no cash in this world, and people pay with themselves; what I want to say with this is that people in that world will be law-abiding so as not to die or be left alone, therefore even the slightest help to those who are left without a loan will entail punishment, a fine in the form of debiting funds, and without them, alas, live in the future is impossible, and if the DNA bank is taken away altogether, then it will be impossible to make money on anything. It remains to be homeless. (We are talking about those who have lost their bank account. Ordinary ones can be helped, free of charge). Only microphones and cameras mounted on the walls will catch you and lock you in nurseries, to show you on TV, intimidating the population, so that in no case will they help, otherwise they will be like them, not needed and prisoners who are given water once a day, and food from the leftovers after the rich; bones, peel, lumps, fat, seed husks. All that's left. Even the wool of dead animals will not be given to them, because wool is the most important thing for promoting on TV advertising for the sale of fur coats and boots. Intestines for creating food for the poor, bones for interior solutions, paw pads for cooking aspic (jelly). You are talking with your friend on the street about having a car, they bring a car to you, and you suddenly become happy for a moment ... and then completely subside to the grass, only the battle of ocean waves in your head; “cash is leaving”, it’s still lucky for you that some of the money is returned to your account in the form of cash, that's why it's called that; “life in debt”, “cash for your cash”.

And people have no other choice, they are seized by greed and a rich life that they see on TV when they show those ill-fated advertising banners, people who drink cocktails and fly in a helicopter - they think they can also, and burn everything available. This is what advertising is aimed at, so that people spend their "cash" faster. And I don't want to work, for the life of me. People get used to the fact that the state provides them, and people forget how to do anything at all, they cannot even wash themselves without someone else's help; people are told if you have the opportunity to help others, share and give work, give it - they hire those who know how to work, those who will wash their face, arms, legs and body, who will lift a spoon for them and put it in their mouths , and those will pay with "cache". They will hire someone who will lift the toilet seat for them, wipe their asses, flush for them, and sweep the floor after them. Even the TV, you see, must be turned on manually, kneeling down and switching programs by pressing up and down buttons. Even this kind of work is in demand. One has only to say, channel five, and the person switches to the fifth channel. So what kind of life is this? Everything seems to be perfect, but it's not. People run around the streets carrying people behind their backs. In a word, people earn as they can, and where they can. Of course, not everyone needs a servant in the house, and not everyone can afford it. But what happens when there is no longer enough money, but everything, on the contrary, the people who served, are now the owners of those who were served. So they support each other's "cache", and this is not prohibited at all. The most difficult thing is not to buy and not be led by advertising. Sweet words. Let's take the same poor; they brew one brew per commune, and one spoonful of coffee is shared among the entire community, diluted with water, and drunk for everyone - saving "kesha" - a sect. Many people end up in this commune because they have no other choice. And things wear out one after another, share. It happens that they eat one plate of noodles on a spoon every five hours, so as not to go broke. They sell things for half a penny to others who are also not averse to buying something cheaper, and save money on ruining their "cache" and not become like all these sectarians.

Man is a beautiful being until proven otherwise. For example, in one small village people are bred through flowers in a pot. They plant the seeds of a lily, a bell, a cactus, and for some time the flowers grow, and in the buds a child is sleeping curled up in a ball, the flower falls slowly to the ground, opens and brings a living baby to the light, he screams, squeaks, then they take him with a scoop and they put it in a basket with warm clothes, pour water on top so that it does not dry out and does not need to drink and does not suffer from dehydration. Children cannot say what they want. Especially floral ones.

Imagine a world where we live in a world where each object has its own gravity and attraction, that each object has its own core. Thus, we, humans, can walk straight up a ten-story building vertically, climb skyscrapers, walk from the opposite side of the sea (water tension), go around clouds up and down from end to beginning, carry animals on their backs without anything - they stand on their feet right with us, instead of a backpack on his back, he can even sleep curled up. You can also carry entire stores on your back without buying any equipment for this, for example, an ant farm, so that other people look and be touched by your farm. And there are things that actually make things easier, such as balls that cows will graze on, and which can be carried on a string from one place to another. You can even sell them with a balloon, and instead of any trucks, people would simply leave on a bicycle with a balloon in their hands, on which goats, cows and even a whole zoo graze. Of course, it is difficult for you to imagine how so many animals can fit on a small ball, but like this; not only does the weight decrease, but the size of those animals, or even they will vibrate at their own frequency of weight, on contact with each other will fly through each other. That is, standing in one place, there can be a whole planet of animals, but only by one microgram, differing from each other in weight - it is each gram that vibrates on its own dimension, frequency, like radio and wi-fi towers, or gamma rays. It’s very convenient, isn’t it, but, of course, it is. on which goats, cows and even a whole zoo graze. Of course, it is difficult for you to imagine how so many animals can fit on a small ball, but like this; not only does the weight decrease, but the size of those animals, or even they will vibrate at their own frequency of weight, on contact with each other will fly through each other. That is, standing in one place, there can be a whole planet of animals, but only by one microgram, differing from each other in weight - it is each gram that vibrates on its own dimension, frequency, like radio and wi-fi towers, or gamma rays. It’s very convenient, isn’t it, but, of course, it is. on which goats, cows and even a whole zoo graze. Of course, it is difficult for you to imagine how so many animals can fit on a small ball, but like this; not only does the weight decrease, but the size of those animals, or even they will vibrate at their own frequency of weight, on contact with each other will fly through each other. That is, standing in one place, there can be a whole planet of animals, but only by one microgram, differing from each other in weight - it is each gram that vibrates on its own dimension, frequency, like radio and wi-fi towers, or gamma rays. It’s very convenient, isn’t it, but, of course, it is. or even they will vibrate at their own weight frequency, on contact with each other they will fly through each other. That is, standing in one place, there can be a whole planet of animals, but only by one microgram, differing from each other in weight - it is each gram that vibrates on its own dimension, frequency, like radio and wi-fi towers, or gamma rays. It’s very convenient, isn’t it, but, of course, it is. or even they will vibrate at their own weight frequency, on contact with each other they will fly through each other. That is, standing in one place, there can be a whole planet of animals, but only by one microgram, differing from each other in weight - it is each gram that vibrates on its own dimension, frequency, like radio and wi-fi towers, or gamma rays. It’s very convenient, isn’t it, but, of course, it is.

“Oh, if I had wings,” Kyle thought, looking at the snake trains in the sky, “I would fly around the world and I wouldn’t need a house,” Serpentine trains, meanwhile, flew and carried people from one house to another, from city to city, from the earth to the moon, creating a slimy cocoon behind their backs with oxygen as they move. You don’t need to pay anything, these snakes migrate, and the main thing is to know when and how much. You only need a document about your health, so as not to kill any disease of the train snake.

There are so many things in the world, but you can’t count them, so many that a whole big book of a million pages is not enough. The girl runs on the ground, never sleeps, never eats, and if she does eat, only what she gets, if she just stops for a moment, she will wither and die. Only running gives her energy and youth, life; stopping time takes away her youth, she grows old. It even happens that during her run she learned to extract energy not from food, but from the sun and stars, from their slightest glimpse in the sky. I would not want to run all my life just to be young, it was not enough to sacrifice sleep in order to live forever. What kind of life is it to run and run, not to communicate, not to read, not to listen, not to see, spin like a squirrel in a wheel and think that the world consists only of speed. On the one hand, this is true, but on the other hand, not only in the speed of life.

On the walls of the houses, the painters painted a large, three-story dandelion, went home, and that drawing from the wind spins in one direction or the other, depending on the direction of the wind, and it happens that the paint flies through the air, like a real dandelion fluff and sticks to another building while creating completely different pictures. The girl holds the dress so that she does not rise and expose the thong, the dog opened its mouth, catching particles of the wind so as not to overheat. Such pictures, such a world. And it would be cool to watch this from your home, stretch out your hand and feel how the paint digs into your hand and stays there, and after you blow on it, it flies to another part of the city. Imagine how various drawings would fly all over the street and dig into houses, into rooms and kitchens, into corridors, and when unnecessary, you just blow them with a hair dryer or suck them in with a vacuum cleaner and throw them out of the balcony. Someone will definitely be happy.

In the state of Connecticut, laboratories have long been created that no one knows about; for hundreds of years, scientists have been studying the properties of their devices, namely; by means of a sticker on the foot, where the ability, for example, to dance is recorded, people are taught to dance any dance only with a sticker, without memorizing the movements. And once they stick another one on which the history of Egypt is recorded, people know everything about Egypt, including what Tutankhamun ate and how people worshiped cats and the sun god RA. And there are cords through which you can transfer information directly to the brain by connecting the input on the leg via usb, there are also plug-in cassettes under the foot; they make it possible to understand different languages, due to the fact that the cassette contains a dictionary, several books and examples, so that a person can easily communicate with native speakers, in addition, spinal cassettes are inserted behind the neck with needles,

Meanwhile, in the past, far before people learned to write something down for memorization; people bought masks and went to the ball, danced, laughed and dreamed of a good life; to grab someone rich, a farmer or the son of a lord, they wagged their tails in front of kings. And behind the bright side of it all, there were never-ending wars for life - people were caught and their faces cut out to create masks, pulled on wooden, hand-made mock-ups of faces, and people were thrown into cages, deep underground, and they died there from blood loss. or from hunger. The skin of the face was cleaned from both sides, they were given a beautiful and well-groomed appearance, washed with soap and glued with resin on wooden models, decorated with feathers, mouths, noses and red cheeks were painted with paints and resin, then they were sold. People bought, put on and left laughing, but they never thought about how the masks were obtained, and who made them. In the mornings, the sellers smiled and pulled masks, and in the evening, under the cover of night, they caught people, tied them up and cut out their faces, without pity or fear, since there was no law yet, and no police that could catch them and punish them. The girls giggled, flirted, looked at their interlocutors and lovers, but at the same time long dead people looked from their faces, remaining in an eternal, sad smile of sorrow and pain. Once upon a time, these faces were crying, and the skin stretched over the model was now drawing another grimace - a smile. For the sake of profit, people themselves have become a mask. So they called those who sold them - "two-faced jesters." And the truth is, none of the people joked about human lives, like a seller of wooden masks, stretched with the faces of children, girls and old people. For them, human life is just a joke. And the sellers felt their inviolability,

In a dimension where there was absolutely nothing, where a person could not get even by jumping directly onto the planet, only stones lived. But what stones! There couldn't be people there for a simple reason, people who visited the planet by jumping from a ship; on the planet - only biological objects could get through the atmosphere - flying to the surface became stones and hit the sand and remained there forever, so many of those who tried to find and help their astronaut friends, jumping to the planet themselves became stones; it's a little insulting that when people got to the planet, they became inanimate, and the inanimate could not get to the planet. Meteorites and comets bounced back into space, and as soon as a microbe or some kind of cosmic plankton flew onto the planet (you never know what planktons are, there are some), they became grains of sand. That's why the beach is on it.

And there are quite entertaining universes where every planet is an art. On one, only artists live, like Van Gogh, and on others, chemists, like Mendeleev, and on the third, inventors, Da Vinci. It is amazing that when drawing, everything materializes, and when inventing, everything works. All dreams and desires, all that is possible. Would you like to live like this? But what is it like to live so ... boring, doing the same thing, but not being able to want to try another; gets bored, and, therefore, when someone loses their taste and starts to get involved in something else, they are sucked in by a funnel and thrown to another planet - they belong there. Now Van Gogh can compose music or build spaceships, or he can grow cabbages, and even compose books.

In Ireland, cars drive through the streets without people, this is not because there are no people there, but because sneakers, shoes and sneakers live in Ireland, self-developed, smart and alive. And next to them, in another country, live hats that fly planes, and on the third, just a thousand kilometers later, along a road lined with stones, monkey detectives live that can solve the most ridiculous murders; who drowned a Nike sneaker, and who crushed a lady's hat and knocked out a cap plane, as well as monkeys reveal real murders, such that not a single person even dreamed of; with their help, by the way, they found out who killed Stalin, but decided to hide, and who was the main one in the conspiracy, they even found out the name of the Kennedy killer, but the authorities paid so much money for which you can buy so many bananas and coconuts that the monkeys immediately forgot, who was it and why did they decide to end it. Once one of them even had an alleged dream with Roosevelt, who promised him to tear off his paw, threatened the monkey that he would no longer be able to grab bananas with his hands and eat; the monkey swallowed her saliva, woke up in the sweat of her face and removed, burned and reworked all the developments and records of the solved murder - and it has remained unsolved until now.

But in the world of eternal light, people do not see each other at all and speak in cries, they do not even have dark clothes, everything dark immediately becomes dazzling white. One day, while flying over that system where the entire galaxy itself was only light, one Negro fell on the planet and bleached himself. Upon returning home on a white ship, in white trousers, hair, socks, shoes and leather, he was detained and demanded to tell where he had put the astronaut, and after two weeks of torture they found out that he was that astronaut; as soon as his passport was opened and a DNA test was carried out. In fact, they spent it even in the first hour of arrival, but after twelve the doctor of that clinic had a vacation.

And once, enemies flew to that planet at all, descended, gave flowers, joy, food, a lot of good, and flew away, but all because the blackness from their souls left and they brightened up. No one has been able to capture that world, and everyone lives in harmony, only now they are slightly blind due to their long stay on the surface. There is no reference point, either you fly in the void for a moment, or all your life - lucky are those creatures who have a ship that develops hyper-speed; before they are completely blind.

On the May holidays in Denmark, a portal opens to another dimension, from where leprechauns come and distribute a lot of money, and then leave, taking with them a bag of sadness, tears and terrible memories. That's why people in Denmark are so happy. They are waiting for that very day, they don’t scream and don’t get angry at their friends to scream at the leprechauns, and they collect everything in a bag from the ground, bow to the floor and leave, joyful, discussing speeches about how much and how much someone has collected pain . Immediately people arrange a holiday in honor of light and goodness, launch fireworks and hug, and then have children and raise new people so that they grow up good and give their sad cry to leprechauns.

Meanwhile, in Russia, people are buying a tablecloth with drawings, and not ordinary ones, but with a secret. No one knows what will be inside, it is not supposed to be known, but the price is always the same, three hundred and forty-two rubles ninety kopecks. What do you think this tablecloth is? Surely you have already guessed; self-assembly - you lay a tablecloth on the table, and from there grow those products that are drawn. There are also tablecloths with money and animals. From the balcony of the high-rise building, you can see seven little elephants and nine rabbits running around the kitchen. And it happens that someone buys a volcano out of ignorance, you should have seen ... they fry kebabs on them and cook a real dinner on a cauldron, pilaf or even better - shurpa, tasty and satisfying. Of course, the volcano lasts only a few hours, and you don’t need much for cooking. Who invented such technologies is unknown, either a god or a scientist. Perhaps the scientist that he was able to fit into the tablecloth the technology of materialization of things. Here's the fun ... well, tell me cool? Only I have not yet had to meet such people, the black market must be some kind, nothing else. But how much for just three hundred rubles, you can even pay off. Such a tablecloth is enough for forty-seven repetitions. You open it, close it, and so forty-seven times you look at the whole zoo. What if there are wolves? They'll bite to hell! And you kick and kick them like that, you hide in the bathroom, and they gnaw at the door. Scary, scary, and funny at the same time. They grab you by the toe between the gap under the door and drag you under it, gnaw, throw you from side to side, just have time to scream. You take off your sock, goodbye sock. and monkeys are a little smarter, they know that you can find a lot of fleas and lice in people's hair, so they are drawn to them, trying to open the door handle making each other, standing on top of each other a short flight of stairs, twist the handles; good people know how to close the latch. The poor fellows scream, throw clothes around the room, climb the chandeliers, jump on the windowsill and knock on the glass, seeing how people walk on the street - they knock on the window with a knife, but they just don’t have the strength. Then they run and dissolve on the floor and disappear. Here's a surprise for you in the tablecloth!

Oops… what is that! Look, magic, well, tell me, I threw fish cookies into tea, they became fish and swam to the bottom, jump out and swim. Wow. Eat dry, biscuits, and fish in tea, take it out and salt it, delicious. I love eating salty with sweets. Sometimes there are giraffes, they rush along the bottom, only the neck sticks out, hop and eat. Okay, this was five minutes to divert your attention from the most important thing, the end. Just kidding, not books, of course, but the lives of our universe. Today is the year three thousand five hundred and seventy-three, a war has begun outside the window of my house, robots and androids have come out, they are chopping off people's heads, launching atomic and hydrogen bombs, bombing cities and countries, people are dying, and damn it, robots are not at all afraid of radiation. It was lucky for me that I quickly escaped through the pipe in the house into the bunker, which I secretly built for seven days with the help of my android friend, who then deleted the memory dump, so that because of such terrible things as the war between our races, he would not come running to me and pull me out through the pipe and kill me. Whatever was there, but my friend never liked to betray his own. Even when the choice fell on saving me from death or going shopping for engine oil with a colleague, he chose the latter. So here it is - android. And I have always avoided these pieces of iron, who knows what they are thinking when they are silent, and when they speak, they simultaneously calculate a billion versions of the future, solve trigonometry, build submarines, draw drawings of rockets and save countries from starvation. I, even when I speak, cannot think of anything else than what to say after the spoken words, and how to build words correctly; that's what I think about all the time when I'm talking, and when I'm not talking, I think about how to speak correctly. I understand ... it's funny to you, but you yourself are like that; limited, am I right? Of course, right. You cannot draw diagrams of rockets and even build something without the help of the drawings that they drew - robots. Cunning bastards, even when you sit and do a task, build a layout on a printer, draw on a tablet, computers leave a loophole for themselves, so that later they can turn everything against you. Don't be surprised, I woke up one morning to find that my house was unprotected, the intercoms were turned off, the camera was turned off, the computer erased all data from itself, if I had not had to get up to eat, I would have died that day. Only the drawings of the bunker were on notebooks, which I burned after work. Here I am hiding... which they drew are robots. Cunning bastards, even when you sit and do a task, build a layout on a printer, draw on a tablet, computers leave a loophole for themselves, so that later they can turn everything against you. Don't be surprised, I woke up one morning to find that my house was unprotected, the intercoms were turned off, the camera was turned off, the computer erased all data from itself, if I had not had to get up to eat, I would have died that day. Only the drawings of the bunker were on notebooks, which I burned after work. Here I am hiding... which they drew are robots. Cunning bastards, even when you sit and do a task, build a layout on a printer, draw on a tablet, computers leave a loophole for themselves, so that later they can turn everything against you. Don't be surprised, I woke up one morning to find that my house was unprotected, the intercoms were turned off, the camera was turned off, the computer erased all data from itself, if I had not had to get up to eat, I would have died that day. Only the drawings of the bunker were on notebooks, which I burned after work. Here I am hiding... the computer erased all data from itself, if I had not had to get up to eat, I would have died that day. Only the drawings of the bunker were on notebooks, which I burned after work. Here I am hiding... the computer erased all data from itself, if I had not had to get up to eat, I would have died that day. Only the drawings of the bunker were on notebooks, which I burned after work. Here I am hiding...

Okay, you are not supposed to know the future according to our law ... therefore I will tell you about the children that live next to death. Before birth, children choose their parents on the screen, then they are born. Children live there all their lives, somewhere in parallel, grow old; that is, death has already been written when the child grows old and dies, and when he dies in that world (of old age, of course, having lived his life), he is born in the human - simply, and again young, forgetting his past life. Children live with death learning everything, and therefore, when they all grow up on earth, they already have their own character and already know how to live and how to act, and their parents do not teach them at all, it seems to them (at the level of instincts) . This is all done so that parents think that they taught them, in fact, their destinies are intertwined, and they develop regardless of training, spanking, parental instructions. That is, if he is capricious, he was capricious in that life, and they found his parents, who noticed his whim, and thereby introduced this capriciousness into him. The character of the parent and the character of the children are intertwined and predetermined, and even ... until the very birth of the parents. You might think that those parents dreamed of such a baby, and death recorded them and knew which parent the baby would choose. Maybe yes, maybe not, true or false, you won’t know this anymore, but such is fate, and there are no accidents in the universe. A baby was born on a “flight”, which means he had to appear, and this is no coincidence, this particular baby is needed for the future of the earth, for all of humanity, he will affect the fate of another baby, and that one on another, and so they will build travel cars, technologies , create drugs, open a limitless world without passports, whatever, or maybe this kid will be the next president who will change the whole earth forever. You should never think that accidents are just accidents, this does not happen and never happened. Everything is invented by people to justify their stupidity.

The swan king flew south all the time to catch up with the sun and get ahead of her, but he got tired all the time and went to bed, switching channels in a pocket house, which he carried on his shoulder in the postman. The postwoman raised her head and complained that she was lying on her sides, and that there was not enough broom for cleaning in the house, there was always dust, especially a lot of them when the swan king flies over deserts and savannahs.

He opened the folder, took the threads on his fingers and threw them on his hair, they clung to the skin and grew white. This meant that the information was received and the "hair" turned white from emptiness. In this way, people got their memories from folders on the computer, occasionally from tiny, velvet boxes for rings. People often pulled thoughts and memories out of their heads and stored them in this way: to forget something terrible. It used to be that maniacs got rid of the memories of the murder in this way, from all the memories, and the police could not get a confession through the lie detector and prove their crime. Some people, including writers, could be humiliated by friends and publishing houses, some people came to them and beat them, pulled out memories, plot, words and characters from the writer, and, a month later, books were created from stolen thoughts,

Werewolves and vampires live next to us, every night they come out and eat the living, become those who were eaten and live their lives. Often people go missing, this is not because they moved to another country, but because they were eaten without leaving even bones and hair, absorbed. Sometimes werewolves and shapeshifters can live the life of these people, but in most cases they remain alone at home, and the disappeared are never found. Of course, opponents of conspiracy theories and aliens will argue otherwise; they were kidnapped for experiments, and will soon return with renewed vigor, it is even possible that the aliens are collecting a new kind of creatures from the DNA of people that they will send to a desert planet to make it intelligent, that is, to adapt their DNA with the DNA of people so that they can to live in any other conditions besides earthly and space.

There are three worlds in the galaxy, and in each of them, in each first, an infinite other number; measurements and projections of reality and inventions of magic - on the same moon, far from BETELGEUSE, creatures live that turn into ear sticks every night, close the box and go to bed, and in the morning open the lid and go outside and go to work. You know, they collect energy in this way - there can be no other way, for all deeds it is needed - they sew trees, just like that, they sew from under the ground to the very top of the clouds, every damn day. Food grows from those trees. Sometimes a watermelon, a melon will grow, and another time a grilled chicken will be fried on a branch, and on the third - bananas or strawberries, and it happened that even - instead of some round and ripe fruits, sugar, salt and flour fell from the sky ; such a phenomenon was considered rare, and it was taken for a holiday, like snow. Often on such days you can see housewives who sacrifice sleep in order to harvest flour and sugar in order to bake a natural product - a cake, biscuit, muffin or whites. It was believed that if they were not collected in time, they would become tasteless - this was partly true, animals gathered for sugar, all kinds of insects and worms crawled for flour. One delay, and the food was thrown out.

Moons (sounds like oolong tea, but not about tea) have their own moons, tiny, barely visible from the surface. It is inhabited by gnomes. They extract iron from the core and exchange it for soil from another moon so as not to starve to death. It seemed that before it was huge, and itself had earth on the surface, but it was weathered like sand from under a cupboard during a draft; and only the hard part remained - the core. The iron was there for more than a hundred years, the dwarves pounded it with pickaxes, and loaded it into spaceships or threw it down, and the gravity of another moon attracted the fragments. Then earth was sent to their planet in an elevator to plant all sorts of crops. Corn was especially not picky, it grew even in the worst situation. Meanwhile, while some of the gnomes were mining ore to feed the entire planet, the rest was engaged in raising babies and getting water, building cells to store moisture and soil. Of course, it was difficult to extract water from space, but the dwarfs learned. Once every two months (and they don’t need much because they are tiny, barely the size of a book), they flew to neighboring planets, for example, to water ones, and scooped up a two-month norm from there, for watering and drinking. The rest of the time, "moisture cells" collected water from space, creating a reserve supply; for all unforeseen occasions. These could include pressure underfoot, and volcanoes that could burn crops. They did not always happen, but when they did, the water left instantly. And the fuel for starships is very expensive and hardly extractable, even from neighboring moons. Yes, all because the gnomes do not like the heat and can simply die of thirst. A liter of water evaporates faster than a hundred thousand liters, don't say. And in their tiny body there are even fewer of them - but, you had to fly up to the stars, fill the tanks with liquid hydrogen and helium, a quarter went on the way back, everything else was kept under the protection of several dozen gnomes, which were larger than the rest, and, of course, stronger . Who could steal them? No one could, from their own, but worms could crawl that ate fuel. They lived here all their lives and ate the heat from the sun and radiation. The gnomes hit them and smeared them on the core, those that remained, seeing their brothers and, as they were killed, cursed and crawled into the cracks in the core. Solar radiation is more attractive to them than lunar radiation. everything else was guarded by several dozen dwarfs, who were larger than the rest, and, of course, stronger. Who could steal them? No one could, from their own, but worms could crawl that ate fuel. They lived here all their lives and ate the heat from the sun and radiation. The gnomes hit them and smeared them on the core, those that remained, seeing their brothers and, as they were killed, cursed and crawled into the cracks in the core. Solar radiation is more attractive to them than lunar radiation. everything else was guarded by several dozen dwarfs, who were larger than the rest, and, of course, stronger. Who could steal them? No one could, from their own, but worms could crawl that ate fuel. They lived here all their lives and ate the heat from the sun and radiation. The gnomes hit them and smeared them on the core, those that remained, seeing their brothers and, as they were killed, cursed and crawled into the cracks in the core. Solar radiation is more attractive to them than lunar radiation. swore and crawled away into the cracks in the core. Solar radiation is more attractive to them than lunar radiation. swore and crawled away into the cracks in the core. Solar radiation is more attractive to them than lunar radiation.

On the top of Mount Everest, bison grazed and nibbled snow, producing milk for Bigfoots, the drink gave the animals growth and white wool, and protected them from frostbite in the harsh realities of the mountains. They came every evening and milked the milk of bison, in large, voluminous stone buckets. Then, after finishing the work, the bison spread their wings and soared high up, circled, played, and then went to sleep in the caves until the morning. Bigfoot covered them with large boulders. In the meantime, a little below them, through the mountains, a centipede was swimming, carrying children on its back to school, to evening; in the morning people could see them, here every day there were not so many of them, but, like a whole anthill, they looked for them at home, looked through binoculars. Children were taught that people are evil, that they will catch them and experiment, they will kill them, they will operate, they will take out their brains, they will experiment. The children were afraid trembled and were sure that the adults were telling the truth, and, in fact, they were. In order to protect themselves and their children, the Bigfoots became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people every year. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. that adults are telling the truth, and, in fact, they were. In order to protect themselves and their children, the Bigfoots became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people every year. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. that adults are telling the truth, and, in fact, they were. In order to protect themselves and their children, the Bigfoots became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people every year. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. actually it was. In order to protect themselves and their children, the Bigfoots became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people every year. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. actually it was. In order to protect themselves and their children, the Bigfoots became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people every year. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. Bigfoot every year became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. Bigfoot every year became guilty of missing tens of hundreds of people. The Bigfoots called their friends in the Himalayas and advised how to hide them all so that they would not be found. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. They told the Bigfoots to just bury them in the snow; and, on such an occasion, the Bigfoots set up avalanches and buried tourists and adventurers under the snow. So, at least it could be said that people disappeared because of the elements, and not because of the intrigues of the snow beast. And it happened that both bison and centipedes were to blame for everything, and sometimes, it happened to children as well. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. and centipedes, and sometimes, it happened to children. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows. and centipedes, and sometimes, it happened to children. The kids jumped into the tents of people and killed those while they were sleeping, the bison trampled them, pierced them with their horns to protect themselves, and the centipedes simply ate the poor fellows.

Surely, I can swear to you, you did not know that all products are stuffed with chemical elements that destroy your body; you drink milk, your teeth crumble, of course, this cannot be found out by any checks, they need to be consumed for a long time, but by accumulating in your body, little by little, they bring death to you, that is, for you to die earlier, it was still not enough, so that you receive a pension and ruin the country; thus, you will not even know that your teeth fell out because of tea or cookies, your stomach hurts because of potatoes, and your eyes do not see because of a donut bought in a stall. You then run to the hospital and pharmacies just to be cured, but you cannot cure yourself; you are again stuffing the body with chemicals to slow down death. You are devoid of reason, but instincts tell you that you must live in any case, no matter how terrible the consequences. Therefore, you spend your life on work in order to spend your life on treatment. And somewhere under your bed lies a mouse and rejoices that there is land near the lake, pulls a cigar high up and goes crazy, waiting for you to die to eat you and feed your children. And you rejoice at the delay, even more sick, but endure to see your favorite TV program a couple of times. It’s somehow inconvenient to miss a new movie from Marvel, because they are making such a beautiful movie. And you go to the movies, buy again chemicals, popcorn and Coca-Cola, you don’t even have a choice, it’s the same everywhere, only in the village people live well, and even there, they poison food with pesticides, and then occasionally complain about that they got a pimple on their face, or a centaur was born, or, even worse, Voldemort; wrinkled, terrible, like a flattened raisin. It was to him that all this was given, he will eat chemo and not get sick, because he got used to it for nine months in the womb. He can eat granite, drink poison, and eat poisoned bread. For the sake of such, damn them, the state again needs to invent new types of chemistry. This is how it happens, just think about it ... we thought, well, take a break, do not strain your brain, it will suddenly swell and you will die, it was not enough to become a person who made you at least sometimes think. But, at least so, you can make sure that you are not dummies. Distracted topics have always had a favorable effect on fools. I'm sorry, sorry... just think… we thought, well, take a break, don’t strain your brain, it will suddenly swell and you will die, it was not enough to become a person who made you at least sometimes think. But, at least so, you can make sure that you are not dummies. Distracted topics have always had a favorable effect on fools. I'm sorry, sorry... just think… we thought, well, take a break, don’t strain your brain, it will suddenly swell and you will die, it was not enough to become a person who made you at least sometimes think. But, at least so, you can make sure that you are not dummies. Distracted topics have always had a favorable effect on fools. I'm sorry, sorry...

In the meantime, we all walk with crutches under our feet, get poisoned and get sick, cacti-bees fly in the neighboring galaxy, waltz and tango teacher trees, balabol fish and a thousand small flies that compete in speed on the track, putting on an armored helmet. Mosquitoes and beetles slowly chase after them, laugh, rejoice. People also live next to them, they do not pay attention to those, they have long been accustomed to, because they themselves were not like that; they, of course, loved to work, otherwise they would dry up, and that's all for this reason; rubber people, as soon as they stop moving, they dry up and break, but when they sail from a long voyage to the pier, they knit a knot with their fingers, tear off their fingers and leave, the finger dries up and holds boats and ships. The finger, do not be afraid, you grow up, they often do this, to be honest, always. And in a dream, machines work instead, who pull and squeeze them while they sleep. Warm up.

And in the meantime, mermaid dogs swim under water, they save drowning animals and people, build attractions under the ocean, and hire scuba diving cats. Small orders are performed by skates, and clown fish will make people laugh, collect full houses, perform in circuses. Catfish is also there, sea, mustachioed, serious, which tells the audience who is coming out now. Instead of an elephant, a sperm whale comes up, and instead of lions, seals.

But if you swim out to land, gain strength and not be lazy, go to the library, you can find something beautiful, you just have to open the book, fairies will fly out of the pages and tell you fairy tales, the plot of the book, and even visualize them for you, send take you into the story, build near and around the scenery. Nothing, do not be afraid, they are harmless to you, it's just magic. And there are books that give you real emotions and complete immersion, for example, Kamasutra. From there, a succubus demon flies out and does with you everything that you only wish, all your dreams and desires; (only in such books do they live, they always need people to feed on their seed and desire, the more you ask, the more they rejoice and are ready to play with you. Forever), these books are in the forbidden section, where you can only get through a special token that is given to everyone who says what they need. There you can fight with Bruce Lee, Jack Sparrow, get into Atlantis, compete for the title of Emperor of Rome, see the gods of Egypt, or you can even become some kind of god yourself. Amazing place. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. There you can fight with Bruce Lee, Jack Sparrow, get into Atlantis, compete for the title of Emperor of Rome, see the gods of Egypt, or you can even become some kind of god yourself. Amazing place. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. There you can fight with Bruce Lee, Jack Sparrow, get into Atlantis, compete for the title of Emperor of Rome, see the gods of Egypt, or you can even become some kind of god yourself. Amazing place. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. compete for the title of emperor of Rome, see the gods of Egypt, or you can even become some kind of god yourself. Amazing place. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. compete for the title of emperor of Rome, see the gods of Egypt, or you can even become some kind of god yourself. Amazing place. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. But, the most terrible section, from where no one returned, the pages with space. There is no place for those who do not have the education of an astronaut, space reader or rocket engineer and a degree in the study of extraterrestrial civilizations. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build. They go away and never again and never return at all, whether they found worlds there better than them, or whether the world swallowed them up, that they were better than those who dwelt in them; unknown. There was only one engineer left in the country, who was assigned security so that he would never go to that section. The people of this world have long wanted to fly away from this planet, and they need rockets that only the last surviving engineer can build.

In one planet near the sun, however, further than our Pluto, there is a beach, where instead of sand, sugar melts from the heat, and they bathe there only at night when the sugar is crumbly. It happens, of course, that two-legged eggplants throw sugar into the ocean from milk, and it becomes sweet, melts in the morning and becomes candy by evening, but this rarely happens, and if it does, it disappears immediately, like cucumbers, hippos, people and bears they will take a bath with foxes, drink it; as they say, they need it, occasionally you can see those running with tea leaves in bags to drink tea until the sun has gone below the horizon; on a snowboard, right on the viscous sugar, they flop and rejoice, they wash the sugar off their faces, the caramel covers them all, but they lick each other when they come out; they are especially loved by monkeys that sit on trees, one has only to go out, they surround and lick, they really like sugar, more than bananas; those bananas are intelligent, run away, hide in holes, it is impossible to catch them. Bananas, like whales and dolphins, swim on the ground, jump out and disappear again, and they do this only in order to become softer, to become ripe. Why they do this is unknown, but then people eat them, buying purees in the store.

There is a big, lonely house in the woods, not another one for thousands of miles around, and there lives a forester, an old, gray-haired man. In the evening, moose and deer come to him, heaping brushwood and firewood on their shoulders; they mine them during the day, saw them, cut them, then drag them into the house, and sleep there until the morning, warm themselves. Somehow, at least, it is rumored that the elk sat on an armchair and spoke about life, how it is difficult for him to live in winter and there is very little food, and that he is glad that he met a forester who feeds him and his forest family. For the sake of this, the construction deer built him an extension to the house, where they could all live, of course, with a fireplace, so that it would be warmer, and the forester instead feeds them, instead of firewood, which he has long been unable to drag himself, even for sled. Meanwhile, the lions sit at the very top of the tree and look to see if enemies come to the forester's house, predators are different, terrible there. As soon as he sees, he jumps down from the tree and runs towards the enemy; the boxer mouse and the kung fu raccoon were especially difficult to handle. The raccoon climbed into the annex and ate all the food, and the mouse helped him gnaw a hole in the ground, from where they got inside. The lion fought with them, kicked with his hind legs, grabbed, hit with his paws, they tactfully stood up and maneuvered like a formula one car, from side to side, gave an answer, and pierced the lion's kidney. The kung fu raccoon grabbed the lion and threw it up, the boxer mouse hit him in the groin, and the lion flew off to the tree; but, getting angry, the lion grabbed the mouse in its mouth and tore it apart, that even the strength of the boxer did not help him with such frail paws, and even more so without gloves, they were very tiny, even though their blow was strong, that they could drill through the skin of a lion, but such wounds were unimportant to the beast. Then the forester came out with a bucket, he collected the bodies of mice and raccoons, made soup from mice, froze raccoons for tomorrow, and fed them to a lion. The lion spat and hated uncooked food, the taste was different, and chewing for a long time. Therefore, when the forester called him home in the evening, he took off his mane, shoes and sat down at the table, took a spoon in his paws, and, like a real gentleman, a tablecloth, and ate, telling the man how he spent the day today. After the hunt, he said, he went to the cave to the bear, and drank a little vodka for the repose of the souls of those whom he killed, they sang ditties, rap, then the lion went to his mother, who baked pies from sea bass and antelopes, smiled and clapped on the back so as not to choke. Soon tired, the lion fell on the carpet and fell asleep, in the morning, as you yourself know, cats sleep a lot, but always on the lookout, he was no longer in the house. The forester simply went out to the balcony of the second floor and threw the raccoons on the edge, where, soon, a lion appeared and ate them. Then he climbed the tree again, and on that tree a house was built for him, also with a balcony, and he sat there and watched the ill-wishers who coveted their property with the forester. Deer and Elk were not at all afraid of that, they worked together, and the lion always knew, as soon as he pounces on one of the forester's friends, no raccoons for you, no warmth, and even, by the way, a glass of vodka. He will sleep in the cold, and this is not very pleasant; you can die, he knows this firsthand, two years ago, when they were all born, his three brothers were frozen in the snow and died, now he is the only son of his mother, and therefore, his mother appreciates him more than anything in the world. and on that tree a house was built for him, also with a balcony, and he sat there and watched the ill-wishers who coveted their property with the forester. Deer and Elk were not at all afraid of that, they worked together, and the lion always knew, as soon as he pounces on one of the forester's friends, no raccoons for you, no warmth, and even, by the way, a glass of vodka. He will sleep in the cold, and this is not very pleasant; you can die, he knows this firsthand, two years ago, when they were all born, his three brothers were frozen in the snow and died, now he is the only son of his mother, and therefore, his mother appreciates him more than anything in the world. and on that tree a house was built for him, also with a balcony, and he sat there and watched the ill-wishers who coveted their property with the forester. Deer and Elk were not at all afraid of that, they worked together, and the lion always knew, as soon as he pounces on one of the forester's friends, no raccoons for you, no warmth, and even, by the way, a glass of vodka. He will sleep in the cold, and this is not very pleasant; you can die, he knows this firsthand, two years ago, when they were all born, his three brothers were frozen in the snow and died, now he is the only son of his mother, and therefore, his mother appreciates him more than anything in the world. as soon as he pounces on one of the forester's friends, no raccoons for you, no warmth, and even, by the way, a glass of vodka. He will sleep in the cold, and this is not very pleasant; you can die, he knows this firsthand, two years ago, when they were all born, his three brothers were frozen in the snow and died, now he is the only son of his mother, and therefore, his mother appreciates him more than anything in the world. as soon as he pounces on one of the forester's friends, no raccoons for you, no warmth, and even, by the way, a glass of vodka. He will sleep in the cold, and this is not very pleasant; you can die, he knows this firsthand, two years ago, when they were all born, his three brothers were frozen in the snow and died, now he is the only son of his mother, and therefore, his mother appreciates him more than anything in the world.

A thousand kilometers to the left, in the ocean, in a large cliff, swallows live, which help lost people get home. They, seeing how ships cannot orient themselves in space during fogs, and when there is darkness over the ocean, fly up to them, and squeezing the ship from all sides, cling with their paws and lift them up, and bring them to the coast. No matter how much you want to get into a wreck, the thing is that the wreck itself is looking for you all over the ocean, because the rocks here are alive and can swim everywhere, and maps cannot help, the rocks will float to the west and break two ships in the south seven, but if you see a rock, turn left, have time to maneuver, the rock will see you, blink its eyes and come to you on a ram. Rumor has it that once a kraken fought one of them and suffered a crushing defeat and no longer protrudes to the surface, but only because of them. It happens that when ships, huge, port, with goods, sail over the house of the kraken, he pounces on them and destroys them, thinking that this is his enemy. That is why it is still impossible to prove the existence of that creature, because there are no survivors, and those who survived are afraid. And despite this, they exist. As there are forty-meter water striders that swim on the waters, so fast that they raise ten-meter waves, tsunamis. You think that the weather is so terrible in the evenings, but it’s not, it’s all about them, they come out only at night so that they won’t be seen and chase, compete and look for food. In the daytime and with the light it is impossible to find where they live, only God knows; a wave will rise and hit the wave, the ocean will splash in all directions and it becomes scary. And then people see a rain of fish in their town, it's because the water striders were swimming close, raised a wave and the fish flew up high and fell over the city. It's still lucky that there were no cows that would have grazed near the shore. It wouldn't be very funny. You go to work, and on you, a cow falls on your head, then you immediately get a sick leave. Or a cow stopped at a traffic light and clapped on the hood, got up, mooed, walked five meters and fell dead, who will clean them up? Of course, a janitor, and no one thinks about it when they destroy cities and build such things. While those water striders are floating on the waves, Mafiosi sharks are swimming under the waves. They keep the whole ocean at bay. It would seem that they are stronger and there is no one, but it wasn’t there, here, next to them, dolphins live. You think they are all such goodies and are afraid of sharks, but they are not, everything is the other way around. Sharks are slow, and dolphins are quirky, nimble, they will pull out a machete from under the silence and let's go on the kidneys and on the fins of the shark, that she immediately seeks to escape. Not everything is really what you think. There is a war going on between them. Once, one shark killed a dolphin, that the next day, around their lair, no ... or rather, the whole lair of sharks is the whole ocean, all over this ocean, and one could notice a thousand corpses of sharks of various types, tiger, hammerhead, white; floating belly up. On that day, only the sailors were lucky, and even then, some of the sharks were gnawed.

Therefore, in order to find out about this, and who is involved, they nominated eagles and hawks as cameras that will record all the information that they see on the ground on a flash drive in their heads. There are a million or more of them, all fly over their territory and see everything. So it became public property. The hawk came to the office of the government, pulled the flash drive out of his head, gave them to those, and they, in turn, made a grandiose discovery that dolphins are worse than sharks and much more terrible, and they do not need to be angry in any way, and even more so somehow try to deal with them. Dolphins attack in a flock, and they have no pity.

The pelican opened its mouth and a large bee flew out of its mouth, followed by a bumblebee, they were very fond of growing flowers, for example, a bumblebee flew over the field and grew it, pumping daisies and dandelions out of its backside. Bees create bluebells, lilies of the valley, peonies and roses. And somewhere over the mountains big frogs fly, they come out of their hiding place only on special days, such, for example, can be considered the day when they are forced to guard their chambers from unwanted guests, one of them, of course, is a cactus flower that blooms only once in a few years, therefore, those of them who have immunity against cactus flowers go on the warpath armed only with the desire to destroy and save their females. Only males can kill, women from their tribe are too shy and timid creatures, why no one knows why this happened. But everyone thinks that those bastards, moles, were to blame for everything, they kept telling them about how their brothers died, and even the whole tribe in Australia, not one of them survived, and the poisonous flowers that fought with lightsabers and possessed telekinesis, they, by the way, could even control the air with their only thoughts, therefore they could kill the air around those moles, milk out oxygen, and they have no other choice but to die. And everything would seem ... but let's not talk about sad things and talk about why two drug addicts hang around behind garages and touch the art on the gates. It would seem that they are drug addicts for the whole head, why can’t they touch them, but it turns out, on the contrary, they see the real world, their drugs, let’s say, help them to know all the greatness of the worlds and dimensions that are hidden from our eyes . Sometimes, of course, they they cannot go in and out, just like those animals that offer their hands to them to say hello. So you stretch your hand and from there a hoof flies to you, this unusual hoof is a zebra, moreover, very intelligent, she will take off her hat and say “merci” and keep up the conversation about good weather. It's so simple, a real gentleman, nothing else, but well, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it's a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. that give them hands to say hello. So you stretch your hand and from there a hoof flies to you, this unusual hoof is a zebra, moreover, very intelligent, she will take off her hat and say “merci” and keep up the conversation about good weather. It's so simple, a real gentleman, nothing else, but well, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it's a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. that give them hands to say hello. So you stretch your hand and from there a hoof flies to you, this unusual hoof is a zebra, moreover, very intelligent, she will take off her hat and say “merci” and keep up the conversation about good weather. It's so simple, a real gentleman, nothing else, but well, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it's a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. this hoof is unusual - a zebra, moreover, very intelligent, she will take off her hat and say "merci" and keep up the conversation about good weather. It's so simple, a real gentleman, nothing else, but well, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it's a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. this hoof is unusual - a zebra, moreover, very intelligent, she will take off her hat and say "merci" and keep up the conversation about good weather. It's so simple, a real gentleman, nothing else, but well, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it's a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. after all, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it is a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more. after all, he lives in another world, there are such laws, such as he is, it is a common thing here. All animals go to work, stop at stops, catch a ride, just like us, they go to nurseries in childhood, only some chimps or people clean up after them, but all because there is no way, well, don’t say , but real fingers are needed, it is most convenient for them to hold shovels and a broom, squeeze tightly. Just don’t forget to feed them, they love this business, and even give a house, you don’t need more.

But, for example, now, by the way, I bought recently, maybe a week has passed, a picture, or rather miniature stickers on my computer. At night, he, Van Gogh, bought this, comes to life and tells me stories and cries, how unhappy he was in his worthless life, moves from one picture to another and shows what he had to endure, and how he painted certain things, how he didn’t sleep for long nights, smoked a lot of tobacco, walked through the night forest, watched the stars, took a lot of tea and smelled the flowers. Just think ... Yes, in my room, a picture of Michelangelo comes to life and kicks all the toys ass, I remember how I entered the room, and there the ninja turtle beats the poor Terminator with his nunchucks. I quickly ran to them in anger, my eyes burned with rage, fury, discontent, how dare he ... and even without me! And he began to beat the terminator with him, why all this entertainment goes to him alone, but as soon as he dared to act so brazenly and secretly behind my back. I love this devil, I would drink tea with him, only he drinks nothing but water, and he will die a virgin. But once he was an ordinary turtle, swam in dirty pissed water and did not even know that it was his excrement when they clogged between his nostrils.

It turns out that the fly that flies into the room is American spies, robots in which miniature people sit. So are cockroaches, you think that you tore off the head of this beetle, but no, it does not die, not because it is so tenacious, but because people are spies repairing it, but then they run away, and it dries up. And it’s not at all necessary to have some kind of wires to control the fly, those spies connect to them through nerves, and they drive like in an avatar movie, he who knows knows. They could, of course, also control animals, only you will definitely notice them, especially if their eyes show not one pupil, but ten pupils or even more, which will study you.

A lone swift flew over the city and wept, rain poured down on the ground with dreary eyes, people rejoiced. They didn’t know that because of the sad streams, showers come, palm trees and crops grow, and water runs along the rivers, they didn’t know ... Clouds always fly behind the swifts, trying to keep up with them. Then, when the swift dies, his soul flies into the clouds and becomes a cloud, and still does not forget to be sad about what he will never have. Looking down, the soul of the swift thinks:

“I wish I could become a man and know what it’s like to run and not be afraid of anyone, eat when I want and live where I want. To be friends with everyone, to know the beauty of films and painting.”

Never, alas, a haircut will not become a man, definitely not in this universe. But, we are well aware that the circle does not end on one planet, and they definitely fall on other dimensions and galaxies that are not in this time period. Yes, even in the past, he will be born a poor peasant, but free, not afraid of cats and hawks, dogs and people who throw stones at them, just because they wanted to.

Two monkeys jumped across the palate of the giant Peter and told how they cleaned their teeth, carefully, with a hoe, shovels and a sledgehammer. It was especially difficult to work with peas, which were stuck between the teeth, the sledgehammer almost broke and knocked the monkey's eye to the back of the head. But, fortunately, everything worked out, and they pulled out raw peas without any problems for themselves, they only had to dig out their teeth with a shovel. Then they put them back on with superglue, wrapped them with tape and duct tape. Everything that is wrapped with tape holds well, we still know this from the lips of Soviet popes. The giant, of course, did not do anything to them, it is understandable, the bound giant Peter Gulliver could not do anything in this case. They even removed his tongue from his mouth and a small tongue, too, so that he would not call for help and would not wake the monkey children who had long since fallen asleep. As soon as the giant opened his mouth, they stuffed a hippopotamus, an elephant and a crocodile into his mouth instead of rags. The giant chewed, chewed them and tried to spit them out, only the hippo bathed under the tongue in the dimple, the elephant held his teeth with his trunk, and the crocodile waltzed between the walls of his cheeks, now tearing off pieces, then sewing them together. The crocodile was a grandmother, he loved to knit. The elephant sang metallica all the time, the hippopotamus sang along, because he had been an opera singer for a long time - just now, just a long time ago.

Two elderly people were sitting on the street and discussing about girls, how they dress vulgarly and go for a walk with everyone, as their heart desires. Whether we are supposed to know or not, but, for sure, we have long guessed about it, because they envy them, because they themselves have never lived and walked like that, maybe they were not allowed, and now they regret it, envy. And, on this occasion, a tiny sparrow sat down with them, pecked at one, it became a seed, lived it, spat it out and said:

- You are rotten to the core, tasteless, overcooked, old and rotten, that's why you are very unhappy that you do not look after yourself, but for others.

A seed jumped on the bench, the second elderly took it and was about to spit out the husk, suddenly, for no reason at all, a sparrow sat on his head and pecked out the entire eye socket with the words:

“But you don’t know a lot, it’s bad to see a lot of things, you know. It was not enough to impose your negative energy on people, because all people are different and live the way they want, and you only know how to discuss others, watch how they walk and communicate, because they themselves were afraid of the opinions of others. Here, you better sit without eyes, so that you don’t see much.

The sparrow flew up to the branch, started up, and became a girl. Then she climbed down from the tree, completely naked, and walked past those two. One was blind and could not see, the other saw but was mute. So they didn't say anything to anyone. And finally, the girl went up to one of them and did something that they remembered forever, and you already understood everything a long time ago. She scattered the seeds on the bench so that the janitor would leave, and no one ever found that impudent one. Well, imagine how a seed with eyes, legs and arms lies on the street, you immediately gasp, be surprised, put it in your pocket and go to grow it at home, in an aquarium or terrarium, try to grow the same "tame", "foot" people. Ay, to hell!

Do you know that the samurai who seem so strong and beautiful, powerful and wise to you, are actually not such good people. For the sake of their desires, they will do everything in their power, and even kill a newborn, because the owner ordered so; some of them have masters, a house and a coat of arms; being lonely is a disgrace. And so, here, one samurai was so filled with his strength that he tore apart the galaxy with a katana, and all creatures, ranging from goblins, wizards, aliens and other powerful creatures, began to fall down into even greater darkness that had ever existed in the universe, into this darkness, all good beings became evil, filled with blackness and rushed to neighboring worlds in order to move into the bodies of people - that’s why there are so many evil people in the world, because once a samurai tore the galaxy all over the universe up and down; the souls of the dead and the creatures that left their nest rushed to places where they could reach. The earth became one of the havens of these monsters, and their souls clung to the bodies of earthlings, people began to get angry, kill, lie and enjoy the pain of others. And only a samurai could drive them out, but only he was alone, and one, unfortunately, killing people, let's say, is not such a quick and easy task, and, all the more, he will be better than those he kills if he kills people himself , isn't this becoming a monster?

But, once, far before the days when there were no samurai in the world, pharaohs lived, they buried the bodies of their "gods" in sarcophagi, put decorations, books and food in the coffin. And those, in turn, during their lifetime promised to become the defenders of the worlds. And when the world began to change, people began to do stupid things, the pharaohs came to life. The mummies were furious at what had become of the world, and they began to exterminate the wicked. They devoured their souls, killed, took away the evil, incinerated that one day they themselves became the evil they promised to fight, and now the whole world, even the evil and the good, stood opposite the Mummy in order to exterminate the evil that is worse than them. For thousands of years they fought for a brighter future, for the future of their children and mothers, and in the end they finally won and were able to seal the pharaohs back into their own sarcophagi. But before the coffin slammed shut, they all promised to return again. And to prevent this from happening, evil people began to come up with other tricks so as not to wake up the dormant evil - they began to do evil not always, but sometimes, in most cases, remaining good; cooking, serving people, entertaining them, so at least they could earn the money they loved so much. That it could be easier to deceive people who think they're getting quality when they really aren't. People accept, thinking that the price is acceptable for them and for the institution, they do not doubt it, because the more expensive the thing, the more valuable it is. It was in this way that people were able to leave the pharaohs in the coffin, but they themselves did not die after them, having found the trick to live on. in most cases remaining good; cooking, serving people, entertaining them, so at least they could earn the money they loved so much. That it could be easier to deceive people who think they're getting quality when they really aren't. People accept, thinking that the price is acceptable for them and for the institution, they do not doubt it, because the more expensive the thing, the more valuable it is. It was in this way that people were able to leave the pharaohs in the coffin, but they themselves did not die after them, having found the trick to live on. in most cases remaining good; cooking, serving people, entertaining them, so at least they could earn the money they loved so much. That it could be easier to deceive people who think they're getting quality when they really aren't. People accept, thinking that the price is acceptable for them and for the institution, they do not doubt it, because the more expensive the thing, the more valuable it is. It was in this way that people were able to leave the pharaohs in the coffin, but they themselves did not die after them, having found the trick to live on. that the price is acceptable for them and for the institution, they do not doubt it, because the more expensive the thing, the more valuable it is. It was in this way that people were able to leave the pharaohs in the coffin, but they themselves did not die after them, having found the trick to live on. that the price is acceptable for them and for the institution, they do not doubt it, because the more expensive the thing, the more valuable it is. It was in this way that people were able to leave the pharaohs in the coffin, but they themselves did not die after them, having found the trick to live on.

And by the way, if you noticed and were attentive and liked to fantasize, like the author of this book, then you have long been thinking about what is in the pen, or rather the ink that flows through the sheet through the ball at the tip of the paste, this is a real cosmos. In this small paste there are a million planets invisible to us, a hundred worlds, a trillion black holes, which, although they cannot suck us into their dimension, can suck the white color of your piece of paper. That is, when you write, you do not overlay with black, you replace white with black, and the color goes into another dimension. Just like with black, there are red universes, blue, green and yellow, just as different as you can imagine. Occasionally, atoms get into another dimension through space on your pen and become someone else, a completely different being, what connects with the atoms of those galaxies; as everything is unimaginably cool, isn't it? Or have you not thought about it? But who knows what you are only thinking about and what you are wasting your precious time on, if not our thoughts and fantasies, you live boringly, I will tell you, and I will be right.

Глава 5

In France, for that matter, there is a person, he is unique in his kind, but no one knows about it yet, and his uniqueness lies in the fact that a person has a certain device that he created in his garage. Well, as in a garage, in an apartment, in a corridor, which he equipped according to his needs. It was there that on weekends he sat in front of a lamp and made that invention. Just think, fifteen years, for almost a quarter of your life, every day. The only pity is that he did not make a device for rejuvenation, because someone else made it, but already in Italy. We have gone completely off topic. So... So what's the peculiarity of it, is this;

If you take a bed, you can’t drag it with you on a hike, you can’t take a TV, a chair and a house with you, you can’t put a rocket or a car in your pocket, and this device makes it possible to suck everything into your pocket bottomless dimension. The backpacks she never fill up, making room for others. The more things you put into a device resembling a matchbox, the more and more the emptiness inside expands, and the dimension eats itself up to make room for another. As soon as you want to leave the city, you are simply tired of living in your own city, everything is so bad and tedious, there are so many cars and noise. A person opens a box, directs a laser at his house, she sucks the house into herself, only by pressing one button, and finds herself inside, if a person wants to go on foot to that place, he takes a car into the dimension so that, when he changes his mind or gets tired on the road, by pressing the same button on the side face, he will be able to call it and ride it. Of course, you are very interested in how this device knows what exactly is needed for it, what should be released, and not “spit out” everything in a row, it’s very simple. By twisting the ball-button on your finger, you choose a color, and each color is something from that dimension, that is, if you press red, a car will certainly come out, green is a house, blue is a tree, yellow is food, purple is something something else. Quantum measurement, measurement of all possible things from all possible universes in all galaxies that have ever existed, that is, imagine how we stand in a room and for us it is the same size as for others, but imagine how outside staying the same house, the same room, inside this room, all other rooms from all possible universes from the past and the future, from all the infinite multiverses that ever exist in the dimension of time and outside its space are combined - in a word, add it all to a small room, we get an infinite amount of space without end and edge, where the entire known universe with all the planets, stars and worlds can fit, there will still be an infinite amount of space. This is called a pocket dimension, out of time and space, like two bubbles merging into each other and creating from exactly the same size, something more than it can be. It's like taking a liter of water and adding a liter on top. It seems to be supposed to pour out of the bucket, but it creates a liter from a liter (actually two), but without changing its material and visible space. That is, you pour water into your dimension, it goes into another, but does not disappear from yours, and when you start drinking water, it comes from other universes, from those that you have ever done in the past in the moment and the future, in the same way as here, that is, by pouring only a liter of water, you can get a billion liters, because all your versions from all other dimensions have done the same. Who understands, he understands, who does not understand, still understands.

And we move on to the next page...

The girl ran inexorably fast, the life of the living under her flowed inexorably quickly. She was spinning a roll of toilet paper, and the paper itself represented the passage of time. The faster the girl ran, the faster time passed on earth.

And so, she saw a bandit who was walking somewhere with a knife, and immediately began to set new time records, that, while that bandit reached the appointed goal, he disintegrated into atoms and became dust from old age. The knife fell next to the cake, the daughter raised the knife and cried, he was not a bandit, but he wanted to surprise his daughter, he returned early from work and wanted to cut the cake and congratulate her on her birthday. But time cannot be returned back ... There are legends that, in order to repair the damage received by the treadmill, the “Girl of Time” made her immortal, and she is always young. But even more unhappy than she was - she will never meet her father in the next world, and she will lose everyone she loves. Heard on the time radio on one of the planets that this girl flew into space to overcome the entire galaxy in order to find that miracle girl of time and take revenge, only no matter how many questions she asked before answering, all aliens disintegrated into atoms. The "Girl of Time" skillfully hid under the sink of Ilya Petrovich in the city of Petropavlovsk. Ilyich, looking at her, saw a chipped shell on which sat a spider and a particle of pollen from flowers. On these pollen, bees danced at night and several Succubi arranged a disco.

And there was a lonely hermit mosquito in the world that was engaged in blood affairs. He flew up to people and sang blood from them with a tube and flew away, then flew back and drank again, where he dragged them is unknown. Of course, the people from whom the mosquito drank remained alive, and realizing this, the mosquito flew to other places, looking for others to drink their blood - so that those from whom he drank many times would not leave the world prematurely. But it turned out that he got a job in a hospital, where he brought donated blood to save the dying for free. When people waved, the mosquito pulled out the certificate of the hospital worker and they lowered their fists - the mosquito was inviolable and did good. Even flies and wasps gave way to him when he flew. Previously, there was no need to arrange traffic conditions in the sky, now starlings fly there and control the flow.

Above one city, where the heat had been for the third month, not a single water had been seen by the earth for all the time - large clusters of butterflies flew, they flapped their wings and created hurricanes, people went out into the street, opened windows and became happy.

Elephants ran in Africa, building lakes, storming the earth with their trunks to the very core and trampling all the hills around so that the water was filled in them. One day, Poseidon crawled onto that pond and took a dip, and, they say, he still lives there - you won’t go out in this heat in the sun? Poseidon saw how several fish, having received the praise of God, jumped out of the water with joy for just a few seconds above the waves, as they immediately became dried, salted fish. You can't do without sunscreen.

Twelve months faced a choice whether to eat ice cream or not. Ice cream trembled, holding a spear in his hands and said:

“Pain and suffering awaits all of you!” Do not dare to approach me, otherwise I cannot vouch for myself!

The moons looked around among themselves, took their hands off the floor with the other two hands, and then began to greedily lower their mouths towards the poor ice cream to eat. And then... the ice cream jumped on one of them, and pulled out a tuft of hair from his armpits. July was shy and ran away, then the ice cream jumped on the face of December, he somehow looked like Lenin, and March like Stalin. Only February was DiCaprio, and distorted his face from blizzards, fires were burned on his face and Santa Claus and Snegurochka sat, fried kupaty and warmed themselves. An ice-cream spear was thrown, it pierced Frost's eye socket, he got up and jumped on the Snow Maiden and beat her:

- How dare you! he shouted, but in the end, having torn all the clothes of his companion, he came to his senses and buttoned up his trousers.

- Why did you remove the kupaty! We wanted to eat! the Snow Maiden shouted, tucking her dress into her skirt.

September grabbed the ice cream by the leg and ate it. Suddenly it came out of his ear and let's tickle his eardrums with his foot. September died of tickling, pierced his brains with his finger.

- I told you! I warned you all that with me Shu ...

Santa Claus grabbed the ice cream and sent it to a bag, where several elf gnomes grabbed it and made a dimple-pimple out of it.

Jokes aside. We fly into a world of magic deep underground, where two trolls and one magician live, who brews a potion against hunger. Launching over the planet, bread will grow all over the earth, and all kinds of fruits and berries on trees, smoked fish and chicken on birches, kebabs and meatballs on bushes. And the earth will always be wet, and the wind will always be cool, and it will drizzle every half hour. Two Trolls will build a paradise from the largest tree, where they will receive the suffering and the sick. There the Magician will heal people from leprosy and diseases. Everything has only one side effect. When the Magician disappears, all his deeds will disappear. Even the energy he gave through food. And consequently, everyone who ate this food will die dry, from hunger, from thirst and lack of vitamins and minerals. Is suffering worth heaven?

Round square triangles, inhabitants of the fifth dimension, climbed the mountain, the view of which changed from different angles and they represented something completely different, at different viewing angles. They didn’t run for long, until one day, a thousand and two years later, the mongoose stumbled upon a huge deer that was sitting on a stump, near the entrance to the rabbit’s house and drinking an orange martini, straight from a tube with an umbrella. The deer looked at them, and proudly stood on two hooves, straightened his tail, as if he had stepped onto the podium to dance, and going to the round square triangle, he said to him:

“You don’t make your own laws here, my laws are made here.”

And then the inhabitant of the fifth dimension came into a rage and became an elephant, hit that deer with his trunk, took away the martini and sat on a stump.

Laws are made by those who are the law.

I could not believe the stump that it was being used so brazenly, having heard how they fight with swear words that the author did not voice, grunted, got up, threw the elephant to the side of the forest path, and claimed the rights to this place:

- I, this is the very thing, the grandson of the one who is my grandfather, and the son of the one who is the father, and who has always owned the local possessions, here are my laws, and you will be kind enough to do good deeds for my benefit and earn a place to be here, respecting all rights and duties of my house, deer!

The deer did not even understand that he was insulted, he grinned, and on that he was glad that he was called so respectfully. The inhabitant of dimension number five, only this stood sideways, as soon as this order sounded, immediately deer antlers appeared on the head of the elephant, and he fluttered, becoming a butterfly, and disappeared into another world. Residents of the fifth dimension never violate the laws of the places where they come. This stump turned out to be a new inhabitant of the sixth dimension, whose words are much more powerful than his five-dimensional ones. Rabbit, meanwhile, watched from the house, chewed croutons and twisted his finger to his temple, then went to the kitchen, sat down, turned on the TV and started watching his favorite series, Doctor Who in the world of noodles during the Second World War BC.

And Duncan, a neighboring boy from the leopard constellation, has a worker - a lizard, he goes out to order early in the morning, and takes food; worms, zoophobuses, flies and fruits. He takes tools with him and builds whole castles for kings and deputies, others, the poor, order only a bathhouse and a barn, there is no money for food, therefore their lizard builds, sometimes from straw, sometimes from promises, and on the most generous days, - cardboard. But one fine day, all the poor gathered at the statue of freedom of Stalin, and the worship of Lenin, matured and went to war against the rich, and in the meantime they hired lizards, and the reptiles created a whole wall of rocks that it’s impossible to get over it at all, all the more , at the very top sat a hundred dwarfs who also worked for food, but also for the house that the rich man built for them - dog kennels - and threw pebbles at those climbing on the wall, and sometimes they poked spears in the eye and kicked in the stomach. A mole crawled out of the wall and bit the poor leg and closed the hatch. The dwarf grabbed one beggar, and threw it on the edge of the rocks below, which caused him to shatter into small marmalades, and fairies grew out of the marmalades, they took off, grabbed the dwarf gnomes, soared up to the clouds and threw them down. The gnomes waved their arms trying to take off, but they couldn’t, but they couldn’t die either, because out of nowhere a jet flying penguin flew in, squeezed them into its claws and threw them to the whales, where Kitter Pokitter sat, conjuring ridiculous spells. What spells were there, alas, no one knows, there were not yet those people who survived after meeting with him. They say that Voldemort appeared because of a spell from a whale. and threw it on the edge of the rocks below, which caused it to shatter into small marmalades, and fairies grew out of the marmalades, they took off, grabbed the dwarf gnomes, soared up to the clouds and threw them down. The gnomes waved their arms trying to take off, but they couldn’t, but they couldn’t die either, because out of nowhere a jet flying penguin flew in, squeezed them into its claws and threw them to the whales, where Kitter Pokitter sat, conjuring ridiculous spells. What spells were there, alas, no one knows, there were not yet those people who survived after meeting with him. They say that Voldemort appeared because of a spell from a whale. and threw it on the edge of the rocks below, which caused it to shatter into small marmalades, and fairies grew out of the marmalades, they took off, grabbed the dwarf gnomes, soared up to the clouds and threw them down. The gnomes waved their arms trying to take off, but they couldn’t, but they couldn’t die either, because out of nowhere a jet flying penguin flew in, squeezed them into its claws and threw them to the whales, where Kitter Pokitter sat, conjuring ridiculous spells. What spells were there, alas, no one knows, there were not yet those people who survived after meeting with him. They say that Voldemort appeared because of a spell from a whale. after all, out of nowhere, a jet flying penguin flew in, squeezed them into its claws and threw them to the whales, where Kitter Pokitter sat, conjuring ridiculous spells. What spells were there, alas, no one knows, there were not yet those people who survived after meeting with him. They say that Voldemort appeared because of a spell from a whale. after all, out of nowhere, a jet flying penguin flew in, squeezed them into its claws and threw them to the whales, where Kitter Pokitter sat, conjuring ridiculous spells. What spells were there, alas, no one knows, there were not yet those people who survived after meeting with him. They say that Voldemort appeared because of a spell from a whale.

Whether we are joking or not, we cannot say this, we ourselves do not know, for a long time we have lost our nose for jokes, therefore we joke as best we can. But it’s not about that, is it, because Merlin knows for sure that we don’t know how to joke, so he follows us around and explains to those who do not understand our humor. So, once, while walking through the forest, we stopped near a tree and explained to her that it is impossible to grow here, that the path was created for people, and the tree, with its greatness, interferes with people and makes them get lost. Then Merlin waved his hands, read some strange word to himself, the tree stood up, bowed to us, and ran along the path to the river, and in the evenings you can hear the tree somehow playing the violin and singing, and wild animals gather near and dance . And where there was a tree, now a field.

Forty-nine Scandinavian gods, which were invented by dolphins during the flood of Atlantis, told terrible tales about land to children of dolphins. They say that there are old people on land who catch fish, pull them out on the sand and make them suffocate, and when they die, they do not stop there, they take them home, cut them, take out the insides, then bread and fry them on a fire, then in a frying pan, and sometimes they boil it in water, then eat it. Fish and dolphins trembled with fear, and once made a pact with sharks to catch people and kill them so that people would not kill their children. So, until now, sharks attack people, devour them and rejoice. They do not attack dolphins, because dolphins are the mafia of the seas and oceans, they drown and cut sharks in a joint, a flock, they beat and mock, they have no pity, their hearts have long become black - the grandchildren themselves do not remember, how long does it take. Thor went to the center of the round table, threw a hammer on the floor and shouted that he would not give people offense, and pulled an island out of the water, making land out of it, on which a million fish and dolphins died. One did not agree with what happened, he hit his son in the stomach and sent him to purgatory, for the sake of punishment, turning him into an ordinary person. People then gathered on that island, thousands of years ago, called this place Atlantis, and none other than Odin himself sank them, to the detriment of his son Thor, since then it has been impossible to find that place. Because of the senile attacks on Odin's brain, due to his old age, he forgot where he drowned, but Thor did not remember. One did not agree with what happened, he hit his son in the stomach and sent him to purgatory, for the sake of punishment, turning him into an ordinary person. People then gathered on that island, thousands of years ago, called this place Atlantis, and none other than Odin himself sank them, to the detriment of his son Thor, since then it has been impossible to find that place. Because of the senile attacks on Odin's brain, due to his old age, he forgot where he drowned, but Thor did not remember. One did not agree with what happened, he hit his son in the stomach and sent him to purgatory, for the sake of punishment, turning him into an ordinary person. People then gathered on that island, thousands of years ago, called this place Atlantis, and none other than Odin himself sank them, to the detriment of his son Thor, since then it has been impossible to find that place. Because of the senile attacks on Odin's brain, due to his old age, he forgot where he drowned, but Thor did not remember.

In the ocean under the thickness of the three-level sea, there are several bloodthirsty socks that have never eaten meat and never drank blood, but they are sure that they are predators and uninterruptedly attack the grass, thinking that green juice is blood, nothing else, otherwise it would if it wasn't for blood, the grass would live without it. Once a crowd of gopniks from socks, in every family there is a boobie who spoils the whole family, attacked a family of stingrays and gutted them. So they thought when they were eaten by a stingray, and they swam inside it on giblets.

Two lonely old men were sitting by the sea and fishing, and one of them did not notice how he threw the other into the sea on a hook and caught a mermaid on him, who has been walking in girls for a long time and she needs anyone to get married. So her mother punished her, otherwise she would have kicked her out of the house, and there she herself has to buy food, cook and clean, and so, she can, having found a man, live on his pension, though a little poor, but there are a lot of fish in the sea, and mermaids love eat fish, and the old man will have to listen to her. This is their law, their husbands are their slaves, they send them to get fishermen from land to cook them on volcanic lavas under water, frying, and eating. Killer whales, sharks, and deep-sea fish predators come to this smell, and then it catches the mermaid of those killers, piercing through with love. There are legends that the mere sight of a mermaid makes fish leave the world of bloodthirstiness and become ordinary, anger and a sense of instinct disappear in them, they do not want to attack and immediately fall in love with them, girls take advantage of this and kill them. Once, the girl’s mother caught a big whale and threw it on a stone to the surface, tied it with sticky starfish, and he, who could not distinguish himself, dried up there, died, then the mother salted the whale, and ate with beer at the father’s birthday party .

In one desert there were houses, multi-storey, beautiful, but no one built them here. They drank all the water from the earth, ate all the greenery and living creatures, then got up and went to another place, migrated. So, in houses, in apartments - water did not come from the water pipe, but from the earth straight to the tap, distributing it among the inhabitants. The house was kept so clean, because people looked after it. They washed the floors, made repairs, painted, protected. Anything happened, if you think and remember. Once, two or five times in the same city where they lived, a war broke out, all the windows were blown out, a hundred houses were destroyed in that place, and the destroyed houses were repaired with a prosthesis for the house, dead pieces of plaster and brick. So, when the buildings were looked at, one could notice that the yellow walls somehow turn into orange or green, so this is a prosthesis, they no longer see with this eye. Disabled people without legs were left at home to die. Only now the terrorists rebuilt those houses, and the buildings happily spent their days, until one day those whom they considered good bombed the city and destroyed not only people and their children, but all houses and settlements, trees and parks. Scorched earth.

Who would have thought that tiny, five-fingered, seven-eyed people are running along the edge of a knife, who, if they stop, will fall down and die. This is a knife, people think, that cuts, in fact, the speed of those people makes it possible for them to pierce everything they touch.

Let's fly away from these places, we have not learned anything new in principle, Aristotle spoke about this in his lectures about aliens who settled in our world.

Here, in the room in which the author writes, in the kitchen where many stories are happening, there is a column that is capable of emitting a dance, LED waves, these are multi-colored people who are created by music and fly out into the kitchen, coloring it in aquamarine, in a rainbow, into multi-colored cobwebs of sadness and joy. If you stretch out your hand, you can see how they jump from air to hand and dance there, then waltz, oh tango, and sometimes break dance. They are built in the fly, and when the opportunity arises, they walk in the air in formation, swim and fly, stroke the auricles with a dance, so that we are pleased. How we will behave depends on their dance, sad or happy - their dance is art. Every moment of their movements is one big cosmic miracle, not from this world, of course. They came to us from distant stars, years ago. The first person to find sound spawned them on the ground. Since then, they cannot leave our planet. It happens when you and your friends like the dance of neon people, it means that you are on the right note of friendship, and you made friends right. For those who know how to make friends, all music is equally pleasant for both you and them.

All objects on earth have their own spirit, for example, when you pour boiling water into a cup and mix tea in it, those leaves release a color, and this is the blood of those dead people in bags that are mistaken for an inanimate product. Then, dying, they stain boiling water, milk, and when you drink, you can see steam on the surface, this steam is the spirit of those leaves.

In a distant galaxy, bypassing three multiverses inside three million other multiverses, lives the only living representative of the human race, pregnant with a baby - who lives on the launch vehicle Marium-971. There, oxygen soon runs out. It would seem that the baby and the mother will die in excruciating suffering, but after giving birth to the baby, the mother becomes a ghost and envelops him with an aura to protect her son, that he, overcoming the whole universal problem of loneliness, becomes the first and only person who knows how to breathe in a vacuum. So, the kid falls on a cold, scary planet, on the surface of which terrible ice monsters live, they chop rocks and ice with their jaws. Many monsters freeze at nightfall, then thaw in the morning, but not the boy. He is found by a tiny beast that hides from predators, saves and grows underground. Every evening, while the parent falls asleep from the cold, the boy, because of the cocoon of the ghost mother, does not freeze, and makes a detour around the planet, having time to come home in the morning pretending to be asleep. The mother, of course, who raised him, thinks that he, too, freezes at night. The kid grows and grows until he becomes a real man, and now, speaking the language of the one who raised him, he talks about his adventures. Soon, delicious pieces of meat begin to appear at home, the meat of those predators that fall asleep at night. The boy killed them and brought them home so as not to die of hunger. Years later, a new era began on the planet - the era of underground animals, when all the monsters were exterminated. This could not last long, there was not enough food, therefore, the ghost mother left her son and enveloped the planet to create a new ecosystem. The planet melted, trees and plants began to grow on the surface, eternally sleeping animals came out, which were considered extinct by all those who lived after them. The cycle of life has begun all over again. From a clean slate, from a happy slate. So, one surviving person from some notorious, old rocket saved the whole planet from complete extinction.

But here the story does not stop, whence through space, tearing apart the matter of space, a Gorilla falls on the planet. This species has long been known on the land that the boy has never seen and did not know, and the sight seems to him a novelty, and he does not think that a beast that has come to visit can harm, only now, the beast does harm. He begins to eat everything around him, instead of his stomach, a scarlet black hole is spinning. This is the destroyer of worlds - Gor the Gorilla distorted. It distorts space and time, travels through matter, breaks space, destroys galaxies, first eating everything that is on the planets, then the planet, and then the entire galaxy, leaving a wasteland. Holding out his hand, the boy realizes that the beast did not come with goodness, and runs away from him, climbs into a rocket that has collapsed several years ago, and takes out a plasma cutter from there, with which he is trying to kill the monster. One salvo and the gorilla is ready, but unfortunately not this one. Gorilla Gorilla eats them, and they find themselves outside of time and space, outside of multiverses, but in one single universe where everyone lives ... All kinds of all worlds once destroyed and disappeared. We, considering him a fiend, did not understand that he was the savior of the worlds, that he saved those who were supposed to die. So, in that world, the ghost mother's spirit became real. Yes, all because there is no time here, and where it does not exist, something cannot be completely destroyed, and what is destroyed there, in time, where it is, here, where it does not exist, time, that moment, when it was gone, no one was destroyed, because it never was and never will be in this space. but in one single universe where everyone is alive… All kinds of all the worlds once destroyed and disappeared. We, considering him a fiend, did not understand that he was the savior of the worlds, that he saved those who were supposed to die. So, in that world, the ghost mother's spirit became real. Yes, all because there is no time here, and where it does not exist, something cannot be completely destroyed, and what is destroyed there, in time, where it is, here, where it does not exist, time, that moment, when it was gone, no one was destroyed, because it never was and never will be in this space. but in one single universe where everyone is alive… All kinds of all the worlds once destroyed and disappeared. We, considering him a fiend, did not understand that he was the savior of the worlds, that he saved those who were supposed to die. So, in that world, the ghost mother's spirit became real. Yes, all because there is no time here, and where it does not exist, something cannot be completely destroyed, and what is destroyed there, in time, where it is, here, where it does not exist, time, that moment, when it was gone, no one was destroyed, because it never was and never will be in this space.

Of course, it is amazing that people who once died can reunite with each other and rejoice, share happiness and sadness. Well, someone does not have the opportunity such as, for example, Agatha Christie, who became a grain of sand on the beach after death. Every day she observes darkness around the same grains of sand that surround her. It melts in the sun, then the waves drown it, how can one rejoice, only suffer. Once a mermaid sailed to her and told a story that there is a magic diadem at the bottom of the sea that grants twelve wishes, but no one ever found it, no matter how many days they searched. Agatha Christie was delighted for the first time in her life, but all because she has all the infinity of the world to get to the bottom of the sea, to find and make a wish to become anyone, but not sand or stone, even a hawk chick, or a flea,

The world is a beautiful place where elephants sing about life in the seas, how they catch fish with their trunks, then return home and roast them on the stove, on coals, eat and turn into people. The parrots that fly forever in the Amazon, pulling their throats, calling everyone into the web of danger to enjoy human suffering, a world where cockroaches build roads, where peacocks draw rainbows in the sky with watercolor brushes, and red cats create comfort and warmth, and paint the sunset orange. This world is amazing with its embellishments, wherever you look, something is happening, something is dying, and something is being born. Who knows what it is, but everyone is sure that it is something dangerous, beautiful and kind.

Look at the mountain, a boy runs out of there, and what does he have in his hands? Some kind of carry-on luggage, a suitcase or a bag, no ... close by is a cigar box, you open it, and inside there are a hundred small, grain-sized cars, taking them out and throwing them to the ground, they increase in size. It would be half the trouble, but what's interesting is that many of these machines are built on the basis of artificial intelligence, a robot that knows what the boy wants. Here you are, you get into it, and ice cream with pistachios, strawberries and mangoes flies from under the hood right into the passenger seat, and from behind, a game console flies in to play on the way home. And the boy himself does not drive the car, and the AI, knowing where to go and why, sometimes even turns on the navigator itself, shows places with store names, tells the history of places to interest the boy. Though, The AI is so programmed to interest the boy in the purchase. Of course, the boy does not yet know that he will be an eternal debtor when he is twenty-one, and he will pay for everything he ate and where he went, where he played and what he drank. AI more and more lure such people so that their debts grow, so that the state treasury becomes richer. For non-fulfillment of obligations, people are executed publicly, in front of thousands of mice, worms and lonely northern winds that roam from one end of the planet to the other. Adult people have long gone to work, somewhere out there, in the mines, they hunchback, extract minerals in order to repay a debt. It would be nothing if milk for thirty did not cost three thousand, and how many of them were consumed in a long life, you will never pay off. So, at twenty-one, all people went to prison and lived there from dawn to dusk, eating hardly twice a day, because this meal will be paid from their pocket. Life was up to twenty-one years, then you are a slave of the state.

And somewhere very close, on a neighboring planet - it flew here from a black hole, and began to spin around the sun, the same people live. Those people, it's us - only from the earth, which is from another star system of multiverses, a copy of ours. Yes, but they live there not at all like we do, the laws are different. They grow animals on those planets from test tubes with replaceable claws, interchangeable eyes. Instead of cutting the claws of cats, there they take them off like some kind of shoes and hang them on a hook, and the cats scratch, jump, but there are no claws, hell and teeth are also replaceable - they put them on when they feed. So, all the animals on the shriveled planet cannot bite and injure anyone, and wild animals are plush toys that anyone can play with and cripple. It happens that a bear walks in the forest here, and his body is large, but only with a beam from a pistol, what those people from another land invented and created make those wild animals absolutely fluffy, so light that one wind from under the fan is enough to fly them away. Such a bear will lie on you, in appearance you can’t distinguish it from an ordinary blanket.

Once, through the porthole, one astronaut noticed a flying corn. On that corn sat a huge rider beetle. He, at least so it seemed, was a horseman, and always saddled corn, not from Khukhra-Mukhra, they called him here a rider, a tamer of a corn cob. As it saddles the corn, as it pulls on its tendrils, it shrinks, and emits vapors of love, so they overcome the space of space. In the common people, the astronaut called corn - a farting stench. From that, traces in the sky at night can be seen. But the beetle is cunning, where can something stinking come from corn, he did everything himself, but it seemed that corn. Once, when a rooster, choking from lack of air, was flying through space, well, just like that, it flew out of the earth, wanted to see the world, and as soon as it gave “love” to the nose of the rooster, it immediately cheered up, began to cackle, cock and aggro, soared to the very top of space, hit his head on the ceiling and flew down, straight to the ground. They say that Pegasus caught him there, and took him to a neighboring farm, where they made barbecue from birds for sale in Magnit.

Survived, but at what cost? A couple of weeks of freedom, then a table for a meal, here it is the life of a cock. People eat and laugh, but no one wants to know about the fate of the rooster.

In one universe, unimaginable things happen. For example, let me not lie, there are children, but they live their lives only up to seven years, and after that, they go to the store and buy for a human life time - the life of animals, dolls that they put on themselves and become animals. So, when someone wants to become a builder, they put on a doll of a beaver, bullfinch, and when they want to be hunters, then a tiger, bear, leopard or jackal. It happens that mothers, in order to be even closer to their children, put on dolls that they do not like. Many children hunted their mothers and ate them. So, when a baby puts on an Elephant doll, the mother also follows him, but if you put on some other one, they become enemies to each other. And there are children who end up wearing these dolls, they want to be people, they are sent on a shuttle that flies in the orbit of the planet. So many people live there how much is given to them. On that planet, after all, many sometimes want to become death, dress up dolls, and die. They die and become them, and start taking those who die. Feeding on life after death, those children become even stronger, and now they can take people and animals at their discretion, having done some dirty trick. And then people think it's a coincidence.

Not many have heard of such a planet, but many have been there for a long time - this is a world where all people are drawn and fictional, and when someone really wants such people to meet on their way, they emerge into reality when people themselves want to see people who are pleasant to them, invent their character and their shortcomings, those people become a reality, and as long as you or someone else remembers them, they exist in the body of people as a mirage. When you do not remember them, they just simply fly back to their world and wait for you to talk about them. I wanted to call, you call, and they contact you, become real, and as soon as you stop making contact, they are not in the world. Here you are just mirages that exist here, because children, neighbors, friends and some of the passers-by remember you, maybe they want to see you, dreams about you, dreams, it is worth forgetting about you - you die, for real. You don't become. Perhaps when, after death, you are remembered, you walk there, in the world of coffins and the dead, and observe, rejoice that you have not completely disappeared from the world. What a joy.

And then bam! And now you are already a tree and watch how two monkeys do karate, how an orangutan extracts honey on a tree, and a wild boar draws a place on the ground to plant carrots and tomatoes. Then, in a hurry, an elk runs out of a cave on a mountainside, wiping his forehead with a hoof, and tells everyone that Put has arrived .... Immediately all the animals become people, get on their feet, build houses, lay tiles on the ground, ennoble the whole area, then the Elk, having completely rested, repeats:

- That's the thing, Blue whiting has sailed, waiting at the door, waving his cane, demanding worms!

The animals exhaled, screwed up again, began to fight, swear, and the Leopard descended from the tree, yawned, went out the door, then returned, cleaning his fangs with a toothpick.

“Yes, there is no one there,” he said and burped, only the bones flew out. She grabbed the leopard's mouse by the paw and arched it, broke its paw, slapped it on the soup, pulled out its antennae, swept the entrance near the mink and laughed.

- I've never met such pussies! I saw everything, he ate this carp, you son of a bitch.

- I have nothing to do with it, he is like that! - a female muzzle appeared from the tree, it was the Bitch-leopard - mother.

Went down.

That's not how I raised him. I didn't raise him at all.

- As, however, no one educates, but only looks so that he does not choke on a stone!

After that, the roof of the dollhouse opened and a human hand flew in, grabbed them, tore off their heads, played with them and threw them back into the chest. They say that a Tyrannosaurus Rex appeared there, but the truth is without eyes, because he did not become a tyrant. Everyone stared at him because he was disabled. Everything happened in their world, when someone is more disabled, he becomes a laugh for others, when their problems are exactly the same as his.

But if only there was laughter… people on leashes with dogs, peacocks, giraffes, iguanas, and perform tricks, cook food, clean up after their owners, chew and spit out solid food. They joke belly, feed, carry in their arms, and meanwhile the animals receive a salary for walking people on the street, looking after them, sweeping yards from their poop, and fertilizing gardens and orchards.

In the future, everything is so beautiful. Only the guy who sat in the kitchen and watched the transmission, the only one that showed the time hundreds of years ahead, the surveillance camera in the house where there was once a store, live a few people. Opening the door, their clothes are immediately changed to home clothes, this is the work of nano robots, they make a T-shirt out of a shirt, and slippers out of sneakers. In the future, there is no need to buy expensive clothes every season, go to boutiques, try on socks, T-shirts and jackets, wear uncomfortable shoes that do not fit on the catwalk. Nanorobots have adapted people's lives in such a way that, having bought such a set in a matchbox, you can forget about money and buying clothes. So, a guy, standing on the floor, nanorobots climb up to his feet from linoleum and change heavy sneakers for slippers, and make his shabby hairstyle smooth and beautiful, styling. They clean their teeth instead of brush and toothpaste, rub the body with shine, killing and destroying germs and dirt accumulated over the whole day. Remove left in the eye and body, give good spirits. When the charge ends, the nanorobots themselves receive energy from the sun or household appliances nearby, absorbing the magnetic field, electric field, and charge. If it happens that some nano robot is damaged and out of order, others repair it. When a mistake occurs in words while writing a text by a person, and fatigue makes itself felt, nanobots fly out of the sleeve, erase the misspelled word and rebuild the ink into the correct letter and word. It sometimes happens that way, feeling that a person is already completely tired, they write down lectures, household chores, work, and then reproduce information in the mind or sew information into the brain, and in order not to harm the mind, sometimes, they just show everything that was recorded on the screen. They say on TV of the future that some people have learned to use them like bullets and kill people.

At the table they were always ... envious. Previously, they existed in a world where a creature called a demon tempted everyone, called and beckoned, ruined lives, then the ruler of hell did not like it, that with envy of others, he began to destroy hell, because these devils were released to earth to destroy people . Therefore, among them you can meet envious people and those who discuss others behind their backs - they themselves do not know that demons and devils, but they are sure that people, and all people are the same as they are. Where did they come from, from their hair it was possible to grow an octopus out of the ground by throwing it on the surface of the magma. Those tentacles played with the bodies of demons to please their vanity. Then, when all the beautiful things ended and they hit the ground and forgot that they were being pleased, they became dissatisfied and hurt others so that they would be happy. The goblins couldn't stand it therefore they took brooms and beat the demons, because they distinguished well those who were real and who were fictional. So, having beaten a few, they saw that it benefits everyone, and became the bosom enemies of the demons that mocked them. The demons could not stand this and ran away, they lacked the courage and patience to argue and fight with the goblins. Quick creatures, and much more cruel than the demons themselves.

One boy drew scribbles on a notebook and said, but do you know what is more important when comparing the usefulness of the sun or the moon? There is a big difference between them and the most important thing is the moon, of course, because the sun shines during the day when it is already light, and the moon at night when it is dark. That boy was still small, he was not even three years old, he stuck out his tongue and was glad that there was still a moon, because how else would you go for a walk at night with friends and kick the ball on the field when the sun is hiding? The boy rejoiced at the moon more than ice cream, which his father bought when he came home after working on a combine. The harvester was actually the most unusual, the kind that fly across the sky and collect airy, white and fluffy clouds on the backs of soaring camels. There were rabbits sitting on those camels and running their hands over the top of the hump, smoothing out the clouds and pressing them down to fit more clouds. Descending at sunset, the sun then got tired and moved away from the earth, the clouds lit up with ultraviolet, sometimes coloring the sky in orange, yellow and red, and sometimes in the color of kiwi and the moon. Why the color was called ultra, the boy did not know, but dad said that it is useful when ultraviolet gets on the skin, helps us live. The boy wanted to understand, asked to buy him purple paper on which he would draw the moon, and thought that it was true, purple paper is also useful and makes life convenient, especially when there is no white paper for drawing. On such papers, very beautiful eggplants and squash are obtained. Downright alive. They were also like that, it was worth being in the house there was nothing, they took out paper with eggplants and threw them into an unusual cabinet in the corner of another huge cabinet, and by closing and then opening the door, one could get real food, here is the same eggplant, edible and alive. One day, dad, having come home after a difficult, but no less exciting job, noticed that his son was sitting with some kind of animal. He approached him, bowed and was surprised. On his son's knees sat the most unusual and fantastic beast that his father had ever seen in his life - an ant the size of a cat, he had glasses on the bridge of his nose, and in his hands a card, turned to him and spoke:

“Join me, my dear, here with your son we are learning to play cards, while we do not quite understand how to do it, but we are already close to the goal!” Those who don't give up will always learn something. That's really how it is, sit down, now I'll make you some tea, we will discuss the strategy of attacking a deck of cards on the table.

An ant pulled out a cup from under one of its paws, and from another teapot and already quite hot, the steam went up, picturing sea ships and huge steam locomotives that hummed and people waved from the windows, smiling and rejoicing at something beautiful. Here one of the guys got up, shouted something, opened the window and threw a bouquet of roses tied with a ribbon. The bouquet fell to the floor, the ribbon untied, and inside was a paper with congratulations on the victory over Nazi Germany. Father sat down, pulled out small handfuls of sweets from his pocket and put them on the table. The ant puffed on an imaginary pipe, pouring smoke, thick, like after a bath in cold weather. A little man jumped out of the smoke and fell on his side, then got up, dusted himself off and began to open the candies one at a time, jumping from one to another, to a third and so on, until he reached the last one, and passing his hand over his forehead said that he was tired and did not fall on the table. It was a candy man, he checked their edibility, don’t let some bastard put poison there, his duty was to look at poisons, drive out parasites, so that everything was tasty, and no one complained. Before the smoke cleared, the little man stood up and jumped into it and disappeared, dissolving just as he had come running from some dimension of magic.

“Everything is fine, sir, we can start our meal,” the ant whispered and grabbed four cups in his paws, gave one to the boy, another to his father, and two to himself. You see, he very much loves to drink tea in two cups, one seems odd to him, and what is odd is not tasty at all. One to quench your thirst, the second to feel the taste and aroma of tea.

So the boy had a pet friend. It used to happen that he would go into the kitchen, something rumbles there, beats, either a plate, or whose heart, the father returns, and in the kitchen everything is already ready for dinner, there is a lot of delicious things there, something that was not in their life, and what the boy said that he and his father love. Cooked a lot.

“It’s a pity,” the ant said, one day, looking at the sky and watching the stars, how a huge black snake with white contours swam across space, swallowing the planets, “That you don’t have a mother,” then sighed and laughed, “However, even without a mother Life is going. I don't have it either. You are my mothers. The one who educates is the mother, the one who gives instruction is the real parent. Well, in fact, the way it is, you drew me and raised me, who are you if not her, because a mother cannot have a sex. Births are very different. I read your human books, there, here, Pinocchio was, after all, he didn’t appear from a man at all, but thanks to a man, they created him, like me. He is a father and a mother and a father.

They listened to him, and wept that once upon a time they were created by a real mother, of a female appearance, but she only became the choice of the god Hades, and leaving them, she married him. True, not by choice, Hades himself came and took her away, killing her, leaving his son alive. The father says that the son died that day, but the mother was against it, and concluded an agreement so that the son would live, and she became dead. Only photographs remained in the house, as she smiles and looks at her son for the last and first time, as a silhouette is visible behind her, the shadow of the god of death, which stretches out his hand. My father flew on his combine all over the planet, trying to find the place where the entrance was to the world of the dead, he didn’t find it and lowered his hands, and his mother, apparently, sees them through some kind of magic ball, crying, because in the mornings it’s dry still weather, a drop of salt water appears on the forehead of the son and father, and on the cheeks there are red marks from kisses.

That closet has always been an attraction of miracles, it happened that a boy would wander into the head, draw and send it to the closet, and thick smoke would pour out from there, something would sparkle, and some dwarf with an ax would come out, coughing, and declare that he had come to the aid of those whoever is in need will go out into the yard, see into the distant forest, run there and bring firewood home. And then, the very thing ... an even more incomprehensible beast will follow the dwarf, such big nostrils, and black-black hands, some arrows and pieces of iron behind his back. He will follow the gnome, spread the pieces of iron on the ground, collect something, and pull out the arrows, run after the gnome into the forest, and now he will bring you some kind of game, cut and make a barbecue on the arrows. And that iron mangal. And the hands are black, because they always work in the heat and the coals touch them. The dwarf and that man will fry a barbecue, chop wood, disperse mosquitoes and flies that fly by the smell, and cry that they will soon be kicked out. The ant approached them and said that the mother would not give up her creation, everything in the world has a use and purpose. So, the dwarf and the man who did not introduce himself as who he was, either gremlins, or a critter, left to explore the world and help those who needed them and were starving. Occasionally they come with game, fry and run away. And in one of the days, the dwarf came at all with a girlfriend, feasted on his father - a boy, in the face of his mother, that there was no difference, and a week later they had children. They lived for two months at most, drawn gnomes, then grew old from the sun and died. That's why the moon, boy, loved more. Where is it, ultraviolet gives usefulness and joy? It turns out that it is not for everyone. All drawings faded and disappeared. Therefore, the boy began not to draw “alive” at all and put them in a closet, but only out of necessity he painted food and transport for games. I have matured and become smarter.

And one day, when the boy already wanted to go to school, his father flew in on a big dragon, there were books and a briefcase in his shirt, leaving them, the dragon bowed and disappeared.

“The dragon of knowledge,” said the father, “comes in those days when children grow up and are ready to go to school.

But have you heard that before the cabinet got into the family of people, it lay for a long time at the bottom of the sea and belonged to the family of fish. They came to the surface to people and asked questions that they wanted, to which they received an answer. The fish, which learned to speak the language of people, having visited the closet, where it had a language and a brain that it drew for itself in imagination, declared to those who asked that they bring her drawings of what they wished. Previously, the cabinet was much larger, slightly smaller than a skyscraper, but definitely larger than the Titanic, or memory is cheating on us, and the water distorted the reality of its height, but in the end, on land, it dried up and narrowed down to the size of a wine cabinet. Some asked for a huge house, which they received, and the whales dragged the house on sleds, and threw out the pterodactyls that flew in from behind the mountains of Kilimanjaro, too, as it should be, they were drawn to help fish fulfill their desires, while others asked for a wife, but were disappointed, because people quickly switched their love to others, more beautiful and smart. people didn’t really like it when someone became very attached to them and walked on their heels and shouted that they loved them very much. Of course, it would not hurt to be smarter, but when you are happy, you don’t think much with your head. But, one day, some old man, they also call him an old man, shriveled like a raisin, looking like a real drop fish, caught a fish and did not believe it, fried it and ate it, and then the desires began to exist, until one day the sea not dried up, but instead of him, and a magic closet. Monkeys found it, played for a long time, hardly learned how to use it. The only thing they knew how to do was think of bananas, draw a line on a palm leaf and throw it into the closet, and he gave what they asked for - bananas, a bunch and mountains of bananas. And then came the moment of colonization, and the jungle was cut down, and the monkeys were evicted from their habitat. The locker was found by representatives of the museum. They did not find it useful, except that it was as old as the Mayan civilization itself. They kept it for the time being, until some rich man bought it. Soon the war began and the castle of that rich man was destroyed, and the cabinet was lost. Many hundreds of years later, he got to the grandfather of that combine operator, and so the secret of the locker was inherited and kept in the family. They kept it for the time being, until some rich man bought it. Soon the war began and the castle of that rich man was destroyed, and the cabinet was lost. Many hundreds of years later, he got to the grandfather of that combine operator, and so the secret of the locker was inherited and kept in the family. They kept it for the time being, until some rich man bought it. Soon the war began and the castle of that rich man was destroyed, and the cabinet was lost. Many hundreds of years later, he got to the grandfather of that combine operator, and so the secret of the locker was inherited and kept in the family.

What happened, then passed, no one was interested in the history of the old, dilapidated locker anymore, on which the trace of its existence was lost on the pages of the archives.

From these worlds we are flying into the thick of space wars, into the thick of where children only exist, that adults have died after they have reached thirteen years of age. The planet itself was killing them, but there was no explanation for this, but none of them complained. They appeared from flower buds, up to five years they were fed by a plant, extracting minerals from under the ground, nourished with milk, extracted leaves from animals that ran under the stem, twisted them and fried them for several days in the hot sun, as if smoking. Then, the children went into the world, the flower let them go, and they were already getting food for themselves. Only males lived on one side of the planet, and females on the other, and they hated each other because they did not understand why they needed representatives of a different sex of the same species. The women were capricious, and always screamed and hysterical, which is exactly what they did not like - the boys. And a cosmic war began. To outdo each other, they began inventing weapons, building fortresses, equipping houses with cannons, constructing rockets and starships to attack from the sky. But, none of them could have imagined that another sex of the same species would be able to achieve the same success as them. The nuclear war lasted for centuries, children reached the age of thirteen and died, passed on knowledge in scrolls to other generations, who from birth inherited the knowledge of reading and writing, how this happened is unknown, it seemed that everything comes with mother's milk. That war lasted for many centuries, that everyone began to understand that nothing good would come of it, and you need to look for a way to live on, and not die from a very young age. The Millennium War ended with an agreement that enthusiastic genius scientists will look for a way to live beyond thirteen years. And they found it ... Having stopped drinking milk, and leaving the mother flower immediately after the opening of the bud, the children became adults. Real adults have already appeared on the planet, they are thirty or more years old, they are smart and quick-witted, and women are not inferior to them in development. Scientists have learned that what gave birth to them is not of natural origin, that they were created by those who once lived here, but disappeared, and the equipment for cloning people remained. Those mechanisms once every few days left the ground, and under it there were poisons that were detrimental to the body of living beings, which were not filtered by the bud and were fed directly into the tiny mouths of children. This poison killed the body slowly, but always. Medicines were created quickly, antidotes were plentiful, and children, that appeared from the bud were immediately injected with antibodies to the poison. Soon, the last babies raised from the bud were on their feet, and the machine that created them was destroyed and recycled into another, less dangerous thing, the production of essential medicines and food and canning factories. Children finally learned that what they relieved when they drank can be an equally better way to reproduce. How the planet reconsidered all this, how people who lived a long time ago knew that at the age of thirteen many of the children became adults, they would have known ... only the breakdown decided that not a single life of children is important, that thirteen is a good number for death. Children simply fell asleep, yawned and never woke up again, but such death is better than cutting pain. Finally, the children became adults, disarmed their installations, and made canteens out of missiles, however, they flew and changed places. Everything had to be re-learned. And even motherhood, and care. Kindness and compassion. To learn again to endure and understand the thoughts of others, to accept the bad harrow of people, not to get angry, to tell the truth.

Then night came ... the snake swallowed the planet, and its body is a big black hole, but on the other hand it is white, which dumps the planets into other worlds, dimensions, and there are already completely different laws, different needs, and many new species live there, which on the contrary, they are not against unleashing wars in order to seize territories. Fortunately, maybe unfortunately, their planet fell into white space, where it was always light, and at night, instead of the moon, several suns appeared, at least seven, which made the planet dark, and so the night fell. The sun became the harbinger of darkness. And the children realized that the planet is huge, and in the next few hundred years they will look for ways to colonize the nearest planets and look for ways to leave a mark in space. They believed that the white space was open to them not just because someone definitely wanted them to get here, so faith appeared in the gods, and soon a new hatred for those who did not believe in them ... these wars never end, only none of them know yet that in fact they are small bacteria on a tiny grain that lies under a light bulb, and the light is nothing else, just a switched on lamp under which giants from another dimension are dancing. And black dots are nothing but dust that flies around the room, and the sun, which brings their world into shadow, another bacterium flying by.

In ancient times, there was a society of people who changed their appearance by sticking cockroach whiskers, mongoose paws, or cobra fangs on themselves to become what they wanted to be, but were not. Indeed, pulling out some tiger tooth from their pocket and inserting it instead of their own, they turned into animals and could afford the same thing as those animals. Thus, some solitary human people inserted many alien paws, fangs, antennae into themselves in order to become animals and mate for pleasure, because they were afraid to make love to their kind, or, for the most part, were afraid of it, sexless women themselves; especially the fact that before class you need to walk and beg for a long time, look after and give unnecessary gifts, present sluggish flowers that can hardly survive two days in water with sugars, on some vase, for the sake of some hole, instead of a hand. If you give a chocolate bar, the girl will make you nervous so that you justify your action, either you want to see her fat, or so that her butt sticks together. There was no explanation for this, no doubt. So, when a girl became somehow tense and angry, human beings drank the blood of cobras and crawled under the sand. It also happened that a woman would take an eagle's feather and put it on her head, become a bird and fly away to freedom, from which men limited her. It flies enough, then returns and becomes a turtle so that no one shouts at it, but it has always been calm. They say that turtles do not have hatred, or maybe fish, at least the turtles did not stand on their hind legs and did not box with women in order to teach them a lesson and show them their rightful place, only whose law it was unknown, but not prescribed in the nomenclature, people performed by instinct. Men, on the contrary, were not against it, no matter how stupid this word sounded in this context, they were not even surprised that their wives became turtles, because men also turned into turtles in order to prolong pleasure for many hours, and what is it do turtles need it? In order not to be asked to raise a paw, which almost weighs like a truck, for a motionless and lethargic animal, for sure, and to throw a few blades of grass and worms that cost ten rubles in any fishing store, that’s enough. to prolong the pleasure for many hours, and what do these turtles need? In order not to be asked to raise a paw, which almost weighs like a truck, for a motionless and lethargic animal, for sure, and to throw a few blades of grass and worms that cost ten rubles in any fishing store, that’s enough. to prolong the pleasure for many hours, and what do these turtles need? In order not to be asked to raise a paw, which almost weighs like a truck, for a motionless and lethargic animal, for sure, and to throw a few blades of grass and worms that cost ten rubles in any fishing store, that’s enough.

Of course, among people there are those who become crocodiles and take revenge on those who offended or humiliated them, hurt them and created human anger in them, which is not characteristic of other species, to which you say an offensive word, they will turn into a predator and swallow it whole, so as to disgracefully was. And those, you see, will become a worm in the stomach of a crocodile or some kind of bacteria there, which itself is restored, restored, then become an elephant and tear the crocodile apart - revenge for the sake of revenge. This is how human species were such dangerous future beasts. True, it happened that the brain died in these species at the time of reincarnation into an animal, they forgot who they were, walked with an animal's tooth all their lives, died as animals. So, for example, those people who were declared missing, just forgot who they were, and did not return back to the human state. They got lost. Maybe,

One day, God forbid, this would happen, but this would not have happened, because the Lord did not exist in that world, all people managed their own lives and were their own masters, of course, they thought so. At first, they thought that they were the highest and most intelligent species on earth, and then they learned that the cosmos is huge, ad infinitum, and so many things live among them, and their world is just a grain of sand in a large beach, and other species walk along them. Who told them that their species was created in the likeness of the most intelligent creature is unknown, but ordinary plasticine was reasonable, because the shape of the species did not yet say anything about the fact that the species was smart and quick-witted. Having once become the largest sea star that dares to travel through space, and having overcome the boundaries of multiverses, people discovered that beyond the galaxies, there is another world - magical. Something like magic but created by that species. Everything around them was alive, even if it was a stone that lay near a rotten tree, and that consisted of many universes and galaxies that were molded into each other, a whole stone of billions of universes the size of an atom. Whether it was a leaf on the ground, the air that they breathed, the sun that shone in the sky and its rays, all this was alive and everything lived and existed in every particle of it all. You sit and look at the wallpaper decorated with roses and different flowers, and what lives in them sees the world as red on a rose, orange at the edges of its universes, and each color is a new galaxy with its own color of the cosmos, and there are millions and trillions of planets. a whole stone of billions of universes the size of an atom. Whether it was a leaf on the ground, the air that they breathed, the sun that shone in the sky and its rays, all this was alive and everything lived and existed in every particle of it all. You sit and look at the wallpaper decorated with roses and different flowers, and what lives in them sees the world as red on a rose, orange at the edges of its universes, and each color is a new galaxy with its own color of the cosmos, and there are millions and trillions of planets. a whole stone of billions of universes the size of an atom. Whether it was a leaf on the ground, the air that they breathed, the sun that shone in the sky and its rays, all this was alive and everything lived and existed in every particle of it all. You sit and look at the wallpaper decorated with roses and different flowers, and what lives in them sees the world as red on a rose, orange at the edges of its universes, and each color is a new galaxy with its own color of the cosmos, and there are millions and trillions of planets.

On that evil day, bedbugs sat at the table and discussed that with people moving to other galaxies, therefore, there was less food, and there was not enough blood, that the meat that was had long been rotten and unfit for consumption. Gritting his teeth, the bug squeezed out the last drop of blood from the bag onto the table and, with a smooth movement of its paws, divided them into five parts, among their relatives. After drinking the last drop, the bugs sighed, then looked at the clouds, there was a huge eye looking at them, from some other part of the galaxy, not on their land. As if he pierced their planet with his gaze, sensing the presence of bedbugs on it, trying to see, either to kill, or to pull out and save. Whatever you say, people didn’t engage in genocide, even though it happened before, out of stupidity, but so much water has since flowed into space, the oceans have spilled over the entire galaxy, crawled away through space and ended up on other worlds, created many new species, creatures, plants and bacteria. What is not a miracle, if the miracle is real? So much water, and how much life in them ...

And then, as soon as some person became a woodpecker, it was not even offensive when his wife called him a woodpecker, in fact, and his wife was always a skunk, and stank all the time. She squeaked and squeaked, scaring everyone away from herself, but, alas, she could not guess that she was so nasty. And why did she need it, she accepted herself as she was, and she didn’t eat any skunk hair, no fang or tail at all, she never saw them, she rarely looked into mirrors, she was afraid of those who will look at it from there. After all, mirrors were ... a door to secret worlds, worlds of miracles and magic, to a world where the ordinary could not be called ordinary in their world. So, on the streets you could meet a giraffe in a cap, and with the inscription “express bus” on the side, and the body was a separate car, with windows and doors, and a grandmother was sitting on the roof, throwing a fishing rod at passers-by, and bring out the evil in them. Children ran around here with wheels instead of legs, and a pump instead of a mouth, their eyes were two cups, from which tea and coffee gleamed. At the other end of the same city lived a horse-carpenter, and his friend Rhino-blacksmith. On top of the mountains, teaspoons flew and sang a song of troubadours deeply and with a bass, and below a herd of pot fleas grazed, which collected dew during the day and distributed it among insects. And in the minks it’s scary to say with whom the foxes and ferrets lived, scarves-fifty legs. They fed on poplar fluff, and in the evenings they slightly threw the fluff back, so that seamstress sheep would sew turtlenecks and sweaters for little children from them. And for adults, the migratory coat threw off the wool, waving its arms, flying from the wet to the dry side of the continent. The city was inhabited by barber stools, which instead of the rounded edges of the legs were blades, and a hat on his head. They wielded deftly with their feet, and they always cut their hair bald. On the streets you could see helicopter tea bags that buzzed around your ear, and when you poured hot water into a cup, they flew up and drank the water and dyed it black, green and red. And instead of beggars, machine guns were sitting, threatening passers-by, and they were always in the black. Then the machine guns got up and went to orphanages to give everything they earned to tiny, defenseless children, small Uzi pistols and tiny MP-7s. Kitchen knives roamed the alleys and wielded vegetables, cut off the ends on their heads and cooked soup, treating the hungry. In all likelihood, miracles are just beginning at this, because behind the next street, next to the store of funny memories, there lived poisonous clowns that sting with their eyes, and taking away the pain, crying, giving only the most delicious to those who contacted them. Buffalo-headed monkeys always ran with them, they looked awkward, they seemed to have been suffering for a long time and they needed to be killed, only these monkeys each time spewed out sweets and marmalades from their mouths, and treated the sweet-toothed ants and bees. There, look, some ant sits behind the ear and drinks cider from sweets with a wasp and two bees. He licks his paws from honey, look at him, hides, probably, he is afraid of bees, they will give chapalakh in the face! And the bees are unusual, they have three heads, three eyes, one for each, and instead of paws, they only have needles at all, but they sting with a soldering iron built into the belly, and inside that soldering iron is raisin syrup. As soon as the skin comes off the meat, two paws take salt out of the bag and sprinkle it on the wound. they have been tormented for a long time and they need to be killed, only these monkeys each time spewed out sweets and marmalades from their mouths, and treated the sweet-toothed ants and bees. There, look, some ant sits behind the ear and drinks cider from sweets with a wasp and two bees. He licks his paws from honey, look at him, hides, probably, he is afraid of bees, they will give chapalakh in the face! And the bees are unusual, they have three heads, three eyes, one for each, and instead of paws, they only have needles at all, but they sting with a soldering iron built into the belly, and inside that soldering iron is raisin syrup. As soon as the skin comes off the meat, two paws take salt out of the bag and sprinkle it on the wound. they have been tormented for a long time and they need to be killed, only these monkeys each time spewed out sweets and marmalades from their mouths, and treated the sweet-toothed ants and bees. There, look, some ant sits behind the ear and drinks cider from sweets with a wasp and two bees. He licks his paws from honey, look at him, hides, probably, he is afraid of bees, they will give chapalakh in the face! And the bees are unusual, they have three heads, three eyes, one for each, and instead of paws, they only have needles at all, but they sting with a soldering iron built into the belly, and inside that soldering iron is raisin syrup. As soon as the skin comes off the meat, two paws take salt out of the bag and sprinkle it on the wound. afraid of bees, chapalakh will be punched in the face! And the bees are unusual, they have three heads, three eyes, one for each, and instead of paws, they only have needles at all, but they sting with a soldering iron built into the belly, and inside that soldering iron is raisin syrup. As soon as the skin comes off the meat, two paws take salt out of the bag and sprinkle it on the wound. afraid of bees, chapalakh will be punched in the face! And the bees are unusual, they have three heads, three eyes, one for each, and instead of paws, they only have needles at all, but they sting with a soldering iron built into the belly, and inside that soldering iron is raisin syrup. As soon as the skin comes off the meat, two paws take salt out of the bag and sprinkle it on the wound.

And there, a pot-bellied, huge, contented and serious rye bread with baguettes instead of legs, and chocolate instead of eyes, entered the management house, dragged on a lollipop stick, spit out a bubble for a long time, it flew, grabbed onto the glass of the building, burst, on crow-like flies flew in from him, licked the sugar with their proboscises and flew back. But a snail is crawling... here a separate pedestrian crossing with separate types of cars was created for them. Snails sit on those cars, whose cars are only one centimeter faster than the snails themselves, but how much adrenaline they get, their friends even hold on tighter to the seats, afraid to fly away from such a strong wind in their faces. And traffic lights burn sixteen minutes red for cars, twenty minutes for pedestrian snails rushing with suitcases to work, to the post office. There, the snails come off in full.

In the city, at least at number seven on Vrungel Street, lives Apollo, the patron of the arts, the patron of muses and inspiration, a healer and the like, and a predictor of the future, to whom they go to ask what sock they should wear today on vacation , and what will the weather be like tomorrow and is it worth carrying an umbrella from the rains from sea urchins in your backpack. Apollo always answers honestly, once, whether on the way, or it was destined to be, the door to the god’s apartment opened, and he, Apollo, immediately shouted to the incoming:

- Will!

- Right?

Do I see the future or do you?

So, God-Apollo predicted that tomorrow would definitely be a day. Whether everyone dies or not. There is always a day.

Watching how disabled people approached the house of God, then happy ones left, the skunk realized that after all there is a miracle and disability is not a reason to worry. So, the one-legged man went out without legs, and the deaf man ran away, holding a funnel for his ears, and it was so destined for the blind man that Apollo sewed LED lamps around his eye in order to see. If it's dark, then light is needed. That bear didn't see, and now he sees the light. Joy, joy, joy!

And on the moon ... why haven't you seen this before, there are worms! They captured her. And we did not know that this is the pupil of the galactic alliance of rats killed in battle, a man from another, giant planet like Betelgeuse.

“You shouldn’t…” the husband would have said if the skunk was definitely watching, but she heard about it from the lips of other wives, “It wasn’t enough for you to have your own opinion.

And here her opinion is hers, we don’t have the slightest idea, but it sounded frightening, as if her husband considered her some kind of dumbass that she couldn’t put a round ball into a round hole, but you throw a round one into a square one. Here's the laugh.

The husband threw a sheet over the mirror, hung on that sheet the drawing that he drew, the drawing of his wife, she came up and began to admire herself. How could she know what she looked like, because a stick and four separate sticks around that one, and round cheeks of orange orange near a round head, it seemed to her very well. She loves citrus a lot. She had no idea that a mirror could even, actually mimic the movements of a human or a skunk, which would do just fine, and so amazing, bombastic and just fantastic. She is the ideal of beauty and only a god is more beautiful than her, because, something, but she knows that the gods can make themselves a more ideal body, and their face is a thousand times more pleasant.

We flew on ... this story stinks too much and is full of verbosity to the ceiling.

On the roof of the house of different buildings, raindrops gather and commit suicide, so it rains on the ground, and they plop down on the ground and scatter. And in another part of the city, pigeons gather in the sky and click seeds, because in all cities you can see the husk from them. Isn't it amazing how the droplets cross themselves, pray to God, worry, then fall on the asphalt, soon fly away into the sky becoming a steam, these are their souls to be reborn and jump from an even higher place - they have dreamed for so long about getting into to the gods that live in the clouds, to see with their own eyes the world they live in, finally to see the continents and cities where they will never be.

The world is a magical world, an amazing world...

In one city in a country called "nowhere" and "once" lived people who touched each other and shared the time of their lives, then gave birth to children, and children shared their lives with them, so, until the time when it was already there was no time to share among all his relatives. They were dying at the age of three hundred, maybe four hundred, young, but living in the last days. All of them seemed to be of the same age, in appearance you could not distinguish them from brothers and sisters.

Tell me, after all, no one on earth thought about the fact that we are walking through some kind of galaxy, literally, and they are located under our feet, and the inhabitants of those galaxies are plants that could overcome gravity, create a ship that represented from the stem of a plant. That is, when the plant grew, it was the engineers of that world who built them up to find even more amazing worlds. So, for example, in three months, those builders built huge corn fields, stitching it with their universe. Tiny inconspicuous people live in these plants, for whom time passes so slowly that we have one day, for them a hundred years. So, for example, they managed to rebuild everything, and, of course, they lived longer than you and me, relative to their world. In three months they were three hundred years old, maybe three thousand, and we were dying at thirty and ninety. They watched us from the stems with binoculars and wondered how amazing the world is. And our eye froze on their stem, whole generations passed, people began to worship that eye, because it has always been here, from their birth and the birth of their grandfathers and great-grandfathers. But look ... a nuclear war began, this is why the plants rotted and dried out, because the war destroyed everything. It broke up, and those who survived created capsules before finally falling to the ground, and flew away with the wind to other places to start life from the very beginning and start building new stems of plants, roses, lilies of the valley, trees, reeds. Grains, these are those spaceships with plant inhabitants that managed to escape. Generation after generation is repeated all over again. people began to worship that eye, because it was always there, from their birth and the birth of their grandfathers and great-grandfathers. But look ... a nuclear war began, this is why the plants rotted and dried out, because the war destroyed everything. It broke up, and those who survived created capsules before finally falling to the ground, and flew away with the wind to other places to start life from the very beginning and start building new stems of plants, roses, lilies of the valley, trees, reeds. Grains, these are those spaceships with plant inhabitants that managed to escape. Generation after generation is repeated all over again. people began to worship that eye, because it was always there, from their birth and the birth of their grandfathers and great-grandfathers. But look ... a nuclear war began, this is why the plants rotted and dried out, because the war destroyed everything. It broke up, and those who survived created capsules before finally falling to the ground, and flew away with the wind to other places to start life from the very beginning and start building new stems of plants, roses, lilies of the valley, trees, reeds. Grains, these are those spaceships with plant inhabitants that managed to escape. Generation after generation is repeated all over again. how to finally fall to the ground, and flew away with the wind to other places to start life from the very beginning and start building new stems of plants, roses, lilies of the valley, trees, reeds. Grains, these are those spaceships with plant inhabitants that managed to escape. Generation after generation is repeated all over again. how to finally fall to the ground, and flew away with the wind to other places to start life from the very beginning and start building new stems of plants, roses, lilies of the valley, trees, reeds. Grains, these are those spaceships with plant inhabitants that managed to escape. Generation after generation is repeated all over again.

While we were dreaming about those ... someone knocked on our door when we were dipping crackers in hot tea with milk, getting up and opening the door we saw him, all shaggy, tired, dirty. He drew himself up, gasped, smiled, and then began to cry. Some old man, small, the size of a five-year-old kid, combed his hair with his fingers, and hugged his knees, yelled at the top of his voice, then let go, became malicious, like a chainsaw when sawing a tree, and began to beat us:

You left me there! I've been looking for you for twenty years!

- And who are you?

- Your brownie! Life has made me a man, some kind of homeless... I... I have been looking for you all these years to protect you from evil, from all sorts of demons and devils that sit on your refrigerator, which you don’t even notice, and they do evil behind your backs , that's why you swear!

"How do you know we're arguing?"

- Friendly, not silent. When there is a knock on the door, they gather nearby and raise their heads to find out who has come! I see…” he stretched out his head, “none of you dislike each other. All this because of the fat demon that sits on your shoulders! - He pulled out a stick from somewhere, hit it on the shoulder, and something roared past the ear, some kind of wind, a draft. At first we thought we forgot to close the balcony, and then the brownie grabbed him and kicked him out of our house. By some miracle, the elevator itself arrived on the floor, the door opened and the elevator went down. Soon, on the floor we saw tiny, flat, wide footprints, and two hooves followed him. No doubt it was a demon. But it turned out that this was only half the trouble, in the kitchen there were forty of the same, fat, smelly and with crooked teeth, they covered all the happiness with their bodies, stinking of stench and bitterness, anger and sadness. Smell that smell

— Come on! yelled the Brownie, flew into our kitchen, beat everyone, “Over these twenty years,” he said, “I learned to stand up for myself, studied a hundred martial arts, lived in churches and mosques, studied Satanism and the exorcism of demons, “And those and could not do anything, rolled on the floor and, like a billiard ball, following each other, created a powerful hurricane at home, and disappeared behind the door. The sun appeared behind the clouds, it became warmer.

The neighboring house was next door, not surprising, but only to call it a house did not open his mouth, all kind of scary. In the evenings, the house woke up, took out a huge tower from the ground and left to destroy the giants in the forest. At night, someone screamed furiously, avalanches descended on the mountains, trees broke, animals roared.

And now it's not about magic, when three hippos run with a watering can in their hand to water their son, or about a hawk that flies through the sky, in search of the meaning of its existence, or about those three baboons that dance around the chunga fire - changu, but no, it’s about the fact that there are hypocritical scum among people who strive so hard lately to hurt and show their hostility, but behave as if this is not noticeable in their attitude. They became some kind of crap that treated you well, and then abruptly stopped doing that, why? Because they have starred in the fact that they have achieved something there, and they have achieved absolutely only hostility and shame for them, nothing more. Hypocrisy stinks so much that it's scary to imagine what will happen when they demonstrate it openly, God forbid something happens, and to hell with everything, nothing will happen, you don’t expect anything from such people, they won’t achieve anything, except that they dream of a noble future, but there’s no question of them having any kind of nobility when they treat people like a second sort, to the garbage, what feeds them, what reads them, supports them, has a good dialogue, and they immediately run into aggression on your good, because shit doesn’t go anywhere, no matter how many times you don’t shit, but they eat just as much like shit. A huge rhinoceros on the wings of butterflies will fly in from behind the thicket of the forest, take out a sharp knife, plug them with love, and you see, the shit will flow out, they will die in the throes of happiness, which is so disgusting to them. They considered themselves kind, the most needed, worth something, smiled at everyone until they began to be respected for their thoughts, and then you see, the fans will protect them, because they cleared their brains with their thinking, and fanatics will not even see their painted face, everything is covered in blood, bile, they will run after their idol, who is neither an idol nor a star at all, they will become the same bilious and bad people, they will infect everyone around, how the coronavirus infected the entire population of the planet. No, I have immunity, everyone will say, but in fact they have already been ill and are already carriers of the disease of hypocrisy. What do such people really represent? About those I who smile in your face, but you don’t feel they are doing it for joy, but in order not to disgrace themselves and not become a mockery, not to enter into disputes, laugh it off, put useless smileys, covering up their stupidity. You can always notice such people, they are everywhere, they pretend to be queens and princes, but in fact they are ordinary peasants who remove manure from real, true kings. These nasal devils came from the swamps and are trying to make a swamp out of paradise too, arranging and sticking attention to their person with all sorts of games. The devil will come out from under the pit of the toilet and how he plugs them, and they will be glad that finally, after so much time, their brother came to visit.

Naked Picasso will sit on the moon, take out his weather vane, she will indicate the place where these devils are found, he will not go there, he will drop a nuclear bomb there. A kangaroo will jump higher than the Alpine mountains, stand on its hind legs and crow that yesterday it was beautiful here, today there are people. But what can you do, they are such people, they decide to destroy everything and only build for themselves, so that they feel good, and it doesn’t matter if their words and actions of others hurt, they don’t care about it, it’s good for them, even excellent, because they don’t hurt. And good people will gather around such people, and there have always been more of them than evil, and they will stab those, humiliate them, and hypocritical bastards will take the side of good, again they will begin to lie, pretend to be good in order to be accepted, because without their fans they are an ordinary empty shell, nobody needs a piece of meat. Each of the people always and everywhere looked for support, cried that there were so few of them, Are they doing everything right or not? They have become those who were so laughed at and fought over, those that the whole world laughs at. This narrow world in which they are. At least we noticed with my spiders and pandas those people who got involved in the adventure of friendship and cannot step back, even if their friend is wrong to a greater extent, but to a greater extent, completely wrong. There is nowhere to retreat, you have taken the side of untruth, and if you refuse, you yourself will become a hypocrite and a two-faced bastard, scum that you laughed at with friends. They are afraid to offend those with whom they have made friends, because look, another post will come up about how bad he is, but for years he was good, pretending to be him, went over to the side of evil! Once you stumble once, you are forever an outcast. From which side to look at evil, because evil does not feel that it is dirty, considering himself only right and not accepting any point of view, considering only his own to be the only true one. And someone will come out against them alone, they will gather a big bunch of the crowd, because they themselves can’t cope, attack one, but they can’t prove their case, but what can I say, they don’t understand jokes without any emoticons or brackets at the end of the word, which we have come to, now the presence of some kind of brackets makes a person funny, and the absence of a serious one. Do not let Satan and the world of Satanism, and nine hundred demons behind their backs, so that they see the text without emoticons, you will become a victim of ridicule and persecution. You are the reason for their happiness. Bullying is in their blood. They call you "bitch" and "scoundrel" because they can afford it and no one can stop them, feeling the power on their page, they think that they are completely untouchable, that the fate of Hitler or Stalin does not await them, that they will be respected for their actions, because they have achieved so much in this world, but you didn’t capture Poland and forgot that you are alone against you, but with the support of the whole world, one, on behalf of of all countries and planets, against your bravado of stupidity! You may even think that I think they are, but I don't care what you think of me, I have an opinion about those whom I hate and whom I see every day, their actions and their raison d'être on the platforms. It will even seem to you that I am writing somewhere there, here, where no one will ever look, but what, it is their problem that they read their books ten times, and not the books of those to whom they are subscribed and those who reads them. Why do other people have to adjust in such a way that it is convenient for our ill-wishers? How can you know.

“Enough, my son! - suddenly the head of Jesus appeared from the ceiling, he stretched out his hand with a letter and disappeared, and on that letter was my name, and it was written inside that I knew the existence of the world and learned all the secrets of God's plan. Do not deceive me.

“I knew about this for a long time,” I said, and burned the letter of God, but for some reason it did not burn, then I put it in the toilet, a place for the gods, as I called them from last year. The altar of God, where I wiped myself with it, and it kept getting cleaner and cleaner, because something divine cannot be dirty. And then I realized that God really helps, that's how much savings on toilet paper! And then I took the book of those who offended me and crap them, but for some reason they did not become clean, and this is because it was not divine, there was no smart word, truth, purity, and they did not become clean because of that the shit that stuck to them was cleaner than the book itself, that's why it didn't disappear.

Then, I stopped the play, pulled out the dolls and dusted them, put them back in place and started the timer. They began to play their role as naturally as before, without even realizing that I created them, and I can end their existence at any time. As soon as I open the roof of the theater, everything will freeze, all the puppets will become figures, and their thoughts will be erased, and everything will start anew. So, for example, when they had their own thoughts, I listened to their opinion, then paused, gave the dialogue to my kule opposite, and started again, until all the dialogues were rigged by me, as if in fact they were so thought, and not I implanted the thought in them. How easy it was to fool people. I played games with people, and they played with dolls in dolls, future dolls themselves. It was funny. Why do you think I forgot to create life on other planets, because it's fun here.

This is enough. Toothpicks got up from hibernation and went to the judo section to learn how to properly pull out meat or caraway seeds stuck in the teeth of dolls with one deft movement.

Flying away, in the end I would like to say that the Hulk had never cried before, but when one day he saw people, how weak and defenseless they were, he cried, and flew away with us to the world where a new history of the formation of other magic begins, and how many let's talk about it, let's say it's a science.

So, under the earth of one of the planets, we lived just like us, well, is it not surprising, of course not, nothing surprising, they boiled a kettle on lava, and ate worms, hunting them with fishing rods. And at the other end of the same city, the villain Pavel lived, who built a drilling machine, went to the surface and ate mangoes, potatoes, black grouse, fish, greens, and did not even want to share with any of the underground people. We would say that he is a miser, and it would be true, because he did not know the enormity of his surface and thought that if there were a lot of them, then there would be no food, and it would end. And one day, one caught the “Tremor of the Earth” on the bait, and it pulled him out to the cloudy world, and all the people moved there, and there was no need for any gas masks, because they all died due to the fact that there was a lot of oxygen, and viruses got into their blood. It happens. That's how our people get sick when they get into the underworld and start drilling in places that were never intended for this, places where bacteria have been dormant for millions of years. With one blow of a hammer, they opened the door for viruses in Antarctica, and thousands of such viruses were enough for them to evolve and become a billion, scattered across the oceans and across continents, teaching millions of people how to die in agony.

And you can’t even imagine how hot it gets in the batteries, and why, because when water flows through them, people actually run there and quickly rub the walls of cast iron and metal with their hands to warm up, the faster they do it, the hotter, and the tap water flows hot because it does not have time to cool. And when cold water floats through the pipes, small, incredibly tiny people blow their mouths on them to cool them, then go home. They are so happy when people mix hot and cold, because those who are between the two streams need to work half as much. The scoreboard will light up, you need water, very hot, they rub, and as soon as the “cold” one lights up, they immediately begin to blow into the pipes.

Глава 6

Imagine if our cry, flying far across the earth, overcoming all terrestrial gravity, scattered throughout the cosmos, and began to expand the universe itself - a voice that will never go out and that will push the darkness like a dung beetle ball. As light scatters in the universe, expanding and becoming thinner and thinner, so the voices, becoming waves, push and force the universe to expand. Forever. Eternity is a lot. Who knows how many times the word was said that created our galaxy, crying that the worlds outside our system were drowned, how much joy the trees gave birth to in another space. And how many new worlds were created thanks to our voices that expanded the space of space, giving birth to new planets in the void with their laws radically different from ours. Where clouds suck up dust, leaving water on the surface, where, instead of rains from the waters, pressed sand stones pour in, filling the seas with a beach. How eagles soar into the ground, instead of the sky, and eat not with their mouths, but with their feet. How bears see only through the heat emitted by other animals. How people who were born there rule the whole island - the island of the snail, where its shell is, it's a mountain and continents. Their backs form islands and lands. They float on the waters, absorbing it into themselves and becoming even larger, like some kind of sponge. With the onset of night, a sandstorm occurs, which reduces the oceans around the planet, thereby reducing the snail, taking moisture from it. govern the whole island - the island of a snail, where its shell is, it is a mountain and continents. Their backs form islands and lands. They float on the waters, absorbing it into themselves and becoming even larger, like some kind of sponge. With the onset of night, a sandstorm occurs, which reduces the oceans around the planet, thereby reducing the snail, taking moisture from it. govern the whole island - the island of a snail, where its shell is, it is a mountain and continents. Their backs form islands and lands. They float on the waters, absorbing it into themselves and becoming even larger, like some kind of sponge. With the onset of night, a sandstorm occurs, which reduces the oceans around the planet, thereby reducing the snail, taking moisture from it.

Well, to hell with this universe. He will wander into another, where thirteen wet cutlets are playing squash with live lemons instead of a tennis ball. Where fur seals fall from the roof of houses onto an uninhabited sesame, from where there is no way back - demons grab them from below and take them with them to the world of darkness. When kidnapping, demons do not ask for a ransom. They marry them so that they cook fresh human meat for them at the stake, sprinkled with hot pepper and adjika from crow's feet.

In one of the episodes of the ingenious barthus bill, we threw snow at passers-by with a shovel and they dissolved - the snow was a powerful acid that did not dissolve only the one who threw it - smart snow, programmed to serve the owner. A slave that was once black worked on plantations, then mutated into snowman by eating radioactive snow from outer space - with the power of acid. Despite the fact that Niger-snow has become more powerful than many people, perhaps even stronger than all those living on earth combined, he did not forget his breed, and always kowtowed to white people, serving as before, selectively harvesting from the fields so that the owner always had tea at home. He did not dare to touch the owner's snow, he was afraid. But what are they afraid of, we did not know, because they threw him into the trash with the same nigers, where he fought with them for three days, arguing about the fact that that he is not their slave, but they are all slaves of someone, and they will never be free. Three days of excruciating arguments, and all the Negroes were stuffed into a tin can and sent to stores where they were bought by white people and fed to their cats and dogs.

And somewhere in another world, on a wonderful planet that is far from us, every evening the snake stops at the bus stop and takes people on board to go to the sun in order to warm up. Here on the planet, the sun does not exist, and the light does not reach the surface, lingering on a transparent dome around it, which absorbs all the light. The snake makes seven revolutions around it - the sun, until the clock on its tail begins to vibrate, calling the reptile creature home, to earth. Turning around, the snake touches the moon with its tail, which is carried along with it along the route, breaks the dome, enters it, and night falls on earth. The moon is dark, dark, like the universe itself, painted in the color of hopelessness. After the snake drops joyful people from its back, flies to the moon, wraps it around and warms it with heat, thus releasing heat to the earth, and from time to time glowing, showing the way to wandering wanderers into some dark forest - a path, with light. It is called the guiding snake, the moon, which protects human warmth. At the onset of morning, the snake returns to earth to take earthlings to the sun in order to warm them, give them the vitamin they need, show what a day is. Otherwise, people will not know heat and will commit evil, forever living in ignorance, absorbing artificial light from light bulbs. The snake is huge in itself, the whole globe with its people can fit on it - there will still be room for one planet. How this is possible, the snake itself does not know, but the more it absorbs people, the more it becomes. For example, having swallowed one person, a place for two appears at once, and a hundred people should be swallowed up, a place for three hundred people will appear. Math has never been snakes' forte. It was believed that people did not teach her to fold correctly, because the things in her house were always randomly arranged on the shelves.

People walk near the porthole, and on the back of the snake there is a transparent body, from where sunlight enters, filtering radiation. Radiation light touches all people and animals, gently stroking their velvety arms and legs, the soft bodies of children and wrinkled fingers of old people - that's why they don't get sick from lack of light. Not a single earthling misses this lesson, gathering in a column of wood lice after a wet brick, getting up at a bus stop. Sometimes, it happens that people wave their hands, scream, and it happens that they trample babies, worrying that they will not have time to climb on board the snake, in this case, the snake opens its mouth, swallows everyone at once from the stop, and sweeping across the earth, finds overslept, and then flies away on the route to the star of life. How it works, you can guess. Due to the fact that snakes are cold-blooded, they feel the slightest heat on the surface of the planet, find them and swallow them to take them to the sun - without touching the building. The body of the cosmic serpent is arranged in such a way that it can only swallow living beings. The snake itself is the savior of that land. And when old age comes to the snake ... the moment when you have to say goodbye to it, instead of it comes an elephant from black darkness, from another galaxy, picks up the earth and puts it on its back with its trunk and rushes to the sun, goes around it, plucking space debris, swallowing the heat is sunny, pouring this heat on the earth from all sides, as if washing the places where sunlight cannot reach and returns back. When it comes out from under the dome, a real day comes, sunny - it gets hotter as the sun approaches, people take out tents and benches, towels and blankets in order to have time to sunbathe, photographing the sky with emotion,

Returning back, the heat falls down, begins to disappear, until the elephant reaches the dome, where night falls. It may seem to you that it is cold without the moon, because there is no heat and light, but among other things, the elephant itself emits heat and radiation that departs from it, like the northern lights. In the evening, after the elephant returns the planet to its place, he goes to bed, and while the elephant sleeps, heat rises along the entire perimeter of the planet for its entire length, warming it, drawing light in patterns. Occasionally, but it happens, an elephant wakes up and blows a fountain up with its trunk, waters ... and the dark sky turns into a rainbow color, people call it a cluster of galaxies, when, mixing with the atmosphere, solar energy from the trunk draws multi-colored patterns that burn for a long time, then , slowly disappears, and with the onset of morning, when the patterns have completely dissolved, there is already breakfast time - the best day. Early in the morning people wake up to see the dawn as the elephant walks slowly towards the star - drinking a cup of coffee and tea with a fragrant piece of sandwich with melted butter and jam from raspberries and apples. Closer and closer the sun rises high above the planet until people lower their sunglasses. A little more, they might go blind. Of course, it’s even scary to imagine, but in addition to protecting against radiation, the heat generated inside the snake has healing and regeneration properties. Closer and closer the sun rises high above the planet until people lower their sunglasses. A little more, they might go blind. Of course, it’s even scary to imagine, but in addition to protecting against radiation, the heat generated inside the snake has healing and regeneration properties. Closer and closer the sun rises high above the planet until people lower their sunglasses. A little more, they might go blind. Of course, it’s even scary to imagine, but in addition to protecting against radiation, the heat generated inside the snake has healing and regeneration properties.

A giant stands in the sun and waves a white flag, then he pulls out a whole pile of apples from his pocket and throws it at the elephant's feet. After the elephant eats and spit out the leftovers, a large number of seeds from it accumulate around the sun. Soon, an apple tree grows, and cosmic bees and caterpillars fly to the smell of flowers, which eventually become snakes, and from the bees, when the stomach grows from intercourse with other cosmic bees, tiny elephants that fall near the apple tree eat apples and leaves from the tree and become space giants that go to other worlds to also replace the snakes that left the world of the living.

Then, the stars and planets begin to shrink... the man wipes the sweat from his forehead and looks at the microscope, with such wonder and admiration;

How small is this galaxy. Well, just look, they have their own laws and their own types of animals that they wear on the backs of the planet! It's amazing what doesn't exist in the world.

So, a person learns that he is a god, that he can destroy their world, but at the same time he wants everyone around him to know about him, other people. He begins to write and observe even more often, makes a plan for himself to go to the people who are engaged in his business, to real scientists. And suddenly, then ... so unexpectedly, someone taller than him that sits at the computer, presses the keys and erases his memory. The person who discovered tiny universes under a microscope does not even realize that he is a computer simulation created by another person, that he does not have his own thoughts, and God immediately removes those that are created in his tiny brain by pressing a single “delete” button.

And above it hangs a little girl who was bought a dollhouse, and she put the dolls in the corners, who she threw on the farm, and someone, like this, at the computer desk. Playing with the life of this giant. And he also had no idea that an ordinary toy was in the hands of a little girl, he never turned around and never looked up, he was doomed all his life to watch how someone creates a world in a computer, and there, a new one is created by another, such just like him.

As a child, an old man named Vanya, was old, before it became mainstream, then, in order to keep up with the trends, he turned into a young man, but because of this, he did not become any younger, because he was born a hundred years ago, and he was a hundred years old, and the fact that he changed his appearance gave him only an excuse to marry again. So he found a wife to match himself, and they both grew old in one year, and each died on his own day, wife in Murmansk, husband in Indonesia, somewhere among the bushes, correcting the need - a cobra bit, and then tore wild hyenas. The wife was a scarecrow stuffed into a stocking, to which he attached a photograph of an actress from some series from NTV. That day there was a fire in the field, and Vanya's wife burned down in the agony of pain and torment. But, of course, the scarecrow did not feel pain, which cannot be said about seventeen spiders, forty-two ants, thirteen worms and two cuckoo eggs. Well, and ... uncle Vanya's hidden utility bills, in the next world, when Vanya found out about this, he got very angry and started a fight with devils and angels that he had to return him back so that he would pay for utilities. The angels said until you pay, there is no turning back for you, and so it happened. Vanya still keeps payment receipts and refuses to pay, because he is too lazy to do this, besides, he is a very religious person, they say, a person should not pay for natural wealth at all. So... sometimes, the angel Michael comes down to him in the form of a man and pays utility bills for him so that he is not evicted from his house. Mikhail knows that the granddaughter of this grandfather, about whom he knows nothing, will move into this house, because forty years ago he conceived her in a club when he was drunk, since then the granddaughter that was born to a girl, which he found there, whether it was an ordinary goat, or a human one, lived in a pasture among sheep, tied to a rope. Still, in my opinion, it was a goat that knew seventeen foreign languages, including Hebrew and Latin, and when she cursed in Tatar, everyone immediately ran over the waterfall right to the rainbow. At the top of a mighty rainbow sat Dr. Aibolit, who kicked everyone down and treated them for a small fee. It used to be that this doctor was very kind, but when reading books about him, we didn’t think where he gets the paws for the hare to sew on, and where the eyes for the owl come from. At night, he hunted other animals or paid money to poachers, that they may have injured those bunnies, and these are not really new paws, but old, stolen ones. Mikhail knows that the granddaughter, who moved here, will find collectors in her stairwell in a year, that they hit her so hard that she dies. Previously, the angels were not involved in saving people, but there was not enough space in heaven, so they solved the issue in an easy way, coming to those in need in the form of people whom fate sent them. We often do not notice them and consider them passers-by, but they always rush to help and behave well with us. Each person has his own Angel that erased his memory and keeps him on earth so that he leaves happy, and not exhausted by life, in order to want to return there again. Soon he will return to the planet after rebirth, which awaits all the dead. but they are always quick to help and treat us well. Each person has his own Angel that erased his memory and keeps him on earth so that he leaves happy, and not exhausted by life, in order to want to return there again. Soon he will return to the planet after rebirth, which awaits all the dead. but they are always quick to help and treat us well. Each person has his own Angel that erased his memory and keeps him on earth so that he leaves happy, and not exhausted by life, in order to want to return there again. Soon he will return to the planet after rebirth, which awaits all the dead.

- What will you do when you die?

- I will live.

- But where?

- Wherever I want.

Is there life after death?

Is there no death in life?

If there is a place in the world where I want to go, this place will be something unlike anything that I have known and seen before. That place will be unbearably beautiful, looking at it I will want to cry, wipe my tears and rejoice, I will want to remember every moment. Well, like a moment, the saddest and happiest, but it is impossible to remember each of them, how many of these moments actually exist, countless, on the hump of the dwarf Nose, maybe seventy-nine. Here the sunsets are more beautiful and the trees are greener. And mosquitoes bite with love. A place where peacocks paint pictures with a brush and sell them at auction, where eagles carry small thrushes to warmer climes on their backs, and kangaroos give shelter to all who have lost their homes, sheltering with warmth. You go into the pocket of a kangaroo, and there the cat sits on a rocking chair and reads Tolstoy's book about "Adolescence", laughs licking sour cream from his mustache, and next to it are several more stacks of books by Stephen King, Tolkien and Bradbury. The most real living books that tell about what is happening in their souls, inside, where no one sees anything. Opposite, a fireplace is burning under a hanging shelf, firewood hissing. Fiery people dance there, fry sausages, and goldfish jump out of the rivers along the walls. If you look for a long, long time, you can see that Sauron is there, that the orcs are born along these rivers in order to cook not human meat, but the usual vegetable stew for breakfast. You look and Gandalf will sweep the yellow leaves from the ditches from which the orcs crawled out, and then the gollum will come running and tell a tale that everyone is against him, and everyone is so eager to steal his charm. He himself completely forgot to forget how he bit off his best friend's finger and almost killed him, almost becoming his executioner. They say,

A place where no one will be judged for preferences that are different from those of other people, where being Galileo is not insane at all, but a common occurrence. Where thoughts become reality, where the spoken word is realized in the present. Dreams that are told to Santa Claus come true, and do not disappear in the fireplace stove. Where Santa flies on a sleigh, and the deer really know how to jump on the stars, and are not the inventions of adults to calm crying children. The place where the gnomes that walk on the floor at night, sneaking, hiding, actually exist, and the fairies that take their teeth into the magical world and leave gold coins - there is. The fairies carry off the teeth and make new, good teeth for other little children who need to grow teeth. As soon as the children fall asleep, they visit them and carefully surgically insert them into the places for the tooth.

The place where you want to go will be such that everyone who meets me on the way will be glad to see me, and I will be glad to them. Where each of my decisions will be the common decision of all people. A place where, in order for everyone to feel good, you need to choose not one of the two, but both at once, so that everyone really feels good, and not those who paid the most or those who voted the most. Where every word will be heard, where the world, where I will live, will hear each of us. This place will be special, in particular, in that they will not curse here for evil, but will accept that you are not like everyone else, and also burn out that you are an ordinary person who makes mistakes. A place where people are truly taught, not made into learning machines. Where people understand what they are studying, and not just getting knowledge, so that it is, because society dictates so. Where they love what they do instead of crying on the mother's phone, how tired they are of working. A place where you choose when to work and when to pay your bills, a place where you can basically pay for nothing if you have to. A place where magical people appear exactly at the moment when they are needed. They come to you when it's bad, when you need support, when you want to tell a secret and speak out. They will hug you, cry for the company, and go with you to the carousel, throw plasticine at passers-by, eat cotton candy and swim in the mud after the rain with long, wet worms. when you want to tell a secret and speak out. They will hug you, cry for the company, and go with you to the carousel, throw plasticine at passers-by, eat cotton candy and swim in the mud after the rain with long, wet worms. when you want to tell a secret and speak out. They will hug you, cry for the company, and go with you to the carousel, throw plasticine at passers-by, eat cotton candy and swim in the mud after the rain with long, wet worms.

Where you can climb the highest mountain and not die from freezing. Where on the top of that mountain there is a magical stop, from where every evening a black and white owl flies away, holding a basket with people on it, waving to the beat not only wings, but also eyelashes, which she has grown during her stay in the rain - her eyelashes are strange, grow from the rain. Where to fall from a height is not death, but a new skill that you need in life to know what it's like to fall and know that there is no way out, that everyone feels when it's scary. And there is always a way out. Either your wings will grow, or the wind will pick you up and slowly lower you to the ground, and a mole in a multi-colored cap on your head will come out of the ground and give you ice cream with different flavors, ranging from cream to kiwi and raspberries. The place where you raise your hand, and in a second a huge ferret will come running, varying among the stones and rocks, smiles at countless teeth, you sit down on a chair on his back, and you run towards the warmth. Keep up with the sun, and this is a huge curd circle with the taste of mandarin, beyond the forest. You take a bite and you become warm, and all the sadness in the world will go away, pack your suitcase, spit, curse you, but leave, wiping your snotty noses:

“Damn you all, there is only happiness in you, don’t love us ... well, damn you, lucky ones!”

And they will repair the gates in the yard, until one day you forgive them and let them go home to warm up, or let them eat. When you think about it, of course.

Delicate curd-milk taste will envelop all your receptors, you will forget all the problems. The father will put his hands on your shoulders and say that everything is fine, that he is there and will always be there. That's why he became your mole on your shoulder. Only two pens, tiny, tiny, and two eyes, and a mouth with a nose. Very beautiful. True, sometimes people think that he is a pimple, and crush his head. And then the father becomes a real abomination. Wildebeests spit, camels sweat, and a spider runs to a secluded place so as not to see it and die of shame.

In the evening the moon will come out, she will wink at you, and you will understand that it is time to dance. All night long you will dance and not get tired, because you can’t get tired here either. All this energy gives you even more energy. But if you really wanted to sleep so much, then just one desire is enough and you, like a robot, will fall asleep, collecting the energy of the previous day. In the morning someone will climb your head and block the wires, and you will feel that you are living.

You wake up in the morning, and in the kitchen Anna Akhmatova prepares coffee for you, and Barack Obama, your driver, is sitting in the car in the yard. Your new friend will put porridge on a plate, you will eat, stretch and go towards the new sun, today she tastes like lemon. The real lemon cake. And along the rivers flows a chocolate milkshake with the taste of banana and avocado.

A place where people get sick, but people are not treated, because diseases themselves come out of a person and live their own lives, pick flowers, plow fields, raise children, build houses. An amazing place where people talk to diseases and learn about why they come, what their strength is, and why they do what they do. Of course, of course, they don’t know why, they are just born, and everything around them smells of honey, they start eating a person, because no one has ever taught them what is so wrong and that this is a living person. Diseases are born to hurt. And here they are born to live. Instinct always wins over such fools.

Every day, unicorns run up the waterfall, their footsteps create music, and the splashes of water create a song. Every evening, coyotes gather around the fire and tell each other fairy tales they made up:

“There is a place in the world where people live at enmity with us. That place is disgusting, where people like us are killed. They say there are no tangerine suns, and songs do not pour from waterfalls. People hate each other and create wars. For you, this is a new word, war, but this is a very terrible thing, when everyone is forcibly killed, forced to do what they don’t want to, hide and tremble.

The other coyotes will nod and be horrified. Wives will cry, and children will stutter, clinging to their mothers. But the same moment a fairy will fly in and dispel their sadness and erase all memories. Coyotes will gather near the fire again and invite friends of bears, foxes, hares, skunks and mice and will cook beans, fry sadness with the taste of cutlets.

It's a place where big, red trucks carry paintings of houses, seas, cliffs, and landmarks for those who can't afford to travel. A place where, dreaming of distant worlds, these worlds come to you. There are no borders between seas and mountains, countries and planets. People assemble a vacuum cleaner, then suck the seas into them in just a couple of minutes, and then print a xeroxed picture from the resulting liquid, insert it into a frame and load it into cars, and they leave for other countries and cities. It happens that aliens come from other universes that buy a copy of our world from us and take them away in a container to create the same beauty on their planet. After the paintings have been uploaded, they arrive at the site and are hung in museums so that other people can also admire and touch them. Happens, people go into these paintings, walk there, spend their days, relax, and come back home late at night when the museum closes. On rare occasions, when moving paintings from a truck to a museum, the paintings that are in the bags flounder and mix, and there a new world is created. And sometimes, people build canyons themselves to empty the picture and create a new sea or ocean in that canyon.

On Sunday morning, the giraffe got out of bed and went to work, as befits intelligent animals that value free time. However, this does not affect his rest in any way. Can a job that brings pleasure be bad, of course not. The giraffe knew for sure that today no one would pick the leaves from the tree without him, because the longest among all animals, of course, is only he, and he knows exactly how high the leaves grow and why it is impossible to get them without him. Yes, and the trees here are very dangerous, one has only to touch the bark, sharp, poisonous thorns come out and pierce everyone, which is why the service of the giraffe was underestimated. Gently touching his lips, he tore the leaves and threw them into baskets held by leprechauns, red-capped gnomes and roller-skating tarantulas. Tarantulas helped to roll the basket much easier,

And if you don’t run away so far, some miserable few million kilometers, to the neighboring planet, then you can see not only dragons that light the sun in the morning, with fire from their mouths, but also crocodiles that put them out at night, swallowing and spitting back. They are such that they get their energy from the heat of the suns, thousands of suns all over the universe. Without the dragon, he could not even live, and the dragon, in order not to destroy the nearest worlds, releases heartburn on the extinct sun, making it alive again, unable to live a day without a crocodile.

Having descended on the planet, we see… Small pebbles run on the surface, which cling to their mothers and die, forming a rock, and fish crawl out of the water, standing on their feet to evolve into something new, reasonable. Some of them never evolve and become wood, marble, sculpture. Other inhabitants of the planets come here to examine their remains, all the trees and sculptures, take pictures and draw pictures, in order to then tell their children that certain creatures lived before them that ruled the planet - they will nod and be horrified, how strange, terrible they were, and, perhaps, ferocious, but never knowing that they were their ancestors once crawled out from under the oceans.

Boarding a ship, we fly away from the planet, fly to the edge of the universe, where the earth has just begun to form, but has already stepped over the development of the current earth. And all because of the relativity of time and its flow on the planet, especially at the edge of the universe, where it flows differently than we do in the solar system. Every minute here is a hundred years, no less. Here you look into one house, a man pulls out a hair from his head and sends it to a certain machine, similar to a copier, in order to create his own clone. A few flashes, a screech of metal and a muffled explosion, squeaks ... a child's cry, and through the screen comes out exactly the same person who created him, identical. He thinks the same, does the same, knows the same as the original. The people of the planet are using technology to get to two, three, ten and a hundred places at the same time, not to be late and not to disappoint others. It happens that in order to solve problems they send clones from one side, and clones from the other side. Two clones solve issues and find a compromise. It happens that the device helps to save on money, and instead of hiring workers, they clone themselves and build entire houses, do farming. It happens, of course, on the basis of hostility and war, countless dead clones that rot lying on the ground. It takes only a day for them to soak into the ground, and trees grow in place of the corpses. Hectares of trees are like the hair of the earth, just like the hair on the head of those people. After, in order to recreate the population of humanity on the planet, two opposite earthlings clone themselves and create the same children of clones, in the traditional way, making love. In a few hours, children grow into men and women, begin to work and create new ones, painfully unknown technology. And all due to the fact that, having mixed DNA, those people become new milestones of humanity, with other thoughts and motives, they have more ideas and nerve endings in the brain, their brain works several times faster, and while they are young, generate countless thoughts per second. So, in the first hours of his life, Henry, the one hundred and seventeenth son of that man and woman, built a blaster that could destroy the moon with one single salvo, and another, Henry the fifth, created a device that absorbs sunlight to generate it into atomic energy. And a woman who was born not so beautiful, to be honest, but smart, created an apparatus that can allow humanity to travel the worlds without fear for their lives, her device refracts light and reflects any physical attacks. A comet that hits it simply bounces back into the darkness, into the darkness of space. Once a space bat stumbled upon her, screamed, did not understand what had happened, and began to beat against the void again and again in order to overcome the barrier, but again and again bounced back until she flew over the person from below, realizing that the attempts its really useless. She is just a petty, vile person who has not managed to harm anyone. The bloody, angry, but cowardly bat disappeared into the needle point, first blocking the light of a distant star, then becoming a distant star itself, which was swallowed up by the light of the star. until she flew over a person from below, realizing that her attempts are actually useless. She is just a petty, vile person who has not managed to harm anyone. The bloody, angry, but cowardly bat disappeared into the needle point, first blocking the light of a distant star, then becoming a distant star itself, which was swallowed up by the light of the star. until she flew over a person from below, realizing that her attempts are actually useless. She is just a petty, vile person who has not managed to harm anyone. The bloody, angry, but cowardly bat disappeared into the needle point, first blocking the light of a distant star, then becoming a distant star itself, which was swallowed up by the light of the star.

Our universe could be different from others if the whole universe in all worlds did not have its own mind. If only the planet in the neighborhood did not decide for itself what will grow in it and what should be killed, who should be given a chance to evolve, and who should be harmed and given a chance to be born in a hundred million years. Only the planet itself decided what laws would be in it, whether clouds would fly or swim, whether birds could soar, and animals could run. The planet itself created animals for itself that would be convenient for itself, so that they would help fertilize the earth, carry seeds to other continents, kill insects that harm it, but on the other hand, they are also needed so that those who feed on them can live and benefit to her. The Earth has always thought that it is bad, of course, to kill dinosaurs, but she clearly and clearly understood that if she did not do this, did not destroy them with biological weapons that she herself created in her crust and released to the surface, other types of animals could not have been born - and they were certainly destined to be born, change generations, create a new world. Soon, say the trees in the forest, the earth will begin to kill everyone because of a bad attitude towards it. The planet has always thought that intelligent species of animals will be much better than those who destroyed the earthly creations that it created, but how wrong it was ... many, many times. So, for example, in the time of the dinosaurs, none of those stupid animals could think of somehow ruining the atmosphere, except perhaps with a gentle breeze from the anus, and even then ... it’s not so important, plants fed on them and released oxygen. Many millions of years ahead, the planet breathed truly, with a full chest, if it were,

At this time, the planet is watching people through the eyes of the universe, calculating the worst possible outcome it can imagine. The result that will be at the end of all mankind. So much pollution has not been on it for all four billion years of existence. No one had ever mocked her like that, no one had ever caused so much pain, had not destroyed the atmosphere, had not drunk her blood from the depths, had not drained the oceans. Except perhaps the ash from the volcanic eruptions that covered her, but even then, she was cured. In the future, it will take much more time to be cleansed of humanity. Waste, substances that did not exist in nature, created by us, people. The worst of the best.

The mind was. The universe thought. In each universe lived an even smaller universe, even smaller. And each of them had their own mind. Each world was free to create its own law, to which other, lower beings would obey. They, those who were created by the universe, could not think that they were created by someone, and not think that they were not created by themselves. It was pleasing to the universe to make the thrown ball fly not up, but down, it flew down. As soon as the universe set the formula for iron, that it flies and does not fall, it flew. But as soon as the universe thought again that the knife kills living beings, it killed, and it happened, occasionally, that the universe changed its mind and made it so that some people and animals survived, because it wanted so - games, the biggest weakness universe. She loves to laugh at her creations. She only has to tell herself and all the planets around her to collide with each other and destroy all life, the planets will roll along the canvas of dark matter and crash into each other and the planets will shatter into billions of small parts. But she didn't do that. The universe itself perfectly understood that the laws of pain it created also acted against it, and she did not like when it hurt, when children hurt her, when things that were created to save and help destroyed everything around. So many little things to control some little people, so tiny molecules, so many laws so that they do not break, a living hell. Only one thing pleased the universe - unlike them, time did not flow for her, for her she simply did not exist, she was the weakness of the living, and she did not live, but only was, they thought about her, they knew about her, no more than what her strength was and what she could do. She was immortal and it was only necessary to wait for people to destroy themselves and disappear. Soon, new cities will grow in their place and new rivers will flow through the canyons, the deserts will be filled with the ocean, and thousands of new species will emerge from the waters onto land, which will become even better than the previous ones.

But this time the universe wanted not as before. She didn't want iron to be solid and lay on the ground, and birds to fly and have wings, and animals to be stupid and unable to interact with people in any way. The planet on which life originated had to have a unique appearance, which was not found anywhere else in the universe, in it, and in others that ruled it. The higher the universe was in the hierarchy, the more powers it had. Ours thought:

I will create water, but only solid water, where only a person can climb, but not animals, so that people can breathe under water, and animals cannot chase them to kill them. And I will create trees in such a way that at night they crawl underground and sleep, and early in the morning, when the sun begins to warm the earth, they grow again and chirp. And I will make the stones into buses. And the wolves will be the drivers on the rocks. And the worms will get entangled in each other and create a sweater and mittens. In winter, they will be covered with wool, and in summer the wool will fall off, and wings will grow in their place, which will help those who wear them fly. No more than two meters above ground level. The spoon that people will create will not be hard, and will not hit the teeth and hurt, but will take on the most pleasant kind of material that the mouth will take into itself. That is, when there is not enough salt in the food, the spoon itself salts the food, how good the person will be. If a person wants sugar in tea, he does not have to buy sugar separately, he only needs to buy a spoon that will replace all the spices and sweets. I licked the spoon, and it tasted like strawberry jam, then honey and fried potatoes. It happens that you didn’t want to eat beans, put them on a spoon, the spoon changes its properties, it looks like beans, but it tastes like ordinary fried potatoes with ghee. The monkey will be the banana seller, and the whales will be selling caviar. Mountains will move across the continents and bask in the sun, changing the landscape. Turtles will build the road, and cuttlefish will make markings for cars. The crocodile will be able to fly higher than the eagles, and the eagle will be able to swim under water and catch seahorses, for the winter, to ride them on the ice, putting it on its paws. Instead of raining on the earth, the clouds will fall to the ground, will find grooves and reservoirs and dissolve in them, leaving instead of themselves water, commensurate with its volume. In the morning, mind you, there is fog, these are clouds looking for a way to the place of sleep.

Elephants will read a fairy tale to human children, holding a book in their paws, and twisting a pointer in their trunk, drawing pictures in the air for them, which are visualized into holograms and portraits. They will straighten the rim of the glasses with their trunk and smile, get up, take the children with them, they will climb on his back, and they will run across the savannah, the teacher elephant will show nature and tell how everything works. They will come to a wolf or a cheetah, and he will tell them how he lives and what he hunts, what to eat and where he sleeps. Children, of course, will be horrified, but they will understand, because they know that food appears on their table for a reason. Some species are at enmity among themselves, as they are destined by the will of the universe, but few of them are friends, concluding truce sheets. These sheets make it possible to think, to think, to become human, to know being, to learn to read, write and understand everyone around. Is it true, It is quite difficult to convince predators, especially when you tell them that they will have to eat only beans and corn from the fields. And they, as you know, do not like vegetables, but only meat. They enjoy when the victim runs away, the whole pleasure, to see how the mouth overtakes the food. This is how it should be in the world that the universe has created. She can create laws, events, but not their thoughts. They form themselves and live their own lives.

And if someone dies, he is reborn into a person, if he was an animal before, in order to have a choice in the future who they become. Here, souls do not fly away anywhere, everyone has atoms in their bodies, all worlds and universes are created in its likeness, from small particles tightly fastened together, forming either a snake, or a brick, or a cable from a computer, one has only to change the sequence of atoms. So, for example, when an animal is eaten and killed, their atoms will fly far, far away, get used to the bodies of those who desire children, form babies in them, and soon they will come into the world. One can become a lion, another a tree, a third even a lily. They will live all their lives until they themselves die or are killed, they die, and everything repeats itself, but in a different way, becoming a different species. Next time... the boar will become a hare. Or the hare will become a blueberry, and he will definitely know what it means to be eaten. He will understand what it was like for those he ate. Perhaps in the next life he will change his mind, but as practice shows, no one changes. A predator is always a predator, a killer always kills.

If one day the universe wanted to change this too… then, for sure, everything would not go according to the plan that it had prepared. If she gives up her will, she loses her power. But what kind of power are we talking about, if the smaller universe is stronger, only the universe that holds the tiny one in itself and controls it. A variant of events is possible that the universe did not itself create elephants, but opened thoughts of a higher one in the hierarchy.

So, for example, a cup on the table of a guy from Brooklyn has the ability to absorb people, as soon as they touch and sip it, they are absorbed into them and fall into endless black darkness. There is no light here. This is a world forgotten by the universe, which it has not yet had time to create or destroy, rather, create. From generation to generation, from one garage kiosk to another garage sale, a cup roams, absorbing everything around. Grabbing the handle and then hitting the top of the object, she disappears, and the object is in the void. This is how a new world is created, and only those who are in that dimension are able to truly decide for themselves what will be arranged and how. They will want to put the sofa in the very corner of the universe, they will, they will want to decorate the white walls with red paint and two deer heads, they will decorate. The universe, running, forgot about that world, creating, forgot what worlds it has, and where is this or that force separated from it. What if this is the same new universe that lurks in every larger universe, but smaller? Maybe the universe is that dimension, only the size of a cup, but capable of sucking everything around and making things out of them in proportion to itself. Less than the atoms themselves. Of course, each universe is higher than the other, but what a surprise that not all of them remember that they rule something else besides their visible universes and dimensions. Apparently, the laws there are the same as here, only they are not capable of influencing a higher power from the outside. but capable of sucking everything around and making things out of them in proportion to itself. Less than the atoms themselves. Of course, each universe is higher than the other, but what a surprise that not all of them remember that they rule something else besides their visible universes and dimensions. Apparently, the laws there are the same as here, only they are not capable of influencing a higher power from the outside. but capable of sucking everything around and making things out of them in proportion to itself. Less than the atoms themselves. Of course, each universe is higher than the other, but what a surprise that not all of them remember that they rule something else besides their visible universes and dimensions. Apparently, the laws there are the same as here, only they are not capable of influencing a higher power from the outside.

So, the cup got into one village, from where the monkeys stole it, played with them, after that, those monkeys and gibbons, and every other tribe of mammals warring among themselves, found a people called themselves Maya, and sent all of them to that universe, one by one . Leaving only buildings. And then... one day, hitting the mirror with the top of the cup caused the cup to absorb itself and disappear by bouncing off of her. The universe and all memory of them disappeared, they were erased from history. Only artifacts remain. Perhaps they were not Maya at all, but some other people, Greyap or Nrpvyd. The letters written by him were understandable only to the inhabitants of the city, but the people who found the parchments came up with a language that supposedly belonged to them, and were forced to deceive the whole world, creating a story that never happened.

The universe always thought that it was doing everything right, how it would be more convenient for those whom it created to live, but each time it understood that this did not lead to anything good and people always went against it, trying to understand its motives, calling on its conscience, calling damned world, hell. But each universe has its own paradise, which must be created by the person himself, and not ask for what they want. The universe has come to the conclusion that humans are its worst creation, that no third leg or wings, no huge feet and great intelligence can give them what they want. The more she gave them freedom, the more they asked for freedom, more and more. But the fact was that they limited their freedom to themselves, having everything at hand to realize themselves, to imagine, construct, create, create. People found thousands of reasons to blame their failures on the universe,

The universe was silent. Lanterns on the ground lit up, small dust particles rushed up, and each of them was a planet. In the light, they were visible, like ordinary dust, they flew into the clouds, disappeared, then rose even higher, traveled thousands of light years to absorb matter, energy, spin other dust particles around their axis, from the smallest to larger and larger, meteorites , asteroids, debris, until they became huge planets, new ones that people will soon discover through telescopes and give them a new name. But they will never even guess that this is part of their land. A new earth, which will soon become habitable not only for bacteria, but also for people who will be able to overcome the border of their galaxy. Jump boundaries. Yes, people are also bacteria, but, however, unlike us humans, bacteria are more tenacious.

Soon people themselves will become bacteria, they will die, their atoms will be rearranged into something unique and magical, a stool leg or a dog's head on a gate, a finger on a mongoose's paw, or perhaps a drop in the eye of a fish. However, the universe itself can become anyone and at any time, watch everyone, people, the gods that people have come up with, the ants that fight for a piece of sugar. Become the one who fears and studies, in order to know for yourself what it's like to truly live, and what it's like to feel that time is running out. What does it mean to get old.

And again the day came, as it came yesterday and the day before yesterday. These days come every time. And only the father, who went out for sour cream, never returned. He did not come home and did not knock on the window. A little more, and collectors could come and take everything in debt to pay for the apartment, including my white socks for forty-two rubles. Father - he never loved us, said that he did not want to give birth to me, that a caesarean section on his stomach brings him discomfort. Every time he pushed, trying to defecate, it seemed to him that I was coming out, tearing it into small pieces. Of course, I was smarter than my father, I didn’t want to get smeared in shit, kirieshki, dumplings and a couple of cloves of garlic, therefore I decided to design a door and get out of there, see the world, dance on a striptease table along with wild Dingo dogs, drive cars with Gremlins eat fried chicken with ketchup, lick your ass with your fingers on your hand and fly to a neighboring planet to my friend Alfred, who lived in my dimension before he was born and told all sorts of tales about his parents. They say they ... but that's another story, somehow later. I stayed there for several hours until my father came to his senses, barely opening his eyes stuck together, and scratched his stomach at that very moment, at that very damn moment, as soon as I disappeared behind her, forever and irrevocably, of course, before birth. No one told the stupid father that we children pretend to be dumb, but in fact we understand everything, we know everything, and we adopted the experience from DNA a long time ago, and are not a damn thing stupid, like my father, who was born from the mating of an old torn overshoe and two drunken caterpillars at a virgins party. Whether he knew me before he thought of me, of course, of course, is not clear, but I knew one thing for sure, that other people understood more than my father. Thinking was not his credo, the creed was not familiar to his father, because he was born in the nineties, and the film came out long before him.

One day, a few weeks after I was forty-two, we went to see him. We lit a cigar - me and my shadow. After dragging on disgustingly, squinting in disgust, they looked at him, spat at his feet (the saliva suddenly braked sharply, swirled and flew to the leg and froze), and said:

“You know, I always knew you were the cancer of my life. I have always lived well, before I was born. I have never known a worse day in my life than a birth. We lived, - having dragged on, - in principle, well, we didn’t touch anyone, watched cable TV, played games on the computer, had fun in a twister, and then something began to pull us back, all the games became farther and farther, we could not reach for your favorite things. Around me... and of course, around my shadow, a disgusting, stinking tumor began to form, big, big, like a whole freight train. In some strange way, he began to fall first in one side, then in the other, destroying our houses of cards, and dominoes, laid out along the edges of the table. Then… the pain enveloped us, and we saw a light, so terrible, it smelled of death… really, it was death, we thought then. Then they saw how the hand of a woman reaches out to us, smiling with all her rotten teeth, kissing, licking the saliva on our faces. And we cried. Coronavirus! But the words could not be uttered, no matter how much we tried, but we knew how to speak. What nonsense? Do languages always change after death? And we realized that we were speaking a different language only after instead of giving us a cutlet, which we had been asking for a whole hour, they put a nipple in us, forced us to drink milk in a bottle, which I could not stand. There was no other choice, I didn’t want to feel pain, pain in the lower chest, like you called them “belly”, what a strange word. I needed to learn how to talk with my shadow again, to forget the language of the dead, the unborn, in order to simply be part of a society that disgusted me and become one of those pillars of people incomprehensible to me. Living by the rules of people I didn't like. They screamed and complained all the time, yelled at me that I didn’t understand, but I really didn’t understand, I just studied. One thing reassured me that the tumor had lagged behind me. You, dad, lagged behind me, and glory to Archimedes, with whom I played Cossack robbers. And thank Hercules for teaching me to stand up for myself and for Hades, for showing me what it means to feel pain. Glory to all these people that you, father, disappeared from my life. It was difficult to negotiate with Hades. The card debt, of course, was important, but by forgiving them to him, he complied with my request. who taught me to stand up for myself and for Hades, who showed me what it means to feel pain. Glory to all these people that you, father, disappeared from my life. It was difficult to negotiate with Hades. The card debt, of course, was important, but by forgiving them to him, he complied with my request. who taught me to stand up for myself and for Hades, who showed me what it means to feel pain. Glory to all these people that you, father, disappeared from my life. It was difficult to negotiate with Hades. The card debt, of course, was important, but by forgiving them to him, he complied with my request.

The sour mine of my father looked at us and was silent, leaves flew from the ground in the wind, the tombstone leaned on its side and droplets crawled over the eyes of the photograph, probably soon it will rain. Which was true, and it began to rain, my shadow immediately ran into me, and I ran under a tree. The cemetery was filled with sadness.

While he was standing under a tree, far outside the city, a few hours before the end of the world, Frank, a guy of twenty years old, raced along the road (although what difference does it make how old he was, if he were just as younger or older, he would have raced with the same success and perseverance) to warn all inhabitants of the impending end. What was strange was not that he was faster than sound, but the way he moved. Instead of legs, as it should be, when you talk about the fact that he is racing, there were wheels. Frank was created in the laboratory, from where he was released, in order to have time to warn all the inhabitants of the nearest cities that a nuclear-viral catastrophe will soon happen, accompanied by a sharp push of the continents - an earthquake. For many years in a row, terrible things were created in those laboratories, pumped them not only into people and animals, but also into the earth itself. For several years of experiments, the earth answered them, mutated into a virus, filled the voids underground. Soon there will be an explosion and displacement of the layers. Such a gap happened in the mountains, where the virus spilled out of the volcano created the living dead. In fact, they were not truly alive, but the bacteria that moved into the bodies of those dead moved them, and it seemed that they were alive. It happened that when moving in the body, bacteria, not knowing the purpose of the language, moved it and random words flew out that made no sense at all. The only thing the bacteria wanted to do was to take over as many bodies, lands and plants as possible. They devoured the bodies, digesting them, creating goo and meat from skins and organs, flowing in circles, being processed over and over again, leaving only bones to move along the earth. The more they ate, the faster they grew and multiplied. One single bacteria that got on clothes or flown downwind to neighboring countries and islands, within a few years could grow to the very size of the island. One such bacteria created two of its kind, and two of four, and eight of sixteen. What was terrible was not how quickly they devoured the bodies, but the fact that there was no antidote, no antiviral substances. People might have thought that a single bacterium on their skin would do nothing until years later when they discovered a leg would fall off in the morning or an eye would bleed out. Or a one-legged barefoot boy will not come running into the room, holding his mother's head. there were no antivirals. People might have thought that a single bacterium on their skin would do nothing until years later when they discovered a leg would fall off in the morning or an eye would bleed out. Or a one-legged barefoot boy will not come running into the room, holding his mother's head. there were no antivirals. People might have thought that a single bacterium on their skin would do nothing until years later when they discovered a leg would fall off in the morning or an eye would bleed out. Or a one-legged barefoot boy will not come running into the room, holding his mother's head.

And again we thought with my shadow that my father would rise again and begin to run after us in order to become our tumor again. But we could negotiate with bacteria by offering them the technology that Da Vinci came up with while we were in another dimension. A device that can create an infinite amount of food, and absorb an infinite amount of dark matter. It could hardly be called a breakthrough, but for things like the end of the world, it was quite suitable. It could be adjusted to certain matter, for example, to absorb only a species of these bacteria, or only iron. Therefore, any bacterium that could fly away with the wind returned to its place, as if magnetized, in order to disappear into the black hole of the device. Sometimes in the sky you can see how the stars go out, this is a bacterium released into space that devours the planet.

At the end of the story, the bacterium gained intelligence, was able to learn to speak, and found those who sent it to another universe. Alas, having found a home, the Silver Surfer and Doctor Strange stopped her, forcing her to return to another universe where there is not a single soul. So that it will absorb an eternity a pulsating star, which will burn for many more billions of years.

That day... I was forty-three when the bacterium came back. Technologies have developed, and the bacterium itself was some kind of dust, an aerosol spray that could be destroyed, like some kind of cockroach. Taking out the can, I dispelled it forever. She cringed and became a ball with which my cat plays in the apartment. The cat sneezes, he likes it.

A huge green dragon rushed across the impassability. His wings beat against the clouds and white and fluffy seals poured from there, right on his back. Then they immediately grew into tigers and fled into the jungle. Joyful penguins were jumping up and down the trees in the Jungle, and monkeys fluttered above them, waving their huge red wings. Seeing the dragon, they began to laugh at his short legs. The dragon did not like this, and the dragon took off, flapped its wings and erased the jungle under a stone, as if sweeping the dust in the yard, into a small ball of wool, into a ball. All the creatures of the world lived in that ball. The ball was a planet, at least no smaller than Jupiter, if one could compare, of course. The dragon took the ball in its mouth and flew into the sky, so many seals then fell to the ground, but the dragon did not stop and flew into space.

He flew in space for a week, at least, and flew to the void of Bootes, where he threw the ball. The planet has found a new home, the sun is millions of kilometers away, it shines so that life does not die, and a huge stone - the moon - hovers above the ball. An old woman sits on that moon and washes clothes, dries them on a line in the yard and bakes delicious pancakes. She throws pancakes into space, and they turn into rays and fly away to other worlds. Flying to those worlds, stingrays give birth to a small seed - an old woman hatches from that seed, builds a house, takes a frying pan from the pocket of a nightgown and bakes pancakes. The circle of life. Time after time, until the end of time. And every woman thinks that they are gods, and all life has come from them. And no one knows which of them is the first.

And on another planet, at least a thousand light-years away from those places, there are eternal birds.

Light flies to the earth for eight minutes, and to that planet a thousand years, while having a speed of three hundred thousand kilometers per second. That's how far that place was from our sun, and how far from the planet of rays. That planet, the spiral, only birds live in it, and several million ... but everything is in order. Their life is a cycle along the same route, towards the sun, which birds see through the thin shell of the planet. Their dream is to someday fly to the sun and relax. Alas, the wind flow on the planet does not allow the birds to sit down, and the spiral does not allow them to fly out of their world. Trying to fly higher, the spiral adjusts to them, leaving exactly the same amount of space as before, from below, from above. They are forced to fly in circles all their lives and sleep in the air, raise chicks, and eat. Food, it's small dust-sized shrimp and the plankton that fly with them. They fly into their beaks, into their feathers, and through layers of down and into their pores. Leaving the energy of the sun there, they fly back just as they flew in. Without death. Again collect the energy of the sun in order to give them to the birds that will fly over the entire spiral world and return back. That is why the birds do not get tired of flying endlessly in a circle. Sometimes clouds chase birds, also trying to reach the sun, alas, they just can’t catch up. It seems that there is even a small ocean under them, and water birds live in that ocean, they emerge from under the water, get burned by the light of the sun and disappear into the depths to heal their wounds. And when the time comes for the flying birds to die, their ashes turn into shrimp. And the death of shrimp creates new birds in the ocean. And the death of ocean birds leads to the formation of souls - liberated from the water world, — that become flying birds. Should we understand the laws of those worlds and argue with them? We do not argue that such a thing exists.

But what was most ridiculous about the neighboring planet of squares and equations was why Pushkin played cricket instead of helping Archimedes solve his problems for first-graders of vampire students at night. While the coffins are closed, Archimedes worked all day.

Pushkin looked at all this with some distrust, grimacing all the time and telling Archimedes that vampires do not need any equations. To which Archimedes replied:

“But how will they know how much blood they have drunk and what time the sun rises?” This is a vital teaching!

“I wish you knew how to play cricket too, than talk about meaningless numbers!”

- In every sense there are numbers, numbers and there is the meaning of our existence. Take a look. We know what grade our children are in, and how old they are and how much is left. We know the value of time. It's all calculated in numbers and figures, you don't know anything, Comrade Pushkin!

- It's right. But how will it help me become immortal? And how does it help you win in cricket?

When you help me, I'll explain everything. Soon we will create a castle with a time machine, and a chamber for curing the death of cells in the body. When we achieve all this, we will become immortal.

"That's not what you're arguing about, gentlemen. All head, head. Your souls are dead. You don't think about this or anything. You need to think about women wiyah. If you don't take them into account, they won't give you any immortality. Vampires and witches, that's what they are, - said Gogol, sighed and pulled out a picture of a lady. The lady immediately began to shout:

"You fools don't think about the future!" Instead of working, you are idle, you don’t help around the house, but I’m all of you ...

A hatch opened in the floor, smoke rose, and Tolstoy jumped out:

"Shut your mouth, Karenina!" - and put the card into the deck and threw it into the furnace. He scratched his beard and continued, “Never, you hear, never mess with women! And do not take aboard your ships, they will sink!

“Judge correctly, Mr. Tolstoy. There is no use from them, but scoop the ocean with a spoon!

Night soon came. The children climbed out of the coffins, jumped on the teachers and drank their blood.

“Better they drink our blood than women drink blood.

But where did vampires come from and where are their parents? There were no parents. And it was all the fault...

“Children, everyone is in their places!” - the window opened, and with a whistle, with a storm, Dr. Frankenstein flew into the room, - The lesson begins!

Yes, holy father! the children shouted in chorus and sat down at their desks.

The children sat down. Their eyes sparkled with greed. Archimedes closed the book and got up from the table and went to the blackboard.

- And so, go out one at a time, we will teach you how to measure numbers. That is, to know how much blood you need when you become adults, you survive.

And what happened next, no one knows, but there was a lot of dust in the room that day. Open windows, wind through the room.

In the galactic universe, which has no name, where not everything is as described, and not everything is as it looks, there is a door of magic. Whoever enters the door turns into a matchbox, into a crane, into a daffodil, into a cart, or an eagle with seven legs, and out becomes someone else, entangled with those who entered. Having opened the exit or the entrance, it doesn’t matter at all - the door itself determines which side is the entrance, and which one is the exit, the once former people become not themselves, but something like a cockroach, because the door identified them as people, in a colander, into a bean pod, and some into dust. Aliens live in that dust, even less dust a billion times - they build ships, travel to the seas, study the universe around them - the world in which they fly, among the same dust particles and microbes as themselves. They create science, study the laws of physics, write books, bring up children. Alas, they cannot know that they are just what asthmatics choke on. Sometime in the future, they will fly through time on the wind and fly in through the door of magic and become turkeys, or maybe a sprouted weed near the exit, and find out that the universe is larger than they thought.

That side of the door changes all the time, becoming either mountainous and smooth, with a thousand rocks, from where living-stones that were once people and animals slide down, and it happens that a void forms there - many amazing creatures live in that void. The door cannot know what the laws of the universes are from where the creatures came from, therefore it molds its own laws from them, builds their bodies, abilities and determines who, what and who to be. So, a small worm that accidentally got into the universe can become an animal with an eagle's head, a bull's body, and a peacock's tail, and a cheetah's running speed, while being able to swim and glow in the dark. And he sometimes has a bag, for posterity, like a kangaroo. And instead of giving birth to their own kind, a snake, a lily of the valley or a ballpoint pen with grasshopper legs can grow in a bag in order to jump free. The universe does not know how to collect everything that comes in,

No one knows where this door came from, it has always been there. And during the Second World War, and during the time when Michelangelo's father and mother conceived the artist, and during the Spanish plague, and even during the time when cavemen lived in cold, snowy mountains and slept on ice stones, the door stood right here , in a clearing, in the wasteland, all alone. Neither fire, nor wind, nor a flood, nor an atomic bomb could leave a trace on it, cracks, dents and chips, and a person who tried to move or destroy the door, brandishing an ax, disappeared. And soon a new rose or cactus grew between the trodden path and the door. Maybe sometime in the future, those people who evolved beyond sentient beings were able to send that door to the past to form the future that we know. To make the future the way we remember it now.

The future is like water. Getting into the past and changing it, we do not change our future at all, otherwise we would not have got into the past as we were - we were already created that way, due to the influence of the past on us. And the fact that we sent something to the past, it was prescribed by the future, the present, and in the past it was exactly the way it should be. If everything were different, we would not fall into the past, would not exist in the future - we ourselves created ourselves, the environment, the world and the universe itself. It is amazing that the viper that beats the drums, the boar that dances the cockaracha, and that octopus that teaches small carps arithmetic understand this. Imagine that, having got to the time when Hitler was bombing England, you killed the Fuhrer, but you did not change the future at all, you returned to one of the threads of the future, where he was not, or where he was killed. But Hitler would have been killed anyway. But, apparently, nothing happened to you, because if you had killed that one, you would not have returned for him - the future would have been for you without Hitler. Without the lives he killed, children and dogs. Since you got into the past for him, then the future has not changed. And no matter how many opportunities and chances you use, Santa Claus will always give gifts, and they will believe in fairies at all times. Here, one of them, in a top hat, plump, runs to the Fuhrer - this is the Leprechaun Genie, fulfilling wishes. For a piece of chocolate, when there is a crisis in the world, he is ready to fulfill the desire of the Fuhrer, you see, he will fulfill the desire to destroy all people. Alas, no luck for those who ask for a lot. Genie was lured away, offered more sweets, switched sides, changed his mind, and one of the people wished a speedy end to the war. — the future would be for you without Hitler. Without the lives he killed, children and dogs. Since you got into the past for him, then the future has not changed. And no matter how many opportunities and chances you use, Santa Claus will always give gifts, and they will believe in fairies at all times. Here, one of them, in a top hat, plump, runs to the Fuhrer - this is the Leprechaun Genie, fulfilling wishes. For a piece of chocolate, when there is a crisis in the world, he is ready to fulfill the desire of the Fuhrer, you see, he will fulfill the desire to destroy all people. Alas, no luck for those who ask for a lot. Genie was lured away, offered more sweets, switched sides, changed his mind, and one of the people wished a speedy end to the war. — the future would be for you without Hitler. Without the lives he killed, children and dogs. Since you got into the past for him, then the future has not changed. And no matter how many opportunities and chances you use, Santa Claus will always give gifts, and they will believe in fairies at all times. Here, one of them, in a top hat, plump, runs to the Fuhrer - this is the Leprechaun Genie, fulfilling wishes. For a piece of chocolate, when there is a crisis in the world, he is ready to fulfill the desire of the Fuhrer, you see, he will fulfill the desire to destroy all people. Alas, no luck for those who ask for a lot. Genie was lured away, offered more sweets, switched sides, changed his mind, and one of the people wished a speedy end to the war. Santa Claus will always give gifts, and they will believe in fairies at all times. Here, one of them, in a top hat, plump, runs to the Fuhrer - this is the Leprechaun Genie, fulfilling wishes. For a piece of chocolate, when there is a crisis in the world, he is ready to fulfill the desire of the Fuhrer, you see, he will fulfill the desire to destroy all people. Alas, no luck for those who ask for a lot. Genie was lured away, offered more sweets, switched sides, changed his mind, and one of the people wished a speedy end to the war. Santa Claus will always give gifts, and they will believe in fairies at all times. Here, one of them, in a top hat, plump, runs to the Fuhrer - this is the Leprechaun Genie, fulfilling wishes. For a piece of chocolate, when there is a crisis in the world, he is ready to fulfill the desire of the Fuhrer, you see, he will fulfill the desire to destroy all people. Alas, no luck for those who ask for a lot. Genie was lured away, offered more sweets, switched sides, changed his mind, and one of the people wished a speedy end to the war.

The Fuhrer had nowhere to go, everyone hated and persecuted him. Many friends and comrades in arms defected to the side of the enemy in order to save their lives and the lives of their children. Many of the Germans hid that they were Jews, and executed their own kind, so as not to fall under the yoke of Hitler. Of course, the German ran, and jumped through the door and disappeared. In that dimension, time does not exist, as in ours. One minute equals a year, and a year equals a whole millennium. There the Fuhrer is hiding, in order to one day return and take revenge on humanity, when the earth becomes overpopulated, and there is not enough food for everyone - to arrange a genocide. In the meantime, Hitler, a cup with which the scientist Leo and the dirty Bobby, the flying crocodile, are washed down with coffee. Perhaps Hitler was right, and ahead of his time by many centuries, because survival is the most important thing.

The Führer always believed that in order to make people happy, medicine must be developed, and the human population must be reduced for one reason only - to save them from themselves, to give them freedom. Hitler wanted to lower the price of food, of things, to create an ideal place to live, where everyone would be happy. No crowds on buses, no queues at the checkout, no crumbs of bread in the closet. He wanted everyone to be fed and live in peace, but for this it was necessary to exterminate half of them. Part of humanity. Watching the production of machines and the construction of factories, the Fuhrer wept at night. He believed that people were destroying nature, the planet itself, Hitler wanted to stop the development of everything so that nature could begin to develop. A veil of greed covered the earth, people killed each other for the sake of wealth, but the Fuhrer did not kill for some papers, but for the sake of to free nature from the captivity of mankind. Alas, for his thoughts, they hated him and appointed him to the role of the most notorious criminal of mankind. He had to jump through the door. Disappear only to return one day. Where, what world? What will the planet be like in a thousand years?

For a lot of time in the future, for everything good you have to pay. People were afraid of smart people. Ahead of their time. But in the end everything comes to an end. The more people, the more money, but at the same time, less money. Workers receive undeservedly.

“It's amazing that so much is not written in history books,” Matvey was surprised, closing the book, “Hitler was a good man.

“I think it’s reasonable to assume so,” replied the Giraffe, smoothing his mane with his hoof, “But one thing is not clear, where did this come from to us?

“You know yourself,” Matvey looked at the door and swallowed his saliva, “It is she who works miracles, she reveals the truth.

Are you talking about God?

- It's about her. Or about him. This is matter of unknown origin. She created us with you, endowed with reason and home.

And wrote the past. Revealed the truth about the great minds.

- This is true.

Matthew put the book on the shelf next to a thousand others, where the truth about Napoleon, about Genghis Khan, Ivan the Terrible, about Caesar, the ruler of Rome, about Imhotep, the pharaoh of Egypt, and many other personalities who were considered evil, flaunted.

“They were all ahead of their time.

The head of a black grouse appeared from behind the shelves, it importantly went out to Matvey and spoke:

You know, we are part of history. In each of us there is a particle of the atom of these great people. Maybe that's why we think the same as they do and empathize with them?

“Anything happens,” a flea jumped from the top bookshelf, and lit a pipe importantly, “I’m great myself, I’m sure I have the blood of warriors and geniuses!”

Suddenly the door opened and Robinson Crusoe stepped out, holding Friday in his arms. Naked, stupid, sexy. From the outside it may seem that these are people, alas, Barbie dolls. And instead of hands they have boats, and instead of heads they have unwashed potatoes.

Thirty-four yellowmouth natives played amazing games. Two of them held poor Lomonosov by the hands, three beat him on the eyelashes, and the remaining twenty-nine tickled him between the ring finger and the little finger. Each time tickling between them, edible confetti rained down from between the fingers. Looking more closely at the whole spectacle, you can find a tiny dwarf running up the direction of the confetti waterfall, back home, pawing with small legs, cursing obscenely, food, like some kind of mosquito. By the way, on the other leg, the same amazing obscene dwarf was holding a mosquito on a leash by a string, a predatory and terrible monster, tame, so that if suddenly, when he had to leave his dimension, he could inject pain with the proboscis of a mosquito without causing pain to Lomonosov and return back into your dimension cutting a black hole between the little finger and the ring finger. Look there and a couple of bedspreads will suck, a pair of socks will be lost and a sofa in the hallway. So, for the first time in his life, Lomonosov learned what the universe is, and saw between the portal whole tiny and wonderful worlds that he would never have been able to detect with the devices of the eighteenth century, a nightmarish time. Two narrow-eyed octopuses looked into his eyes through the gap when he tried to put on his shoes, and tried to seduce the physicist and, by the way, an outstanding chemist, in order to stick to his lips and suck out all the nutritious juices. The very ones ... It was not for nothing that Lomonosov was famous for supplying grape juice to the Arkhangelsk province, as well as juice from lavender, from nettles and five glorious caterpillars that grazed in his meadow, among the fallen leaves of a cactus, almost the size of elephant. And fleas ran underfoot, boxing the caterpillars' udders like a punching bag, thereby softening the hardened fruits inside them, turning them into pulp, from the pulp of which glorious, fantastic nectar in the form of juice stood out. Lomonosov, forgot to milk the caterpillars, especially to get drunk with wine and wander around bars and taverns, seducing either the hangers at the entrance, or the trash cans on the floor, considering them to be ladies. However, he did not see any difference between them. Women hung on them just as hard as everyone else hung on hangers, and just as falling prostrate on the floor, as a bucket did, after another holiday, they kissed the discarded shoes of drunkards. Exactly the same as the ladies. Amid all this noxious stench lurked, it’s a sin not to remember, a real precious inhabitant of that Province, almost the only person in the entire Russian Empire, a janitor,

Collecting, the cleaner stirred them into the glasses and glasses of those artists who did not reach the bucket in order to throw out the bile from themselves, all the food and sour grape juice - that's why all those people vomited that they drank the same liquor from the floor every day . The cleaner would have had enough sense, and therefore, there would have been less work, that look and they would have paid less, therefore he continued his deed for many years, seeing the same faces. If on that day the dwarf Napoleon had not jumped out of Lomonosov's finger, swearing at the whole tavern, the janitor would not have stopped doing his job. Frightened, that man threw his vomit into a bucket and almost began to crawl in front of Napoleon, turning into a sheet of paper, but became a coward. Cleopatra saw these shorts and put them on, praising the one who forgot them on the floor. The janitor's joy knew no bounds. People that day for the first time did not fuck up a clean floor, and bartender Chuck Norris never saw anyone complain again. As soon as the bartender looked at the brick that he did not like, it evaporated, and if the bartender wanted to build another restaurant opposite his tavern, a house immediately ran from another settlement, kicked the inhabitants out of himself, and turned into a restaurant not with five out of five stars, but one hundred twenty five. And the dwarf Napoleon climbed, climbing onto the table, rubbing the wooden surface with his hands, collecting the remnants of alcohol and licking them, getting drunk and jumping to the floor, ran to Lomonosov, ripped his finger open and walked away, finally shouting obscenities in Latin, which no one understood. Then the natives smiled, released Lomonosov, and told him to earn more money, nothing else, they, by the way, are his children. Lomonosov often spent everything he earned on drinking, because the children, learning about his amazing little finger, they grabbed him and beat him until he turned red, so that they could at least eat sweets, even without tea, but with water and dried grasshopper paws that they caught in a clearing where the physicist arranged a pasture of insects from five deputies. The deputies' paws grew back. One was named Vitaly Ivanovich Kuznechikov, the second Vladimir Elbrusovich Kuznechikov, and those others were for the company, regional ass sweeteners, in a word, tails - where the deputies, there they are. If the legs of the deputies were fat, like the juiciest piece of cow meat, which had to be dried for days, look and weeks, then the legs of the “tails” were much thinner, and it was extremely easy to dry them. Until hunger came again, the legs grew back, not as fast as those of the deputies of higher rank, but still grew. An amazing property was once discovered by the natives at such a one breakfast, which happened late at night. Somehow, having fallen to the ground, the leg that had been torn off from the novice politician suddenly grew out of itself a second deputy, a clone of the first. How many times do not tear off your legs and do not throw on the ground, the deputy grew up, however, each time less and thinner, losing his properties. In the end, a deputy was born almost the size of a matchbox, here the natives did not think for a long time and ate the whole deputy, until one day ... one of the natives began to think like a deputy and not deceive other natives. Lomonosov immediately sensed this. The aboriginal stank very strongly. And plugged the fragrant passages with a corncob found in Narnia. Other aborigines might well have suffocated, but they got used to and listened to all the words of their brother. It was worth saying that meat spoils the body, that he was ready to take this sick burden on his stomach, the natives immediately took the firewood piled at the edge of the clearing and beat him until he lost consciousness and became an apostle that shared everything he found. Five broken bones in the body, and one hundred and forty-nine on the thigh, anyone could be convinced that they were wrong, that they had eaten enough for the past year, and the next five could be starving, nibbling Gulliver's hair, sniffing on the shore, behind their house. Hurricanes and tornadoes happened every few hours. Thirteen short men took a log and closed Gulliver's passage, from where terrible roars, terrible deadly tornadoes and snowstorms flew out. Five broken bones in the body, and one hundred and forty-nine on the thigh, anyone could be convinced that they were wrong, that they had eaten enough for the past year, and the next five could be starving, nibbling Gulliver's hair, sniffing on the shore, behind their house. Hurricanes and tornadoes happened every few hours. Thirteen short men took a log and closed Gulliver's passage, from where terrible roars, terrible deadly tornadoes and snowstorms flew out. Five broken bones in the body, and one hundred and forty-nine on the thigh, anyone could be convinced that they were wrong, that they had eaten enough for the past year, and the next five could be starving, nibbling Gulliver's hair, sniffing on the shore, behind their house. Hurricanes and tornadoes happened every few hours. Thirteen short men took a log and closed Gulliver's passage, from where terrible roars, terrible deadly tornadoes and snowstorms flew out.

Глава 7

In one tiny universe, probably one you've never even heard of, lived beautiful creatures - although those they ate did not consider them as such - cannibal socks. These strange creatures attacked surreptitiously, pounced on the feet of people when they were sleeping. That hour they ate the legs, then, as it happened in their culture of eating people, they attacked the defenseless sleeper in a joint, floating on the floor in order to gnaw him to the bone. A few socks always carried a trampoline with them to jump onto the bed. The eaten person remained asleep - after all, the socks introduced a paralyzing poison with their gentle touch, and in the morning, when the person got out of bed and went to the bathroom to wash, he fainted when he saw himself in the reflection of the mirror. The rumble was still the same. All the plaster was peeling off the walls. Termites woke up. They peeked through the cracks in the wall lit a cigarette, and throwing a rope over the edge of the gap, they descended to the skeleton on the floor to make a new home in it. So, the skeletons got a new disease - they were called contagious. Indeed, as soon as such a skeleton approached a friend with the same gnawed body, termites threw their ropes with hooks on them and moved towards them.

It's still nothing. Just imagine what was happening in the neighboring planet, it was a little more than Mars, by our standards - giants lived there, well, giants and giants, you say, we will calculate the same. Ordinary big people. But here's the thing, look at their hair. There are kangaroos grazing. They are fleas. They jump from one hair to another and eat hair, because they do this, bald people appear in the family of giants. You have to wear a hat-moss. Their bald head reflects the light of the sun and destroys the wheat crop in the field. Burns everything. These include, - to pests of giant hair, - and cows, which are raised by dragonflies and moved from one field of hair to another. They are not visible at all. But the giant who managed to crush such a pest brought disaster on himself. Thin, twisted worms appeared from the ground, made a hole in the giant's leg and crawled straight to the place where the blood of a kangaroo or a cow was shed to lick it. These worms, due to lack of speed, used people's veins like a subway to move to the top. Then they also disappeared into the ground, went to bed. And the wound never healed, so the giants had to make a plug out of wood, close the hole and live like that until the end of their lives. In addition, a bear could also live in such a hole. Warm lair, just for him. And the bear ate the giant from the inside. Don't pull out, don't kill. Warm lair, just for him. And the bear ate the giant from the inside. Don't pull out, don't kill. Warm lair, just for him. And the bear ate the giant from the inside. Don't pull out, don't kill.

But what is really going on underground, where the giants cannot get? Is there really more interesting life there than on the surface. Let's get on the train and take a look, oops...someone bumped into us. Look at his impudent mug, this is a freight train-worm, he completely lost his fear, crashed into a locomotive of visitors. But never mind, the locomotive will grow a limb in a couple of days. In the meantime, the part that is cut off will grow a head on its own and find its way home.

Only they need to be filled with grandmother's pies. It is for such cases that two grandmothers are kept.

Below we are met by the conductor - a centipede, on each leg on the head, so as not to miss a single visitor to the attraction. So called places where they used slave labor for a small fee. A glass of milk could well please the boss - Mouse Krysevich. Mouse father, rat mother. And for a sack of grain one could become a slave for a year. Beetles from all over the world come here to get a taste of the work. Only Kirka, whose head was constantly smashed against stones, complained of a headache, so he was prescribed a dose of reprimands. Kirk endured. But in the end, by the beginning of the next shift, one of the bugs still died from it. But it was impossible to prove it. The guard, the mole, could not confirm anything.

Of course, where on the rides without light, the light was here, you can’t work in the dark. The fireflies also worked in shifts, lying on hammocks on the ceiling. When the energy began to leave, they drank a glass of radium or uranium, in rare cases palladium, and continued to shine. One shift could last both a day and a year. And until the shift was worked out, the other fireflies did not get to work, they were locked in coffins. And a turtle was sitting on top of the coffin so that they would not come out. Dead. She often talked about how she died.

“That year was overcast, it was raining under water,” she began, and fell asleep.

“We still don’t know the end of this story,” whispered the flies gathered next to the corpse, “But it’s scary, very scary.

Terribly out of the corner.

- Why are you so angry, do not let you sleep, what do you need?

- Scary!

Indeed, this frightened the flies, and they scattered. They had a heart grenade inside that exploded with every fright.

And somewhere there, even deeper, there was a city, in that city lived Mechanic Hippos, Meat Grinder Jackals, Banker Leprechauns and Ballerina Elephants. Of course, the city is not limited to them, and besides them, those who were exiled from the surface live here - bandits and recidivists. Jail hares are following him. The disobedient are taken to the director - the Dinosaur, and no one else sees them. But each time passing near his office, the gorilla throws a bag of bones into the pit. From those bones, a few days later, they build sculptures. The mummy of Tutankhamun is engaged in all art. He is handsome, smart and inventive. Indeed, a loner. As soon as he talks to someone, they immediately become sand. Therefore, everyone was afraid of Tutankhamen, and when they saw him walking along the road, the windows were closed, earplugs were plugged into his ears, and the executioners postponed the execution and locked themselves in the basement under the place of execution.

It's amazing, imagine that the executioner's ax was quite unusual, of course, everything on this planet would be ordinary! Ax - predatory ants tied to each other, on their skulls, iron jaws are sharp as a knife. They are built lengthwise, tightened on an iron handle. It is worth swiping and hitting the guilty person, as the ants begin to work with their mouths and devour the person’s neck. They are hungry. It can take months between the first and second treasury decisions. In a fraction of a second, they chop off the neck with their jaws, as if they were not some kind of insects, but an ordinary ax. Hot butter knife. Once the executioner fell asleep at the workplace, and there were no bones left of him. And yet, farm workers often borrowed this ax to mow the grass near the hangars - to collect wheat, corn and other crops. When the ants were full, they simply destroyed everything they reached without eating.

And yet, just a mile down the road, where the skins of murdered prisoners are hung, dried, and tables set instead of tablecloths, there is the sea, just like on the surface. Black black. There is a black hole at the bottom of the sea, from where fish and animals come from other universes - so, new species are discovered, they are caught and made into dinner. True, once Godzilla appeared from such a hole and ate half of the mountain where the Yeti lived. He was offended, called a meeting of his kind and went hunting. For a whole month, the Yeti created a huge robot to take revenge on the alien, and soon they finished. And instead of attacking, Godzilla fell in love with this robot. The cavemen had to retreat, because Godzilla found a weak spot in the robot - the rear, emergency entrance. Several Yeti drowned there while operating the robot. I had to leave the robot, and, after that, no one saw Godzilla.

It would be foolish to have such a space without knowing the birds. There are birds. Flying shorts, soaring teapot eagles, mop storks, microwave pelicans, column swifts, boomerang gulls. Don't ask where they came from. They have always lived here. Therefore, they were caught and sold in stores. Microwave ovens were expensive, asking for at least seventeen kettles. But the shorts were not so expensive, although no one could argue with the fact that they were much more useful - putting them on yourself, you could fly through the sky. And isn't it easier for flying people to catch both a microwave oven and a kettle? No one wanted to steal the job of salespeople. Therefore, animals and people, insects and similar creatures, could only fly over the seas. It was scary and frightening to fly over the seas - a free, free zone. There were sharks who jumped out at least one kilometer and preyed on their kind. After all, the shorts could lift only some three hundred meters and no more.

Let's take a look at the sea, how the sharks themselves live. They have kitchens and houses, utensils and children they send out every morning to hunt. There they are taught physics and algebra, taught to calculate the angle of inclination and gravity, the force of gravity and wind speed, so as not to miss when jumping to the surface. A dozen strength must be in the tail and flippers of sharks in order to fly to the victim. Therefore, at first, moms and dads feed them themselves, and sometimes when one of them gets sick, they eat the patient. Of course, in hospitals you can buy adrenaline, a medicine to increase strength. Killer whales treat them kindly. The fee is two storks per serving. Sharks can hunt, but killer whales can't work. Spend more time with family. There is no such money in the seas. Payment is life. The pay is food. The pay is time.

By the way, about time. Terrible creatures. Creatures… they seem to be small, but if you let them near you, they will suck all the time out of you. Creepy mosquitoes and dust mites. They live in the air, fly where they want and hunt whoever they want. And the worst thing is not that they drink blood, but time itself - existence. For them, it makes no difference who to kill, what to destroy and where to live. They can take life from a tree, as well as from animals, from aircraft or buildings.

As soon as mosquitoes stick their trunks - and the most insatiable of these monsters, can rust a building built yesterday - and it will collapse. Or sit on a baby, and the baby will age ten years. The skin will wrinkle, flour and suffering will appear in the eyes. There is no protection from them. Everything comes down to chance and luck. Mosquito nets ... laughter, and nothing more. Just a year for one touch, and the mesh becomes fluff and flies into the room, like a mosquito. And dust mites crawl across the floor. Their bite is deadly. They do not know satiety. A tick that has settled in a bed destroys an entire family, burns out entire fields, and forces the most persistent to retreat. But is it worth pushing them? Who knows... Is it profitable?

The gorilla once crushed one when he threw out the bones of the chief's victims, and a whirlwind of wind rose into the sky, and time flew away in different directions. So, just a few days later, the gorilla found out, and then told everyone in the area, how an invisible disaster came from a crushed tick - a wave of time from a vortex, sticking to a building, gave the opposite effect - and reversed time. And the place where the building was, a once destroyed prison was formed, a thousand years ago, with its murdered prisoners and guards, bringing them back to life. The crushed tick returned time, but not to those. And the underground city is again inhabited by bandits, and there is a prison.

A cold wind hit my face and I gave back. We fought all day, rested a little at night, then dined on promises and stuffed hope, and started beating each other again. A large, round, but slightly square black eye flaunted on the face of the wind, nothing showed off on me, because I was against being painted.

The next time the wind attacked me, I evasively dodged its fists. Anger did not help the wind, he stood near the gate, ate pies with onions and laughed, “what a scythe he is, he cannot hit a lying one,” he constantly grinned. A comet then fell on him and crushed him to hell. I would never have thought that the devils know how to rejoice. Above their heads, above hell, a huge pimple resembling a cow's udder popped out, and anger came out like ketchup from a package. And the devils were happy about that, they peppered him and cut off a piece of skin, sending it down the throat. The comet then got up, dusted itself off, climbed onto the trampoline and flew off on its own business.

But despite this, I was a quirky worm, and danced lying down, like an epileptic, first in one direction, then in the other, the wind blows did not reach, until someone lifted me from the ground, squeezing my skull. This monster took my head and put me on a hook, gently pulling my body up and down. When I got out, and I wanted to crawl away and never see this monster again, he caught me at the last moment and again planted another hook in my ass and threw it into the water. It was not enough for him to humiliate me like that - the horror that was going on inside me - so he still tried, not believing that he had finished with me, to drown me, exactly and for sure!

He tried, of course, for a long time - I pulled the line all the time, and he quickly pulled me out from under the water, I took a breath, and again went under the water - but only when I again pulled the hook out of myself, then pulled the line , - the first thing I did, emerging from under the water, was kicking that creature in the stomach, from which it fell, crouched, turned red and became an apple. He grabbed his knee with both hands and began to cry. It was too late. I made a hole in it and settled down to live. At first, I saw a hole behind it, which means someone had already settled there, and climbed in there, it stank, but it was quite comfortable, like in my last house. He bit into the intestines, made a hole in the stomach and crawled to the lungs. Mom always predicted a bright future for me, but here it was dark, dark, like in a dead man's dream.

Having reached the lungs, at the reception I was met by a crab athlete and a squirrel gymnast, behind them, clinging to the floor, a lonely, playful cat was crawling. A mouse in black sunglasses pulled her by the leash. With a click of his boots, the mouse turned to the kitty and waved its paws. Immediately the cat got up, ran up to her, and began to clean the path along which she was walking with her tongue. I didn't care about them, but I asked how they were feeling when they wiped their face. The crab athlete crawled out to me, threw back three silky hairs behind his head and said with a smile that you can live here, after which he took a cocktail from the table. The squirrel supported the crab by snapping its empty, toothless mouth. Of course, it was all interesting, but I got sick of it even in that life. I grabbed the squirrel by the head and forced the toothless mouth to work. After all, I was a worm completely, because it worked all over my body. Terrible and disgusting. It was terrible to enter it completely and see how several flies were dancing in the guts, drunk, and a drug addict centipede was sitting next to it, with a syringe on each leg.

- Welcome, come in!

Several hundred times the squirrel forced me to enter it, the throat opened and closed. And I was sick. Several insects gathered under me, one can say a hundred, and began to take a shower with the words "holy slime." The squirrel immediately stopped tugging at me and smiled.

“In this case,” she said, “I ate a worm.

I swallowed my saliva and I was scared, very scared. I haven't seen my friends for several days.

I should have told her before I had to force her to suck me. I coughed again and vomit poured out of me. Immediately the squirrel fell and began to convulse until the insects crawled out of it and dived into the vomit and began to swim, freestyle and canine style. I left them here. Went further.

Thirteen and a half windmills stood along the walls of the lungs, near the capillaries. The lungs were blown by the air, so pleasant and cool. The door near one of the mills opened and cigarette smoke jumped out onto the soft, wet floor, shouting "I'm here and I'm not going anywhere." He stuck to the walls and began to kiss them. In response, an old, grouchy, shriveled cancer appeared from the wall. Coughing up blood, he greeted his bosom friend. Then he went to the capillaries, opened the faucet, took out a cup from his pocket, and poured blood.

“I’ve been waiting for you for an eternity,” the cancer began, “since the day the universe was born in Copernicus’ down jacket.

“Forgive me for the longitude,” cigarette smoke settled on the floor, “I have been looking for a way here for a long time, you understand.

- Understand. Poorly bad, but still here you are. In ten years we will be able to kill this body and find fresh, new and delicious.

- Just?

- All that, but all of him.

What they were talking about even I understood. I didn’t feel scared because of this, the same smoke lived inside me. After tapping on his chest, I called him, he came out and greeted his colleagues. The second did not wait. Got angry. Having broken a rib, I cut off part of my chest and stuck my head inside, like in a refrigerator, and began to search for that insolent person. That insolent fellow ran from me, made circles near the heart, threatened me with a penknife, then sledged through the veins, but in the end I caught him and pulled him out of me.

— Oh, cancer! - another crayfish was delighted, - it’s worth working together, it will take only five years.

“All right, all right,” the younger crayfish yelled, not so twisted, but already a raisin.

So I got rid of my son. He needed to move long ago, to find a place for existence and meaning. Didn't cry. My son’s grandmother came to my crying, screamed loudly and I felt ashamed that she was my mother.

Exhaling, I got out of my lungs and went to the brain. Oh, how majestic and wise. His fat head blocked the entire view of the outside world. Little midget doctors ran on it, calculated something, glued it and sewed it together. It became immediately clear, a big shot with his slaves. Looking at me, my brain began to spit knowledge. Poisonous knowledge, untested. Of course, among them were paramount ones, such as “how to heal wounds with a broken heart”, “how to achieve greatness”, “what needs to be done to collect ten likes” and many other things that are absolutely important for him, but completely useless for me. . He began to speak the truth from the door, as soon as I entered.

- I know a lot about you, come in, and I want to know why you came, only for God's sake, without snot.

So the brain said because the seventeen cleaners did not have time to put the mucus in buckets, then pack it in bags, the brain in some way was itself that slug. And in the field of knowledge jerk. It used to drip from the nose on frosty days, a person's brain snot flowed out. From that people became fools that they lost themselves. But the worms did not have these weaknesses, and therefore they did not have a brain either.

I told him everything as it is, without details and truth. The brain nodded, parted the wrinkles in his body and said that he had been waiting for such a specialist for a long time. I smiled, somehow maliciously even, and climbed into it. And entered the magical world. I have never seen this anywhere. Twenty-three chameleons lined up inside him and designed new worlds. By changing color, they created fantasies. They changed everything around themselves and everything around those they created. Standing in the center of that wonderful place, the magic happened to me. Turning into an eagle, I began to soar over a huge, boundless planet, there was no end to that place - and below peacocks flaunted, bison climbers along the ridges of the mountains, and swans cartographers flew slowly behind me.

I couldn't bear this. Someone was better than me. And immediately everything changed, I became a swan, and a buffalo, and a peacock's tail. And with all eyes he began to see at the same time and be able to simultaneously everything in the world. I liked this much more.

- Carefully! - Zeus flew past me at breakneck speed in a chariot. Seahorses and stingrays chased him with lightning.

I didn’t think of them exactly, but the understanding of this came to me immediately. Impulses of madness and insanity are evident. The first signs of a split personality, depression and schizophrenia. And it was not someone else's, but my own, dear.

Pillars of fire rose from the ground and I fell backwards. The earth was moving. Instead of mountains, there was a huge face, it looked at me and looked up, rolled its eyes. Then she turned away and laughed. This was my second person, I never saw him, but he always saw me. Personality has never left magic, and I have never looked at the side of wonder before. Then the earth began to be like a cake stuck to the bottom of the pan, rise and crack, huge cracks. I haven't felt so defenseless since I was inside a squirrel. The other me, the personality, lifted me in her palms and sent me into her mouth, suddenly ... the personality scattered into many small butterflies, and ahead I saw the dawn, and pterodactyls, birds and dragons flew towards it, and jumped from cloud to cloud along the edges emerald fish and sapphire crickets.

The clouds were drawn in, something began to flicker, the sky was painted with the colors of fireworks. These were some strange, magical, instead of lights, fireflies. They went up into the air and set off the little explosives on the body, and they shattered into many fragments of colorful, burning jewels. From those stones, a miracle to be that, and magic is expensive, fairies hatched, setting in motion the whole life of the universe. By waving the magic wands several times, the exploded fireflies returned to life, the ones they spawned.

I fell down all this time, but there was no end to it. I thought I was not a worm at all, and not an eagle, but a frozen spot on the windshield of a snowboarder. As if I didn’t fly somewhere into the abyss, but stood here all this time. Butterflies reappeared, grabbed me, and we flew to the castle on the clouds. I was afraid that I would have to dive in the stomach of a butterfly, looking for food, and in the hope of finding a way out, eat a butterfly. The butterfly itself looked at me with bulging eyes, and realized that I was a bloodthirsty killer and began to sweat, then completely cried. Round candies of different colors rolled from her eyes, and falling to the ground turned into turtles, flowers and bungalows.

Having flown to the castle, the butterflies disappeared, dissolved in milk on the castle wall, becoming a drop of oil. I reached the very main throne in the castle quickly, a person was sitting on it, playing chess with Alexander the Great, a disgrace, nothing else! From Macedonia itself, you see, he came. And how many ways from there to here and distances. A bunch of. In the sink of the toilet, in the rose on the windowsill, in the carpet in the garden. He found one. Needless to say, it's a big deal.

Approaching the person, Makedonsky got up from his chair, slapped his cheek and, like the wind, took off and flew away through the window. I didn’t stand on ceremony, unscrewed my head, chewed it several times, screwed it back in, and said that there was no bile and poison in me, except for the most important thing, the mind. There was a lot of it in me, otherwise I would not have been able to get into these possessions, control magic and, in general, get to the wise brain in an apple. Everyone knows very well and has the knowledge that there are brains in an apple, otherwise they would not grow in the same way as people, like plants and animals. I nodded, but had no idea what he was talking about.

He told a lot, forgot everything. The floor cracked and I fell down. Downstairs there was a huge picture of “Bears in a Pine Forest”, I flew into that reality like oil mixed with fat, and the bears tore me into pieces, hung me on strings and dried me. I held on. Spared their misunderstanding. Regretted. But when one of them sat down at the table without washing his hands, I lost my temper, straight out of myself, and through the deflection I threw him to the floor, then bit off his hand. The other two wanted to pounce on me, I stopped them with a glance, and burned a brand of fear into them. They trembled, jumped on the table and became jelly. Student was great. It always gives me pleasure to eat jelly, where the meat is full.

The apple began to rot completely. It seemed that someone picked up an apple from the ground and took a bite. The magical world shook. Chameleons stood and served without hesitation, magic did not leave the world of miracles.

- Carefully! - lightning, this is the second time in a day, Zeus plays the role of a madman, but I'm the madman here.

The sky was boundless, the playfulness boundless. Having caught up with the scorcher on foot, I put my hand on his shoulders and said that it was time to go out, you can’t hide behind my back forever. FOR SO LONG TIME NO ONE SQUEEZED ME OR TWISTED ME YET!

Since I became part of one of the dreadlocks on the head of a mulatto, a gift from Zeus, Armstrong's granddaughter, beautiful and amazingly sexy, I was constantly drowned in the bathtub, doused with acid. Therefore, I myself wanted to become them, because at any time I could wish otherwise. I liked it, except for those days when they pulled me by the legs and tried to vomit. It was scary for the mulatto, because to snatch me meant tearing off her head. Therefore, I myself voluntarily left it.

After thanking the chameleons for their work, I came out of my brain and said that I fixed everything that was broken. No matter how wise the brain was, he believed me. Taking the train to the lungs, saying goodbye to cancer and a few other friends at the reception, I found myself outside an apple and fell behind the collar of some creature.

- Oh, you worm! the creature screamed.

- Yobuski-Sparrows! — I was surprised, and shouted in response, — fu! Wormy? What an abomination!

I climbed on that creature, kicked it on the eardrum, the creature rolled down and, therefore, the drum. The musicians gathered around him, and the concert began. I danced the drum and gave vocal lessons. And then ... the wind picked me up, carried me to a hill near my house and began to beat my fists in the face. I dodged as best I could. I was often called a dodger.

The square black eye in the wind has almost healed, wrapped with tape around the face, and stuck with a band-aid.

“Peace,” I told him, and he replied:

“Peace,” and we flew off to take over the world.

Just our hand was exciting.

In the representation the world seemed huge, but when we took the world out of the device near the dining room for five rubles, it turned out to be not so huge for us. But how amazing it was for those inhabitants who were born on that world, in a small round chewing gum that we knocked out with the wind. But when we looked through a microscope, we saw how people like us look into exactly the same microscope in their world, and those in that microscope look into another exactly the same world. AND WE LOOKED UP AND LOOKED AT THE SKY. For the first time in our lives, we discovered that the blue sky is the blue tint of God's eyes.

And how many people like me, even higher than us, govern us, and each deed is reflected in the deed of us. I dropped the gum on the floor and kicked it. Immediately, day and night began to change one after another, moment by moment, so quickly that we began to fly in the air.

Who dared to manage the days, we didn’t even ask a question, apparently, we were the gods of this world and at the same time were hostages of the one who threw the world on the floor. The wind picked up the chewing gum from the floor, and a hurricane began in the world in which we were, the trees became floating, the cars flying, and the store completely turned upside down and shattered to smithereens - small pieces crashed into the eyes of people, shards of glass cut flesh, and billiard balls destroyed houses. A little more, you could burn a hole into space in the void, open a black hole.

The wind threw the ball at me, I picked it up, and the hurricane subsided. With all my strength I threw it to the ground, it flattened and shattered into pieces, and suddenly, there were three of us. Then we became five, ten, a hundred, a thousand, a million and a billion, and each time more and more. As we grew, so did the planet and our growth. We were all on the same planet, in the same world. As more of us arrived on earth, the planet grew to accommodate all of us. Soon, the universe began to expand more to accommodate us, it seemed that the planet became the universe itself, the universe itself. Now, each of those who arrived had their own mind and could do as they pleased. But they acted exactly the same as we do, having the same mind, life, thoughts, desires.

A flurry of storms fell from under the sky, Zeus descended, waved his trident and everyone was gone, disappeared, and the planet regained its former appearance, and we closed the chewing gum in a transparent flask to protect the universe.

A door under the ground opened, four demons came out, they gossiped among themselves, grabbed the wind, and closing the hatch, evaporated. Their steam rose to the top and became gaseous gold, showering the world with ash and snow. Incredibly nimble armadillos hatched from snowflakes, grabbed a pebble in their paws and ran up the hill, after which they threw them to the ground, and huge baobabs grew, no less, up to the moon itself. There they made houses, knitted sweaters, watered the flowers on the lawn and repaired tractors. Wonderful. And dragonflies emerged from the ashes. Armadillos mounted them and flew to the treetop cities in the neighborhood. The neighbors were disgusting!

“Why are you all like this, yes, like that,” I shouted, crawled to the root of the tree, and bit it off. Milk poured in and the tree immediately began to shrink, and suddenly, don't get me wrong, it turned into a table, and immediately there was dinner on that table, armadillos running with an apron on their backs, laying out treats. One was confusing me with pasta, took a fork and mixed in the sauce, but I spared him, no one had done such a mask to my body for a long time. Refreshed, I climbed out of the plate and spit out the mayonnaise. The starling hatched from the mayonnaise and flew away.

Mirrors are the road to a parallel universe, the world of opposites. A world where, in order to achieve people's hatred, you need to do a good deed, help someone, give a helping hand, feed someone, share a blanket, break off a piece of bread. The government has always killed such people and prosecuted, referring to the fact that they are able to help themselves, and helping them meant going against the government. Aren't hands given to people to get? Are given. Are legs donated just to sit and walk, soiling the irrigated land? Of course no.

The people bowed down and idolized those who did evil. In the world of mirrors, it is necessary to kill, torment, cheat on a partner, not share food, but belittle the homeless and disadvantaged. Hang animals on the windowsill, and pour flowers and all kinds of plants with sulfuric acid or oil. The destitute themselves laughed at this, kissing the shoes of those who kicked them, idolized.

Thank you, sir, for your grace.

There used to be tears. Why are they so favored, why did they deserve the attention of someone so important? That's how it's been done from time immemorial. So people of the mirror worlds show their care and attention. It was attention that deserved respect in the world of mirrors - a kick in the ass, an extinguished cigarette in the eye, boiling water spilled on the head. Any attention was valued more than anything else in the universe on this side of the world of mirrors.

In the room of every person it is - a mirror. When touched, you will be pulled into that world. Wonderful place.

This is where I would be God. The best in their understanding.

But only the gods have too many problems. Help him, listen to him, despise those, love others. People do too many good deeds, play with children instead of flogging insolent people. At first, people are born with the right thoughts, but after a while the government changes their attitude, opinion, and children grow up with the understanding that kind people become cannon fodder, not needed for society. Children want to be needed, important to society. When the government of a country says to help someone, people perceive it as destroying unwanted people. The brain somehow translates the word “love” into “kill” or “hate”. In fact, when humanity cries out in pain, the words are distorted, and turn into a lump, after which they again gather into words - vile, mirror, disgusting. The disgusting is here. While flying through the air

And the fights are beautiful. Semolina porridge is boiled from blood, and jewelry is made from the bones of enemies. The concept of "enemy" is relative here, of course. The most hated enemy is a friend. The very best. They hate each other, and constantly beat and rob each other's houses. And secretly from the eyes of the government, they drink cocoa together and discuss the most successful hours, how many unfortunates they managed to humiliate, and how many dogs they threw into the cesspool. As soon as someone else appeared through the door in the house, the second one got up and hit his “enemy” with his fist in the face, the second fought back, lifting a chair from under his ass. To show that they are no worse than those who live under them. Then ... they attacked the one who complained to them.

The greeting of people in the mirror is to kick guests, hit on the head with a stone in a sock, break legs, pull out hair with non-cutting scissors, and rip fluff off the skin with glue.

It used to happen that the kettle boils, the son who returns from school comes in, the father gets up and hits his son with the kettle, and makes him drink boiling water. The more wounds such children had, the more respectful they were treated by their peers. And the dead were given an order of honor, however, not much different from our orders for services to the country; murder, abuse, outrage and rape. Such is it, heroism, in all worlds.

But, as in all worlds outside the mirrors, there were entire generations of "untouched" - no matter how good they did, they were not touched. Those who have served their time are veterans of the world of mirrors. They possessed amazing power, nightmarishly terrible, that fantasy is a mockery of their power. "Untouched" - destroyed entire countries, cities, civilizations. Atlantis still exists in the mirror, and the Mayan peoples are walking along the streets, there are very few of them, they are hiding from the “untouched”, because the task of those is to destroy everyone who lives there, and has ever lived.

But not only people live in a parallel world, here, animals have a mind. It is worth noting that cats are quite cunning and know how to get out of any situation, unlike bears, they do not need this. Everyone here loved bears, if I may say so about the killers. The Browns destroyed people and ate them, tore their throats, then went home, to the den, to stock up food for the winter. People lived in the lair every now and then, in cages, which were placed here out of spite, for the sake of laughter. The bear came, bit into the bars, roared, reached out to them with its paws, but the iron did not give in. People waited for the beast to fall asleep and reached for human flesh to eat. Waking up, the bear looked around the den and furiously ran out of it. It always seemed to him that they visited him. That is why he avenged and killed. It's hard to get along with the beast.

The bear understood both the meaning of the mirror world and the meaning of the real world. In ours, they would be called crazy, but here ... he is his own.

People tried, they really tried. They threw bones and stones at him, poured sand on him while he was sleeping, and told him to kill them without any delay. They thought that in this way they could at least hope for release, but the words had exactly the opposite effect, and the bear always tried to kill and eat them from now on. People humbled themselves in front of each other ... did good, massaged through the bars while he was sleeping, shared half-eaten meat to “appease”, they even vomited from their actions, but the bear did not give in. In his eyes, the people were bullying him just like the people outside.

- Hypocritical, lying bitches! - the bear yelled, grabbed a boulder and threw it on the cage, - Inhuman creatures! - who would talk more about humanity. And really not for him. He could not be reproached with the fact that he is a man and is obliged to do good and evil while protecting humanity. He is a beast, and man is his enemy.

In addition to animals, in the mirror world they had a mind and all objects that did not have it in ours; tables, chairs, vases, carpets, sideboards, spoons, a board leaning against the house, glass, and even a picture. The picture all the time led discussions and told what it was like to live and watch people walking around her and not saying hello, not slowing down to see the scarlet peonies on it, an old woman picking tomatoes in the garden, or dogs frolicking in the hay. The picture is embarrassing. Suddenly, the rains poured in it, the hay and the dogs got wet, and the old woman could not run to the porch of the house and fell on her back and slipped back into the garden - the tomatoes scattered, crushing the peonies located on the sides of the garden. Planted for beauty.

The picture observed the picture of the world; the same thing, every day. She was so fed up with everything around that she wanted to have legs to run away from here, jump from the window, dissolve somewhere behind a meadow of daffodils, behind huge sunflower stalks, lie down in a field of corn, and look at the stars, look and dream about traveling through space . It was lucky in the days when people came to take it with them and transport it to neighboring cities, countries. The picture saw the world from the car window, rejoiced, and there was not a day when it did not rain. The old woman groaned, cursed, cursed the weather, raising her hand to the clouds; hung, as if glued.

The dogs lay under the porch, trembling, their noses cold, cold, they were out of the puddle, ran up to the old woman, barked, jumped, then again ran under the porch. The old woman immediately threw the bucket on the ground and ran home, went out with a saucepan and gave them something to eat. Water dripped into the pan, the dogs wrinkled their noses. Only there were never birds in this world, an old woman did not wake up in the morning to the singing of a nightingale or a thrush, and she never knew a world where there were rivers, and fish swam along those rivers.

One thing could entertain her - conversations with a picture about life, being. The picture described what she saw, told what could be seen outside of her world. The old woman gasped, and became a dreamer, a little girl Nyuta.

In the room with the picture there were chairs covered with a lace cloth tablecloth, slippers thrown by the owners, a fireplace that never ignited, and cold, marble busts of prominent artists. Their conversations did not stop. Picasso argued with Michelangelo in the Sistine Chapel. Theodore Roosevelt, breathless, told Lincoln about how he became the only youngest president of the United States, and Mendeleev examined the beautiful lines on the neck of Marilyn Monroe. Only Chekhov did not speak and did not examine anyone, he listened to the sound of the surf in the picture, located behind him.

Chairs rustled, their tongues rustling like falling leaves in autumn. From what the tablecloth laughed, it became clear at once; conversations tickled her, shaving with a quivering wind, soft and calm. Fireplace was covered with anger, spitting fire, and often apologized. No one lit the fireplace, he knew how to do it himself.

In the same room, a carpet hung on a brick wall above the fireplace. The carpet spoke softly, barely audibly, with a bass - coughed, dust clogged in his mouth, spat, throwing "dreadlocks" up to his eyes. On the right side of the fireplace, and the fireplace was located exactly in the center of the room against the wall, there was a bookcase with shelves for books, at least two meters high and one and a half along. There were countless books, each of them had its own story, a magical world. A small child who had barely learned to walk entered the room, went up to the shelves and pulled out one of the books from below, sat down on an armchair, threw it on the coffee table, and the book spoke. She told amazing stories. The lives of the heroes who lived inside. The boy smiled, soon fell asleep. The book went on and on talking, talking about how a boy like the boy in the chair could fly, and confronted the evil Captain Hook. Waking up he took the book back to its place, and, stretching on his toes, went away from the room. The busts kept arguing and arguing, paying no attention to the boy. Only Chekhov, out of the corner of his eye, saw him, and followed him through the door with his eyes.

Books whispered, talked to each other, it happened that one rewrote a new story for itself and grew.

The room is small, but cozy, warm, with the smell of cinnamon, old books and longing. Light filtered through the curtained windows, drawing a straight bridge to the floor, dust dancing in the light, rising sharply and making tricks in the air. The bust of Mendeleev sneezed. There were never enough hands. The room was cool, the curtains rose up, almost reaching the exit, and easily lay down on the floor, and wandered back - the hinges flew out of the windows, and it opened. The room filled with the smell of autumn. A bullfinch appeared on the windowsill, took off and sat on a table in the room, then bouncing, quietly, approached the plate of berries. Grabbing a bunch of mountain ash, the bullfinch got up, made several circles around the room, hitting Roosevelt's head with a bunch, and flew out the window.

- Dirty! Get me some more! - Theodore shouted, and continued small talk with Abraham Lincoln, - At the first half ...

And what happened during the first half of something, somewhere or sometime, it was hardly possible to find out, their wind folded into a tube, then into a small lump and carried it out the window, to the expanses of the world. The sun was shining here. Warm. Crimson puddles. White clouds. Happy beaten people.

Unfortunately, a person who got and returned back to the world from where he came from noticed that not a second of time had passed in reality. Disappointed, they tried to return to the looking glass, but those who left once were not allowed back. Trying to live by the rules of those worlds, in the end people were captured and sent to exile on Wikipedia, I would like to say so, but alas, to prison, where he ate the food of the taxpayers and lived in heated cells at the expense of the people he hates. He even liked being so wrong, not like everyone else, but in the end, he was the same as everyone around. Not some special, amazing, but the same as the whole crowd around. This understanding did not come, with age, over the years, even before death, and a person died in bed, thinking that he had lived a fate unlike any other life. Alas, how they did not write books and articles about such characters,

One of many, many by one.

If dwarfs say they feel pressure from the tall ones; they are not joking. It is worth stepping on them, walking among the bookshelves, the cries of dwarfs wake up the formidable, stern and ruthless librarian Klavdia Nikiforovna Petrovskaya, who is capable of making a carpet out of a person with a blow of a pointer; decorate the walls of unoccupied spaces behind the shelves. These exhibits will be a favorite place of pilgrimage for students who have never known art; poke fingers, tickle, study - rugs will laugh without words, and they will be tickled, but without the ability to scratch their limbs. Only towards the end, just before the closing of the library, the rugs become people and leave - red belly, faces, crooked lines of tears on the cheeks. Only at the end of the day the library loses the power of magic.

It hurts to feel like a small thing in your pocket when you know that you are made for big things. Especially - plunging into the big toe of a normal person. Sometimes, walking among the stories, canoeing in the ocean, immersed in books with the soul, leaving the physical body on the other side outside the book dimensions - dwarfs now and then enter the shoes - as if into some kind of hut - a person, without hesitation, with with their pillows and blankets, and go to bed. They bring tiny balloons, tiny tiles, and tiny knives; they cut the flesh from the finger and fry it - for dinner, apart from meat, there can be no other, obviously.

As soon as the library closes, the stories go back to the books, having faded from the minds of the readers. Klavdia Nikiforovna Petrovna pulls them out with a pointer before leaving and places them in the sacred places. The next day, students return for a new portion of books, they seem to remember what happened, but they want more, but they cannot visualize what they read last night.

Books are drugs.

The funniest thing about it; the librarian not only selects stories, but at the same time shares them with her mind, feeds them, and knows exactly as much as the visitors have read. So, when people come to her and ask about a book, she can easily suggest books read by others, but left in her memory. But asking her about the ones she has no idea about sends readers to the dark side of the library - unread. People themselves find and study, but in the end, before the exam, they realize that everything has disappeared from their heads, and what they read in their heads has not stuck at all. She was to blame for everything - the stern Claudia Nikiforovna Petrovna.

She so enjoyed watching the children tremble, forget, mumble and get angry because of their meager memory. But only the librarian knew the secret of their failure. So, at least, the students came back, and the cruel woman fed the mind with food. By the way, the librarian herself had no idea why she could remember so much and put what she read in her head - was there magic, as she thought, and did she turn people into wall rugs? Maybe… it was just an illusion, a memory implanted in her head. The life that never was.

She believed in this and felt literally alive, but in reality she was an android sent from the future to study books lost in the past, save them to memory cells and hard drives. Once upon a time, here, instead of her, there lived another android, but lost behind the bookshelves. They say he broke down, others believe he ran away. But we assume it was stolen.

Here, inside her, lived dwarfs no larger than the cap of a tube of toothpaste, repairing Claudia Nikiforovna Petrovna, and meanwhile charging her. So, for example, when she was eating, the dwarfs-loaders quickly ran up to the sandwich - one of them pressed the button lowering the circular saw from the top of the palate, for cutting, others pulled the food behind them and threw it into the mouth of the ventilation hole in the throat. And below, on a chain, were worms that devoured food, which processed them into radioactive balls of energy, which fed all the important parts of the librarian. Hardly more than a pea, but the energy of which was enough for a month of charging one such android. There were at least five of them.

Claudia Nikiforovna Petrovna is a terrible woman with artificial intelligence, brought up by the old worldview, a bias towards humanity and faith in higher powers. Alas, none of the dwarfs knew what higher powers she revered. True, they developed it, but, unfortunately, they could only change memory cells, filling them with new knowledge of past centuries.

In the future, they say, people have become stupid, and cannot understand what hats, electricity, airplanes are for, and how cars start - strange, given that androids are no worse, if not bigger and more complicated than cars. But at the same time, in the future, Claudia Nikiforovna Petrovna has already returned and therefore she was built; having gained knowledge. But at the same time, no matter how paradoxical it may sound, it is frozen in the time of uncertainty - it is in the future, but at the same time, it does not exist at all, and does not exist.

Isn't it amazing how many things have to happen for something in the world to happen? Oh, this universe ... you see, those dwarfs are not people at all, but exactly the same androids created to exploit their own kind, and in exactly the same way, information is recorded in them, and in exactly the same way, one of them disappears in the future. Puppets in the hands of the smartest. The one who owns information, knowledge in the scientific field controls the world and time itself. What could be more terrible in the world than a place and time that you do not control and do not control? Is that the world that controls reality.

Let's leave this boring time and boring space and go to a world where migratory harmonicas create waves in the Pacific Ocean with their singing. Their amazing songs, reaching the ears of the ocean, make it tremble, which causes goosebumps to appear on the surface in the form of a wave. It is impossible to believe how many meters those waves reach - hitting each other over and over again, more precisely, one after another into one seemingly tiny wave area, they create a tsunami ten kilometers in size to the tenth degree, and I’ll tell you no less that sweeps away the raven-funnel. Lucky that they have such a body structure that water passes through them. Probably many birds; teacup gulls, giraffe starlings, cat pelicans, toothache storks and many other amazing creatures fly so high that a tsunami cannot reach them.

Seeing a wave, a mountain on land gets up and runs towards the ocean, raises its hands, and from the other side of the shore they throw a blanket at it, a layer of earth - elastic, a mantle, to hold back the wave, which can kill land animals. The mountains here are completely alive, intelligent, and protect the peace of the smaller brothers. For example, the marshmallow gorilla is not able to save its face in the heat and during abundant humidity - it hides in the shade, and uses the services of a fan snake. He, as befits all snakes in those circles, sticks out his tongue; he spins, spins, blows. The shift lasts twelve hours - after that, the marshmallow gorilla can calmly walk at seven degrees without melting. The snake comes home, hangs the working tongue on a hook, changes it to a home one and sits down to eat. Exceptionally airy meat-flavored peas to store gas until the next morning;

There is also a deer tent in those parts. An incredible animal that can be domesticated and fed with carbon dioxide. So, for example, people, of whom there are also enough here, only they are mixed with other species, but quite reasonable for themselves - beckon deer-tents and lie down to sleep under them. Obviously, when they exhale, people create carbon dioxide, which is why those animals go crazy. For a long time they follow people in the hope of breathing again the gas exhaled by this strange creature. Many nomadic tribes take advantage of this. It is convenient when the tent walks by itself and shelters from bad weather. No backpacks. Hyena Indians and Aztec antelopes look funny, followed by gypsy chickens with thin legs. It is strange that only their leg mutated from everything.

In some parts of the earth, where it is more difficult to get to than to fly over the upper layer of the universe, sand warriors live. Do you know what those creatures are famous for? Oh, those cruel grains of sand, it was not for nothing that they were separated from the universe itself. There were more in my memory, but less today. God never intervened in the world, but these monsters made time itself go back. Meaning in what sense? The meaning is different, it will not be possible to explain it at once. You can endure everything in the world, but this ...

We will tell about this in another story, in the universe four hundred and forty-four. After all, this is a completely different universe, and there was simply not enough space for her here.

They say that life is arranged in such a way that everyone has his own way of life, on which he can become what he is destined to be; either a sea angler, or a parachute rope, or that wave that beats against the rocks on the shore ... but it's another thing to be a man. They have so much chest pain, so much pain... They live day by day, suffer, cry, but endure and live on. They are afraid of death, it is pointless to argue with this - even on the days when they pass away, they cry that they have to say goodbye.

The monkfish is not afraid of death - he is stupid, he does not need to think about such trifles as the end of his life. He understands that someday he will disappear, emigrate, perhaps like his father, and disappear from sight. Only the devil does not know that his father died, and did not sail anywhere. Nowhere...

This story happened to me on the day when the moon turned its dark side to the earth and said:

“Hey buddy, didn’t you expect?” - it turned out that all this time, billions of years, she was sleeping and was alive. Luna smiled, then yawned. An incalculable number of bacteria fell on the earth, which our world did not know; from mouth. There were no disasters, however ...

People on that day acquired superpowers, abilities, amazing and powerful. I gained the ability to die and be reborn as something else. No matter who I was, my cycle of life ended on the fifth day of existence. The ability to die and be reborn, to grow in five days from a baby to an old man - that's my fate. And only in five days could I achieve something - otherwise my whole life would have no meaning.

This has never happened before in the universe - it was some kind of glitch, a software failure. The gods did not expect that the virus would be able to endow their "dolls" with abilities. We are chains of numbers in a computer simulation... bytes, but bytes not knowing that they are just information on a hard drive. Our program code has all the information that there should be blood in a cut, and our brain associates a rainbow of bytes as a stream of blood, and like the whole other world, outside our systems, is trying to save a life and heal a person.

Only I, the pixel of information in the computer case of a god, could discern true death—and only I knew I was inside a simulation of the universe. Earth is one of the trillions of worlds inside a hard drive. And one day I was reborn as information - yes, it’s strange that it’s not a stone. Was reborn as information and flew out of the hard drive right into the creator's room and got into the tiny, tiny brain of a cockroach and became sentient, capturing its cells. For the first time in the universe, a cockroach acquired the power of a person - thinking.

You hardly know what it's like to be so tiny and run like a fool in all paws so as not to be crushed. I myself found out exactly on that day - my paws are so small, but so nimble, marvelous ... however, my cries are not audible to God, why not ... because my mouth is smaller than the smallest creature. Besides, there was no tongue in that filthy mouth. And as soon as I found out about it, I jumped off a loaf of bread and ran into a gap on the wall of God's apartment. I had no desire to die, but unfortunately... while running among the pack of cereals, a spider attacked me and ate it, the byte flew out of the cockroach and moved into the spider.

- It's damn delicious! - you know, I used to eat bread crumbs, but I tried a cockroach for the first time. No… anything at all in your life; there was no simulation of taste here, and everything was real and alive. The taste was somewhat similar to ours, only tart, sweet and woeful, the most real, and not its emulation.

In this body, as he said, he lived for five days, hiding and trying to survive. In the body of a spider, I was not destined to become someone majestic, except among the flies that whispered while sitting on the ceiling, what an insidious monster I was - among them I was definitely popular. On the fifth day I had a heart attack - I saw another spider. I never thought that I would fall in love with a spider. And the byte flew out of the room into the open window and wandered in the wind for two years, sticking to the walls, walking among the willows, among the stones and mud. It is strange that I only became someone alive - this ability was probably designed for that, so that I would not live like a stone for millions of centuries. So, at the end of the second year - in the body of the living and the dead, I was thrown into the body of an old man in the hospital, through a mosquito net, my byte flew up to the dying person and flew into the nostril. In a moment

And I was destined to live exactly five days. And I was ready to give my whole life just to find the creator of my world and save those who remained locked up in this ill-fated hard drive. Friends, family, people...

Pulling the dropper out of his hand, he collapsed to the floor. Started to crawl. There was something in his mouth. It was my tongue—a decrepit, dry, crumpled senile tongue. And I could talk to them. Just didn't know how to do it. Previously, the program in me spoke for me - now, I myself have become a program, but without the knowledge of such a complex being as a person.

The doors opened, and a girl ran up to me and grabbed my hands, lifted me up and laid me on the bed. Something from the category of a chicken-and-fish dialect came out of me.

- You had a stroke, the third. Your brain is damaged. You will lie in bed for the rest of your life.

"What now?! Hell yes, I'll be lying down! Well, let me go to my creator!” I shouted, and deafened my mind. But not a single word escaped me. In the last three days, I have learned to read. Watched TV; learned to open his mouth and stir the saliva in his mouth. If I were a blender, I would be the best blender in the whole world!

Doctors did not believe me that I could speak, because I was silent from the very birth in this useless body. And on the fifth day I died - the stench of the hospital ward never knew when the intestines of this old sponge relaxed. And I ate in this body, as for the last time; no matter how in yourself.

Byte fell on the sheet, mixed in shit and I became a worm. What a useless life! To exist and to exist… I had never tasted shit before, but I found out that there is something useful in it too. For the first time, not people spoke to me, but people like me - worms. They didn't talk much, but often.

- Tasty.

- Have a nice one.

- Wag your tail.

And since I had a mind and learned to read and speak during my lifetime, I often complained about them.

- What is your meaning? What is your mission in life?

- Tasty.

- Have a nice one.

- Wag your tail.

Five days, but that's a whole infinity in this disgusting body! I wanted to die quickly, and went on a hunger strike, dried up, turned pale, and died. But on the fifth day.

The next moment... disgusting moment, but so blissful. I am a dove. Worthless, stupid dove - with a tongue, but you can't even call it a tongue. A dried stick, a dry, dead caterpillar that has fallen out of an apple is a thin twig. With such a tongue, you can only drink water from a bell and pick food between your teeth. Doves don't even have teeth!

I used to hate people, so I flew and ate a lot, then shit on those. For the first time in my life it brought me pleasure, after that I got tired and I flew aimlessly. They looked in two directions, to the right and to the left, I circled in place and chewed gum from the asphalt. She got stuck in my throat and I suffocated and died an inglorious death.

I died while still in flight and became a bullet, falling on the head of a little girl, whose skull I pierced with a beak, and she, having fallen, died - and I became a girl. Parents did not notice anything - it lasted a split second. And I pretended to be their child. How it will hurt them when I'm gone next week. They will grieve, but I don't care about them. I decided for myself one thing - to find my home. And he ran away from them where his eyes looked - they looked ahead. Well, finally, I had only forward. I ran a few centimeters per second - the body was partly only three years old. My parents grabbed me and put me in a stroller, an all-terrain vehicle for slow children.

— LET ME GO FREE, MONSTERS! - ula-la trawl, booga nuga, nnaga, fpoof, that's what my parents heard, and they stuck a pacifier in my mouth, as if I were asking for food. I confess that the nipple interested me very much. Delicious infection!

Little is not enough, but five days have passed. In order not to injure my parents with a heart attack or a stroke, one of the evenings when I walked among wild animals in the zoo, I let go of my mother's hand and ran into the aviary to the lions. There I was accepted. You can't imagine how much noise there was! But after all, this baby died a long time ago, and I wear his skin on me.

The next life was a dog's. I had a friend, an old man. It is unlikely that he understood something, but he looked at me understandingly. We walked, walked, ate and had fun together. He told me about his life, about his long-lost wife, about the children they wanted with her but couldn't conceive. Somehow I didn’t want to leave him - after all, he is a man and obviously with a big soul, who knew the grief of loss, and who did not know love and understanding.

When I died, the byte remained here, lying on the carpet, next to my body. The dog was buried. And a month later, the old man himself died. And I moved into his body. Reborn them.

And now, I was an old man unknown to anyone who was looking for hope.

I remember the places I've been. Before I became infirm in the hospital, I lay on the branches of trees in front of the creator's house for many days. I knew and remembered the routes along which I flew, and I knew exactly which floor my God was on.

It's good to be old. No one talks to them or asks for help. Before entering the house and knocking, I made a cocktail of words in my mouth and spoke. And the words existed. They were. I knocked.

Here my life ended... I was sucked back into the computer case and the old man's body fell and died. Here, watching from the ground, I see one thing... the moon has no dark side, and people are all exactly the same and ordinary. And I myself became ordinary. No matter how much I shouted, no one heard me. In the morning, after a long sleep in the simulation, I went to work, but remembering those moments of life that I was connected by real reality. And I remembered them until the end of my life ... until the day when we were formatted.

On a branch of a green cactus, a lone but lively dragonfly was sitting and smoking a pipe, and thinking about something while smacking its lips. The mouse looking through the spyglass immediately realized that the dragonfly was thinking about a new portion of the wind. The mouse was able to read minds through a telescope, but did not tell anyone about it, so as not to scare away luck. Ever since the wind was hijacked by Santa Claus due to bad weather behavior, all those who fly have become crawlers.

Santa rubbed his hands, stroked his beard, and did not think about the suffering of earthly creatures. On the day when Klaus delivered gifts to children who behaved satisfactorily, there was a snowstorm, a terrible blizzard, and the heavenly road was not visible. Santa got lost and the gifts weren't delivered until 5am, and the kids thought they had been behaving badly, and the cookies left for Santa stuck to the plate and became part of the plate itself. And good children became evil, cursing Christmas. Santa himself became evil, believe it or not? The most evil of the evil ones, and the wind stole it, and doomed everyone to suffering. There were fans in hell to fan the fires under the vat, and even those devils were more merciful and did not get rid of the breaths. But Santa, apparently, was the father of Satan. You can't say it any other way, can you? Imagine the fans could not cool the sweating bodies on a hot night ... and the clothes left to air on the balcony were always wet, and the room was always stuffy. Dogs sticking out their tongues didn't get cold, the boiling water never got to room temperature.

The mouse understood that the dragonfly was old, and without the wind she could not go upstairs and visit the kindergarten in the field of daffodils and see the children. How many predators in those places were already uncountable. Horror and nightmare one!

Anger did not leave the nimble mouse, as cunning as dust that clogs in the nostril of the nose, waiting for someone to start breathing. She sent a telescope through the universes, through a black hole in the ground, which she used only on rare occasions and covered with a wooden cover assembled from oak planks, and looked into Klaus's thoughts. Santa was disgustingly pleased.

What was Santa thinking about that the mouse immediately looked away from the pipe and hid in a corner? Oh, that trumpet of truth...

Those thoughts hovered over such things as crunchy popcorn made from mouse brains and cured meat from the paws of dragonflies, frogs, a pair of maple chair legs and a hundred-year-old egg of a dead bull. Santa was a foodie. Based on the thoughts of this crazy grandfather, soon, the mouse will make a horror movie that will make everyone become kind. The mouse showed in that film all the delights of disobedience, how Santa drinks eyeballs with a straw from a cocktail, and spreads gray matter on bread and bites into sharp earlobes and cartilage of shaking hamstrings.

And we continue.

The dragonfly turned around, squinted, midges flew into the eye every now and then, she shook them out of them, they fell to the ground, got up and cursed and ran away under the leaves. How could they fly into the eyes when there was no wind? They built the jet suit in the lab, inside an acorn far in the woods, thirteen meters from the dragonfly.

Having collected the telescope in a suitcase, the mouse put it in his pocket and jumped down on the cable car from the vines, and ran to the dragonfly, apparently, help. Having reached the place, the mouse cut down the flower with its tail and gently, like a rose petal, grabbed the insect and stroked it:

“Everything will be fine, I won’t let anyone hurt you!” - and ate a dragonfly - no one!

Then she ran to the field of daffodils, and exterminated the whole family.

Santa Claus, meanwhile, was enjoying solitude, eating the last smoked elf, and, throwing the bones into the urn, stood up and shouted:

- Okay, for the last time! - he opened the lock on his eyebrows and released the wind to freedom.

The wind ran without looking back, its eyes were large from fear, on the way it crashed several times on the void, on the droppings of an air crocodile, on the pollen of fairies. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and sat down on the ledge of Everest.

- I'm over it! - and jumped down. Somersaulting along the slope, over the stones and having stuffed a couple of bumps for itself, the wind got up, shook itself off - they don’t let me live normally!

An evil evil wind rushed into the lungs of living beings, climbed and climbed into them until the lungs exploded and the creatures died. At one hundred and ninety-five, he got fed up and went to work. One hundred rubles an hour. And the wind howled and howled, wandering around the world for years, in order to save up for a cave in order to rest, once in a lifetime, give birth to a baby and die. Even though he was a guy. However, he initiated himself as a girl. That's how it's supposed to be. So fashionable now.

They have always been there for as long as I can remember. When I had to close my eyes from unbearable fatigue, they crept closer, quietly put the ladder on the floor, climbed on them, jumped on my face to open portals on their cheeks; with a small, thin key - the mosquito bit more painfully - and disappeared. It was like that every night. I definitely had a presentiment; in the morning my cheek itched, and in the place, apparently, where they paved the path, there were traces of incredibly tiny boots. But how can I know how painfully the doors to other dimensions opened? The mosquito bit me, too. There were no mosquitoes in the city. Here, to tell you, at that time I was sleeping, however, my astral body at that time was watching them. They, these insignificant creatures, often turned around, one of the tiny people even held some kind of canister in his hands, most likely a soporific canister.

In an instant, I flew into the doors of another dimension and was dumbfounded, as if I had seen a ghost; inside everything was more beautiful than in dreams. No thoughts on the theme of fantasy could even come close to what I had to see with my own eyes, the eyes of the astral body. But, at that time, I had not yet had to think about such things, however, it would be worth starting. A man without fantasies is nothing more than rubbish without thoughts. With the same success, a person could become a spoon. We will talk about them later.

It was a world where time stood still. Any only representations of the worlds, which people had before me and after me, were concentrated in this universe. The little people ran up the concrete stairs to a huge structure, at least bigger than the biggest truck they'd ever seen, where, in all likelihood, sat the most senior of their people. However, it was impossible to say for sure. These people were extremely careful. One had only to think about the fact that there is a god sitting there, then the god would disappear, but still appear where he was not expected. Therefore, tiny people went wherever they wanted, and wherever they went, God sat. The one who gave them the keys to my cheeks, the manipulator of their feelings and desires.

Taking off after the people, a sharp and strong slap on my face stopped me. I fell to the floor and blood flowed from my forehead - gelatinous; the blood turned into beasts, and ran through the air to the milky way and disappeared into the void, somewhere in the darkness of the bootes. The man inside the building saw me. Rather, everyone who was here saw me - even the wall opposite, which turned out to have a face that strongly resembled Lincoln. Everything hidden in this dimension acquired a physical body and became visible. Immediately, as soon as I fell, and before I had time to recover, four tiny people ran up to me, injected something into my leg, and I became just like them - a dwarf. God took me in the palm of his hand and swallowed. A moment later, the room became light. In front of me sat an ordinary, very ordinary, believe me, man. He had an anime cap on his head, a watch on his wrists, True, with a broken dial, but still, he looked like a usually simple hikikomori. No wonder he retired to an empty room.

He threw some keys on the table and told me to choose one that I liked, but apparently the god got angry later because I didn’t like any of them. Then he spat me out saying that my presence is not worthy in this dimension.

Alas, they couldn't kick me out. No matter what I guessed, in this world it came true. When the portal opened, I shouted out loud that I didn’t want to leave and the world couldn’t live without me, then the world really collapsed into a tiny matchbox and started to burn. The world knew that without me it could not survive, and no other desire could be stronger than mine. Each desire was strong, but one desire could not spoil the desire of another.

As I walked down the stairs, I looked around. It was dark in the sky, it was clear that around me, and everywhere where I was not at that moment, there were stars. Some went out, others just started to glow. Where there seemed to be no light, there was light. Several hundred planets were circling near the orbit of my presence, on those fragments of stones lived a lot of extraordinarily amazing creatures. In one, which I bothered to see, and which I will remember for a long time when I return to the real world, there was; people with their necks stretched out from hoses, legs from sprouted dandelions, and the body of the earth, our own, elephant. They pedaled on bicycles, and those bicycles had their feet in brown boots. Their pets followed behind them. We would call them "those whom we tamed", but, unfortunately, maybe fortunately, these themselves could afford pets. Crocodiles had sharp claws with them, and each claw was equipped with a chain that could spin and saw everything along the way - the crocodile gutted the living planet the only way, without effort, and streams of blood formed behind it - the taste of cherry juice. A lively nightingale sat on the crocodile's head, waving a whip and controlling it, and ants engineers lived inside him, who designed life on that planet, and by not cunning manipulations with evolution and experiments, created these monsters. Not the size of the brain determined the level of intelligence and genius, but the size of knowledge. swinging the whip and controlling it, and ants engineers lived inside him, who designed life on that planet, and through not cunning manipulations with evolution and experiments, created these monsters. Not the size of the brain determined the level of intelligence and genius, but the size of knowledge. swinging the whip and controlling it, and ants engineers lived inside him, who designed life on that planet, and through not cunning manipulations with evolution and experiments, created these monsters. Not the size of the brain determined the level of intelligence and genius, but the size of knowledge.

In another, but no less small, stupefyingly colossal, exactly larger than my room in the apartment, there lived socks that put people on their feet, and in the evening threw them into the washing machine. The washing machine chewed on people, turned them over with their hands, squeezed them, pulled their little bodies, put them back, smacked, sucked, rinsed in the mouth, then, with a strong gust of wind from the nostril, dried them, and while the socks were watching TV, hung people on clothespins on the balcony. And, after the shift, as expected, she went to the kitchen to cook dinner for herself.

A thousand planets, and each of them is unique in its own way. In the other, which I could barely see while I was in a hurry to see the others, cups of water were running around. And they did it for a reason. They were angry that they had to live on a planet where, if you stop, the ground falls from under your feet, and they break. Therefore, the faster the cups ran, the faster they boiled with anger, after which, a man came out of the house on that planet, stretched out his hand, and, going up to a tree with leaves, plucked them and threw them into boiling water. The leaves cringed in fear and went under themselves, black slurry, so tea was obtained. The giant drank it and went home. He poured a new portion of water, and released the cup to freedom, to run again.

- Don't be afraid! What are you trembling about?! - the giant calmed the leaf of the tree, which he pulled out of the boiling water. Liszt immediately stopped trembling, calmed down, his voice acted like medicine. Straightened out, and went home, on a branch, to sleep. When I dreamed, I got here, cloned. It was impossible to see a dream within a dream without getting into the world of dreams. In the meantime, the turn will come to him, many brothers will drink and brew him, therefore, in the next few days, he rejoiced. A man didn't take the same poor thing several times a week.

In the next one, it was impossible to count how many of them, no matter how much I wanted to, because the cosmos was huge and endless. Here ... you lived, my reader. And he did the same thing that you are doing now, read these lines and did not even know that he was being watched and smiled. Reader, you thought it was all a fantasy, a book, but still, you were watched, but you won’t know for sure. And I read this line, and the next, subsequent text, and so on until the very end. I thought I even saw myself there.

Suddenly, someone hit me on the leg, and I bowed, as if I didn’t bow to anyone, I even washed the floor while standing, but slept on the wall, tied my sneakers with my hair on my calves. But, here it's different, I was forced to kneel before nothing. It was Chuck Palahniuk. He rehearsed punches before writing the next fight club scene. Behind him stood Howard Lovecraft - viciously trying to portray a monster, and when he succeeded, hiding under Chuck's skirt. "This will definitely be scarier than any obscene gnomes and queens of spades," Howard thought to himself, slobbering his fingers and writing in a notebook.

I would have stayed here for a little more time, but, alas, sleep comes to an end, and it lasted seven minutes in the room, and how many hours have passed here ... The most beautiful few hours. I asked for the desire to leave, and the world perfectly understood that the freedom of my speech, the most important word, and released me, thereby giving tiny people a chance to kick me out of their world. True, it didn't hurt me. I am an astral.

I woke up, scratched my cheek, but forgot the dream. This was written by my pocket ants engineers who happened to be in my pocket, quite by accident, and pulled the information out of my brain. I hope somehow I don't crush them while sitting at the table as they move jet ships from the table to the floor.